FabSwingers.com forum: Looking forward to becoming a Domme...

By *..TheCurvyPetrolHead... OP Woman
over a year ago

St Helens

I met a guy on Tinder last year. Was a good social meet. I liked him. He is hot. Shared interests. But a second meet didn't happen. Then didn't here anything.

Over the last few weeks we have been chatting again. I have told him about my recent attendance at club events through FAB. He wants me to take him to a club. He is not on FAB.

He has also asked if I can be his Mistress (domme). He wants to be the sub. "I want to be your sex slave" as he put it.

I am looking forward to it. I told him I could be the Domme quite easily as I jokingly said I have a slight anger towards him for ghosting me last year! Haha.

He also wants to watch me with another guy and help me have my first MMF experience. He wants to come to clubs as my slave and be introduced to others as my slave.

The whole scenario is really turning me on. We are meeting next week to discuss logistics and his boundaries.

I am now working on my Domme wardrobe. I am known as being lovely and nice and the girl next door type. I have a job where I help people. I know my Domme side is screaming to get out! Cannot wait.

Have already bought a "Slave" collar...

Would love some advice from anyone who has done this; Domme or Sub. I am aware that there is Fetlife site aswell. But this is Domme/Sub integrating into the swinging world!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go for it, you'll love it.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I'm approaching this from a sub's perspective, I have no experience Dommeing apologies! But my advice would be to read and explore and learn. There's a wealth of literature available online as a good starting point - 'Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns' comes to mind but a simple Google will show more. There are various munches held through out so you can find and connect with likeminded people and ask questions, chat or whatever else. There are also club nights that you can attend.

Take it slowly and at a pace you both feel comfortable at and enjoy. Good luck OP!

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By *..TheCurvyPetrolHead... OP Woman
over a year ago

St Helens

"I'm approaching this from a sub's perspective, I have no experience Dommeing apologies! But my advice would be to read and explore and learn. There's a wealth of literature available online as a good starting point - 'Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns' comes to mind but a simple Google will show more. There are various munches held through out so you can find and connect with likeminded people and ask questions, chat or whatever else. There are also club nights that you can attend.

Take it slowly and at a pace you both feel comfortable at and enjoy. Good luck OP!"

Thank you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm starting to learn about the whole dom/sub scene and I'm finding it quite exciting. I hope to meet my own domme somewhere on this site soon. Been searching and no luck so far.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Figure out what you both want from it. Get some ideas of what he would and wouldn't like. Think about the same for you.

I usually come up with a sequence of fantasy ideas and make it happen. Then afterwards discuss what did and didn't work.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Don't approach it with even a slight anger.

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By *rkeb3Man
over a year ago

east Lancashire road

first thing is first punch him in the face when ever he calls u mistress n then kick in the nuts for being a sub tell him he doesn't need them n let them himulate him at the club yaaaaaaaaa

woooooow I can totally be a dom :-

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take it slowly and at a pace you both feel comfortable at and enjoy. Good luck OP!"

This. It all depends how much you want to get into it and if it's just for play or you want It to be part of life too. I'm a sub and we do a little of both but we don't see each other often so he doms me from afar. The best thing you can do is research loads and loads.

Clothing wise you dont need to dress up, depends if you feel you need to to get into role. Honour is excellent for fetish gear.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"first thing is first punch him in the face when ever he calls u mistress n then kick in the nuts for being a sub tell him he doesn't need them n let them himulate him at the club yaaaaaaaaa

woooooow I can totally be a dom :-

Bleedin' hell, that himulating sounds nasty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"first thing is first punch him in the face when ever he calls u mistress n then kick in the nuts for being a sub tell him he doesn't need them n let them himulate him at the club yaaaaaaaaa

woooooow I can totally be a dom :-

Bleedin' hell, that himulating sounds nasty"

Himulating?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take it slowly and at a pace you both feel comfortable at and enjoy. Good luck OP!"

Exactly this! The best thing that you can do is read, read and read some more. Lots of communication with him too about what he wants and hopes to get out of it

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By *etLikeMan
over a year ago

most fundamental aspects

"Don't approach it with even a slight anger."

Dom or Domme is a role not a manifestation of a personality

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

"Don't approach it with even a slight anger.

Dom or Domme is a role not a manifestation of a personality "

Being dominant (or a Dominant) is about being in control. If your anger comes out you’re not in control. Check out my other profile NotForSofties and have a read as there’s some things I’ve mentioned that might help you. Good luck

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By *lenderfoxMan
over a year ago

Leeds

Communication is key, remember that the sub is choosing to relinquish control

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never campbell denise richards wild things

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton

I would recommend reading SecretlyaSofties profile. She has good experience.

My concern is that you are being topped by the bottom. Putting the sex aside, what do you want out of it in terms of control?

Have though about what you want in terms of his submission. Have you discussed this with him?

He gets to call you mistress and watch you with other men I may be wrong but I don't see your imprint on the situation.

If you are enjoying it go for it, but I would suggest speaking to other experienced dommes about the situation as well.

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By *..TheCurvyPetrolHead... OP Woman
over a year ago

St Helens

Thank you very much for all the advice. I have alot of reading to do. Much appreciated! Thank you Forum!

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By *etLikeMan
over a year ago

most fundamental aspects

"Thank you very much for all the advice. I have alot of reading to do. Much appreciated! Thank you Forum!

It’s also worth joining FL. There are lots of “how to’s” from those already very experienced in the kink community.

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