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Dad jokes

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I am a big fan of dad jokes much to my wife’s horror

Share your worst !

Before I started swinging I always wanted to be a gregorian monk but I never got the chants

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I now know the difference between boy and girl ants.

Put an ant in a bowl of water. If it sinks it’s female. If it floats, it’s a bouyant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How do you tell what gender an ant is?

Put it in water. If it sinks, it's a girl ant, if it floats it's buoyant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I now know the difference between boy and girl ants.

Put an ant in a bowl of water. If it sinks it’s female. If it floats, it’s a bouyant. "

I think we may follow the same twitter feed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I now know the difference between boy and girl ants.

Put an ant in a bowl of water. If it sinks it’s female. If it floats, it’s a bouyant.

I think we may follow the same twitter feed "

I think you an M both do hahaha. He gets me all the time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The guy who invented throat lozenges has died

Apparently there will be no coffin at his funeral

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t do jokes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

young girl asks a labourer why he has L and R on his boots?

So I know which is the Left and which is Right He replies.

AHHHH so that's why my knickers come from C&A she says

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When germany went out of the world cup I deleted all my german contacts

I now have a Hans free phone

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

What’s the difference between a lentil and a chick pea ?

No one will pay to have a lentil on their face

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By *icassolifelikeMan
over a year ago

Luton

What’s the difference between a Buffalo and a Bison?

You can’t wash your hands in a Buffalo!

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

Want to hear a joke about a piece of paper? Never mind... it's tearable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I plan to live forever.

So far so good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I bought some second hand paint. It was in the shape of a house.

What do you get if you cross a chicken with a bag of cement.

A bricklayer

Most kids grew up with a sandpit.

We had a quicksand pit

I was an only child....eventually

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My wife told me to stop stealing the kitchen utensils..........but that’s a whisk I’m willing to take

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What’s blue, and smells like red paint?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What’s blue, and smells like red paint?"

Blue paint

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does the death of this thread mean my joke won?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Does the death of this thread mean my joke won? "

It was pretty bad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Does the death of this thread mean my joke won?

It was pretty bad "

Hehehe it was

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I didn't like my beard at first...

Then it grew on me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I didn't like my beard at first...

Then it grew on me "

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