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Cameras.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other.

She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there.

She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something.

A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room.

So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about.

I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that.

I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera.

It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that.

Can I have some opinions please?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers.

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By *entish79Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

First thing I’d wonder is what the tone of her question was?

Was it accusatory, as in ‘why the bloody hell were you in my room?’?

Or was it a bit friendlier, and her just trying to be helpful, as in if she knew what you were looking for, she might be able to point you in the right direction?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers."

What but lives rent free....feck that I'd throw her out

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers."

Then why not tell me?

Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room?

Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shit on her pillows

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other.

She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there.

She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something.

A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room.

So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about.

I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that.

I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera.

It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that.

Can I have some opinions please?

"
she's insecure,she's robbed a bank and the looks in that room, she has a stash of double choc chip cookies and knows you love em, she was planning to fuck her latest man that night and wanted to film it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers.

What but lives rent free....feck that I'd throw her out "

Paying rent or not is a totally separate matter. Respecting someone’s privacy is basic manners.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other.

She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there.

She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something.

A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room.

So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about.

I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that.

I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera.

It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that.

Can I have some opinions please?

she's insecure,she's robbed a bank and the looks in that room, she has a stash of double choc chip cookies and knows you love em, she was planning to fuck her latest man that night and wanted to film it "
loot I typed loot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd be a little miffed she was living under my roof for free, felt it acceptable to go in my room, but sets up a camera in hers...

If someone felt it ok to go in my room, I'd expect it to be ok if I went in there's. Trust works both ways.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"First thing I’d wonder is what the tone of her question was?

Was it accusatory, as in ‘why the bloody hell were you in my room?’?

Or was it a bit friendlier, and her just trying to be helpful, as in if she knew what you were looking for, she might be able to point you in the right direction?"

I'm unsure as it was a text.

I told her outright and she said I should have asked her. Yes I should, but at the same time I knew she was in hospital having her head glued back together after an accident at work.

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By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan
over a year ago

.

Seems strange that she has set up a camera if that's what it was,

If she didn't want you going into her room while she wasn't home why didn't she say something to you or ask if you minded her putting a lock on the door

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

She's a bit cheeky if it's your house and she doesn't even pay rent. Tell her she can pay rent and you'll stick a lock on her door.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers.

What but lives rent free....feck that I'd throw her out

Paying rent or not is a totally separate matter. Respecting someone’s privacy is basic manners."

And not to be fecking sneaky in someone else's home is basic manners too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Shit on her pillows "

No need for that, Lacey.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Seems strange that she has set up a camera if that's what it was,

If she didn't want you going into her room while she wasn't home why didn't she say something to you or ask if you minded her putting a lock on the door"

Exactly my point. I wouldn't have minded at all.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I'd be a little miffed she was living under my roof for free, felt it acceptable to go in my room, but sets up a camera in hers...

If someone felt it ok to go in my room, I'd expect it to be ok if I went in there's. Trust works both ways. "

Yep. Apparently not.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"She's a bit cheeky if it's your house and she doesn't even pay rent. Tell her she can pay rent and you'll stick a lock on her door."

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers.

What but lives rent free....feck that I'd throw her out "

This! Definitely

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore. "
ask her to leave

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By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan
over a year ago

.


"Seems strange that she has set up a camera if that's what it was,

If she didn't want you going into her room while she wasn't home why didn't she say something to you or ask if you minded her putting a lock on the door

Exactly my point. I wouldn't have minded at all. "

I would speak to her about it, Ask her why she felt the need to set one up and has she got anymore

If you can't trust someone you're sharing a house with it wont work in the long term, That goes both ways

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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago

Hull

She’s a cheeky mare. It’s not just that she doesn’t pay rent it’s all the other stuff too. She might have been good to you when you were poorly but you’ve been bloody good to her too. She takes advantage of your kind nature. You’re so open with her so why she didn’t just say she’d rather you didn’t go into her room is beyond me. That poor bloody hamster would have died at lot sooner if you didn’t go into her room sometimes!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore. "

Personally I’d sit her down, have a nice brew and tell her how this has made me feel in my own home.

I’d ask what her motives are for setting a camera up and if her answers didn’t relieve my anxieties I’d ask her to start looking for somewhere else to live ASAP.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

That would freak me out a bit knowing someone has set up a canera in my own home anyway.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"She’s a cheeky mare. It’s not just that she doesn’t pay rent it’s all the other stuff too. She might have been good to you when you were poorly but you’ve been bloody good to her too. She takes advantage of your kind nature. You’re so open with her so why she didn’t just say she’d rather you didn’t go into her room is beyond me. That poor bloody hamster would have died at lot sooner if you didn’t go into her room sometimes! "

True that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore. "

There's your answer. I'd ask her to find somewhere else to stay. I'd also be wondering if she'd put cameras in the bathroom or my room. Unless you've been stealing from her it's a really weird thing to do. Especially as she pays no rent. Hope you can get it sorted.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"That would freak me out a bit knowing someone has set up a canera in my own home anyway. "

It has me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All il say is if jeremy beadle pops out of a cupboard leg it hes a zombi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m like you Peach, I don’t mind if my roomie goes in my room to get something and visa versa. I’d be pretty miffed too, I mean that’s quite anal setting something like that up. I’d probably be inclined to be assertive and say that you needed to get something. If she questions that you should’ve asked, I’d personally say that if you need something, you don’t see why you should ask.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore.

There's your answer. I'd ask her to find somewhere else to stay. I'd also be wondering if she'd put cameras in the bathroom or my room. Unless you've been stealing from her it's a really weird thing to do. Especially as she pays no rent. Hope you can get it sorted. "

Her brothers stole from her, which is partly the reason I let her move in. We've spoken countless times and she's said how relieving it is to not need a lock on her door and to know her stuff is safe.

I'm proper freaked out and confused

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's just something you need to talk about. If you know that she has been in your room when you're not there then you can point out it was reasonable to assume you could go in hers.

Me and my room mate never go in each others room without being specifically invited or getting permission. I would be very upset if someone went in a space I considered private, as that is a massive thing for me.

If you have an agreement she can live with you and that is her room then whether she pays rent or not that is her space to do what she wants in. Unless it has broken a house rule I don't think you have the high ground about feeling violated.

There are reasons she might have had a camera running other than to spy on you.

It sounds like you just both need to agree that you hadn't set boundaries so no one is to blame (Or you are equally to blame). Either you negotiate new boundaries or choose not to live together any more. If lack of rent is a sore point maybe you should agree on that as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

understand that she has the right to privacy a camera really she's out of order she lives in your place for nothing and she should be grateful to for you giving her a roof over her head

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore.

There's your answer. I'd ask her to find somewhere else to stay. I'd also be wondering if she'd put cameras in the bathroom or my room. Unless you've been stealing from her it's a really weird thing to do. Especially as she pays no rent. Hope you can get it sorted.

Her brothers stole from her, which is partly the reason I let her move in. We've spoken countless times and she's said how relieving it is to not need a lock on her door and to know her stuff is safe.

I'm proper freaked out and confused "

I wasn't inferring that you *were* stealing, it was just a comment. x

Could be she's paranoid and always had a camera because of her past. It might make her feel safe. Maybe have an open chat with her and see how you feel then. Hugs xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

can understand why after her brother stole from her but still bit over board from her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd be a little miffed she was living under my roof for free, felt it acceptable to go in my room, but sets up a camera in hers...

If someone felt it ok to go in my room, I'd expect it to be ok if I went in there's. Trust works both ways. "

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

It's your house you have the right to take control,if she doesn't like it she can go back home.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d feel a bit miffed as well, if she has got a camera why doesn’t she afford you the same privacy as she wants. I think you need a good talk and set some boundaries. The camera would have to go. X

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

I'm gonna tell her to put a lock on her door or fuck off I think. I'm not having spy cams in my home. That's a line that doesn't get crossed as far as I'm concerned.

Urghhh, but now it has me questioning is it just her room there's sensors?!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore.

There's your answer. I'd ask her to find somewhere else to stay. I'd also be wondering if she'd put cameras in the bathroom or my room. Unless you've been stealing from her it's a really weird thing to do. Especially as she pays no rent. Hope you can get it sorted.

Her brothers stole from her, which is partly the reason I let her move in. We've spoken countless times and she's said how relieving it is to not need a lock on her door and to know her stuff is safe.

I'm proper freaked out and confused "

It all sounds a bit mad Peach. Setting up cameras in someone else's home seems a bit creepy to say the least no matter the context

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

I've messaged and told her to get a lock if she doesn't trust me or to go.

She doesn't understand why I'm upset.

We're gonna talk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

@Peach.

Get her out of your house as fast as possible.

Once gone, get an expert in to sweep your house for bugs and cameras. Before you do that that though, reset your home router to factory defaults. Then input a different but secure password and don't under any circumstances let her have access to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore.

Personally I’d sit her down, have a nice brew and tell her how this has made me feel in my own home.

I’d ask what her motives are for setting a camera up and if her answers didn’t relieve my anxieties I’d ask her to start looking for somewhere else to live ASAP."

Exactly this

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"@Peach.

Get her out of your house as fast as possible.

Once gone, get an expert in to sweep your house for bugs and cameras. Before you do that that though, reset your home router to factory defaults. Then input a different but secure password and don't under any circumstances let her have access to it."

This sounds rather dramatic. Please tell me why.

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

You have discovered one camera or sensor. Might there be more?

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"You have discovered one camera or sensor. Might there be more?"

I don't think so, not really. But hey, I didn't think there would be any at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"@Peach.

Get her out of your house as fast as possible.

Once gone, get an expert in to sweep your house for bugs and cameras. Before you do that that though, reset your home router to factory defaults. Then input a different but secure password and don't under any circumstances let her have access to it.

This sounds rather dramatic. Please tell me why."

Because the only way she knew you went into her room was because you gave her access to your router. Because she has been devious in setting up a camera in her room connected to your router she is not to be trusted. You have to set it to factory default because you would have no ides if she has set up a VPN as well. Do as i said, and then make shure she has no physical access to you router.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Could see a reasoning behind it if shes paranoid from her pàst but still not acceptable in someones house. It's a horrible thing to think you're being watched or not trusted, especially your own home, and by someone you trust

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By *eplicant JoWoman
over a year ago

Sussex countryside

I would be a bit peeved and would probably ask her to find somewhere else to live.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask her y she has a spy cam in her room doesnt she trust u or is it in fear of being burgled ? So to catch the culprit on camera ? Maybe its for security.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Ask her y she has a spy cam in her room doesnt she trust u or is it in fear of being burgled ? So to catch the culprit on camera ? Maybe its for security. "

If it's for security then maybe she could have told me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore.

Personally I’d sit her down, have a nice brew and tell her how this has made me feel in my own home.

I’d ask what her motives are for setting a camera up and if her answers didn’t relieve my anxieties I’d ask her to start looking for somewhere else to live ASAP.

Exactly this "

I would probably say this too. It would thoroughly piss me off if I’d taken someone in under those circumstances and they set up a camera like that. It infers a total lack of trust in you and is deeply hypocritical seeing as how she’s comfortable going into your room too.

A long conversation is needed and a firm but gentle push out of the door.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Should we just fuck in her room?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ask her y she has a spy cam in her room doesnt she trust u or is it in fear of being burgled ? So to catch the culprit on camera ? Maybe its for security.

If it's for security then maybe she could have told me. "

If it’s for security then why just her room?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Should we just fuck in her room? "
I second that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rather sounds like a complete breach of trust to me if your being watched by another on camera in your own home....

No matter what they claim the reason to be....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As someone who has rented shared houses, been a lodger and a landlord, if you have given her a room then it's HER room and it's no longer YOUR house. It's a SHARED house.

If her room is not her room then you should not refer to it as such. Call it the spare room or the guest room and keep towels or something in there. If you have agreed she can have that space as her own it is really not fair to be upset she treated it like her own. If you haven't told her she can't have cameras or that she cant treat it as her own then she really hasn't done anything wrong.

Just talk to her.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *erri AnneTV/TS
over a year ago

Shannon and Costa Blanca


"I've messaged and told her to get a lock if she doesn't trust me or to go.

She doesn't understand why I'm upset.

We're gonna talk "

What was the reason you went into the room?

But when you talk you should ask her to find her own place or pay the going rate for rent.

It's an insult to your generousty to install a camera in your house like that.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *erri AnneTV/TS
over a year ago

Shannon and Costa Blanca


"As someone who has rented shared houses, been a lodger and a landlord, if you have given her a room then it's HER room and it's no longer YOUR house. It's a SHARED house.

If her room is not her room then you should not refer to it as such. Call it the spare room or the guest room and keep towels or something in there. If you have agreed she can have that space as her own it is really not fair to be upset she treated it like her own. If you haven't told her she can't have cameras or that she cant treat it as her own then she really hasn't done anything wrong.

Just talk to her. "

She doesn't show him this respect as she goes into his room

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I've messaged and told her to get a lock if she doesn't trust me or to go.

She doesn't understand why I'm upset.

We're gonna talk

What was the reason you went into the room?

But when you talk you should ask her to find her own place or pay the going rate for rent.

It's an insult to your generousty to install a camera in your house like that."

I was looking for something and was pretty sure I knew where it was.

I didn't wanna disturb her coz I knew she was busy.

Hindsight eh.

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By *erri AnneTV/TS
over a year ago

Shannon and Costa Blanca


"You have discovered one camera or sensor. Might there be more?"

Did you find the camera

You should have removed it if you did, and make sure she has none elsewhere.

Is she running a website cam show from your home

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"As someone who has rented shared houses, been a lodger and a landlord, if you have given her a room then it's HER room and it's no longer YOUR house. It's a SHARED house.

If her room is not her room then you should not refer to it as such. Call it the spare room or the guest room and keep towels or something in there. If you have agreed she can have that space as her own it is really not fair to be upset she treated it like her own. If you haven't told her she can't have cameras or that she cant treat it as her own then she really hasn't done anything wrong.

Just talk to her. "

She was having issues and when my son moved out I said she could have his room, but if he wanted to move back home then he could, and she'd have to find somewhere else.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"You have discovered one camera or sensor. Might there be more?

Did you find the camera

You should have removed it if you did, and make sure she has none elsewhere.

Is she running a website cam show from your home"

I've not been back in since. I guessed there was something she was trying to protect, so I wasn't gonna go snooping or do anything to make things more uncomfortable for either of us.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"She’s a cheeky mare. It’s not just that she doesn’t pay rent it’s all the other stuff too. She might have been good to you when you were poorly but you’ve been bloody good to her too. She takes advantage of your kind nature. You’re so open with her so why she didn’t just say she’d rather you didn’t go into her room is beyond me. That poor bloody hamster would have died at lot sooner if you didn’t go into her room sometimes! "

Yep. Peach knows my thoughts on this

She's taking the fucking piss.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan
over a year ago

.

You won't get the answers you want until you have spoken to her face to face,

Just ask her why she has one, Her reply will help you make your mind up if you want her to continue living with you

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!! "

Aaaand that's me told.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

Without knowing all of the facts.., I've read a few of the posts. .

if you've been in her room before and you've not had the text or call before seems to be a new camera install... I'd be questioning why if it's new she needed it or thought she needed it .. hard to say what you should do without knowing all of the info..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

Aaaand that's me told."

Not the first time

Let's have a shoe on the other foot scenario

What would P tell H?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!! "

Good God definitely send her home.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

Aaaand that's me told.

Not the first time

Let's have a shoe on the other foot scenario

What would P tell H?"

Grow some balls bitch and stop trying to people please.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago

Hull


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

Aaaand that's me told."

You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

Aaaand that's me told.

You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story. "

Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

Aaaand that's me told.

You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story.

Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it."

This is a weird thing to be nominated for

But sure, I’m up for it

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

Aaaand that's me told.

You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story.

Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it."

I think everyone needs a friend like you.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers.

Then why not tell me?

Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room?

Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera?

"

Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up.

I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

Aaaand that's me told.

You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story.

Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it.

This is a weird thing to be nominated for

But sure, I’m up for it "

Are you the go to shitting on things guy

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

Aaaand that's me told.

You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story.

Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it.

I think everyone needs a friend like you."

I don't if that's true

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

Aaaand that's me told.

You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story.

Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it.

This is a weird thing to be nominated for

But sure, I’m up for it

Are you the go to shitting on things guy "

Is it cake that’s been sending the messages I’ve been hearing about? If so then doing it on some stuff is a step down

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers.

Then why not tell me?

Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room?

Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera?

Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up.

I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy "

And I have done. I rarely go in there unless she's in there. There have been times I've walked in my front door and seen her coming out my room.

I don't borrow things without asking, in fact I borrow fuck all from her.

It's just all very strange.

I have mentioned to friends she's been acting all secretive and "door closey" of late.

We normally both have our bedroom doors open as the dog has the run of the house, but recently hers has remained shut most of the time.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

Aaaand that's me told.

You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story.

Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it.

This is a weird thing to be nominated for

But sure, I’m up for it

Are you the go to shitting on things guy "

Apparently so

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Firstly she is taking the piss

Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored

She doesn't pull her weight

She causes hassle with the neighbours

She makes no contribution

The room is a fucking mess

You are not her mother

Send her the fuck home to grow up!!

Aaaand that's me told.

You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story.

Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it.

This is a weird thing to be nominated for

But sure, I’m up for it

Are you the go to shitting on things guy

Is it cake that’s been sending the messages I’ve been hearing about? If so then doing it on some stuff is a step down"

We all have our kinks

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers.

Then why not tell me?

Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room?

Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera?

Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up.

I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy

And I have done. I rarely go in there unless she's in there. There have been times I've walked in my front door and seen her coming out my room.

I don't borrow things without asking, in fact I borrow fuck all from her.

It's just all very strange.

I have mentioned to friends she's been acting all secretive and "door closey" of late.

We normally both have our bedroom doors open as the dog has the run of the house, but recently hers has remained shut most of the time.

"

I think she is sending a big message of she needs her privacy.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry to hear this, P - and totally understandable that it’s upset and unnerved you. Talk to her, as you’re already planning to do. I wonder if she’s having some difficulties herself and is dealing with some paranoia? It doesn’t negate any of your upset or need to discuss the issue, but perhaps coming to the discussion from a place of concern to hear her (as well as your upset) might be useful to facilitate the best outcome (which still might well be her moving out). It must be a very uncomfortable and isolated place to be operating from to feel the need to install cameras, however much I would be as unhappy as you if I were in your shoes. Hope the chat goes well for you both, and hope you’re okay.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it has*

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

The trust has gone. That Honey bird talks sense. Good luck

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers.

Then why not tell me?

Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room?

Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera?

Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up.

I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy

And I have done. I rarely go in there unless she's in there. There have been times I've walked in my front door and seen her coming out my room.

I don't borrow things without asking, in fact I borrow fuck all from her.

It's just all very strange.

I have mentioned to friends she's been acting all secretive and "door closey" of late.

We normally both have our bedroom doors open as the dog has the run of the house, but recently hers has remained shut most of the time.

I think she is sending a big message of she needs her privacy. "

That's fine and dandy if that's what it is.

She doesn't get up until early afternoon, I leave for work at 4 most days so we hardly see each other anyway. I'll pay someone to come in and look after my dog while I'm at work so she doesn't need to leave her room at all.

She can get a lock on her door. Mine will remain open as I've nothing to hide.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"The trust has gone. That Honey bird talks sense. Good luck "

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

If she wants a lock tell her to pay some rent.

It is your home

Your name on the tenancy.

She wants to be alone maybe she ought to crack on and find her own place

But that would mean paying bills

Shock fucking horror.

Also probably paranoid from all 'insence' fumes.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"The trust has gone. That Honey bird talks sense. Good luck

"

The trust has gone.

There have been house rules that HAVE been repeatedly ignored too, so that Honey bird talks sense there aswell.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"The trust has gone. That Honey bird talks sense. Good luck

The trust has gone.

There have been house rules that HAVE been repeatedly ignored too, so that Honey bird talks sense there aswell. "

I feel like Judge Rinder right now.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers.

Then why not tell me?

Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room?

Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera?

Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up.

I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy

And I have done. I rarely go in there unless she's in there. There have been times I've walked in my front door and seen her coming out my room.

I don't borrow things without asking, in fact I borrow fuck all from her.

It's just all very strange.

I have mentioned to friends she's been acting all secretive and "door closey" of late.

We normally both have our bedroom doors open as the dog has the run of the house, but recently hers has remained shut most of the time.

I think she is sending a big message of she needs her privacy.

That's fine and dandy if that's what it is.

She doesn't get up until early afternoon, I leave for work at 4 most days so we hardly see each other anyway. I'll pay someone to come in and look after my dog while I'm at work so she doesn't need to leave her room at all.

She can get a lock on her door. Mine will remain open as I've nothing to hide.

"

You asked for opinions, that was mine, I didn't say it was fact and I could be way off the mark so making those decisions before talking to her and finding out what is going on probably won't help.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe she's working for Sydney University? Have you found the other cameras and microphones yet?.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"Maybe she's working for Sydney University? Have you found the other cameras and microphones yet?."

She's caming you wanking!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers.

Then why not tell me?

Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room?

Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera?

Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up.

I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy

And I have done. I rarely go in there unless she's in there. There have been times I've walked in my front door and seen her coming out my room.

I don't borrow things without asking, in fact I borrow fuck all from her.

It's just all very strange.

I have mentioned to friends she's been acting all secretive and "door closey" of late.

We normally both have our bedroom doors open as the dog has the run of the house, but recently hers has remained shut most of the time.

I think she is sending a big message of she needs her privacy.

That's fine and dandy if that's what it is.

She doesn't get up until early afternoon, I leave for work at 4 most days so we hardly see each other anyway. I'll pay someone to come in and look after my dog while I'm at work so she doesn't need to leave her room at all.

She can get a lock on her door. Mine will remain open as I've nothing to hide.

You asked for opinions, that was mine, I didn't say it was fact and I could be way off the mark so making those decisions before talking to her and finding out what is going on probably won't help.

"

Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now.

I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again.

I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *egs11ABCWoman
over a year ago

Aberdeen


"That would freak me out a bit knowing someone has set up a canera in my own home anyway. "

Just what i was going to say. Id be very suspicious of someone setting up a camera in MY house without my permission. That's an invasion of ur privacy in ur property. X

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"That would freak me out a bit knowing someone has set up a canera in my own home anyway.

Just what i was going to say. Id be very suspicious of someone setting up a camera in MY house without my permission. That's an invasion of ur privacy in ur property. X"

Yep. I would take the advice above and change the router codes etc.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It sounds like there’s a whole host of shit going down so I’m only talking about this one incident .....

Regardless of paying rent or not, if she lives with you in a room then unless you’ve agreed you can go on her room I can see why she’s assumed you wouldn’t. Regardless of how she treats your room. So camera or not, that’s a bit naughty.

Whether she can put a cam up ... i struggle to see why she can’t and why she should have to tell you. It’s her right to have secrets. Her reasons may be ones she’s not comfortable with sharing.

But if you want to resolve this, it needs a conversation. Why it has *insert emotion here* you. And hopefully she will offer why she did this. An then, boundaries need to be agreed.

Of course if she is a Cadbury’s fruit and nut cake then what honey said.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"It sounds like there’s a whole host of shit going down so I’m only talking about this one incident .....

Regardless of paying rent or not, if she lives with you in a room then unless you’ve agreed you can go on her room I can see why she’s assumed you wouldn’t. Regardless of how she treats your room. So camera or not, that’s a bit naughty.

Whether she can put a cam up ... i struggle to see why she can’t and why she should have to tell you. It’s her right to have secrets. Her reasons may be ones she’s not comfortable with sharing.

But if you want to resolve this, it needs a conversation. Why it has *insert emotion here* you. And hopefully she will offer why she did this. An then, boundaries need to be agreed.

Of course if she is a Cadbury’s fruit and nut cake then what honey said. "

I would like to reiterate I wasn't snooping, I was looking for a specific item and was correct as to it's location.

She goes in mine and I've never ever been suspicious or felt the need to ask why. I just took it for granted she wanted to use the tall mirror coz she can't actually get to her own due to mess/borrow hair spray or deodorant etc.

She can have all the secrets she wants as long as it's nothing illegal. I've the right to know if she's putting my tenancy in danger. That's the only real reason I can think she may want a camera.

She's turned the light off now so it seems my request to talk has fallen on deaf ears.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Oh god that's all just really awkward, isn't it?! Shame she's not had a chat with you before going to bed.

Some of the comments (mainly resetting the thingy thing) would be making me totally paranoid!!

I'd be getting a lock on my door!!! (Sorry PP)

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Oh god that's all just really awkward, isn't it?! Shame she's not had a chat with you before going to bed.

Some of the comments (mainly resetting the thingy thing) would be making me totally paranoid!!

I'd be getting a lock on my door!!! (Sorry PP)"

I'm a smidge concerned in case there are others but I don't really think there are.

I may need to reduce the size of the room though to build a cupboard for items like the vacuum cleaner and other stuff she might want access to that is currently stored in my room.

You know, if we're gonna get funny about going in each other's rooms. Or maybe I'll just keep it in my room, get a lock on my door and she can buy her own.

To be honest I won't do that. I'll leave my door open as per usual so the dog can go in if she wants. I've got fuck all to hide.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd. "

I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere


"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd.

I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words "

I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night

How long has she lived at yours?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

My poor pooch is sat waiting outside the door. She's been allowed in that room for the last 5 years and it has a comfy sofa in there for her (which is mine) that she's been banished from it seems.

I may ask for the sofa back.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Both of us are rubbish at sharing our home, we struggle to tolerate over night guests. If we'd invited someone to stay we wouldn't want them in our bedroom for any reason other than to rescue us from a fire. If we discovered they'd set up a motion sensor camera in the room they were using we'd be a bit miffed. If they then used that camera to question us about what we were doing *in our own home* we'd consider the time had come for our guest to take their camera elsewhere.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"My poor pooch is sat waiting outside the door. She's been allowed in that room for the last 5 years and it has a comfy sofa in there for her (which is mine) that she's been banished from it seems.

I may ask for the sofa back."

House rules are what you need if she's to stay.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd.

I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words

I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night

How long has she lived at yours?"

Since September.

It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd.

I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words

I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night

How long has she lived at yours?

Since September.

It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet."

Hmm. Too comfortable by half. Your good nature is being taken advantage of I fear.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"My poor pooch is sat waiting outside the door. She's been allowed in that room for the last 5 years and it has a comfy sofa in there for her (which is mine) that she's been banished from it seems.

I may ask for the sofa back.

House rules are what you need if she's to stay. "

They get broken when I'm not here. Fuck, they get broken when I am here and she thinks I'm asleep! She must think I have no sense of smell.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd.

I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words

I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night

How long has she lived at yours?

Since September.

It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet.

Hmm. Too comfortable by half. Your good nature is being taken advantage of I fear."

I've been told that for a good few months now.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other.

She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there.

She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something.

A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room.

So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about.

I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that.

I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera.

It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that.

Can I have some opinions please?

"

It’s time to tell her to leave , if you want to save the friendship...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere


"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd.

I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words

I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night

How long has she lived at yours?

Since September.

It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet."

Bless you Peach. She probably didn't want to talk cos she has an inkling what's coming. Ie you telling her to fuck off!!!

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Both of us are rubbish at sharing our home, we struggle to tolerate over night guests. If we'd invited someone to stay we wouldn't want them in our bedroom for any reason other than to rescue us from a fire. If we discovered they'd set up a motion sensor camera in the room they were using we'd be a bit miffed. If they then used that camera to question us about what we were doing *in our own home* we'd consider the time had come for our guest to take their camera elsewhere."

That's the thing, I don't treat her like a lodger or anything, she's a guest in my house. She's had it far too easy for far too long. I was doing her a favour and regardless of what others have said about respecting her privacy (which I do far more than she does mine) I feel quite invaded.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"My poor pooch is sat waiting outside the door. She's been allowed in that room for the last 5 years and it has a comfy sofa in there for her (which is mine) that she's been banished from it seems.

I may ask for the sofa back.

House rules are what you need if she's to stay.

They get broken when I'm not here. Fuck, they get broken when I am here and she thinks I'm asleep! She must think I have no sense of smell."

Well if you give a child a boundary then do nothing when it oversteps it they'll carry on doing it. Adults are the same.

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By *heDesiCandiTV/TS
over a year ago

… travelling

Hmmm

Several things

The property is yours - so did she ask you before setting up cameras or motion detection - I ask in particular if any holes were drilled to attach the camera

I am assuming the room furnishings are yours and that you may have things in the room that belong to you. Therefore, by that assumption, you are entitled to take your things as long as you don’t go through her personal things.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

[Removed by poster at 13/07/18 00:37:53]

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"My poor pooch is sat waiting outside the door. She's been allowed in that room for the last 5 years and it has a comfy sofa in there for her (which is mine) that she's been banished from it seems.

I may ask for the sofa back.

House rules are what you need if she's to stay.

They get broken when I'm not here. Fuck, they get broken when I am here and she thinks I'm asleep! She must think I have no sense of smell.

Well if you give a child a boundary then do nothing when it oversteps it they'll carry on doing it. Adults are the same.

"

This is very true. Aside from turfing her out I didn't know what to do apart from turn a blind eye and hope she would see my point. When it's your kids you can give a fitting punishment, when it's a mate it's far more difficult

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Both of us are rubbish at sharing our home, we struggle to tolerate over night guests. If we'd invited someone to stay we wouldn't want them in our bedroom for any reason other than to rescue us from a fire. If we discovered they'd set up a motion sensor camera in the room they were using we'd be a bit miffed. If they then used that camera to question us about what we were doing *in our own home* we'd consider the time had come for our guest to take their camera elsewhere.

That's the thing, I don't treat her like a lodger or anything, she's a guest in my house. She's had it far too easy for far too long. I was doing her a favour and regardless of what others have said about respecting her privacy (which I do far more than she does mine) I feel quite invaded. "

You're treating her as a guest but she's not behaving like one.

I think you have three options.

Ask her to leave.

Set up house rules and insist that they and your home are respected.

Say nothing and continue as you are.

How does the current arrangement benefit you?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"My poor pooch is sat waiting outside the door. She's been allowed in that room for the last 5 years and it has a comfy sofa in there for her (which is mine) that she's been banished from it seems.

I may ask for the sofa back.

House rules are what you need if she's to stay.

They get broken when I'm not here. Fuck, they get broken when I am here and she thinks I'm asleep! She must think I have no sense of smell.

Well if you give a child a boundary then do nothing when it oversteps it they'll carry on doing it. Adults are the same.

This is very true. Aside from turfing her out I didn't know what to do apart from turn a blind eye and hope she would see my point. When it's your kids you can give a fitting punishment, when it's a mate it's far more difficult "

Sorry I'm answering earlier posts while you're answering my later ones .

Turning a blind eye is an option but she won't see your point, why would she?

You don't need to punish but you can very firmly say that you have a couple of rules you want her to abide by and if she feels she's unable to unfortunately you will have to aske her to find somewhere else to live within a month.

It's tough being firm with people but sometimes it has to be done or they take you for a mug.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Both of us are rubbish at sharing our home, we struggle to tolerate over night guests. If we'd invited someone to stay we wouldn't want them in our bedroom for any reason other than to rescue us from a fire. If we discovered they'd set up a motion sensor camera in the room they were using we'd be a bit miffed. If they then used that camera to question us about what we were doing *in our own home* we'd consider the time had come for our guest to take their camera elsewhere.

That's the thing, I don't treat her like a lodger or anything, she's a guest in my house. She's had it far too easy for far too long. I was doing her a favour and regardless of what others have said about respecting her privacy (which I do far more than she does mine) I feel quite invaded.

You're treating her as a guest but she's not behaving like one.

I think you have three options.

Ask her to leave.

Set up house rules and insist that they and your home are respected.

Say nothing and continue as you are.

How does the current arrangement benefit you?"

I have someone to take care of the dog when I'm not here. That's the only plus.

That and knowing I was helping her.

If she has work on a morning, I don't have people here (I made that cock up once and was told my friends were disrespectful, she needs her sleep and if it happened again she'd knock the noisy one out)

Zero financial benefit.

She does no housework or gardening.

She's really fucking messy in every room other than mine.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

In short I'm being taken for a mug

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Shit on her pillows "

Or post a listing on the forum and find someone who will enjoy shitting on her pillow and let her check the camera for that one

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"In short I'm being taken for a mug "

Let's say your good nature is being taken advantage of. Sometimes you need to see things in black and white to realise how bad they've become.

What are you going to do?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"In short I'm being taken for a mug

Let's say your good nature is being taken advantage of. Sometimes you need to see things in black and white to realise how bad they've become.

What are you going to do?"

Yeah! What are you going to do? Can we take bets?

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"In short I'm being taken for a mug

Let's say your good nature is being taken advantage of. Sometimes you need to see things in black and white to realise how bad they've become.

What are you going to do?"

I'm gonna tell her if she wants a lock on her door that's fine. No cameras. None.

I'm gonna draw up a chores list, no fucking about, no moaning about being tired from work. It gets done and that's that.

I'm gonna tell her that incense doesn't mask the smell she's trying to hide and that what I previously said still stands. No smoking that shit in my house.

I'm gonna tell her if she doesn't like it, I'll have my spare key back thanking you muchly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway. "

We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.

She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"

I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.

A full day it took for her to face me.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.

We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.

She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"

I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.

A full day it took for her to face me."

Who bought the pop just out of interest? You sound a very tolerant person to put up with all that crap. Why isn't she paying towards any bill's if she's working,she should offer cheeky bitch.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.

We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.

She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"

I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.

A full day it took for her to face me."
make her homeless cmon she's a biatch, put your foot down

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've just read the whole thread and all your posts op, it sounds quite bad!

One thing that pops out to me is that you rent your property, is that private or local authority?

If it's private, is she a permitted tenant? Does your landlord know?

If not I'd use that as a good excuse to ask her too leave.

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've just read the whole thread and all your posts op, it sounds quite bad!

One thing that pops out to me is that you rent your property, is that private or local authority?

If it's private, is she a permitted tenant? Does your landlord know?

If not I'd use that as a good excuse to ask her too leave.

Good luck "
shhhhhh council don't know

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By *rMrsWestMidsCouple
over a year ago

Dudley


"I'm gonna tell her to put a lock on her door or fuck off I think. I'm not having spy cams in my home. That's a line that doesn't get crossed as far as I'm concerned.

Urghhh, but now it has me questioning is it just her room there's sensors?! "

The trust is gone, it's time for her to go too!

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

Just to re-iterate what some others have said:

She is not a tennant/roommate. She is a guest in your home and as such has no right whatsoever to privacy and certainly no right to set up hidden cameras (or install anything, including furniture, art etc) without your consent.

I'd insist the camera was removed, reset the router and give her no further access to the Wi-Fi that you presumably pay for. If she'd like internet access she can go and use public services or get her own place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If she’s smoking waccy baccy then the camera is most likely to protect her stash.

She sounds aggressive and a nightmare.

I’d ask her to leave. Pronto.

I’d also change my locks.

If she has a boyfriend then he can look after her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If she’s smoking waccy baccy then the camera is most likely to protect her stash.

She sounds aggressive and a nightmare.

I’d ask her to leave. Pronto.

I’d also change my locks.

If she has a boyfriend then he can look after her."
let's all pop round and help her throw her out...... Ease the burden

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The trust has gone. That Honey bird talks sense. Good luck

The trust has gone.

There have been house rules that HAVE been repeatedly ignored too, so that Honey bird talks sense there aswell. "

If it was only a temporary arrangement to help her out, why have you never asked her for rent since?

Get Judge Rinder Honey on the case.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If she’s smoking waccy baccy then the camera is most likely to protect her stash.

She sounds aggressive and a nightmare.

I’d ask her to leave. Pronto.

I’d also change my locks.

If she has a boyfriend then he can look after her.let's all pop round and help her throw her out...... Ease the burden "

I'm in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I mean cctv it's intrusive

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By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman
over a year ago

stourbridge area

Locks on doors ....end of problem .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Locks on doors ....end of problem ."
yes front door stuff in black bags outside it, their ya go another wrong righted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Both of us are rubbish at sharing our home, we struggle to tolerate over night guests. If we'd invited someone to stay we wouldn't want them in our bedroom for any reason other than to rescue us from a fire. If we discovered they'd set up a motion sensor camera in the room they were using we'd be a bit miffed. If they then used that camera to question us about what we were doing *in our own home* we'd consider the time had come for our guest to take their camera elsewhere."

Same here

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

Next time turn off your router before you go in so her camera won’t connect to the outside world then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ask her y she has a spy cam in her room doesnt she trust u or is it in fear of being burgled ? So to catch the culprit on camera ? Maybe its for security.

If it's for security then maybe she could have told me. "

Yes def she should of told u and maybe suggested u did the same thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hope you get it sorted out x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s very rude to go in someone’s room without their permission

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd.

I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words

I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night

How long has she lived at yours?

Since September.

It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet.

Hmm. Too comfortable by half. Your good nature is being taken advantage of I fear.

I've been told that for a good few months now."

All this has obv affected your relationship its making u uncomfortable in your own home ... she doesnt adhere to your house rules .... it was a temporary offer of a place to stay ... time to ask her to move out i think . Good luck xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It’s very rude to go in someone’s room without their permission "
omg WW5 you've just started

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford


"It’s very rude to go in someone’s room without their permission "

Exactly. It's the OPs room, not her guests. Her guest clearly has permission to be in it, but it is not her room, it is the OPs room.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.

We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.

She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"

I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.

A full day it took for her to face me.

Who bought the pop just out of interest? You sound a very tolerant person to put up with all that crap. Why isn't she paying towards any bill's if she's working,she should offer cheeky bitch."

She'd brought that bottle.

She has no issues in eating/drinking the things that I buy and leave in the kitchen, I don't mind either unless it's the last mouthful of chocolate or something! I just think if it's there, have it. She normally has a bottle that's solely hers in her room.

I was paying the bills anyway, whether she was here or not. The only thing I ask her to do is put gas and electricity in the meter as that IS an extra cost once I've put my normal amount on and it's all been used.

I thought it would be a nice thing to let her save up for a decent deposit for somewhere else rather than take money off her for bills that I'm paying anyway.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.

We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.

She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"

I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.

A full day it took for her to face me.

Who bought the pop just out of interest? You sound a very tolerant person to put up with all that crap. Why isn't she paying towards any bill's if she's working,she should offer cheeky bitch.

She'd brought that bottle.

She has no issues in eating/drinking the things that I buy and leave in the kitchen, I don't mind either unless it's the last mouthful of chocolate or something! I just think if it's there, have it. She normally has a bottle that's solely hers in her room.

I was paying the bills anyway, whether she was here or not. The only thing I ask her to do is put gas and electricity in the meter as that IS an extra cost once I've put my normal amount on and it's all been used.

I thought it would be a nice thing to let her save up for a decent deposit for somewhere else rather than take money off her for bills that I'm paying anyway. "

...and it's great of you to do that,she's lucky she had you to give her a roof over her head.

If you had taken me in I would be eternally grateful and respectful of your home. I wouldn't be leaving your home a mess in every room,I wouldn't be smoking god knows what in your home and I sure as heck wouldn't be setting up a camera in your home.

She sounds a brat how old is she?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe theres hidden cams in all the rooms

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.

We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.

She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"

I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.

A full day it took for her to face me.

Who bought the pop just out of interest? You sound a very tolerant person to put up with all that crap. Why isn't she paying towards any bill's if she's working,she should offer cheeky bitch.

She'd brought that bottle.

She has no issues in eating/drinking the things that I buy and leave in the kitchen, I don't mind either unless it's the last mouthful of chocolate or something! I just think if it's there, have it. She normally has a bottle that's solely hers in her room.

I was paying the bills anyway, whether she was here or not. The only thing I ask her to do is put gas and electricity in the meter as that IS an extra cost once I've put my normal amount on and it's all been used.

I thought it would be a nice thing to let her save up for a decent deposit for somewhere else rather than take money off her for bills that I'm paying anyway.

...and it's great of you to do that,she's lucky she had you to give her a roof over her head.

If you had taken me in I would be eternally grateful and respectful of your home. I wouldn't be leaving your home a mess in every room,I wouldn't be smoking god knows what in your home and I sure as heck wouldn't be setting up a camera in your home.

She sounds a brat how old is she?"

She's just turned 25, had a pretty shitty home life growing up.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other.

She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there.

She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something.

A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room.

So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about.

I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that.

I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera.

It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that.

Can I have some opinions please?

"

If she pays no rent and she's been living there more than 6 months you might find half the house is hers.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other.

She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there.

She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something.

A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room.

So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about.

I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that.

I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera.

It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that.

Can I have some opinions please?

If she pays no rent and she's been living there more than 6 months you might find half the house is hers."

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

She sounds younger,especially after going straight to her room last night like a teenager would after falling out with a parent. Well hopefully she has saved enough money for her to move out soon,if she didn't smoke crap she'd be out sooner. I hope you get it sorted.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other.

She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there.

She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something.

A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room.

So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about.

I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that.

I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera.

It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that.

Can I have some opinions please?

If she pays no rent and she's been living there more than 6 months you might find half the house is hers."

That sounds stupid enough to be true.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.

We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.

She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"

I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.

A full day it took for her to face me.

Who bought the pop just out of interest? You sound a very tolerant person to put up with all that crap. Why isn't she paying towards any bill's if she's working,she should offer cheeky bitch.

She'd brought that bottle.

She has no issues in eating/drinking the things that I buy and leave in the kitchen, I don't mind either unless it's the last mouthful of chocolate or something! I just think if it's there, have it. She normally has a bottle that's solely hers in her room.

I was paying the bills anyway, whether she was here or not. The only thing I ask her to do is put gas and electricity in the meter as that IS an extra cost once I've put my normal amount on and it's all been used.

I thought it would be a nice thing to let her save up for a decent deposit for somewhere else rather than take money off her for bills that I'm paying anyway.

...and it's great of you to do that,she's lucky she had you to give her a roof over her head.

If you had taken me in I would be eternally grateful and respectful of your home. I wouldn't be leaving your home a mess in every room,I wouldn't be smoking god knows what in your home and I sure as heck wouldn't be setting up a camera in your home.

She sounds a brat how old is she?

She's just turned 25, had a pretty shitty home life growing up. "

You have done a lovely thing for her and it shows you are a caring person (and extremely tolerant).

Just because she had a shitty up bringing, doesn't give her the right to be shitty to you. She should be bloody great full. I had a shitty up bringing, but it's no excuse for her behaviour. I'd never treat a friend that way. By the age of 25 you know the difference right and wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This thread has reminded me why I fucking hated living with a mate, although very briefly. It ended our friendship in the end.

Pretty much because he is a massive cunt

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"

Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now.

I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again.

I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna."

To be fair there seems to be more issues that you are not happy with than just her catching you in her room but none of them have anything to do with the woman wanting privacy in the room your have let her have.

Are you upset more that she has felt the need to check how many times you go into her room when she is not there or the fact she knows you went in because of what she has set up?

Yes you have done a lovely thing by helping someone out but if it came with conditions then maybe that should have been discussed when she moved in.

Either way it sounds like it isn't working so maybe time to let her find somewhere else to live

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh Pp I really feel for you, feeling uncomfortable in your own home isn’t on a d for that reason alone it’s time for her to leave. Now as to the other issues she has taken your generosity and Good nature for granted, she should have asked before she had her boyfriend stay and the fact that she smokes when you’ve asked her not to shows a complete disregard for you. You’ve done more than you should have for her now is the time to do what’s best for you. X

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"

Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now.

I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again.

I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna.

To be fair there seems to be more issues that you are not happy with than just her catching you in her room but none of them have anything to do with the woman wanting privacy in the room your have let her have.

Are you upset more that she has felt the need to check how many times you go into her room when she is not there or the fact she knows you went in because of what she has set up?

Yes you have done a lovely thing by helping someone out but if it came with conditions then maybe that should have been discussed when she moved in.

Either way it sounds like it isn't working so maybe time to let her find somewhere else to live "

I'm upset because there's been a camera set up in my house without my knowledge.

I'm upset she deems it acceptable to use every room of my house, yet I get questioned over going in one of them.

I'm upset because now I'm wondering what she's hiding, is my tenancy being put in danger?

I'm upset that rather than talk to me if there's something bothering her, she's been sneaky in setting up a device to monitor my movement.

I reckon since her hamster died I've been in there maybe twice when she's not been here. That was February.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

After reading the rest....you don't have to put up with being unhappy and you sound unhappy with how it has been going ( even before the camera thing ) and as she isn't paying anything towards rent and I am guessing not on the tenancy agreement then I would tell her to find somewhere else to live. She has had long enough to help herself get some money together

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now.

I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again.

I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna.

To be fair there seems to be more issues that you are not happy with than just her catching you in her room but none of them have anything to do with the woman wanting privacy in the room your have let her have.

Are you upset more that she has felt the need to check how many times you go into her room when she is not there or the fact she knows you went in because of what she has set up?

Yes you have done a lovely thing by helping someone out but if it came with conditions then maybe that should have been discussed when she moved in.

Either way it sounds like it isn't working so maybe time to let her find somewhere else to live

I'm upset because there's been a camera set up in my house without my knowledge.

I'm upset she deems it acceptable to use every room of my house, yet I get questioned over going in one of them.

I'm upset because now I'm wondering what she's hiding, is my tenancy being put in danger?

I'm upset that rather than talk to me if there's something bothering her, she's been sneaky in setting up a device to monitor my movement.

I reckon since her hamster died I've been in there maybe twice when she's not been here. That was February. "

How would you feel if your kindness gets you kicked out by your landlord? That's too much upset for even the kindest person. Think of yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers.

Then why not tell me?

Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room?

Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera?

"

Humans are confrontational creatures maybe this way you'll pay her rent money

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"After reading the rest....you don't have to put up with being unhappy and you sound unhappy with how it has been going ( even before the camera thing ) and as she isn't paying anything towards rent and I am guessing not on the tenancy agreement then I would tell her to find somewhere else to live. She has had long enough to help herself get some money together"

Yeah I'm pretty miserable to be fair. I think trust and respect works both ways but it doesn't feel like it's happening.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"

Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now.

I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again.

I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna.

To be fair there seems to be more issues that you are not happy with than just her catching you in her room but none of them have anything to do with the woman wanting privacy in the room your have let her have.

Are you upset more that she has felt the need to check how many times you go into her room when she is not there or the fact she knows you went in because of what she has set up?

Yes you have done a lovely thing by helping someone out but if it came with conditions then maybe that should have been discussed when she moved in.

Either way it sounds like it isn't working so maybe time to let her find somewhere else to live

I'm upset because there's been a camera set up in my house without my knowledge.

I'm upset she deems it acceptable to use every room of my house, yet I get questioned over going in one of them.

I'm upset because now I'm wondering what she's hiding, is my tenancy being put in danger?

I'm upset that rather than talk to me if there's something bothering her, she's been sneaky in setting up a device to monitor my movement.

I reckon since her hamster died I've been in there maybe twice when she's not been here. That was February.

How would you feel if your kindness gets you kicked out by your landlord? That's too much upset for even the kindest person. Think of yourself. "

This is my major concern.

*big fucking sigh*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are always two sides to every story. The fact that she needs the feel to have a camera in her room might have triggered from your previous behaviour? Is she on fab?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"

Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now.

I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again.

I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna.

To be fair there seems to be more issues that you are not happy with than just her catching you in her room but none of them have anything to do with the woman wanting privacy in the room your have let her have.

Are you upset more that she has felt the need to check how many times you go into her room when she is not there or the fact she knows you went in because of what she has set up?

Yes you have done a lovely thing by helping someone out but if it came with conditions then maybe that should have been discussed when she moved in.

Either way it sounds like it isn't working so maybe time to let her find somewhere else to live

I'm upset because there's been a camera set up in my house without my knowledge.

I'm upset she deems it acceptable to use every room of my house, yet I get questioned over going in one of them.

I'm upset because now I'm wondering what she's hiding, is my tenancy being put in danger?

I'm upset that rather than talk to me if there's something bothering her, she's been sneaky in setting up a device to monitor my movement.

I reckon since her hamster died I've been in there maybe twice when she's not been here. That was February. "

You've perpetuated the not talking about issues though. It needs discussion and if she's the type who refuses to engage in discussion then she needs to know there is only one other option and Its the other side of the front door.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I'd suggest being the bigger person, even apologising for any upset or misunderstanding.

Then see if you can agree on a suitable protocol for going into each others private spaces (for innocent purposes,of course).

I'd say you would be quite justified in raising concern about the surveillance camera though.

Im presuming you want to stay friends so maybe the diplomatic option is best.

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I think I'd suggest being the bigger person, even apologising for any upset or misunderstanding.

Then see if you can agree on a suitable protocol for going into each others private spaces (for innocent purposes,of course).

I'd say you would be quite justified in raising concern about the surveillance camera though.

Im presuming you want to stay friends so maybe the diplomatic option is best.

"

I did apologise. As soon as she messaged me asking what I was looking for I apologised and told her, along with the reasoning I didn't ask her

( A - I was pretty certain I knew where it was, and went straight to it. Wasn't gonna go hunting if it wasn't where I thought.

B- She was in the hospital having her head glued after an accident at work)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think I'd suggest being the bigger person, even apologising for any upset or misunderstanding.

Then see if you can agree on a suitable protocol for going into each others private spaces (for innocent purposes,of course).

I'd say you would be quite justified in raising concern about the surveillance camera though.

Im presuming you want to stay friends so maybe the diplomatic option is best.

I did apologise. As soon as she messaged me asking what I was looking for I apologised and told her, along with the reasoning I didn't ask her

( A - I was pretty certain I knew where it was, and went straight to it. Wasn't gonna go hunting if it wasn't where I thought.

B- She was in the hospital having her head glued after an accident at work)

"

It seems to me that you've acted reasonably. It may still be a good idea to reach an agreement about going into each others rooms,to avoid the issue coming up again.

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By *eplicant JoWoman
over a year ago

Sussex countryside

I think it is time to ask her to leave.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She is your guest and in my humble has massively abused that privilege....

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By *rincess peach OP   Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Thanks all for your input.

It's certainly given me stuff to think about.

She's still not shown her face yet, so I'm guessing the "ignore it and it will go away" thought process has come to the fore.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot


"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd.

I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words

I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night

How long has she lived at yours?

Since September.

It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet.

Hmm. Too comfortable by half. Your good nature is being taken advantage of I fear."

This. ^

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