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Judging

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By *rblue38 OP   Man
over a year ago

Maidstone

Well this is not a moan or anything like that cause there plenty of nice people on here. I know there more men than women on here but women are very quick to judge. I send alot of nice friendly messages out and my most the responses I get is sorry your not my type or not interested. What I find funny is the some of them go to the same swinger clubs as me and are the complete oppersite. I think some the women should not judge on a photo alone. I think. Maybe I just have bad luck from a fab point of view. Having said all this I have met some very nice people from the parties I have attended. I just wish people would not be as shallow. Anyway rant over

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I’m not sure, but your screen name could conceivably be putting off a few ladies....

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By *tirluvMan
over a year ago

the right frame of mind -London


"I’m not sure, but your screen name could conceivably be putting off a few ladies...."

Especially when you are limited to only 37 at a time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People do come across differently on line than they do in person OP.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

What are we supposed to judge on? You curate your presence here and thus give the information for people to assess.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What are we supposed to judge on? You curate your presence here and thus give the information for people to assess. "

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By *ercymallowMan
over a year ago

Belfast / Dublin

I guess because it’s probably to do with how many messages they receive... I’m sure they’re all overwhelmed with it.

And you know yourself a physical space with you in it allows you to shine better and the “real” you translates better...

Keep being nice OP... it’ll come through

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People can only go on your pictures, profile, and what you write in your message

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By *rblue38 OP   Man
over a year ago

Maidstone

Wife told me to change it to that username cause she said I would get more attention. I am not having a dig at all. Just simply pondering why I get alot of women who say they are not interested then are if I meet them at say eurekas for example. I will take all feedback as positive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Wife told me to change it to that username cause she said I would get more attention. I am not having a dig at all. Just simply pondering why I get alot of women who say they are not interested then are if I meet them at say eurekas for example. I will take all feedback as positive "

Time, place, and circumstances etc.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I'm way pickier online than I am in a club, as I'm drowning in attention here. Plus in a club I'm much safer than I might be meeting a stranger one to one.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

And personally I find explicit usernames naff. It's not a deal breaker, but it's certainly a point against.

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By *rblue38 OP   Man
over a year ago

Maidstone


"And personally I find explicit usernames naff. It's not a deal breaker, but it's certainly a point against. "

I did have photodanuk as I used to be a photographer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well this is not a moan or anything like that cause there plenty of nice people on here. I know there more men than women on here but women are very quick to judge. I send alot of nice friendly messages out and my most the responses I get is sorry your not my type or not interested. What I find funny is the some of them go to the same swinger clubs as me and are the complete oppersite. I think some the women should not judge on a photo alone. I think. Maybe I just have bad luck from a fab point of view. Having said all this I have met some very nice people from the parties I have attended. I just wish people would not be as shallow. Anyway rant over "

In my time here, I have had only one reply to any of my messages, which was simply "no thanks".

I believe that women get a huge number of messages from men, so I can understand that they need to get through their messages quickly and make a reasonably quick appraisal. Photos and first text of the message probably creates a basis on which to decide. It's probably like sifting through CVs.

I do appreciate your point about politeness. Even though it's got me nowhere yet, I will still conduct myself as I would in person.

I don't object to having messages read and deleted with no response, but ignored completely or read and not actioned just leaves me not knowing what to do. Follow up, or leave it?

I'm sure it's not being disrespectful, but simply managing time as best as they can.

I have yet to visit s club, so I may have better luck there.

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By *arciocialWoman
over a year ago

Leicester

I may say no to someone on a message but like them in person at a club. I can't help that the message/pic sent wasn't for me, I haven't got the time to chat to people when I don't find their picture attractive, at a club is totally different which is why I very rarely bother to meet people away from clubs.

Likewise I may meet them in person and find I'm not attracted to them.

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By *ondon_mashMan
over a year ago

London

Don't take it personal geez. Just how it goes on here. Competition is fierce. And the women are picky while spoilt for choice

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By *orkie321bWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

Meeting people in a club is entirely different to getting to know someone from their profile and messages.

In person you get to flirt and have all manner of non verbal communication too. You can easily convey your personality.

Online all you have is your profile pics and text and that first message which may easily get lost in many other messages.

If you find you are more successful at clubs then focus your efforts there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I’m super charged up in a club, I might have sex with someone I might not ordinarily choose.

Partially because I’m not thinking with my head. In that environment you’re looking at sex live, getting up close to it, smelling it, (with permission) able to reach out and touch it... plus there’s ambient lighting, and a seedy/sexy environment with Dungeon equipment etc..... .... plus Alcohol

It’s a heady mix, and I’m only human and horny

We’re talking immediate sex here!!!!

I’m already in the sexy outfit...

I don’t have to tidy the flat!

Or trek across London to meet.

Hardly the same as sitting in front of a screen after work, going through messages from.... all and sundry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I’m super charged up in a club, I might have sex with someone I might not ordinarily choose.

Partially because I’m not thinking with my head. In that environment you’re looking at sex live, getting up close to it, smelling it, (with permission) able to reach out and touch it... plus there’s ambient lighting, and a seedy/sexy environment with Dungeon equipment etc..... .... plus Alcohol

It’s a heady mix, and I’m only human and horny

We’re talking immediate sex here!!!!

I’m already in the sexy outfit...

I don’t have to tidy the flat!

Or trek across London to meet.

Hardly the same as sitting in front of a screen after work, going through messages from.... all and sundry. "

Right, I'll be looking for clubs near me now...

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Shallow person here. I judge whether I want to meet based on photos and profile. I'm pretty sure we'd soon be branded as time wasters if we decided to meet everyone who messaged, then rejected the majority.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Shallow person here. I judge whether I want to meet based on photos and profile. I'm pretty sure we'd soon be branded as time wasters if we decided to meet everyone who messaged, then rejected the majority. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I’m super charged up in a club, I might have sex with someone I might not ordinarily choose.

Partially because I’m not thinking with my head. In that environment you’re looking at sex live, getting up close to it, smelling it, (with permission) able to reach out and touch it... plus there’s ambient lighting, and a seedy/sexy environment with Dungeon equipment etc..... .... plus Alcohol

It’s a heady mix, and I’m only human and horny

We’re talking immediate sex here!!!!

I’m already in the sexy outfit...

I don’t have to tidy the flat!

Or trek across London to meet.

Hardly the same as sitting in front of a screen after work, going through messages from.... all and sundry.

Right, I'll be looking for clubs near me now..."

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By *rblue38 OP   Man
over a year ago

Maidstone


"When I’m super charged up in a club, I might have sex with someone I might not ordinarily choose.

Partially because I’m not thinking with my head. In that environment you’re looking at sex live, getting up close to it, smelling it, (with permission) able to reach out and touch it... plus there’s ambient lighting, and a seedy/sexy environment with Dungeon equipment etc..... .... plus Alcohol

It’s a heady mix, and I’m only human and horny

We’re talking immediate sex here!!!!

I’m already in the sexy outfit...

I don’t have to tidy the flat!

Or trek across London to meet.

Hardly the same as sitting in front of a screen after work, going through messages from.... all and sundry.

Right, I'll be looking for clubs near me now..."

The club meets are epic. I love the atmosphere. Even if nothing happens I always get to meet some amazing people. Highly recommend it

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