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filthy chat up lines!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Has anyone got any favourites or been chatted up with any recently that secretly turned u on!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A man messaged me earlier to say that he was going to sell all his furniture, so I had to sit on his face

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A man messaged me earlier to say that he was going to sell all his furniture, so I had to sit on his face "

Did it do it for you?did you get a tingle?haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A man messaged me earlier to say that he was going to sell all his furniture, so I had to sit on his face "

Damn I need to remember that line

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

I know what would look nice on your chin....

What....

My balls

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

I know your surname....

What is it then....

Jacobs

No its not

It has to be coz you're a right cracker...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I know what would look nice on your chin....

What....

My balls"

Oh love that one lol lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I know what would look nice on your chin....

What....

My balls

Oh love that one lol lol"

Haha #me too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah live was simple here in Ireland long ago when there were only two chat up lines by the older generation, one was actually a marriage proposal, which was

'How would you like to be buried with my people ?'

...and the other was not exactly a marriage proposal, that went

'How's your belly fixed for a lodger ?'

....ah they were simple repressed times, but there was very little confusing though on the upside

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want to kiss you softly on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I want to kiss you softly on the lips, then move up to your belly button. "

#smooth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This thread is educational

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll never for get overhearing a sweet old couple in their 80's sitting ob a park bench in Dublin a few years ago as dusk began to fall as the old man tried in vain to fix his wifes hearing aid in one hand, as he tenderly held her hand with his other. Resigned that the battery was dead, he carefully put it into her handbag and he began to comfort her with a loving smile and reassuring squeeze of her hand, when suddenly his face became intense and he turned to face her straight on as he cupped her face in his hands as he peered deep into her eyes and shouted

'Let's go home Asumpta. I can't wait to get into our bedroom and rip your knickers off....because jayses, their tearing the balls off me !'

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I want to kiss you softly on the lips, then move up to your belly button. "

This is the only one that's made me do anything other than cringe

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I know your surname....

What is it then....

Jacobs

No its not

It has to be coz you're a right cracker... "

Lool

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By *rwhite30Man
over a year ago

deptford London


"I want to kiss you softly on the lips, then move up to your belly button. "

used this and it worked, you are the man

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I know what would look nice on your chin....

What....

My balls"

Haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I want to kiss you softly on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

This is the only one that's made me do anything other than cringe "

But is that because it's me?

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham


"I want to kiss you softly on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

This is the only one that's made me do anything other than cringe "

Yes they cringe worthy and to be honest would only use them in rare but right circumstances...

But they fit criteria of thread title

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I want to kiss you softly on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

This is the only one that's made me do anything other than cringe

But is that because it's me?"

Even coming from you, this would make me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t want to be a pain in the arse so I’ve brought plenty of lube

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You remind me of my washing machine....

I’m gonna chuck my load in you and let you deal with it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I want to kiss you softly on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

This is the only one that's made me do anything other than cringe

But is that because it's me?

Even coming from you, this would make me "

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By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish

[Removed by poster at 23/07/18 11:49:04]

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By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish


"I want to kiss you softly on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

This is the only one that's made me do anything other than cringe

But is that because it's me?

Even coming from you, this would make me

"

Whatever you said I’d probably move in for a snog hatter!

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By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish


"Ah live was simple here in Ireland long ago when there were only two chat up lines by the older generation, one was actually a marriage proposal, which was

'How would you like to be buried with my people ?'

...and the other was not exactly a marriage proposal, that went

'How's your belly fixed for a lodger ?'

....ah they were simple repressed times, but there was very little confusing though on the upside

"

I’m actually picturing you saying this in a smooth Irish accent - and it’s making me smile!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I want to kiss you softly on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

This is the only one that's made me do anything other than cringe

But is that because it's me?

Even coming from you, this would make me

Whatever you said I’d probably move in for a snog hatter! "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You remind me of my washing machine....

I’m gonna chuck my load in you and let you deal with it "

.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the one that my old flatmate used to use and it worked nearly all the time

him "can i smell your feet"

girl with confused look "NO"

guy "must be yer fanny then!!!"

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By *hunderstruckMan
over a year ago

Northampton

I tried this the other day

I’m gonna call you little toe

She said why

Because I’m gonna bang you on the coffee table later

It didn’t work but got a good laugh off it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can only think of real sick ones which i’d never actually say .

I’ll keep them to myself incase people get the wrong idea of me. Just a twisted sense of humour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can only think of real sick ones which i’d never actually say .

I’ll keep them to myself incase people get the wrong idea of me. Just a twisted sense of humour "

Let’s give it a go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If we were squirrels would you let me bust my nuts in your hole?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What’s the difference between a Ferrari and an erection?

You haven’t given me a Ferrari

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By *ebjonnsonMan
over a year ago

Maldon

Man started dancing with a girl in a bar and asked “can I smell your fanny?”

“No you can’t “ she replied.

“Oh, it must be your feet then”.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Touch your toes and I'll show you where the rocket goes!

Over heard that beauty about 2 weeks ago in the pub... Not sure if it worked out not...haha

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"You remind me of my washing machine....

I’m gonna chuck my load in you and let you deal with it "

Haha easiest way to get a slap ????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My dick just passed away, can I bury it in your pussy?

Works well with puppy eyes!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Ok here goes,,,

Man:isit lunch time yet?

Girl:why?

Man:because your looking like a snack that I want to eat.

:p

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have only used one chat up line... If ya can call it that.. I have asked a few guys how they feel about much older women

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ah live was simple here in Ireland long ago when there were only two chat up lines by the older generation, one was actually a marriage proposal, which was

'How would you like to be buried with my people ?'

...and the other was not exactly a marriage proposal, that went

'How's your belly fixed for a lodger ?'

....ah they were simple repressed times, but there was very little confusing though on the upside

I’m actually picturing you saying this in a smooth Irish accent - and it’s making me smile! "

Well sure tis grand to know that they might still work across the sea, so it is

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