FabSwingers.com forum: Stock message response

By *iSTARess OP Woman
over a year ago

London

I used to reply to all messages out of politeness but it's too much Fabmin. However I have a couple of stock messages that my phone automatically regonises;

"Thanks hun but alas we're not a match" (for the ones who've read my profile and seem decent)

"Try reading profiles you dingbat. Zero interest in unsolicited knob pics. This ain't Instashag" (for the Zombie Wanking Squad)

Do you have any?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I used to reply to all messages out of politeness but it's too much Fabmin. However I have a couple of stock messages that my phone automatically regonises;

"Thanks hun but alas we're not a match" (for the ones who've read my profile and seem decent)

"Try reading profiles you dingbat. Zero interest in unsolicited knob pics. This ain't Instashag" (for the Zombie Wanking Squad)

Do you have any?

No but these are quality

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

Wish I had one. Might write one in my notes and copy and paste it. See how I get on

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By *otsoSnowWhiteWoman
over a year ago

My Ice Castle! South Wales

As soon as I type "not my" it's starts suggesting the rest of the sentence

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did a copy and paste reply to be nice and got stuff back like it was only a compliment I didn't ask to meet. I gave up and employed a hunky secretary whom I pay in kind to answer my messages and even he gets frustrated and deletes them sometimes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you for you query regarding sliding on Lib's shaft. I'm afraid he is not available at the moment but your message has been placed in a queue, and he will get back to you as soon as he can.

**Your place in the queue is #69**"

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By *KMaxMan
over a year ago

Bristol

No, but I am thinking of getting stock messages to send out.

'Phwoaarr, nice tits

'Fancy a fuck'

'My cock is massive

That kinda thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes it is a nice cock cheers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

anyone wanna write me a stock turn down response?

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

“Thankyou for the message. It is with regret that I have to inform you that your message made me roll my eyes*/You remind me of a young John Merrick/ You live 350 miles away*/I really can’t be arsed*

*Delete as applicable

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My phone- shit that it is-auto completes my sentences.

I write not, and it adds, what I'm looking for sorry.

I write no, and it adds, thank you.

It's not a total cunt.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Thankyou for the message. It is with regret that I have to inform you that your message made me roll my eyes*/You remind me of a young John Merrick/ You live 350 miles away*/I really can’t be arsed*

*Delete as applicable "

Love it

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By *ools47Woman
over a year ago

Failsworth

I shudder at the thought of FABmin

Even the read, look at profile delete can be tedious.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

My usual polite response for a 'no' is:

Thanks for your message but you are too far away for me.

Or thanks for your message but I'm not interested if I'm feeling slightly feisty.

Or thanks for your message but it might help to read messages before your cock takes over if its the time of the month and I'm in a mood.

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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago

Slough Windsor ish

If they are ok..."Thanks for messaging, it would be lovely to meet socially but we are not meeting for the time being. Feel free to hotlist us and keep an eye on our status, it will say when and where we are next off to a club"

For the meet now types... " Thanks but we only meet at clubs, we will update our status when we have plans to go next"

If they just randomly 'hi wuu2'..."Thanks, I've read your profile, did you read ours? It might help if you do

Or finally

For the 'I love your profile you look so sexy'... "Wow! Thank you! You have made my day! It's the cup isn't it? Hot right? Cath Kidstons finest porcelain, dishwasher and microwave proof too! I know, I'm blessed..."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...the Zombie Wanking Squad..."

Love that show.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We always get wow u look sexy

And return

Yep it's the beard and tattoos isn't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ours is sorry you’re too young for us. X

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

No thankyou.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"anyone wanna write me a stock turn down response?"

How about thanks but no thanks.. polite but to the point and it works for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I shudder at the thought of FABmin

Even the read, look at profile delete can be tedious. "

Must be tough being so popular!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a couple saved in my phone. I get nice replies.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s twice as long if you cut it in half, thanks for the enquiry again Phil.

Thanks in advance X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mines is

Aww thank you. We aren't meeting for a good wee while but have a lovely day

I've never had a rude reply from that x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it's a decent message, my usual is "Thanks for the message, but you're not really my type sorry x" or "you're too far away".

If it's an idiot message and I'm in a mood then I'll often go with "Oh my gosh! What an attractive and engaging message! Thank you so much!!" etc etc. Amazing how often people take that at face value though

Sometimes I'm quite blunt, like "Why the fuck don't twats like you read profiles" or "What the fuck about my profile made you think that I would want a semi-literate, crude crappy message and cock photo. Piss off."

If I'm in a really pissed off mood or they've been exceptionally ignorant I might lay into their profile for good measure

I'm not always horrible. Honest

Forty-nine times out of fifty I'll send a polite reply or just ignore.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I enjoy copying and pasting their exact message back to them. And then copying and pasting their response to that back to them. And so on.

Only one person is still going. I might shag him for the sheer determination.

Patience really is the key (to my foofananny).

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

#sorry..

lol no messing here..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That was quite therapeutic. Can we have more threads like this?

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

"That was quite therapeutic. Can we have more threads like this?

"
#sorry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And woman wonder why they get rude replies back. I'd be rude if I got some of they replies back too x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And woman wonder why they get rude replies back. I'd be rude if I got some of they replies back too x"

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By *uzie69xTV/TS
over a year ago

Maidstone

If I am feeling good / generous I don't actually bother replying.

If I am feeling narky I say... "Your profile doesn't say you are Looking for TV/TS. I don't want to be your DLS (Dirty Little Secret).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never had abuse in return to a polite "No thanks", or very rarely anyway. It seems to happen frequently to others though, going by threads and posts that pop up here quite a lot. So I don't know how far you can blame stroppy refusals for guys getting rude or nasty.

Honestly, some of the messages that guys send every day. It's like walking up to someone in the pub with your cock out and saying "Hey babe wanna come out to the car park and suck me off?"

Surely it must be plain to anyone who even skims my profile that I don't like cock photos and I don't like crude one-liners, and I'm not here looking for a shag in the back of some guy's car while his wife or gf thinks he's at work.

I'm not going to feel bad if my temper gets the better of me occasionally and I tell them exactly what I think of such messages.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"anyone wanna write me a stock turn down response?"

I'm so horny I'd fuck almost anyone right now"(to get there hopes up)

And then "I did say almost anyone, fuck off"!!

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

No thanks, good luck though.

My predictive text spits it out as soon as I type "No"!

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

I heard a good one last week, it was while we all chatting at a social & to my shame I can't remember who said it, but I've used it several times since

"Thank you for your message but after reviewing your profile, you do not meet my needs or preferences"

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By *iSTARess OP Woman
over a year ago

London

"I enjoy copying and pasting their exact message back to them. And then copying and pasting their response to that back to them. And so on.

Only one person is still going. I might shag him for the sheer determination.

Patience really is the key (to my foofananny)."

Bwahahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I heard a good one last week, it was while we all chatting at a social & to my shame I can't remember who said it, but I've used it several times since

"Thank you for your message but after reviewing your profile, you do not meet my needs or preferences" "

That's a good one

It sounds so automated and impersonal like a job rejection. I might just change needs for requirements and my for our

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

"I heard a good one last week, it was while we all chatting at a social & to my shame I can't remember who said it, but I've used it several times since

"Thank you for your message but after reviewing your profile, you do not meet my needs or preferences"

That's a good one

It sounds so automated and impersonal like a job rejection. I might just change needs for requirements and my for our

I like your adaptions..

I've just used it, on someone 8" shorter than me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine is very simple.....

“ Thank you for your message , please send me a message when you’re in NYC “

“ thank you for your message, but I don’t play on cam “

These usually results in a friend request ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I heard a good one last week, it was while we all chatting at a social & to my shame I can't remember who said it, but I've used it several times since

"Thank you for your message but after reviewing your profile, you do not meet my needs or preferences"

That's a good one

It sounds so automated and impersonal like a job rejection. I might just change needs for requirements and my for our

I like your adaptions..

I've just used it, on someone 8" shorter than me

I'll save it for the idiots. It will make a change from swearing at them

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By *iSTARess OP Woman
over a year ago

London

Would be nice if there was an automatic unsolicited knob block function on here (for those who don't want to see them).

I don't mind perusing them on a profile but don't appreciate being flashed by flacid members

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would be nice if there was an automatic unsolicited knob block function on here (for those who don't want to see them).

I don't mind perusing them on a profile but don't appreciate being flashed by flacid members

That would be fantastic. I really don't like cock photos or any other explicit genital pics tbh. Especially when you open a pm and there they are putting you right off your breakfast.

Seeing as you have to categorise photos when you upload them, it would be great if explicit pics were hidden by default even in PMs, so that you have to actively click on them to see it.

Damn I already did the survey as well.

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