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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? " if you didn't know it already I could teach you how to make a flower out of some florists wire, decoupage glue and nail varnish  | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? " Could tell you several useless facts in 5 minuets. Know loads of them. 
XX | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? if you didn't know it already I could teach you how to make a flower out of some florists wire, decoupage glue and nail varnish "I don’t know! And now I’d like to know. | |||
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"Ah. It’s not educational but instead entertaining. I could perform a mini poetry jam for you doll. In 5 minutes I can get through a load of poems! " Mac! I’d love that. I’d hit you with some Ogden Nash “The cow is of the bovine ilk, One end moo, the other milk.” | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? Could tell you several useless facts in 5 minuets. Know loads of them.
XX"Factfilledfun  | |||
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"I'd teach you to finger spell your name in BSL "I can do that, so instead let’s chitter chatter in BSL or make up fake names for other people  | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? " I'd probably just tell you about my porn collection or late 18th/early 19th century social housing in Birmingham. It's your choice. | |||
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"That Hitlers ambitions in the Soviet Union were not due to ideology, rather for military strategy purposes. You know because I’m a boring history buff! "“History just burps, and we taste again that raw-onion sandwich it swallowed centuries ago.” - Julian Barnes Made me think of that quote. | |||
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"How to set out a 4 centre drop arch with radiating joints "You’re speaking another language to me, I’ve no idea what this will be! Intriguing. Are we making a building arch of some description? | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? " Gravitational time dilation. Well I find it fascinating | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? " that you can reply politely to messages and not just delete them | |||
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"I'd teach you to finger spell your name in BSL
I can do that, so instead let’s chitter chatter in BSL or make up fake names for other people "Deal... It's nice to find somebody to use it with... Conversations with deaf 4 and 5 year olds can be quite limited | |||
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"I would play you two of my songs in that time on acoustic guitar." Oh! Fabulous. Did you write the songs yourself? I’d happily listen. | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? I'd probably just tell you about my porn collection or late 18th/early 19th century social housing in Birmingham. It's your choice." Talking about social housing *is* my porn, you don’t even know. #alreadydripping | |||
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"U would already know lol" I feel like there’s an [insert a sausage joke here] being implied. | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? Gravitational time dilation. Well I find it fascinating "I’d like to know more | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? that you can reply politely to messages and not just delete them" Me personally? | |||
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"I'd teach you to finger spell your name in BSL
I can do that, so instead let’s chitter chatter in BSL or make up fake names for other people
Deal... It's nice to find somebody to use it with... Conversations with deaf 4 and 5 year olds can be quite limited "
I’ll be dirty! | |||
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"I could teach you a sexy zumba routine, hot pants compulsory "Oh Christ! There’s so much in this proposal. | |||
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"I could share my sexy brownie recipe "And Mr Moriarty? (Joke) I like brownies  | |||
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"I can teach you how to make an origami lily " Awwwww. | |||
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"A brief history of where I live "That would be delightful. I’d like a doggy huggle too. | |||
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"Never heard that before, I like it! " | |||
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"How to change a punctured wheel on your car .....if you have one "Well, you see it was one of the first things my papa taught me! | |||
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"I could share my sexy brownie recipe
And Mr Moriarty?
(Joke)
I like brownies "Ha he's probably tastier than brownies to be fair! | |||
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"Ah. It’s not educational but instead entertaining. I could perform a mini poetry jam for you doll. In 5 minutes I can get through a load of poems! Mac! I’d love that. I’d hit you with some Ogden Nash “The cow is of the bovine ilk, One end moo, the other milk.”"
?There once was a woman called Gertie. ?
?She wasn't classy but always quite flirty. ?
?When Desmond popped by, she'd always cry,?
?I don't want my pants back they're dirty? | |||
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"I could share my sexy brownie recipe
And Mr Moriarty?
(Joke)
I like brownies
Ha he's probably tastier than brownies to be fair!"Hee hee!! | |||
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"How to change a punctured wheel on your car .....if you have one
Well, you see it was one of the first things my papa taught me! "O well worth a try  | |||
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"Good thread I could run through how to make a cracking curry "Nom nom nom!! | |||
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"Ah. It’s not educational but instead entertaining. I could perform a mini poetry jam for you doll. In 5 minutes I can get through a load of poems! Mac! I’d love that. I’d hit you with some Ogden Nash “The cow is of the bovine ilk, One end moo, the other milk.”
?There once was a woman called Gertie. ?
?She wasn't classy but always quite flirty. ?
?When Desmond popped by, she'd always cry,?
?I don't want my pants back they're dirty?"Gertie could probably sell them to be fair! | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? I'd probably just tell you about my porn collection or late 18th/early 19th century social housing in Birmingham. It's your choice. Talking about social housing *is* my porn, you don’t even know. #alreadydripping " I'm going to read some Lynsey Hanley to you, you'll be mine forever. | |||
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"How to change a punctured wheel on your car .....if you have one
Well, you see it was one of the first things my papa taught me!
O well worth a try "We could race each other changing tyres instead! | |||
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"The gentle dips and bows of the human clavicle... ...which would leave 4 minutes for the Gemini Man philosophy on all things Fab "I’d lose myself in your clavicle.  | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? I'd probably just tell you about my porn collection or late 18th/early 19th century social housing in Birmingham. It's your choice. Talking about social housing *is* my porn, you don’t even know. #alreadydripping I'm going to read some Lynsey Hanley to you, you'll be mine forever." Estates:an intimate history? Fuck yeah. | |||
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"I would play you two of my songs in that time on acoustic guitar. Oh! Fabulous. Did you write the songs yourself? I’d happily listen. " Yeah, got hundreds, recorded on 8 track, they’ll be discovered when I’m gone! | |||
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"How to make food more tasty. I'm a chef. Hubby god knows what he would say " I do like it when food is tasty. My body is testament to this. | |||
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"I would play you two of my songs in that time on acoustic guitar. Oh! Fabulous. Did you write the songs yourself? I’d happily listen. Yeah, got hundreds, recorded on 8 track, they’ll be discovered when I’m gone! "Right, here’s a challenge, post some to YouTube and link us (or me) in! I want to hear! | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? " The most basic foundation steps in Argentinian Tango. Or how to turn a length of cord into handcuffs quicker than you can say handcuffs. | |||
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"I could teach you a sexy zumba routine, hot pants compulsory
Oh Christ!
There’s so much in this proposal. "We would definitely need to shower after to
(We might need 2 x 5 mins) | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? The most basic foundation steps in Argentinian Tango. Or how to turn a length of cord into handcuffs quicker than you can say handcuffs. " Well here’s the issue for me, I have never been able to learn dances with expected and correct steps. Don’t get me wrong, I love to dance and I’m amazing, but I am a free dancer, virtually prophetic and am more in the flailing and interpretive style of the almighty Kate Bush.
I’ll go handcuffs. | |||
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"I'd teach you to finger spell your name in BSL "Damn. I was gonna say that.  | |||
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"I could teach you a sexy zumba routine, hot pants compulsory
Oh Christ!
There’s so much in this proposal.
We would definitely need to shower after to
(We might need 2 x 5 mins)"Deal. | |||
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"Oooo oooo i got one id teach... No wait you prob know that too this is so hard "Tell me | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? I'd probably just tell you about my porn collection or late 18th/early 19th century social housing in Birmingham. It's your choice. Talking about social housing *is* my porn, you don’t even know. #alreadydripping I'm going to read some Lynsey Hanley to you, you'll be mine forever. Estates:an intimate history? Fuck yeah." Well yeah but I couldn't read that in 5 minutes so I'd probaby go for one of her Guardian articles. Estates is a good read mind - just not what I'd reach for if I'd been 3 days inactive. | |||
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"I'd teach you to finger spell your name in BSL
Damn. I was gonna say that. "Come join our filth BSL chat | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? I'd probably just tell you about my porn collection or late 18th/early 19th century social housing in Birmingham. It's your choice. Talking about social housing *is* my porn, you don’t even know. #alreadydripping I'm going to read some Lynsey Hanley to you, you'll be mine forever. Estates:an intimate history? Fuck yeah. Well yeah but I couldn't read that in 5 minutes so I'd probaby go for one of her Guardian articles. Estates is a good read mind - just not what I'd reach for if I'd been 3 days inactive." | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? The most basic foundation steps in Argentinian Tango. Or how to turn a length of cord into handcuffs quicker than you can say handcuffs. Well here’s the issue for me, I have never been able to learn dances with expected and correct steps. Don’t get me wrong, I love to dance and I’m amazing, but I am a free dancer, virtually prophetic and am more in the flailing and interpretive style of the almighty Kate Bush.
I’ll go handcuffs. "Kate Bush used to live about 15 minutes from me, not sure if she still does. 
Argentinian Tango is one of the hardest activities I've ever done. And the style I'm studying is the hardest style. Didn't tell me that when I started, bastardos.
Cuffs it is..... | |||
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"Oooo oooo i got one id teach... No wait you prob know that too this is so hard
Tell me"How i can draw a snake upon your back and end it with a dot liiiiiiiike | |||
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"I would play you two of my songs in that time on acoustic guitar. Oh! Fabulous. Did you write the songs yourself? I’d happily listen. Yeah, got hundreds, recorded on 8 track, they’ll be discovered when I’m gone!
Right, here’s a challenge, post some to YouTube and link us (or me) in! I want to hear!"I’m going to try to put them on Soundcloud, I’ll give you a link when I’ve figured it out. | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? The most basic foundation steps in Argentinian Tango. Or how to turn a length of cord into handcuffs quicker than you can say handcuffs. Well here’s the issue for me, I have never been able to learn dances with expected and correct steps. Don’t get me wrong, I love to dance and I’m amazing, but I am a free dancer, virtually prophetic and am more in the flailing and interpretive style of the almighty Kate Bush.
I’ll go handcuffs.
Kate Bush used to live about 15 minutes from me, not sure if she still does.
Argentinian Tango is one of the hardest activities I've ever done. And the style I'm studying is the hardest style. Didn't tell me that when I started, bastardos.
Cuffs it is..... " | |||
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"Oooo oooo i got one id teach... No wait you prob know that too this is so hard
Tell me
How i can draw a snake upon your back and end it with a dot liiiiiiiike " | |||
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"I would play you two of my songs in that time on acoustic guitar. Oh! Fabulous. Did you write the songs yourself? I’d happily listen. Yeah, got hundreds, recorded on 8 track, they’ll be discovered when I’m gone!
Right, here’s a challenge, post some to YouTube and link us (or me) in! I want to hear!
I’m going to try to put them on Soundcloud, I’ll give you a link when I’ve figured it out. " | |||
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"Could show you where to put your fingers to make sweet music. I mean I can teach you basic guitar chords "I’d love to learn to play guitar. That’s a real wish of mine | |||
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"How to hold and start playing a saxophone " I can play tenor and alto already! | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? " Show you how to remove a cork from a bottle of wine without touching the cork or damaging the bottle.( 2 mins.) Then after we had consumed it... After pushing the cirk back into the bottle undamaged, show you how to remove it using what's on the restaurant table and without damaging either the Cork or the bottle. ( 2 mins) And for the last minute we'd just kiss..  | |||
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"Could show you where to put your fingers to make sweet music. I mean I can teach you basic guitar chords
I’d love to learn to play guitar. That’s a real wish of mine " | |||
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"How to hold and start playing a saxophone I can play tenor and alto already!" I play tenor. Can teach you the 3 fingers required to make music on a brass instrument | |||
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"Could show you where to put your fingers to make sweet music. I mean I can teach you basic guitar chords
I’d love to learn to play guitar. That’s a real wish of mine "Sure be good to have your hand sliding up n down my frets | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? Show you how to remove a cork from a bottle of wine without touching the cork or damaging the bottle.( 2 mins.) Then after we had consumed it... After pushing the cirk back into the bottle undamaged, show you how to remove it using what's on the restaurant table and without damaging either the Cork or the bottle. ( 2 mins) And for the last minute we'd just kiss.. "What a corker of a plan! | |||
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"How to hold and start playing a saxophone I can play tenor and alto already! I play tenor. Can teach you the 3 fingers required to make music on a brass instrument " | |||
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"Could show you where to put your fingers to make sweet music. I mean I can teach you basic guitar chords
I’d love to learn to play guitar. That’s a real wish of mine Sure be good to have your hand sliding up n down my frets"Filth. | |||
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"You are getting some great offers. I think I would sing 'I could write a book' to you and then make you cheese on toast. If you didn't like the song, the cheese on toast might distract you. " It most certainly would! | |||
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"I'd rather inspire you with some wisdom. " Ooooh yes please! | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? " Depends how smart you are? | |||
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"Where to get the best cheddar like, ev-er!" TELL ME NOW!! | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? Depends how smart you are?" Very. | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? Depends how smart you are? Very." In that case I will tell you how to never fail any job interview | |||
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"How to set out a 4 centre drop arch with radiating joints
You’re speaking another language to me, I’ve no idea what this will be! Intriguing. Are we making a building arch of some description?"Yes I am a stonemason | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? Depends how smart you are? Very. In that case I will tell you how to never fail any job interview" That would be useful. Especially as a lot of my work is helping people to know exactly how to get jobs! I never knew there was a single golden rule! | |||
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"How to set out a 4 centre drop arch with radiating joints
You’re speaking another language to me, I’ve no idea what this will be! Intriguing. Are we making a building arch of some description?
Yes I am a stonemason " | |||
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"That all screwdrivers don't fit all screws... " I have Makita tool set and am a DIY guru. | |||
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"How to make a rose out of a paper napkin." 
You ol’ charmer, you. | |||
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"How to relax and caress nature. "Treehugging? | |||
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"How to pull a perfect pint of real ale" Now this I can do too! I worked bars throughout my university years | |||
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"How to make food more tasty. I'm a chef. Hubby god knows what he would say I do like it when food is tasty. My body is testament to this. "Tasty food tasty body | |||
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"How to relax and caress nature.
Treehugging?"Sort of. | |||
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"How to pull a perfect pint of real ale Now this I can do too! I worked bars throughout my university years "A southern pint is different to a northern one, the northern pint has to have a sparkler and the head has to be the correct thickness | |||
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"How to pull a perfect pint of real ale Now this I can do too! I worked bars throughout my university years A southern pint is different to a northern one, the northern pint has to have a sparkler and the head has to be the correct thickness "I cannot see any double entendre in that. | |||
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"How to make food more tasty. I'm a chef. Hubby god knows what he would say I do like it when food is tasty. My body is testament to this.
Tasty food tasty body " | |||
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"How to relax and caress nature.
Treehugging?
Sort of. "Oooooh | |||
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"You have 4 mins to live ??????"  | |||
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"How to pull a perfect pint of real ale Now this I can do too! I worked bars throughout my university years A southern pint is different to a northern one, the northern pint has to have a sparkler and the head has to be the correct thickness "I was pulling them in Durham | |||
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"the tragedy of darth plagueis the wise.... if you get it, you get it " | |||
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"I'd probably waffle about the futility of trying to sleep when the stupid old brain won't shut up. But most likely meander off on a tangent within a minute and be enthusing about how good the new Luke Cage is on Netflix before I move to lamenting upon the fragility of ones sensibilities when you tell yourself it is all okay when you really know it ain't! But a lot of that is probably down to lack of sleep "Shall I just distract you with a kiss? | |||
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"I'd probably waffle about the futility of trying to sleep when the stupid old brain won't shut up. But most likely meander off on a tangent within a minute and be enthusing about how good the new Luke Cage is on Netflix before I move to lamenting upon the fragility of ones sensibilities when you tell yourself it is all okay when you really know it ain't! But a lot of that is probably down to lack of sleep
Shall I just distract you with a kiss?"Thank you kindly | |||
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"I'd probably waffle about the futility of trying to sleep when the stupid old brain won't shut up. But most likely meander off on a tangent within a minute and be enthusing about how good the new Luke Cage is on Netflix before I move to lamenting upon the fragility of ones sensibilities when you tell yourself it is all okay when you really know it ain't! But a lot of that is probably down to lack of sleep
Shall I just distract you with a kiss?
Thank you kindly"Now settle down, I’m going to kiss you deeply and slowly and you have nothing else to concentrate on. Oh and I smell of freshly laundered sheets and rose petals, and taste like honeycomb and all things virtuous. | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? Could tell you several useless facts in 5 minuets. Know loads of them.
XX"I’m guessing you meant minutes not minuets which were 18th-century courtly dances lol! On the other hand, if you did mean minuets, hey, that’s impressive! | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? Depends how smart you are? Very. In that case I will tell you how to never fail any job interview That would be useful. Especially as a lot of my work is helping people to know exactly how to get jobs! I never knew there was a single golden rule! " Not one rule, there’re 3 things you MUST do to guarantee success that you dont know maybe. One of them includes a glass of water. I got 11/11 interviews, thats 100%... | |||
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"If I’m completely honest I would probably spend all 5 minutes trying my luck "Ha! And how would that go? What are your moves? | |||
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"I'd teach you how to use a sewing machine " Do you want to show me on my Janome machine? | |||
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"I would recite as many limericks about your beauty as I could in a bold attempt to humour and seduce you in one fell swoop! For example: There was a young lady Estella, Whose fabbing on fab was quite stellar, She was so hot n horny, Tho’I know it sounds corny, She’d no problem finding a fella!!! "Haha, oh if only it were true though! | |||
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"She started a 5 minute thread To seduce a nice guy to her bed I said I'd come round quite nifty She said "no, you're past fifty" And went with a young guy instead" We’ll always have social housing | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? " the benefits of playing squash for a healthy heart and fit body | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? Depends how smart you are? Very. In that case I will tell you how to never fail any job interview That would be useful. Especially as a lot of my work is helping people to know exactly how to get jobs! I never knew there was a single golden rule! Not one rule, there’re 3 things you MUST do to guarantee success that you dont know maybe. One of them includes a glass of water. I got 11/11 interviews, thats 100%..." I am intrigued but dubious! | |||
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"I’d teach you how to do a terrible Alan Rickman impression. " Needed. | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? the benefits of playing squash for a healthy heart and fit body "But it’s so fast!! | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? if you didn't know it already I could teach you how to make a flower out of some florists wire, decoupage glue and nail varnish " | |||
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"How to do the perfect winged eye liner" Oooh yes! | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? the benefits of playing squash for a healthy heart and fit body
But it’s so fast!!"yes but oh my love to watch you running around | |||
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"I just passed the giraffes!! Hurrah!! "In under 5 mins i could pm you a direct photo of my giraffe | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? " I can teach you how to make a latte/flat white/cappuccino or an aeropress coffee. | |||
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"Proper pronounciation of welsh words" Oh this I would struggle with. | |||
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"How to cannulate and take blood "Our local phlebotomist curses when I come in, he always has to take it out the back of my hand! | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? the benefits of playing squash for a healthy heart and fit body
But it’s so fast!!yes but oh my love to watch you running around "That would be the world’s unsexiest sight! | |||
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"I cood teatch you how to do the perfect omlit in 5 mins "Eggcellent | |||
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"I just passed the giraffes!! Hurrah!!
In under 5 mins i could pm you a direct photo of my giraffe "Fnarr fnarr! | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? I can teach you how to make a latte/flat white/cappuccino or an aeropress coffee. "Men and their coffee gadgetry! | |||
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"Proper pronounciation of welsh words Oh this I would struggle with. " Spelled phonetically to help you | |||
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"I could teach you a sexy zumba routine, hot pants compulsory "Can I come too | |||
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"Proper pronounciation of welsh words Oh this I would struggle with. Spelled phonetically to help you "Much appreciated | |||
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"I could teach you a sexy zumba routine, hot pants compulsory
Can I come too "Of course! | |||
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"How to cannulate and take blood
Our local phlebotomist curses when I come in, he always has to take it out the back of my hand! "Haha my veins are like beautiful apparently. I’m a bleeder! | |||
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"5 mins? I’d attempt to teach you the moonwalk " winning! | |||
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"How to cannulate and take blood
Our local phlebotomist curses when I come in, he always has to take it out the back of my hand!
Haha my veins are like beautiful apparently. I’m a bleeder!"Lucky you took two and a half hours and 3 differant nurses to find mine for transfusion | |||
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"How to cannulate and take blood
Our local phlebotomist curses when I come in, he always has to take it out the back of my hand!
Haha my veins are like beautiful apparently. I’m a bleeder!"I’m obviously a stone. | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? the benefits of playing squash for a healthy heart and fit body
But it’s so fast!!yes but oh my love to watch you running around
That would be the world’s unsexiest sight!"let me be judge....... Pleaseeeeee | |||
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"I could teach you a tap timestep." Let’s incorporate this into our seduction of Lib. | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? the benefits of playing squash for a healthy heart and fit body
But it’s so fast!!yes but oh my love to watch you running around
That would be the world’s unsexiest sight!let me be judge....... Pleaseeeeee "Some people are odd! | |||
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"I can teach you to twerk and do the floss lol "Amazing!! | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? the benefits of playing squash for a healthy heart and fit body
But it’s so fast!!yes but oh my love to watch you running around
That would be the world’s unsexiest sight!let me be judge....... Pleaseeeeee
Some people are odd!"welcome to the world of odd swinging....... You will trust me come across many odd things here | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? " How to throw a jab correctly | |||
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"I could teach you a tap timestep. Let’s incorporate this into our seduction of Lib. " I think he would prefer a lap dance | |||
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"Suck bananaman’s cock to get your 1 of 5 a day "She said five minutes bananaman, unless she’s the a bj queen and deepthroat expert she surely cant make you cum in that time..? | |||
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"I just passed the giraffes!! Hurrah!!
In under 5 mins i could pm you a direct photo of my giraffe
Fnarr fnarr!"Your loss | |||
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"Not one rule, there’re 3 things you MUST do to guarantee success that you dont know maybe." Guarantee success? What happens when everyone interviewing does these three things? | |||
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"Not one rule, there’re 3 things you MUST do to guarantee success that you dont know maybe. Guarantee success? What happens when everyone interviewing does these three things?" The world implodes. | |||
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"What could you teach me, or educate/tell me about if we had 5 minutes? I can teach you how to make a latte/flat white/cappuccino or an aeropress coffee.
Men and their coffee gadgetry! "Hey, being a barista as a trade gets results lol | |||
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