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Duke launches sexual rescue

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Having returned to Duke Towers after a succsessful mining exhibition to Zimbabwe formally known as Rhodesia, The Duke has an important announcement. Since his last award winning post it is evident that nothing has changed on this site of lust and sin. Incapable men are still pawing and fumbling at bouncing breasts whilst pathetically inferior love pumps get little reaction from local sin slits. The Duke will take this opportunity to reassure all female swingers, even those below a 8/10 that he will be launching a full scale sexual rescue mission next Wednesday. Once more you will be able to lose control of your loins as you gaze upon the glory thst is the buldge of The Dukes massive manhood and enormus ball satchel nestled snugly inside your banana hammock.

Tragically so far this summer 97% of female swingers have been subjected to lacklusture performances, tiny dribbles of cum and below par initial courtship. Every swinger is aware that once you pass the screening process a select few are posted the golden envelope which contains an invitation to Duke Towers. The lastest batch will now include a coupon offering you discount for The Dukes next Life Coaching lecture. The Duke can only grimace with dismay at the lazy single sentence messeges you will have received during his absence. This wil cease from today and as The Duke writes this piece his team are busy dampening the quills with the purist Italian ink in preparation for the Summer Ball invitations.

Invitations this year will exclude the new generation of millenial swingers, which means androgynous degenerates covered in ugly prison tattoos who talk endlessly about female empowerment whilst sporting a vigorously sodomised anus hole. Swinger couples will also be excuded from not only invitations but The Dukes rescue mission also. Your banged out cavernous orifices and beefy camel toe meat wallets are beyond redemption just as your middle aged partners pathetic pending to the hopelessly depraved appetites of the infidel populace revolt The Duke.

The majority of you will have noticed the summer of 2018 has been the hottest yet quietist in living memory. This is due to men other than The Duke attempting to pleasure cock caves and pink allys throughout the United Kingdom. Female swingers have barely made a sound whilst they silently vomit as a pale tubby stomach taps for a few minutes against bored bolbous ass cheeks. This all to common occurrence will also cease now the gifted pink torpedo has retunred. Expect to hear squeals and screams of delight from houses, hotels, carparks and graveywards as The Duke mighty serpent ploughs sin slit after sin slit, stretching local baby boxers and loosening anal cavities without mercy.

It is no coincidence that local droughts and hosepipe bans have coincided with The Dukes absence. Your dissapointments and frustrations at the trickle of cum your holes have recieved have been noted. Unfortunately none but The Duke can offer the huge, holy and organic loads that have been pumped inside hungry whores. You have had to make do with shriveled ball sacks, depleted tanks and seman of lower class qauilty normally corrupted buy alchol, cigarettes and fatty foods. Thankfully this cum catastrophe will also cease. Indeed, to swallow The Dukes cum is equivalent to sipping from The Holy Grail. Over 86% of woman have reported feeling refreshed and re-vitalised after gulping down a huge portion of The Dukes baby batter.

The Duke trusts you will all be reassured after reading this post. Soon deserved swingers will be rescued from sexual purgatory. No longer will you have to tolerate the tiny worms that have invaded your sacred holes but instead rejoice as The Dukes mighty meat stick fills you completely and be safe in the knowledge that the love he shoots inside will define you for ever.

Duke has spoken

#Duke

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Didn't you do this yesterday? Still too long still didn't read.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Boring xx

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

And block button........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I often get copy and paste stuff like this inboxed to from random straight guys on fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

“The Dukes mighty meat stick fills you completely and be safe in the knowledge that the love he shoots inside will define you for ever.”

Poetic as ever! Long live The Duke!!! *fangirls*

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Green arrow

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Certainly not 3rd time lucky

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wednesday you say?

Damn, I'm going to be out of the country.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank god im old, fugly and part of a couple x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've seen shorter posts in Stories and Fanaties

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By *W ChapMan
over a year ago

Swindon

Wow.......I tried to read it but gave up. Please let me know if this works for any of the ladies and I'll type up some old bollocks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Welcome back Duke.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"“The Dukes mighty meat stick fills you completely and be safe in the knowledge that the love he shoots inside will define you for ever.”

Poetic as ever! Long live The Duke!!! *fangirls* "

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