FabSwingers.com forum: Question for the ladies

By *iamondsmiles. OP Woman
over a year ago

SW1A1AA

And men. How would you feel if you where going to be meeting someone for sex and they asked you for written consent?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd ask them what had happened previously for them to need written consent.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Vexed

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By *aven RedWoman
over a year ago

the land of BOBFOC x

"I'd ask them what had happened previously for them to need written consent.

This

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

I’d ask what the had in mind before the written consent was given

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By *randMrsPipCouple
over a year ago

Alfreton

"I'd ask them what had happened previously for them to need written consent.

This!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd ask them what had happened previously for them to need written consent.

Definitely this, and wondering what exactly they were wanting to do x

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By *iamondsmiles. OP Woman
over a year ago

SW1A1AA

"I'd ask them what had happened previously for them to need written consent.

"
say he had an ex girlfriend that had accused him of ra*pe when he had been innocent

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By *iamondsmiles. OP Woman
over a year ago

SW1A1AA

"I’d ask what the had in mind before the written consent was given

"
anything. From straightforward vanilla sex to bdsm. If they also had the boundaries written down

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

Crumpet Castle

If he was the last man on the planet and I was about to die unless I got a semen injection i'd risk it....... otherwise i'd see it as an omen and move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not a chance.

If something awful had happened previously and this is how he's still feeling then I would hope he'd hold back from relationships until trust had started to reappear.

Peach x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I be the party of the first part...

Is there a sanity clause

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd ask them what had happened previously for them to need written consent.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I'm surprised it's not more common.

We don't ask for written proof but we do make very sure that people know how we do things before we meet and vice versa. I'm frequently surprised at the amount of people who "go with the flow" then get surprised when someone over steps their unexpressed boundaries.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I'd have a conversation that would include discussing that consent could be withdrawn at any point and that would have to be written into the terms of consent.

I understand the place this comes from but it's flawed.

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By *ekyllnHideCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

"I'm surprised it's not more common.

We’ve spoken about this many times saying it wouldn’t surprise us that the younger generation are going to end up having to have contract hey carry about with them!!

So many poor guys have been accused and then been found innocent and it destroys their lives!! Sadly, “some” women get all jealous and can get their own back at someone by accusing them and copious attention too!! It’s frightening.....they have serious issues!!!

I’m the female talking here, and actually ashamed of being a woman sometimes!! But like all of this historical sex abuse.....I just don’t get someone waiting 10/20/30 years before reporting someone....it makes me question their reasons!!! X

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

[Removed by poster at 12/08/18 15:01:59]

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I'm surprised it's not more common.

We’ve spoken about this many times saying it wouldn’t surprise us that the younger generation are going to end up having to have contract hey carry about with them!!

I get it and I hope those genuinely in pain finally feel free of it.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Before the thread goes too much further can I just remind people that discussion of illegal subjects isn't allowed.

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

I would want to know exactly what I was consenting too.

Could end up r**ing or doing stuff you (I)never imagined then saying you consented to all those things.

I imagine the wording is everything.

But no I would not sign anything.

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By *ekyllnHideCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

"I'm surprised it's not more common.

We’ve spoken about this many times saying it wouldn’t surprise us that the younger generation are going to end up having to have contract hey carry about with them!!

I get it and I hope those genuinely in pain finally feel free of it.

For those being honest, then I get it!! But sadly, I think many many have jumped on the bandwagon which causes problems for the honest ones....x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd say it's pretty pointless as consent can be withdrawn at any time.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I get it and I hope those genuinely in pain finally feel free of it.

For those being honest, then I get it!! But sadly, I think many many have jumped on the bandwagon which causes problems for the honest ones....x"

That is the same for everything. Just look at how people talk about benefit fraud. A minority, and it really is a minority, who falsely accuse or fiddle benefits, or whatever the issue is, make people question what is going on. That's not enough for me to doubt everyone and I choose to believe until I learn otherwise or have solid reasons to doubt their account.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"If he was the last man on the planet and I was about to die unless I got a semen injection i'd risk it....... otherwise i'd see it as an omen and move on."

This!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd ask them what had happened previously for them to need written consent.

Very much this. And I'd run.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd ask them what had happened previously for them to need written consent.

say he had an ex girlfriend that had accused him of ra*pe when he had been innocent"

I'd feel bad for him but I'd still probably run/ say sorry not for me.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

Crumpet Castle

Assuming he is going to commit r*pe

You don't sign the contract and he does.

You do sign the contract and he does and he has a contract to say you said he could have sex with you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't meet them. It has the potential to be too complicated and drama packed. I select my partners carefully to avoid such things.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

GDPR

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

London sometimes

I got sent quite a lengthy contract recently when looking for a meet. Full of terms and conditions. I shit you not!!

It seemed like overkill. Urfice it to say, It didn’t happen!! One of the Ts and Cs was no kissing.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"GDPR

I comply by never asking for names or personal details.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't meet them. Consent in sexual activity isn't so straight forward.

We have the right to retract our consent at anytime and signing a contract to say I consent to sex? Seems like the perfect excuse to cross boundaries or ignore any retraction of consent. No thanks!

Eve. x

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"GDPR

I comply by never asking for names or personal details. "

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"I'd say it's pretty pointless as consent can be withdrawn at any time."

This ^

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd ask them what had happened previously for them to need written consent.

say he had an ex girlfriend that had accused him of ra*pe when he had been innocent

I'd feel bad for him but I'd still probably run/ say sorry not for me. "

Mud sticks, doesn't it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is a big no from me

Sex isn’t a business contract....

It would take all the fun out of it

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By *isa 59Woman
over a year ago

Newcastle

Personally, I'd say 'no thank you'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd ask them what had happened previously for them to need written consent.

say he had an ex girlfriend that had accused him of ra*pe when he had been innocent

I'd feel bad for him but I'd still probably run/ say sorry not for me.

Mud sticks, doesn't it?"

It does but that's not really why I'd run. I'd imagine he'd be traumatised by the experience of being falsely accused. He needs someone else, not me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Even if you gave someone written consent, you can still change your mind at any time, so it doesn’t really mean anything

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Bed waiting

"And men. How would you feel if you where going to be meeting someone for sex and they asked you for written consent?"

I wouldn't be surprised by it, sadly this is the way things are going now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And men. How would you feel if you where going to be meeting someone for sex and they asked you for written consent?"

It’s not a bad idea specially when you pull on a night out

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Who would witness the signing of the contract to ensure there was no coercion?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't imagine any sane person falling for this tbh.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I can't imagine any sane person falling for this tbh. "

Last year I read reports of American men filming consent being given. I am worried that people don't seem to understand consent well enough, that it's not a catchall, or get out of jail free card, or that it can be withdrawn.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can't imagine any sane person falling for this tbh.

Yes. That's where it falls down. I reserve the right to say "Fuck off!!"

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I'd say it's pretty pointless as consent can be withdrawn at any time."

Bingo.

And I'd be wary of someone who claimed false accusation. I'd steer clear.

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