FabSwingers.com forum: "Single" men on this site....

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

IMO from being on here Why are the majority of "single" men such sleaze bags when messaging... why do they assume that because you are looking for some uncomplicated fun, you'll be available when they want it or will meet at the drop of a hat.. or their pants for that matter.

Their messages are crass, unintelligent, demeaning, and plain nasty and when it's deleted they have the audacity to then be rude! Yes yes this is a site for hook ups, casual encounters, regular naughty playmates or what ever you choose to use it for, but why the lack of respect? Are we seen as less because we are doing what many men have done for years and having our needs met without complications? I'm sure there are some women on here who can be just as disrespectful but as i've only had males message thats all i can base this on.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

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By *onestjohn1962Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

Decent, respectful and charming man here - missing out on fun because of a bunch of timewasting, ignorant and unintelligent ships anchors.

Completely agree !

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By *ristolanGuyMan
over a year ago

Bristol

I actually think this is where I struggle as a single man on here.

I think my messages may be bordering on being *too* polite to the extent that I may be boring people!

Even though I understand why everyone is on this site I find it particularly hard to talk to a stranger and opening up with someone white provocative.

I always thought a polite “hello how are you doing” followed by a little about myself, whilst not being crass, would do the trick but my messages always get deleted!

I don’t think I the nerve in me to then send someone a disgusting message because they said no/deleted. I’d be too embarrassed and ashamed!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agreed, the many idiot men on here make life difficult for men like me when messaging someone. The women on here can become cagey and also very cautious due to previous stalker like and aggressive behaviour of other members. It’s a shame.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s just their interpretation of what they think the site is like.

It just annoys me when women and couples then, and understandably, put a blanket ban on single males which then spoils it for the nice guys out there.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

I think the "decent" men are entirely unaffected by the minority of eejits. In fact it probably improves their chances as they stand out more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think the "decent" men are entirely unaffected by the minority of eejits. In fact it probably improves their chances as they stand out more. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because this is a swingers site. Did nobody tell you that when you sign up, you automatically want to fuck anyone and everyone, no questions asked?! Duhhhhh!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think the "decent" men are entirely unaffected by the minority of eejits. In fact it probably improves their chances as they stand out more. "

You say that, but some do block men, meaning they do all the choosing, but also meaning us pleasant fellas can’t introduce ourselves

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I actually think this is where I struggle as a single man on here.

I think my messages may be bordering on being *too* polite to the extent that I may be boring people!

Even though I understand why everyone is on this site I find it particularly hard to talk to a stranger and opening up with someone white provocative.

I always thought a polite “hello how are you doing” followed by a little about myself, whilst not being crass, would do the trick but my messages always get deleted!

I don’t think I the nerve in me to then send someone a disgusting message because they said no/deleted. I’d be too embarrassed and ashamed!

Did you read the OP and think she liked getting disgusting messages?

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

I think that it kind of makes it easier for the decent men to shine through.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/07/18 12:24:53]

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Absolutely agree OP.

I sometimes block single guys because I just want a break from the onslaught of crap. And almost all my meets have been single guys, and the ones I've met have mostly been wonderful people. But sometimes it's exhausting. Hi, I'm a person, please treat me like one?

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

It can be slightly time consuming, but the messages that you are referring to are a filter for me, I just know we are not compatible, and just quickly move on to the next message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think the "decent" men are entirely unaffected by the minority of eejits. In fact it probably improves their chances as they stand out more. "

That can also be the case actually. Sometimes I get a message back saying, wow that’s the first message I’ve had all day that wasn’t a ‘fancy a fuck’ message with a dick pic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think the "decent" men are entirely unaffected by the minority of eejits. In fact it probably improves their chances as they stand out more.

You say that, but some do block men, meaning they do all the choosing, but also meaning us pleasant fellas can’t introduce ourselves "

But, if they’re doing ‘all the choosing’ and they don’t message you, it most likely means they wouldn’t reply/would delete your message if you contacted them first anyway surely?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s just their interpretation of what they think the site is like.

It just annoys me when women and couples then, and understandably, put a blanket ban on single males which then spoils it for the nice guys out there. "

If we don't block men from messaging we get inundated with so many messages it's impossible to reply to them all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s life mate get on with it if you’ve got the character good sense of humour and know what you doing it will all come good

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By *ristolanGuyMan
over a year ago

Bristol

Did you read the OP and think she liked getting disgusting messages? "

Haha, no sorry I probably didn’t explain myself clearly. I almost (clearly I don’t) envy the men who have that level of confidence to think it’s OK sending messages like that.

Basically I took a very convoluted way to explain that I don’t think I have it in me to send crass messages to someone I don’t know or demand they drop what they’re doing to meet me.

But I find my politeness could also be a burden!

Note to self: articulate myself properly in future

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Because this is a swingers site. Did nobody tell you that when you sign up, you automatically want to fuck anyone and everyone, no questions asked?! Duhhhhh! "

Well that wasn't in the small print when i signed up! Damn and blast... how foolish am I to not know, best to stop moaning and just shag em all I guess!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s life mate get on with it if you’ve got the character good sense of humour and know what you doing it will all come good

Oh yeah. I think it’s hilarious when men send messages describing exactly what they want to do to me, borderline sexual abuse in the messages and when I tell them I’m not interested, get abuse and insults sent back. So funny, glad I have a brilliant sense of humour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because this is a swingers site. Did nobody tell you that when you sign up, you automatically want to fuck anyone and everyone, no questions asked?! Duhhhhh!

Well that wasn't in the small print when i signed up! Damn and blast... how foolish am I to not know, best to stop moaning and just shag em all I guess!!!

It’s in invisible ink

I honestly think that’s what some folk think swingers are. People who will fuck anyone and everyone!

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"It’s life mate get on with it if you’ve got the character good sense of humour and know what you doing it will all come good

+1. It's life when people are incompatible or someone isn't interested or misses your message. It's not just life to have lewd sexist abusive tripe hurled your way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s life mate get on with it if you’ve got the character good sense of humour and know what you doing it will all come good

+1. It's life when people are incompatible or someone isn't interested or misses your message. It's not just life to have lewd sexist abusive tripe hurled your way. "

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

Real men don't behave that way. End of...xxx

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By *andonmessMan
over a year ago

A world all of his own

It mirrors what's said in the chat rooms too. Clearly, some people think that because it's being said "virtually" that all sense of politeness/decency/call it what you will, goes straight out of the window.

I do genuinely cringe at some of the things I see in the chat rooms.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because this is a swingers site. Did nobody tell you that when you sign up, you automatically want to fuck anyone and everyone, no questions asked?! Duhhhhh! "

Lol

Those who only thinks with their testicals

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

Real men don't behave that way. End of...xxx"

What are they then? Lizards? Robots? Antelopes?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have had quite a few guys say that I've been the best conversation on here that most girls want to do sex chat. I think when they get that so often on here it's what they expect and they start the conversation off that way. I personally haven't had any abuse or much smut chat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s just their interpretation of what they think the site is like.

It just annoys me when women and couples then, and understandably, put a blanket ban on single males which then spoils it for the nice guys out there. "

I think it really is just down to interpretation. They assume swingers fuck anyone that asks.

Both of the nice guys on here are very different to all the 'not at all nice' guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Usually men have to charm and seduce their way into a woman's knickers. A site like this beckons to men with the appeal of not needing to bother with any of that... and many swingers will confirm that they can't be bothered with such things. So, by offering yourself on here, many men will assume you're basically a free prostitute, open for business to the nearest available bottle stopper

Don't worry though. There are a significant minority of us guys who genuinely love the slow delicious dance of seduction. You've just got to learn how to spot us

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have had quite a few guys say that I've been the best conversation on here that most girls want to do sex chat. I think when they get that so often on here it's what they expect and they start the conversation off that way. I personally haven't had any abuse or much smut chat

I'd bet my false teeth that the 'girls' wanting sex chat have cocks!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd bet my false teeth that the 'girls' wanting sex chat have cocks!"

Yep!

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

Real men don't behave that way. End of...xxx

What are they then? Lizards? Robots? Antelopes? "

Douchebags who never learned to properly engage with women

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By *osta del sol KinkytimesMan
over a year ago

Campanillas, Spain

I'm with some of the other guys in that I'm always polite when I msg someone and if my msg is deleted or ignored would never think of sending abuse. Though I can understand where women come from, to put us guys in the same boat as the idiots that are on here is unfair some of us are respectful, charming and will always treat a lady well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm with some of the other guys in that I'm always polite when I msg someone and if my msg is deleted or ignored would never think of sending abuse. Though I can understand where women come from, to put us guys in the same boat as the idiots that are on here is unfair some of us are respectful, charming and will always treat a lady well."

Nobody is putting you all in the same boat. We know there’s absolutely lovely men on fab who won’t be total cockwombles when messaging

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I quite like smutty chat. Once I've established that the person I'm talking to respects me and isn't just here to wank. I'm quite happy to get somewhat to the point in terms of what the site is for, but there are ways of doing that without being crass.

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"I quite like smutty chat. Once I've established that the person I'm talking to respects me and isn't just here to wank. I'm quite happy to get somewhat to the point in terms of what the site is for, but there are ways of doing that without being crass. "

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By *osta del sol KinkytimesMan
over a year ago

Campanillas, Spain

Nobody is putting you all in the same boat. We know there’s absolutely lovely men on fab who won’t be total cockwombles when messaging

Cockwomble! Do they pick up used condoms from dogging sites

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By *orkie321bWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

OP there are a lot of guys on fab like you describe but in amongst them are some really lovely chaps who know how to treat people with respect.

It's just a case of sorting the wheat from the chaff. Make good use of the block button - eventually you will whittle down the numbers and find the good guys.

If all the messages you receive get a bit too much use your filters. You can even block everyone from contacting you first and do the searching yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think the "decent" men are entirely unaffected by the minority of eejits. In fact it probably improves their chances as they stand out more.

You say that, but some do block men, meaning they do all the choosing, but also meaning us pleasant fellas can’t introduce ourselves

But, if they’re doing ‘all the choosing’ and they don’t message you, it most likely means they wouldn’t reply/would delete your message if you contacted them first anyway surely?"

Have you seen how many men are on this site? There’s not a chance they’ve looked at every one of them and every chance that a nice messages to them would grab their attention. Even when I search women and couples I keep seeing ones new to me who’ve been on 6 months or more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

I wholeheartedly apologise for my gender. I blame society and the media for the ingrained culture. We aren’t all like this.

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"I think the "decent" men are entirely unaffected by the minority of eejits. In fact it probably improves their chances as they stand out more. "

I keep hiding my profile because of the idiots.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd bet my false teeth that the 'girls' wanting sex chat have cocks!"

I should blooming well hope so! It's my universal indicator that a "woman" is a dude. That's one of the benefits of keeping things relatively vanilla (if flirtatious) when messaging. If the "woman" gets explicit or requests it... chances are she isn't a woman.

Warning: don't apply the above advice to all messages as some women genuinely are deliciously deranged sex perverts

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I’d like some direct and sexually explicit messages from ladies please.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A lot of men, and probably couples and single fems hate me because i rant a lot on my staus about idiotic men on fab. The decent guys are amazing, but the nasty little voys disguised as men are disgusting.. I have a very long profile but for a reason. I ask people to read it or not message. I get messages at 3am asking to meet right now. I can never meet at the dtop of my hat. And some of the language used to describe me or my lady parts is awful. Yes i show my body but that doesn't mean I'm just a slab of cheap neat to call what you like?

Sorry, I'm ranging again but i feel sorry for the decent folk on here who get a bad rep because of others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d like some direct and sexually explicit messages from ladies please. "

I just sent you one mate

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"I’d like some direct and sexually explicit messages from ladies please.

I just sent you one mate

What the fuck is a ‘botty foo-foo’?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

men cant win full stop ..reason's being there are simply too many on here to the ratio of couples and single fems and then they have to ''battle'' for attention like bees to the queen bee ..then they come into the forums to be constantly told how to act and behave and be told have robotic profiles to all look the same ....nah we say leave the men as they are it way easier to pick a meet that way.... just wish people would realise that the forums are not the ''rules'' to swinging when 98% of people on here don't use them.... and if we were to split all the % down there are in % the same amont of wrong uns in all groups..

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By *osta del sol KinkytimesMan
over a year ago

Campanillas, Spain

"A lot of men, and probably couples and single fems hate me because i rant a lot on my staus about idiotic men on fab. The decent guys are amazing, but the nasty little voys disguised as men are disgusting.. I have a very long profile but for a reason. I ask people to read it or not message. I get messages at 3am asking to meet right now. I can never meet at the dtop of my hat. And some of the language used to describe me or my lady parts is awful. Yes i show my body but that doesn't mean I'm just a slab of cheap neat to call what you like?

Sorry, I'm ranging again but i feel sorry for the decent folk on here who get a bad rep because of others."

I've seen your profile Mollie and sometimes feel for you with the abuse you get. Unfortunately not able to msg you as outside your range.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d like some direct and sexually explicit messages from ladies please.

I just sent you one mate

What the fuck is a ‘botty foo-foo’?!

Hey! Don't quote me out of context

The full line was "I want to dribble my hot bubbly clunge down your botty foo-foo like a miniature gauge choo-choo"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think u will find im a delight

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"I’d like some direct and sexually explicit messages from ladies please.

I just sent you one mate

What the fuck is a ‘botty foo-foo’?!

Hey! Don't quote me out of context

The full line was "I want to dribble my hot bubbly clunge down your botty foo-foo like a miniature gauge choo-choo"

Well, change the word ‘dribble’ to ‘missile launch rocket weapon’ and it’s a deal. Ps. Bring 3 women.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Unfortunately for every cockwomble I block, five seem to take their place. I also have a small select group of "block on sight" who seem to start new but otherwise identical profiles often (like one, it's more than once a week).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s life mate get on with it if you’ve got the character good sense of humour and know what you doing it will all come good

I think you’ve misunderstood my quote. Advice was to the op meaning just be yourself if you’ve got a good sense of humour and character it will show through eventually. Never once said it’s acceptable to send vulgar or abusive messages. And IMO what is the point. As if it’s going to get them somewhere. I’d sooner waste that time browsing for my next erotic encounter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d like some direct and sexually explicit messages from ladies please.

I just sent you one mate

What the fuck is a ‘botty foo-foo’?!

Hey! Don't quote me out of context

The full line was "I want to dribble my hot bubbly clunge down your botty foo-foo like a miniature gauge choo-choo"

Well, change the word ‘dribble’ to ‘missile launch rocket weapon’ and it’s a deal. Ps. Bring 3 women. "

And that was the moment when SoulfulKinky finally gave up on ever enjoying the attention of a woman on Fab and finally succumbed to the unceasing pressure to become "Fab straight"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did you read the OP and think she liked getting disgusting messages?

Haha, no sorry I probably didn’t explain myself clearly. I almost (clearly I don’t) envy the men who have that level of confidence to think it’s OK sending messages like that.

Basically I took a very convoluted way to explain that I don’t think I have it in me to send crass messages to someone I don’t know or demand they drop what they’re doing to meet me.

But I find my politeness could also be a burden!

Note to self: articulate myself properly in future

The majority of messages are deleted on here, if the women of the forums are anything to go by.

Keep writing how you want your personality to be portrayed; don't try to be someone else.

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By *ardiffCoupleNJCouple
over a year ago

Pontypridd/Rhyfelin

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

Solution: stick with us married men.....you get the choice, just the male, or both as a couple!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Looking at it from a different point you see a lot of couples and single females profiles saying.... I’m fine no need to ask or messages starting how are you, hi, you ok will be delete then there profile goes on to say what they want and what kind of person there looking for. So doesn’t really leave much to message about. Let’s say the guy is like the person they’ve described in there profile he has no need to tell them what he is like he’s after what she/ there after he can’t say hi or ask how they are so what is he meant to message. We’ve been on the scene many years and yes you do get some very rude men who think women who swing are pieces of meat. But then a lot of couples and single females treat men like shit so know wonder there starting to do the same. Like in clubs most clubs have Saturdays for couples and single females. Yet you see couples at the club Friday and all they do is moan about the men and make it clear there not interested in single guys well simple go the Saturday where there isn’t any men if your not comfortable being around them. Maybe if everyone on here was a bit more accepting of others it wouldn’t be as bad. Couples and females moan about the men straight men moan about bi men bi men moan about straight and gay men Everyone moaning about everyone.

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By *osta del sol KinkytimesMan
over a year ago

Campanillas, Spain

Did you read the OP and think she liked getting disgusting messages?

Haha, no sorry I probably didn’t explain myself clearly. I almost (clearly I don’t) envy the men who have that level of confidence to think it’s OK sending messages like that.

Basically I took a very convoluted way to explain that I don’t think I have it in me to send crass messages to someone I don’t know or demand they drop what they’re doing to meet me.

But I find my politeness could also be a burden!

Note to self: articulate myself properly in future

The majority of messages are deleted on here, if the women of the forums are anything to go by.

Keep writing how you want your personality to be portrayed; don't try to be someone else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm bored of the people who think that any of this is a competition. The men who will text any old crap. The men who think that somehow makes it harder for them.

If I put filters up, or hide my account, it means I don't want the messages. I've pulled the shutters down on my shop window, so while you're there banging your cock against it you're wasting your own time. Stop complaining about how others have caused it.

How about you just stop for a bit? I'd spend a lot more time seeking people out if my messages dried up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm bored of the people who think that any of this is a competition. The men who will text any old crap. The men who think that somehow makes it harder for them.

How about you just stop for a bit? I'd spend a lot more time seeking people out if my messages dried up."

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By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

I try not to moan .... about anything really ... love single men but I won’t reply if you send me a message that’s a one line Hey or something along the lines of I’m round the corner from you come round ... in real life would you males do this ... no so not here either ... there had to be rapport before meeting there are males on here I’ve bern speaking to for weeks and not yet met ... but then that’s what I go by and we are all different

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

It's a free site that has on it women open to casual sex and displaying pics of themselves in various states of undress.

Complaining that most men on the site think with their penises is like complaining water is wet.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I don't offer profile advice or talk about what messages to write as a way to stifle individuality or stop people doing as they please. I'm saying, I'm in your target market, this is the kind of thing I like. People are welcome to take or leave that advice.

As to the idea there's no middle ground between "hi how are you" and explicit (I didn't want to quote, it was getting too long), there's a world of middle ground. I like your profile because x, we have y in common, I think I have z to offer. Or something witty about my profile or status. There's no need to pick between dull as dishwater or crass.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

But surely when these pleps message you, you instantly block them?

If not you are doing the decent and respectful men of Fab a total disservice ..

It is up to you and you alone to separate the good from the bad and the ugly and tbh most of them don't use the forums anyway so its a wasted rant IMO

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

They're not single because they're nice guys who are great at relationships are they!?

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"It's a free site that has on it women open to casual sex and displaying pics of themselves in various states of undress.

Complaining that most men on the site think with their penises is like complaining water is wet. "

I don't have pictures of myself on my profile and I still get these messages.

I also say in my profile (when it's unhidden) that I'm not looking for casual sex. I'm looking for a regular fwb.

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"I don't offer profile advice or talk about what messages to write as a way to stifle individuality or stop people doing as they please. I'm saying, I'm in your target market, this is the kind of thing I like. People are welcome to take or leave that advice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

I've had that from a few single guys. One wrote back "respect you and your profile wishes?? Hahaha this is a swing site love".

Right ok firstly this isn't just a swing site and just because a single woman is on a site like this, doesn't mean we shouldn't be spoken too without respect and have our profile wishes (for our bodies) disregarded.

It's a real shame because single guys are now all I'm looking for. I haven't had sex in a year (yes really) due to how awful alot are towards single women. Sure I have a life off here but still the way some guys message or have as their status really turns me off.

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By *ittlevixenWoman
over a year ago

Mold North Wales

"I think the "decent" men are entirely unaffected by the minority of eejits. In fact it probably improves their chances as they stand out more. "

I agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

Where not all like you know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There maybe a middle ground but then take into account all the status saying bulk delete how many have done a well thought out message to them just to be added to bulk delete. As a couple we hear things from couples and single females about how they treat/ think of single guys so it’s no wonder single guys are like they are. Not saying it’s right and not saying all of the ones that are rude or think women are a piece of meat are hard done to but single guys have a hard time from couples and single females. Again there’s filters so if the messages someone is getting isn’t to there likening block single guys and search for there own. There’s ways around everything instead of all the forum post moaning about others. Again most of the people on here don’t even use the forums so chances are the ones doing the vile messaging don’t see these posts anyway.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I'm proactive on my own profile and I'm happy with how it is. For those who look, they might get an insight into how to do Fab in a way that might work better for everyone (which would benefit everyone). I certainly came to the forums to get a sense of how other people do things.

I don't treat single guys like dirt or disrespect them (except employing plenty of "delete without reply means no thank you"). I discuss the issues, and I know I've been helped by knowing it's not just me. As to being disheartened by deletions... that's just the way it goes? If Fab hadn't been to my liking I would have changed my approach and/or left. And I know it's easy to say as a so called unicorn. But I also say it as someone who has almost no luck outside the swinging scene. I was sad about it, but I never took it out on anyone else or demanded they changed. I looked to myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP I think this is what we need to do.... piss people off. If we piss them off en mass maybe the idiots will go away and the site will return to the fun and quality it used to be.

I just get so fed up with crass and downright rude messages that I just delete everyone 9/10 now. I’ve even deleted all my pics and my profile text and yet I still get the crap messages ffs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never said you did or didn’t I was talking generally. And like I also said I’m not saying there right in there approach but reading many forum post it seems that the guys can’t do right from wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guys can do right if they are polite and send a well thought out message.

If it gets deleted it means the woman isn’t interested, what’s wrong with that?!

Just because someone sends a polite message it doesn’t mean they are suddenly entitled to a reply. If people are so butthurt with having their messages deleted maybe they should stop sending them and make the women come to them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a free site that has on it women open to casual sex and displaying pics of themselves in various states of undress.

Complaining that most men on the site think with their penises is like complaining water is wet. "

So.... we're asking for it?

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By *xycpl699Couple
over a year ago

kilmarnock

we have blocked men on filters if we want fun with any we prefer look ourselves. much less hassle. hollie

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"It's a free site that has on it women open to casual sex and displaying pics of themselves in various states of undress.

Complaining that most men on the site think with their penises is like complaining water is wet.

So.... we're asking for it? "

It's also an answer to "women never answer messages". Maybe if (some) men had a wank then messaged people, then women would get less crap *and* men would have more luck. Win win?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree OP.

I hide my profile for hours every single day just so I can wade through all the messages I get. Delete the ones I’m not interested in and reply to the ones I am.

What also annoys me is when I’ve deleted a message and the guy sends another two or three begging or asking why, that adds to the message count and it’s just desperate.

My pet hate is the long mills & boon messages full of what they’d like to do to me, I roll my eyes and delete. There is never any need to send such an explicit message to someone you’ve never spoken to before. Or the “I wanna fuck u tonight” I wish some would be a little (a lot) more creative!

I took time with my profile and made it very detailed but short so any guy who’s interested knows what I want. If the guy mentions something that is in my profile, I think it’s a nice touch and I may reply if he’s what I’m looking for.

A polite message doesn’t guarantee a reply either that’s what Fab is all about. We have a choice, some don’t like the fact we have a choice, but that’s the way it is and they need to get used to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I’m really bored I’ll reply to the ‘this is what we’re going to do’ messages with spelling corrections and grammar corrections. Usually they’ve copied and pasted their message and added random little bits too it, and it’s awful.

Or I point out why we won’t be doing this

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"If I’m really bored I’ll reply to the ‘this is what we’re going to do’ messages with spelling corrections and grammar corrections. Usually they’ve copied and pasted their message and added random little bits too it, and it’s awful.

Or I point out why we won’t be doing this

When I was injured and out of action (but very new to Fab) I got a lot of messages telling me that I was doing Fab wrong looking for sympathy. (I wasn't. I was looking now for meet later, but upfront about my current unavailability. It seemed the most reasonable thing to do) I did exactly the same thing. I sent corrections.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guys can do right if they are polite and send a well thought out message.

If it gets deleted it means the woman isn’t interested, what’s wrong with that?!

Who said anything about polite message the post was about rude messages. If people are butthurt about getting message from guys then maybe block men and go looking for them themselves works both ways really doesn’t it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

"
yes decent respectful and charming man here

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By *ornCouple
over a year ago

Sedgemoor

"I actually think this is where I struggle as a single man on here.

I think my messages may be bordering on being *too* polite to the extent that I may be boring people!

Even though I understand why everyone is on this site I find it particularly hard to talk to a stranger and opening up with someone white provocative.

I always thought a polite “hello how are you doing” followed by a little about myself, whilst not being crass, would do the trick but my messages always get deleted!

I don’t think I the nerve in me to then send someone a disgusting message because they said no/deleted. I’d be too embarrassed and ashamed!

I wouldn't know. If you block all males you are also blocking couples, half of whom are probably female

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

I think you’ll find that generally the internet and the nature of the beast allows for all the pond life to flourish under the shade of anonymity

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guys can do right if they are polite and send a well thought out message.

If it gets deleted it means the woman isn’t interested, what’s wrong with that?!

Lol.

It’s very different. Being sent abuse because you said no thanks or you didn’t reply is very different to having a strop because you sent someone a message and they didn’t reply back.

I personally hide my p

e several times a day to minimise the influx.

The block button works great for me so there’s no need for me to block all single guys. But no doubt if we all did that, people like you would find an issue with that also.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

I think you’ll find that generally the internet and the nature of the beast allows for all the pond life to flourish under the shade of anonymity "

Very true.

It’s the only place they can be completely anonymous and say the most disgusting things without any repercussions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They are desperate, so you must be too? Haha

I just block them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a novel idea........

Women who don’t like receiving crude messages from men please block them...

That way you can contact someone you fancy....

I’m straight and receive messages from men every day offering to suck me off....

Since blocking single men my inbox has become a lepper colony...

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

I think you’ll find that generally the internet and the nature of the beast allows for all the pond life to flourish under the shade of anonymity

Very true.

It’s the only place they can be completely anonymous and say the most disgusting things without any repercussions. "

In essence it’s quite sad on reflection . I like to give the benefit of the doubt and just think those that are rude are just stressed with no other outlet other than a screen a keyboard and a easy target at the other end ... Hasn’t the world evolved

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

I think you’ll find that generally the internet and the nature of the beast allows for all the pond life to flourish under the shade of anonymity

Very true.

It’s the only place they can be completely anonymous and say the most disgusting things without any repercussions.

Hahaha.

I do the same, I think, maybe they’ve had a bad day, or they need to take their anger out on someone! Doesn’t stop me blocking them!

It is baffling though, that there are grown adults out there who send abuse or insulting messages to random people for no reason... crazy!

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By *emel9Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

I have been on this site from almost the start, yes many many many years, and have seen it change a lot in that time.

It is a sad fact that there are people with no respect or good manners when messaging people, regardless of whether they are female, male, or a couple, but sadly these are the people that can also be behind you at the Tesco checkout. Some people are just rude and crude.

I don't think it affects me as a single guy on here. I've modified the way my swinging life works over time. I'm lucky enough to have time for group social events, where you meet decent people that are not timewasters.

I still message people on here with very polite messages that are not crude at all. The vast majority get deleted without a reply. Why? because couples and single ladies get 100's of messages and if I don't float their boat they simply don't have time to reply.

That's just Fablife

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Iv changed my mind some of us are sound as a pound but the odd few are wierdo cock blocking numptys who cant take no for an answer go get a grip of your lifes you crazy fruit loop muppets and stay out of us real mens way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

I agree that a lot of men spoil it for the others. Thankfully it hasn’t seemed to spoil it too much for me. I believe in manners and it seems to work.

But in saying that with the ratio of men on here I’ve found a lot of ladies to take offence and be quite rude from the off. I suppose they can be with having the pick of the bunch.

I think it would be very interesting if it was 50/50 on this site how people go about their business

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guys can do right if they are polite and send a well thought out message.

If it gets deleted it means the woman isn’t interested, what’s wrong with that?!

Lol.

It’s very different. Being sent abuse because you said no thanks or you didn’t reply is very different to having a strop because you sent someone a message and they didn’t reply back.

I personally hide my p

e several times a day to minimise the influx.

The block button works great for me so there’s no need for me to block all single guys. But no doubt if we all did that, people like you would find an issue with that also. "

Lol so your allowed your opinion but if anyone else has one that’s different then it’s them with a issue

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

I think you’ll find that generally the internet and the nature of the beast allows for all the pond life to flourish under the shade of anonymity

Very true.

It’s the only place they can be completely anonymous and say the most disgusting things without any repercussions.

Hahaha.

I do the same, I think, maybe they’ve had a bad day, or they need to take their anger out on someone! Doesn’t stop me blocking them!

It is baffling though, that there are grown adults out there who send abuse or insulting messages to random people for no reason... crazy! "

There are certainly some people (not anyone on this thread, it's not personal) who, if I stopped to think about it, I'd wonder how they managed to tie their own shoelaces, with some of the nonsense I get. (I do just block them)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guys can do right if they are polite and send a well thought out message.

If it gets deleted it means the woman isn’t interested, what’s wrong with that?!

Lol.

It’s very different. Being sent abuse because you said no thanks or you didn’t reply is very different to having a strop because you sent someone a message and they didn’t reply back.

I personally hide my p

e several times a day to minimise the influx.

The block button works great for me so there’s no need for me to block all single guys. But no doubt if we all did that, people like you would find an issue with that also.

Lol so your allowed your opinion but if anyone else has one that’s different then it’s them with a issue

If that’s what you took from my post then feel free to believe that.

You seem a little riled up, I’d have assumed you were a single man if you’re profile didn’t say “couple”.

It isn’t the case, and I find it quite funny you came to that conclusion!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

I think you’ll find that generally the internet and the nature of the beast allows for all the pond life to flourish under the shade of anonymity

Very true.

It’s the only place they can be completely anonymous and say the most disgusting things without any repercussions.

Hahaha.

I do the same, I think, maybe they’ve had a bad day, or they need to take their anger out on someone! Doesn’t stop me blocking them!

It is baffling though, that there are grown adults out there who send abuse or insulting messages to random people for no reason... crazy!

For this reason I only use Velcro shoes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At least you get the option to block all single men - we don't get that luxury when we're fed up of all the crass FAF messages and endless vaj pictures.

Sick of it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a free site that has on it women open to casual sex and displaying pics of themselves in various states of undress.

Complaining that most men on the site think with their penises is like complaining water is wet. "

Says it all

I'd expect a teenager to say something like that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

I think you’ll find that generally the internet and the nature of the beast allows for all the pond life to flourish under the shade of anonymity

Very true.

It’s the only place they can be completely anonymous and say the most disgusting things without any repercussions.

Hahaha.

I do the same, I think, maybe they’ve had a bad day, or they need to take their anger out on someone! Doesn’t stop me blocking them!

It is baffling though, that there are grown adults out there who send abuse or insulting messages to random people for no reason... crazy!

Hahaha same here!

However we are nice enough people to not feel the need to say it to them or send a nasty message back. A block is good enough for me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"At least you get the option to block all single men - we don't get that luxury when we're fed up of all the crass FAF messages and endless vaj pictures.

Sick of it."

Oh man.

Poor you! Must be terrible!

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

And the award for today's single guy bashing thread goes to....

The site provides tools that would alleviate all of your crass unintelligent demeaning, nasty rude (have I missed any) messages.. in message filters it enables anyone to block messages from those genders and demographics they don't wish to receive messages from.. it's your choice to use them or not.. if I was affected to such an extent it was causing me angst and stress that I had to rant I'd use the tools at my disposal to relieve that.. maybe that's too easy ..too simple to achieve you'd not spoil your friday...so here's another reason as your inbox will be quieter....you can be proactive.. search yourself.. after all you know better than anyone who you seek... you could then send the intelligent message to those that appeal.. without being cdemening crass nasty and rude ..

The site provides stats not long ago less than 1% of the sites users post in the forums I'm sure many more read them, however the guys you reference a) likely don't read the forums b) they'd not recognise the description as one that applied to them.

As for the guys saying ..ooooh not me not me and blaming others for your lack of perceived lack of success you might want to look closer to home..

I'll copy and paste this likely tomorroww gem the next lady posts the same rant .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Truth is as well, lots of the "single" men on here aren't and when you question if they are really attached/married say "does it matter?"

I'm not saying being married is wrong, its hiding it until asked that peeves me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"At least you get the option to block all single men - we don't get that luxury when we're fed up of all the crass FAF messages and endless vaj pictures.

Sick of it."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have messaged a few women on here just to say that the pictures they have posted are incredibly erotic and how fantastic they look in the pictures. Also added that we are too far away from each other so not trying my luck or anything just paying them a compliment. Or at least that is what i thought i was doing.

Some reply saying thank you and good luck others just delete and some reply saying, basically, sod off.

All of which i take in my stride and move on.

I have never understood the idea that a crass rude messahe would work on any women that i would want to meet. If it did i dont think i would want to meet them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"At least you get the option to block all single men - we don't get that luxury when we're fed up of all the crass FAF messages and endless vaj pictures.

Sick of it."

I really feel for you.

It must be horrendous.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/07/18 14:54:31]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Truth is as well, lots of the "single" men on here aren't and when you question if they are really attached/married say "does it matter?"

I'm not saying being married is wrong, its hiding it until asked that peeves me

Yes I hate this.

I personally would only like to meet unattached males but I get that some will lie and I’ll never know.

However I’d rather someone be honest, I’ve asked before and got the “does it matter” or the “yes I am but she knows” and I don’t believe them. I don’t want to be meeting a married men who’s wife doesn’t know he is playing away, and run the risk of her finding out and messaging me!

I’ve seen something similar on here already!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

And the award for today's single guy bashing thread goes to....

As for the guys saying ..ooooh not me not me and blaming others for your lack of perceived lack of success you might want to look closer to home..

I'll copy and paste this likely tomorroww gem the next lady posts the same rant .

Just the point I was trying to make but then got told I have a issue with people lol

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

'No Drama'

Your post seems a bit dramatic.

Us blokes get tarred with the shitty brush and I'm not saying you have done that to us here.

We can send long and thoughtful messages in the hope to impress and find it unread and deleted.

So what's the point in that?

Might as well say it as we see it and get that unread and deleted instead

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A while back I would have stuck up for men, single and those on MM couple profiles but the past year I have endured more abuse, rudeness and just plain ignorance than I have in the other 5 years I've been on here!

It's ridiculous, I am doing the usual report and block but they're still here on same profiles and in some cases still dishing out the same if not worse nastiness because I've spotted one or two being named n shamed on female profiles and in forum x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Truth is as well, lots of the "single" men on here aren't and when you question if they are really attached/married say "does it matter?"

I'm not saying being married is wrong, its hiding it until asked that peeves me

Yes I hate this.

I personally would only like to meet unattached males but I get that some will lie and I’ll never know.

I’ve seen something similar on here already!

Now that is something we can agree on. We hate cheaters also

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I thought it was Friday.

OP It's an open forum I will defend your right to rant whatever the day. However fab provides solutions to allow you to operate your profile your way. Perhaps then there would be less need for ranty?

There are many types of people here all are unique. None are perfect. If they don't match your requirements then you don't have to interact with them.

If a guy had posted this thread I think by now he may have bed lynched by the usual fab forum collective response.

Anger creates anger, hate creates hate, sometimes even ranty creates more ranty. What we give out we often get back.

And yes I'm a single guy on fab, having read your rant, I know I would never contact you. But then i rarely message anyone first any way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

'No Drama'

Your post seems a bit dramatic.

Us blokes get tarred with the shitty brush and I'm not saying you have done that to us here.

We can send long and thoughtful messages in the hope to impress and find it unread and deleted.

So what's the point in that?

Might as well say it as we see it and get that unread and deleted instead"

Or you could be yourself...

And if she deletes then you move onto someone else. Not the end of the world is it?

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By *D04Couple
over a year ago

Leigh

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

'No Drama'

Your post seems a bit dramatic.

Us blokes get tarred with the shitty brush and I'm not saying you have done that to us here.

We can send long and thoughtful messages in the hope to impress and find it unread and deleted.

So what's the point in that?

Might as well say it as we see it and get that unread and deleted instead"

So you going tarr all couples and single females with the same brush and assume we all delete messages without replying?

If youve read our profile and show us that you have done then you will always get a reply even if it is a no. But the moment you start sending sleezy messages with no thought... you will get deleted every day of the week.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Truth is as well, lots of the "single" men on here aren't and when you question if they are really attached/married say "does it matter?"

I'm not saying being married is wrong, its hiding it until asked that peeves me

Yes I hate this.

I personally would only like to meet unattached males but I get that some will lie and I’ll never know.

I’ve seen something similar on here already!

Now that is something we can agree on. We hate cheaters also "

I just wish more would be honest.

Surely we are all entitled to our preferences right? So I don’t see why married men on single men profiles should lie, when I’m sure there’s women out there who don’t care for their marital status.

I like no drama, so single men only for me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

'No Drama'

Your post seems a bit dramatic.

Us blokes get tarred with the shitty brush and I'm not saying you have done that to us here.

We can send long and thoughtful messages in the hope to impress and find it unread and deleted.

So what's the point in that?

Might as well say it as we see it and get that unread and deleted instead

So you going tarr all couples and single females with the same brush and assume we all delete messages without replying?

Ok a question I keep reading about unread messages getting deleted. How do you know if it was delete without being read? Genuine question does it show that in sent messages?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A while back I would have stuck up for men, single and those on MM couple profiles but the past year I have endured more abuse, rudeness and just plain ignorance than I have in the other 5 years I've been on here!

So if you were attacked by dog every time you walked to the bus stop on the Main Street?

Would you take a different route or continue to walk on Main Street hoping the dog has died?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Truth is as well, lots of the "single" men on here aren't and when you question if they are really attached/married say "does it matter?"

I'm not saying being married is wrong, its hiding it until asked that peeves me

Yes I hate this.

I personally would only like to meet unattached males but I get that some will lie and I’ll never know.

I’ve seen something similar on here already!

Now that is something we can agree on. We hate cheaters also

I just wish more would be honest.

I like no drama, so single men only for me!

Playing the numbers game same as bi people saying there straight or smokers saying there none smokers. Probably half the people we meet in clubs who smoke are down as none smokers on here lol.

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

'No Drama'

Your post seems a bit dramatic.

Us blokes get tarred with the shitty brush and I'm not saying you have done that to us here.

We can send long and thoughtful messages in the hope to impress and find it unread and deleted.

So what's the point in that?

Might as well say it as we see it and get that unread and deleted instead

So you going tarr all couples and single females with the same brush and assume we all delete messages without replying?

Ok a question I keep reading about unread messages getting deleted. How do you know if it was delete without being read? Genuine question does it show that in sent messages? "

Yes and it usually follows up with a block.

None taken on that as it does both parties a favour with the block.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So if you were attacked by dog every time you walked to the bus stop on the Main Street?

Would you take a different route or continue to walk on Main Street hoping the dog has died? "

Same route I’d just take my shot gun

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

Block guys from messaging it really is that simple...m it's in message filters ..control the controllable... or you can continue as you are.

Einstein said "to do the same thing over and over again and expect a different result is a definition of insanity"

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

I think the trouble is that *some* men see "sex site" or "swingers site" and immediately jump to the conclusion that that is ALL it's about without actually understanding that there is a lot more to it than that - that whilst NSA meets (of whatever flavour) are at it's heart, they're not an immediate guarantee just for setting up a profile, posting a couple of lines of crude text and a pic of your cock.

When those immediate meets don't happen, frustration kicks in and rather than taking a look at themselves and realising their approach needs changing, the majority take the opposite tack and get more negative and crude, which leads to more frustration and them ultimately blaming everyone but themselves for their lack of "success".

On the flip side of that you have the single ladies and couples who get frustrated with the crude approaches from *some* men and batten down the hatches in one way or another, that then leads to further frustration from the single men and so the vicious circle continues.

In the meantime a lot of people (men, women and couples) just carry on going about their Fab business quietly, having a lot of fun and making the most of the site and what it has to offer.

Unfortunately, as is the way with news generally you don't tend to hear as much of the good news and the success stories because it's drowned out by the bad news and people (from both sides) calling out the bad things.

Sadly there's no easy way to change that - there will always be the bad eggs and those that are vile and abusive, or who moan about their lack of "luck" on here without actually taking the time to stop and think about why that might be and doing something about it, and there will always be those who think hiding behind a keyboard being abusive is acceptable - it ultimately comes down to how we as individuals deal with that.

Personally whilst I will contribute to threads like this, and often do, quite vocally at times, I prefer to go about my own personal Fab business quietly and worry about that ahead of anything else. I certainly don't see myself as being in competition with anyone, nor do I think anyone has ruined my experience of the site by their actions, the only person that can ruin my experience is me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Block guys from messaging it really is that simple...m it's in message filters ..control the controllable... or you can continue as you are.

Einstein said "to do the same thing over and over again and expect a different result is a definition of insanity"

I won’t be blocking all single guys as I won’t ruin it for the genuine ones.

A block and a delete is far easier for me and does the job, even if my block list ends up in the hundreds.

I personally don’t think it’s fair to punish ALL guys for the actions of some.

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By *r_PinkMan
over a year ago

london stratford

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

Im not a sleezebag!

but I am a kinky pervert

xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Block guys from messaging it really is that simple...m it's in message filters ..control the controllable... or you can continue as you are.

Einstein said "to do the same thing over and over again and expect a different result is a definition of insanity"

Why should I?? I'm not the one sending abusive messages!! Maybe the men in question should stop sending them!! Why should polite people put filters up to the max, if every female done that the genuine men wouldn't be able to message any women.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Block guys from messaging it really is that simple...m it's in message filters ..control the controllable... or you can continue as you are.

Einstein said "to do the same thing over and over again and expect a different result is a definition of insanity"

I won’t be blocking all single guys as I won’t ruin it for the genuine ones.

A block and a delete is far easier for me and does the job, even if my block list ends up in the hundreds.

I personally don’t think it’s fair to punish ALL guys for the actions of some. "

Exactly

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

"I'm probably going to piss many off with this post, but here goes.

Such a shame for the decent respecful charming men that may miss out because of the actions of many.

Rant over and lets commence with enjoying my friday.

I think you’ll find that generally the internet and the nature of the beast allows for all the pond life to flourish under the shade of anonymity

Very true.

It’s the only place they can be completely anonymous and say the most disgusting things without any repercussions.

Hahaha.

I do the same, I think, maybe they’ve had a bad day, or they need to take their anger out on someone! Doesn’t stop me blocking them!

It is baffling though, that there are grown adults out there who send abuse or insulting messages to random people for no reason... crazy! "

Wouldn’t it be cool if you could send electric shock by keyboard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So if you were attacked by dog every time you walked to the bus stop on the Main Street?

Would you take a different route or continue to walk on Main Street hoping the dog has died? "

Why should every man be blocked by filters for a few rude ones, if all females done that the genuine men wouldn't be able to message anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Block guys from messaging it really is that simple...m it's in message filters ..control the controllable... or you can continue as you are.

Einstein said "to do the same thing over and over again and expect a different result is a definition of insanity"

I agree.

If all of us who get abusive messages blocked all single guys you’d no doubt see forum posts such as “Why block single guys if you’re looking for them” “Why do so many women block single guys” and so on.

The problem lies with the abusive trolls not us, and by blocking them we are sorting it. If guys got abusive messages from women regularly, how many of them would block all single women? I don’t think there would be many.

I’d much rather block and report and give the genuine guys a chance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just accept that there is a certain type of man that assumes that is the done thing and then just ignore, ignore,ignore. Messages are easy enough to skim read without opening. I dont have filters so get a few messages but even with the vast amount of ignoring I do, the 'good ones' can still shine through. The idiot messages dont impare my ability or desire to speak to decent people.

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

Block guys from messaging it really is that simple...m it's in message filters ..control the controllable... or you can continue as you are.

Einstein said "to do the same thing over and over again and expect a different result is a definition of insanity"

I won’t be blocking all single guys as I won’t ruin it for the genuine ones.

A block and a delete is far easier for me and does the job, even if my block list ends up in the hundreds.

I personally don’t think it’s fair to punish ALL guys for the actions of some.

Exactly

You're not punishing All guys.. you could still message the 'genuine ones'.. its one of the reasons I suggest all folk have the best profile they can that way 'proactive folk' will find them.

Your choice .. carry on as you are makes zero difference to me I'm not the one complaining guys are sending me abuse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Block guys from messaging it really is that simple...m it's in message filters ..control the controllable... or you can continue as you are.

Einstein said "to do the same thing over and over again and expect a different result is a definition of insanity"

I won’t be blocking all single guys as I won’t ruin it for the genuine ones.

A block and a delete is far easier for me and does the job, even if my block list ends up in the hundreds.

I personally don’t think it’s fair to punish ALL guys for the actions of some.

Exactly

You're not punishing All guys.. you could still message the 'genuine ones'.. its one of the reasons I suggest all folk have the best profile they can that way 'proactive folk' will find them.

Your choice .. carry on as you are makes zero difference to me I'm not the one complaining guys are sending me abuse. "

Yes it is punishing all guys.

Of course we can message the genuine ones but what’s to say we won’t miss someone who may be for us? Or bypass their profile as one looks more appealing? Whereas if they message we can take a good look and get a vibe from the messsge the send.

No one is complaining that *guys* are sending abuse as a whole. We are statingg SOME who either get politely rejected, have their message deleted or decide to just be a prat are sending abuse. Does it affect my time here? No, as the block button works perfectly well.

I’m sure most of us are able to make the best decision for ourselves on how we want to use this site without the help of others. I’m doing just fine personally.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You know something the forums are a odd place....

If I started a thread stating why are bi/gay guy’s messaging me daily with crude messages...

100% of the replies would be to block single men. Problem solved

A woman starts a thread about rude messages from single men.

Men start apologizing for other men and women stating they shouldn’t block single men because that will ruin it for the good guys...

Can someone please explain why different advice is given for different genders for the same problems?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You know something the forums are a odd place....

If I started a thread stating why are bi/gay guy’s messaging me daily with crude messages...

100% of the replies would be to block single men. Problem solved

A woman starts a thread about rude messages from single men.

Men start apologizing for other men and women stating they shouldn’t block single men because that will ruin it for the good guys...

Can someone please explain why different advice is given for different genders for the same problems? "

I think 'ruining it for the good guys' should be a banned phrase on here

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I have a lot of success here. But I'm not sure why I should have to change what's working for me. Why should the people getting abusive messages have to change? Raising my filters would make Fab harder to use. Posting erotic pictures on Fab isn't asking for abuse or lack of consideration, it's asking at most for attention. Why should my response to abuse to be to coddle men and their hurt feelings or to be nice or give people a chance? Then I'd be asking for it when something horrible happened, I'm sure. But I'm also a bitch for having firm boundaries and deleting messages.

So it's women's fault we get abusive messages from (mostly) men*. But why is Fab such a sausage fest and where are all the genuine ladies who actually meet?

* In my time here I've had maybe five abusive messages from couples, possibly one from a woman, and more than I'd be able to estimate from men. Thousands I'd guess.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

"You know something the forums are a odd place....

If I started a thread stating why are bi/gay guy’s messaging me daily with crude messages...

100% of the replies would be to block single men. Problem solved

A woman starts a thread about rude messages from single men.

Men start apologizing for other men and women stating they shouldn’t block single men because that will ruin it for the good guys...

Can someone please explain why different advice is given for different genders for the same problems? "

In that specific instance there's a very valid reason for the difference in response - if you're straight and not looking to meet single men then blocking ALL men would be one way to stop that.

However if you're a woman who IS looking to meet single men, blocking ALL men doesn't solve the issue

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"You know something the forums are a odd place....

If I started a thread stating why are bi/gay guy’s messaging me daily with crude messages...

100% of the replies would be to block single men. Problem solved

A woman starts a thread about rude messages from single men.

Men start apologizing for other men and women stating they shouldn’t block single men because that will ruin it for the good guys...

Can someone please explain why different advice is given for different genders for the same problems? "

Because the guys complaining about men messaging them aren't trying to meet men. The women who complain are. Different problems.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You know something the forums are a odd place....

If I started a thread stating why are bi/gay guy’s messaging me daily with crude messages...

100% of the replies would be to block single men. Problem solved

A woman starts a thread about rude messages from single men.

Men start apologizing for other men and women stating they shouldn’t block single men because that will ruin it for the good guys...

Can someone please explain why different advice is given for different genders for the same problems? "

Different people give different advice. I thought everyone knew that?

I wouldn’t be telling anyone to block “all” of anything if that’s what they’re looking for.

If a straight man is getting messages from bi or gay guys then it would be best for him to block all men if he isn’t looking for men.

If a straight woman is getting messages from bi or lesbian women then it would be best for her to block all women if she isn’t looking for women.

If a straight woman/straight man is getting abusive messages from straight men/straight women. It’s best they block the ones causing an issue and leave it open for the rest. That’s the difference.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You know something the forums are a odd place....

If I started a thread stating why are bi/gay guy’s messaging me daily with crude messages...

100% of the replies would be to block single men. Problem solved

A woman starts a thread about rude messages from single men.

Men start apologizing for other men and women stating they shouldn’t block single men because that will ruin it for the good guys...

Can someone please explain why different advice is given for different genders for the same problems?

In that specific instance there's a very valid reason for the difference in response - if you're straight and not looking to meet single men then blocking ALL men would be one way to stop that.

However if you're a woman who IS looking to meet single men, blocking ALL men doesn't solve the issue "

Just seen this. You explained it better than I did lol!

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

So it's women's fault we get abusive messages from (mostly) men*. But why is Fab such a sausage fest and where are all the genuine ladies who actually meet?

Please show me who said its a women's fault ..seriously please do.. you're offered a solution to a problem you ladies are having..with the excuse I might miss out on the guy.. well maybe that guy won't message you either or maybe that guys message is lost in the volume of mail.. if you choose not to use that solution as I said ^^^^up there makes zero difference to me.. I also said if the abuse was causing me enough angst and stress to post a thread about it I'd change what I could to alleviate that...or

I can do

1) nothing and keep complaining

2) hope that every guy who might send an abusive message reads my posts and changes their behaviour

3. I take control of what I can control

There's a few ladies on here who have chosen option 1. With a big dollop of option 2 ...Entirely their choice..

if a lady has read this thread and decided to take option 3 control what she can to reduce the angst ..all power to her

Same moans and complaints from some folk ..just a different day

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By *arlo82Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places

I've given up with single men. I post a meet I get nothing. When I say I've given up i get abuse that I'm fake and a time waster

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You know something the forums are a odd place....

If I started a thread stating why are bi/gay guy’s messaging me daily with crude messages...

100% of the replies would be to block single men. Problem solved

A woman starts a thread about rude messages from single men.

Men start apologizing for other men and women stating they shouldn’t block single men because that will ruin it for the good guys...

Can someone please explain why different advice is given for different genders for the same problems? "

If you're straight then yes I'd say block men but if you're bi or gay why should you block them

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Response to 2good because the html is messed up. There's a post above about what do you expect that men think with their penises, for example. But the solutions proposed are all on the women. I do the things that seem to work best for me, but it's an awkward compromise in many cases.

How about guys start clearing their own houses and taking a look at attitudes towards (sexually available) women rather than expecting women to change because they're being abused? How about challenging sexism where you find it? How about accepting that we put up with this crap rather than creating an environment where it's difficult for women to thrive and then complaining about the lack of women?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Response to 2good because the html is messed up. There's a post above about what do you expect that men think with their penises, for example. But the solutions proposed are all on the women. I do the things that seem to work best for me, but it's an awkward compromise in many cases.

" Inequality promises that its here to stay

Always trust the injustice, cos its not going away"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've found some right lovely single men!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My personal take is that some guys get frustrated/annoyed by constant rejection/being ignored that they revert back to type. They know that the majority of their message will not get a reply so they think what the hell, I might as well be a prick, I'm not going to get anywhere anyway.

Just my thoughts on the subject.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think the "decent" men are entirely unaffected by the minority of eejits. In fact it probably improves their chances as they stand out more. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So it's women's fault we get abusive messages from (mostly) men*. But why is Fab such a sausage fest and where are all the genuine ladies who actually meet?

I can do

1) nothing and keep complaining

2) hope that every guy who might send an abusive message reads my posts and changes their behaviour

3. I take control of what I can control

There's a few ladies on here who have chosen option 1. With a big dollop of option 2 ...Entirely their choice..

if a lady has read this thread and decided to take option 3 control what she can to reduce the angst ..all power to her

Same moans and complaints from some folk ..just a different day "

But you’re here complaining about women complaining.

If you don’t like thread why not find one you do?

I’m certainly not complaining, but I’m well within my rights to reply to a thread like this with my experience. It doesn’t affect my time on this site and it certainly doesn’t bring me stress as they aren’t that special to bother me.

I block them and move on. Other women probably do different. Surely if it isn’t affecting you, it’s shouldn’t be riling you up? That’s the vibe I’m getting.

If I don’t like a thread, I move onto one I do. I really don’t see any positive in moaning about other people “moaning”.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think the "decent" men are entirely unaffected by the minority of eejits. In fact it probably improves their chances as they stand out more.

I agree with this.

Genuine men with a bit about them stand out massively. So I don’t think the genuine nice single men are affected at all personally.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or you could be yourself...

And if she deletes then you move onto someone else. Not the end of the world is it?"

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Maybe hire a secretary to review and filter the messages so you only get the quality ones?

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By *uzzy NavelWoman
over a year ago

so near and yet so far....

"Agreed, the many idiot men on here make life difficult for men like me when messaging someone. The women on here can become cagey and also very cautious due to previous stalker like and aggressive behaviour of other members. It’s a shame."

Tbf, when we do get an interesting and polite message it does restore our faith in mankind....

Ladies can see the wheat from the chaff xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve found a great way to stop the majority of idiots messaging: meet a TV, show the veri and make it clear at the top of your profile that you meet TVs. My messages have reduced dramatically, I get very few crass ones and the messages I do receive seem to mainly be from adventurous, experienced single men and couples.

Use the trans-phobia to your advantage!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is a sweeping generalisation as usual lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

The site tools offer the profile owner the options.. therefore the site admin / owners .. has put the proposed solutions in your or my hands not at the person who might send you abuse.. I can't change the behaviour of strangers on a digital platform.. I can only control my behaviour, I can use a tool the site provides to control who might message me,.. as I've said before makes zero difference to me ..I'm not the one who receives abusive messages ..

If you look through the archives you'll find many threads where There are many folk on here who challenge many forms of discrimination towards many different folk.

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By *allisto2000Woman
over a year ago

Stafford ish

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"So it's women's fault we get abusive messages from (mostly) men*. But why is Fab such a sausage fest and where are all the genuine ladies who actually meet?

I can do

1) nothing and keep complaining

2) hope that every guy who might send an abusive message reads my posts and changes their behaviour

3. I take control of what I can control

There's a few ladies on here who have chosen option 1. With a big dollop of option 2 ...Entirely their choice..

if a lady has read this thread and decided to take option 3 control what she can to reduce the angst ..all power to her

Same moans and complaints from some folk ..just a different day "

Why should a woman change the way they do things.

I hate to use the term victim shaming (as we are not "victims") however, that is what you are doing. Men should have more respect for women, even though we are on a swinging site.

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"I’ve found a great way to stop the majority of idiots messaging: meet a TV, show the veri and make it clear at the top of your profile that you meet TVs. My messages have reduced dramatically, I get very few crass ones and the messages I do receive seem to mainly be from adventurous, experienced single men and couples.

Use the trans-phobia to your advantage!"

That is actually a very good idea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So it's women's fault we get abusive messages from (mostly) men*. But why is Fab such a sausage fest and where are all the genuine ladies who actually meet?

I can do

1) nothing and keep complaining

2) hope that every guy who might send an abusive message reads my posts and changes their behaviour

3. I take control of what I can control

There's a few ladies on here who have chosen option 1. With a big dollop of option 2 ...Entirely their choice..

if a lady has read this thread and decided to take option 3 control what she can to reduce the angst ..all power to her

Same moans and complaints from some folk ..just a different day

Why should a woman change the way they do things.

I hate to use the term victim shaming (as we are not "victims") however, that is what you are doing. Men should have more respect for women, even though we are on a swinging site."

I agree and I think this applies to many situations.

Stalking, sexual assault, assault, harassment, bullying.

Rather than address the issue and the person who is in the wrong a lot of people like to look for wrongs or try to ‘blame’ the ‘victim’ or in this case the one recieving abuse.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe the use of filters might help filter out some of these guys as I'm guessing that most would not pay the supporters fee so block them that way.

It's unfortunate that this happens but hopefully with the use of the block button and filters it will make your stay more enjoyable

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Use the trans-phobia to your advantage!

That is actually a very good idea

Thank you. It was an unseen byproduct of a very good meet.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So it's women's fault we get abusive messages from (mostly) men*. But why is Fab such a sausage fest and where are all the genuine ladies who actually meet?

I can do

1) nothing and keep complaining

2) hope that every guy who might send an abusive message reads my posts and changes their behaviour

3. I take control of what I can control

There's a few ladies on here who have chosen option 1. With a big dollop of option 2 ...Entirely their choice..

if a lady has read this thread and decided to take option 3 control what she can to reduce the angst ..all power to her

Same moans and complaints from some folk ..just a different day

Why should a woman change the way they do things.

I hate to use the term victim shaming (as we are not "victims") however, that is what you are doing. Men should have more respect for women, even though we are on a swinging site."

Not to mention having more respect for themselves

Some of the male behaviour on here, is frankly laughable

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

"So it's women's fault we get abusive messages from (mostly) men*. But why is Fab such a sausage fest and where are all the genuine ladies who actually meet?

I can do

1) nothing and keep complaining

2) hope that every guy who might send an abusive message reads my posts and changes their behaviour

3. I take control of what I can control

There's a few ladies on here who have chosen option 1. With a big dollop of option 2 ...Entirely their choice..

if a lady has read this thread and decided to take option 3 control what she can to reduce the angst ..all power to her

Same moans and complaints from some folk ..just a different day

But you’re here complaining about women complaining.

If you don’t like thread why not find one you do?

I block them and move on. Other women probably do different. Surely if it isn’t affecting you, it’s shouldn’t be riling you up? That’s the vibe I’m getting.

If I don’t like a thread, I move onto one I do. I really don’t see any positive in moaning about other people “moaning”. "

I'm not riled ..you've chosen to block the individual if he sends you an abusive message that's your way thats fine.. I offered an alternate solution that the site provides that would vastly reduce the opportunity for abuse..yep it's a very blunt approach.. you could speak to admin oh wait someone has done that they've reported the profile and nothing happened.

If I'm anything ..I'm bored of the same moans and complaints (just look in the archives) same shit just a different day.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"Maybe the use of filters might help filter out some of these guys as I'm guessing that most would not pay the supporters fee so block them that way.

It's unfortunate that this happens but hopefully with the use of the block button and filters it will make your stay more enjoyable "

Apart from blocking single men, single women, tv's and couples from contacting me (yes, I have had crass messages from all types of profile), what else do you suggest I do? I don't have pictures on show, my profile (when unhidden) clearly states what I'm looking for and who I will reply to, but I still get them as the majority of the messages I receive.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So it's women's fault we get abusive messages from (mostly) men*. But why is Fab such a sausage fest and where are all the genuine ladies who actually meet?

I can do

1) nothing and keep complaining

2) hope that every guy who might send an abusive message reads my posts and changes their behaviour

3. I take control of what I can control

There's a few ladies on here who have chosen option 1. With a big dollop of option 2 ...Entirely their choice..

if a lady has read this thread and decided to take option 3 control what she can to reduce the angst ..all power to her

Same moans and complaints from some folk ..just a different day

But you’re here complaining about women complaining.

If you don’t like thread why not find one you do?

I block them and move on. Other women probably do different. Surely if it isn’t affecting you, it’s shouldn’t be riling you up? That’s the vibe I’m getting.

If I don’t like a thread, I move onto one I do. I really don’t see any positive in moaning about other people “moaning”.

If I'm anything ..I'm bored of the same moans and complaints (just look in the archives) same shit just a different day. "

You can’t be that bored of it as you’re adding to the thread by moaning about moaning!

Hahaha.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

As I said in a rather long winded post up thread there is no single "simple" solution and I'm not sure there ever will be as long as there are mysogynstic men about who think it's "ok" to be vile and abusive just because it's a sex/swinging site.

The ONLY thing that you can do is try as best you can to ignore it, block the offenders and make Fab the best possible experience for you that you can by whatever means are necessary, and that includes challenging those that are vile and abusive and discussing it rationally in threads such as this - if even one person changes their attitude as a result of this thread it will have been worth the effort

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

"So it's women's fault we get abusive messages from (mostly) men*. But why is Fab such a sausage fest and where are all the genuine ladies who actually meet?

I can do

1) nothing and keep complaining

2) hope that every guy who might send an abusive message reads my posts and changes their behaviour

3. I take control of what I can control

There's a few ladies on here who have chosen option 1. With a big dollop of option 2 ...Entirely their choice..

if a lady has read this thread and decided to take option 3 control what she can to reduce the angst ..all power to her

Same moans and complaints from some folk ..just a different day

Why should a woman change the way they do things.

I hate to use the term victim shaming (as we are not "victims") however, that is what you are doing. Men should have more respect for women, even though we are on a swinging site.

I agree and I think this applies to many situations.

Stalking, sexual assault, assault, harassment, bullying.

Rather than address the issue and the person who is in the wrong a lot of people like to look for wrongs or try to ‘blame’ the ‘victim’ or in this case the one recieving abuse. "

I've not blamed the recipient .show me where I've said its 'your fault' . I have offered an option so the lady can control who messages them which would vastly reduce the chance she'd receive any abuse..

If you wish to blame me for the abusive messages you have received historically from others your blame is aimed in the wrong direction ...I said up there I can't control the behaviour of others only my behaviour, I m going to struggle to change the behaviour of others on a digital platform.. look through my forum posts and you'll see where I think something is wrong I say so ...

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So it's women's fault we get abusive messages from (mostly) men*. But why is Fab such a sausage fest and where are all the genuine ladies who actually meet?

I can do

1) nothing and keep complaining

2) hope that every guy who might send an abusive message reads my posts and changes their behaviour

3. I take control of what I can control

There's a few ladies on here who have chosen option 1. With a big dollop of option 2 ...Entirely their choice..

if a lady has read this thread and decided to take option 3 control what she can to reduce the angst ..all power to her

Same moans and complaints from some folk ..just a different day

Why should a woman change the way they do things.

I hate to use the term victim shaming (as we are not "victims") however, that is what you are doing. Men should have more respect for women, even though we are on a swinging site."

I have given up on humanity......

If you honestly believe not to block single men or just live with the fact you will receive crude messages on this site is the solution... but to just live in hope that men should just start respecting single women is the answer...

Then you have to start doing some soul searching....

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

"So it's women's fault we get abusive messages from (mostly) men*. But why is Fab such a sausage fest and where are all the genuine ladies who actually meet?

I can do

1) nothing and keep complaining

2) hope that every guy who might send an abusive message reads my posts and changes their behaviour

3. I take control of what I can control

There's a few ladies on here who have chosen option 1. With a big dollop of option 2 ...Entirely their choice..

if a lady has read this thread and decided to take option 3 control what she can to reduce the angst ..all power to her

Same moans and complaints from some folk ..just a different day

But you’re here complaining about women complaining.

If you don’t like thread why not find one you do?

I block them and move on. Other women probably do different. Surely if it isn’t affecting you, it’s shouldn’t be riling you up? That’s the vibe I’m getting.

If I don’t like a thread, I move onto one I do. I really don’t see any positive in moaning about other people “moaning”.

If I'm anything ..I'm bored of the same moans and complaints (just look in the archives) same shit just a different day.

You can’t be that bored of it as you’re adding to the thread by moaning about moaning!

Hahaha. "

I offered a response.. it'd be rude not to.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As I said in a rather long winded post up thread there is no single "simple" solution and I'm not sure there ever will be as long as there are mysogynstic men about who think it's "ok" to be vile and abusive just because it's a sex/swinging site.

Spot on

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op well said ,I do think its men who has brain in penis that are the men to avoid

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've not blamed the recipient .show me where I've said its 'your fault' . I have offered an option so the lady can control who messages them which would vastly reduce the chance she'd receive any abuse..

Yawn.

Literally nobody blamed you for the abuse they received are you crazy?

It’s not all about you, I’m surprised how you’ve managed to twist it into that!

(closed, thread got too big)

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