FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

I really don't reccomend...

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

...absent mindedly trying to scratch that itch up your nose when you've just eaten some really bloody hot and spicy wings! It burns so much!! (Really glad I didn't need a wee)

So what have you done by accident and instantly realised was not a brilliant idea?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It wasn't me, but when I was at uni I lived in a flat with 3 rugby lads who always felt the need to prove how hard they were when d*unk.

Until one day Dan thought it would be a good idea to whip down his pants and stick his knob in a jar of chillies.

To this day, I've still never heard a scream like it again....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It wasn't me, but when I was at uni I lived in a flat with 3 rugby lads who always felt the need to prove how hard they were when d*unk.

Until one day Dan thought it would be a good idea to whip down his pants and stick his knob in a jar of chillies.

To this day, I've still never heard a scream like it again...."

that's making me whince just reading that!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

Licking my way up the inside thigh of a guy who failed to inform me he'd been using Deep Heat on a football injury.

Couldnt feel my lips and tongue for about a week

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago

CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. Staffs. BARMOUTH. The Lakes (Monthly)

Accidentally squirted bleach into my eye. I was cleaning the bathroom, mixed bleach with an industrial cleaner, sprayed it into the upturned toilet seat.......it hit a knobble and rebounded into my eye.

Immediately I stuck my head under the cold tap for a few minutes, then sought medical advice. They smelt me entering A&E before they saw me. xxx Suzi

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Using immac on intimate areas (within the bikini line)... Oh the pain.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago

CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. Staffs. BARMOUTH. The Lakes (Monthly)


"Licking my way up the inside thigh of a guy who failed to inform me he'd been using Deep Heat on a football injury.

Couldnt feel my lips and tongue for about a week "

Sorry gotta giggle ....that reminds me of the time I left a tube by the toothpaste, and hubbs cleaned his teeth with it xxx Suzi

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The bottle of Cinzano. Osnabrück, Germany. My school exchange partner suggesting we go to that party. The thing that happened.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Licking my way up the inside thigh of a guy who failed to inform me he'd been using Deep Heat on a football injury.

Couldnt feel my lips and tongue for about a week "

Bleurgh! Aw that's just not considerate

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway


"Licking my way up the inside thigh of a guy who failed to inform me he'd been using Deep Heat on a football injury.

Couldnt feel my lips and tongue for about a week "

Oh gosh!!

My worst was being made to laugh whilst shotting Absinthe. I ended up with it coming out of my nose. It burned like a mofo

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan
over a year ago

.

There is a video going around on WhatsApp showing a work "mate" rubbing a chilli on toilet paper then the after affects of someone having wiped themselves

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A couple of times in the past, while I've been asleep, I must have had itchy balls. So I've scratched. In my state of unconsciousness, unknown to me being unconscious, I scratched for, I don't know how long. My skin was raw. I didn't realise until I got in the shower, and felt hot water on the red raw ball bag.

And there was the manscaping incident.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well i cant claim this was by accident because I used something exactly as it is marketed to be used.... but i tell ye one thing if i tell ye nowt else... Original Source Mint Tea Tree shower gel should come with a huge fuck off health warning on it.... jeez that stuff doesnt just "tingle" it chuffing well sets your chuff on fire and then laughs in your face!!

Evil witchcrafty stuff it is!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Took a bad reaction to some stray immac that caused my inner labia to swell like spaniels ears!

Had to take mega dose of Piroton for 2 days.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"There is a video going around on WhatsApp showing a work "mate" rubbing a chilli on toilet paper then the after affects of someone having wiped themselves

"

That. Is. Evil!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A couple of times in the past, while I've been asleep, I must have had itchy balls. So I've scratched. In my state of unconsciousness, unknown to me being unconscious, I scratched for, I don't know how long. My skin was raw. I didn't realise until I got in the shower, and felt hot water on the red raw ball bag.

And there was the manscaping incident."

Care to elaborate on that Jim?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Well i cant claim this was by accident because I used something exactly as it is marketed to be used.... but i tell ye one thing if i tell ye nowt else... Original Source Mint Tea Tree shower gel should come with a huge fuck off health warning on it.... jeez that stuff doesnt just "tingle" it chuffing well sets your chuff on fire and then laughs in your face!!

Evil witchcrafty stuff it is!! "

Ouchy wah wah!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *enithWoman
over a year ago

closer than you think

[Removed by poster at 06/07/18 22:08:23]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or your eye.

Or bumhole.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hear you, being there and for the wee!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *enithWoman
over a year ago

closer than you think


"Well i cant claim this was by accident because I used something exactly as it is marketed to be used.... but i tell ye one thing if i tell ye nowt else... Original Source Mint Tea Tree shower gel should come with a huge fuck off health warning on it.... jeez that stuff doesnt just "tingle" it chuffing well sets your chuff on fire and then laughs in your face!!

Evil witchcrafty stuff it is!! "

I can second that!!!! bloody evil stuff !!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well i cant claim this was by accident because I used something exactly as it is marketed to be used.... but i tell ye one thing if i tell ye nowt else... Original Source Mint Tea Tree shower gel should come with a huge fuck off health warning on it.... jeez that stuff doesnt just "tingle" it chuffing well sets your chuff on fire and then laughs in your face!!

Evil witchcrafty stuff it is!! "

I thought it was only me that stuff did that to. I was jumping around in the shower like a lunatic, trying to get it off.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well i cant claim this was by accident because I used something exactly as it is marketed to be used.... but i tell ye one thing if i tell ye nowt else... Original Source Mint Tea Tree shower gel should come with a huge fuck off health warning on it.... jeez that stuff doesnt just "tingle" it chuffing well sets your chuff on fire and then laughs in your face!!

Evil witchcrafty stuff it is!!

I can second that!!!! bloody evil stuff !!"

I wonder if anyone has told them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having a car accident

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lenderfoxMan
over a year ago

Leeds

Also not a good idea to put contact lenses in after chopping chillis...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

I thought it was a good idea to epilate my legs completely naked so my clothing didn't get in the way as I was leaning down over them.

One nipple caught in the blades later I realised I was mistaken

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Having a car accident "

This is most definitely not reccomended... But not exactly something you do absent mindedly either

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Also not a good idea to put contact lenses in after chopping chillis..."

Eyes streaming in sympathy (well, hayfever actually) for you there

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..


"Well i cant claim this was by accident because I used something exactly as it is marketed to be used.... but i tell ye one thing if i tell ye nowt else... Original Source Mint Tea Tree shower gel should come with a huge fuck off health warning on it.... jeez that stuff doesnt just "tingle" it chuffing well sets your chuff on fire and then laughs in your face!!

Evil witchcrafty stuff it is!! "

I love that stuff

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I thought it was a good idea to epilate my legs completely naked so my clothing didn't get in the way as I was leaning down over them.

One nipple caught in the blades later I realised I was mistaken "

ooooh that's another big whince! Although there'll be some kinksters looking at that post thoughtfully too I reckon

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Well i cant claim this was by accident because I used something exactly as it is marketed to be used.... but i tell ye one thing if i tell ye nowt else... Original Source Mint Tea Tree shower gel should come with a huge fuck off health warning on it.... jeez that stuff doesnt just "tingle" it chuffing well sets your chuff on fire and then laughs in your face!!

Evil witchcrafty stuff it is!!

I love that stuff "

Are we seeing your kinky side here Babs?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ookingforlustMan
over a year ago

northants

An old one, wearing a ring while putting nets up for a football match.

Recently, itching the corner of my eye while chopping chilli’s. Fuck me the burned like a bastard

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..

In the last month G3orgie these three things ....

I tried to reach up and lower the shower head (because I’m a shortie and my lovelies are all really tall) and I slipped in the wet shower, fell through the door of the cubicle and out of the shower onto the floor on my bum. Just missed hitting my head on the sink and had a very big bruise for weeks on my leg.

I know this one was karma but I was running through the house to do something I shouldn’t have been and on my way through I kicked the sofa and broke my toe!

Last weekend I tried to balance a king size mattress on my head whilst I rummaged around under it. It slipped off my head, hit my shoulder and knocked me to the floor. Bad back all week.

Hopefully that’s my three now

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"An old one, wearing a ring while putting nets up for a football match.

Recently, itching the corner of my eye while chopping chilli’s. Fuck me the burned like a bastard"

Ooooh that is indeed a barsteward of a mistake to make! On both counts

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"In the last month G3orgie these three things ....

I tried to reach up and lower the shower head (because I’m a shortie and my lovelies are all really tall) and I slipped in the wet shower, fell through the door of the cubicle and out of the shower onto the floor on my bum. Just missed hitting my head on the sink and had a very big bruise for weeks on my leg.

I know this one was karma but I was running through the house to do something I shouldn’t have been and on my way through I kicked the sofa and broke my toe!

Last weekend I tried to balance a king size mattress on my head whilst I rummaged around under it. It slipped off my head, hit my shoulder and knocked me to the floor. Bad back all week.

Hopefully that’s my three now "

Blimey Babs!!

But now I wanna know what you were running to do that you shouldn't have been...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..


"In the last month G3orgie these three things ....

I tried to reach up and lower the shower head (because I’m a shortie and my lovelies are all really tall) and I slipped in the wet shower, fell through the door of the cubicle and out of the shower onto the floor on my bum. Just missed hitting my head on the sink and had a very big bruise for weeks on my leg.

I know this one was karma but I was running through the house to do something I shouldn’t have been and on my way through I kicked the sofa and broke my toe!

Last weekend I tried to balance a king size mattress on my head whilst I rummaged around under it. It slipped off my head, hit my shoulder and knocked me to the floor. Bad back all week.

Hopefully that’s my three now

Blimey Babs!!

But now I wanna know what you were running to do that you shouldn't have been... "

Can’t tell you G3orgie. People will judge

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have done something similar.

Ate some hot chillies with my fingers then went for a piss without washing my hands first....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh dude, I’ve done this! It feels like your nose is going to drop off!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I have done something similar.

Ate some hot chillies with my fingers then went for a piss without washing my hands first...."

Hellish!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Oh dude, I’ve done this! It feels like your nose is going to drop off!"

Yup! I kinda wished it had at the time!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ookingforlustMan
over a year ago

northants


"An old one, wearing a ring while putting nets up for a football match.

Recently, itching the corner of my eye while chopping chilli’s. Fuck me the burned like a bastard

Ooooh that is indeed a barsteward of a mistake to make! On both counts "

Yep.

Perversely, having a chilli infused eyeball is far more painful than ripping a finger off

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Never...ever...EVER (!!) think it'll be a good idea to prepare for a meet by trimming your balls with a beard trimmer!! The moment the skin catches in the blades is just eye watering!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *tirluvMan
over a year ago

the right frame of mind -London


"Having a car accident

This is most definitely not reccomended... But not exactly something you do absent mindedly either"

Yes silly mistake - easily done, we all forget how we deliberately charge into these for the sheer unadulterated thrill of it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *tirluvMan
over a year ago

the right frame of mind -London

Breathing in toothpaste is possibly the most excruciating pain ever - it honestly feels like your lungs are on fire and someone is trying to scrape them clean with a rusty blunt razorblade - you can hardly breathe

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Apologies for finding these funny except for car crash.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *issminxandmrcCouple
over a year ago

Rotherham

Omg !! NITEMARES or what LOL

I'm sooo going to bloody make sure I always throw away the 1st 10 sheets of lou roll in any public Lou from now on Chillies Bloody Nora!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *issminxandmrcCouple
over a year ago

Rotherham

ME TOO PEEPS (so sorry for LOL'ing)

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top