FabSwingers.com forum: Getting the shitty end of the stick

By *ubiousOatcake OP Man
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

I took my dog for a walk earlier.

She did her business (as dogs do). Now, I always carry a bundle of poo-bags, but as it was next to the overgrowth, I thought I’d instead go for the recommended option of flicking it into the nettles with a stick.

All was going well until I went for the last bit. The stick bent, then broke, somersaulting in the air. And, before my conscious brain could draw attention to the obvious problem, my instinct kicked in and I reflexively grabbed the stick out of the air.

And, if the thread title wasn’t already obvious to you, that’s what happened. That phrase is more often figurative. For me it was literal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

but well done on having a go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You've made me chuckle. Thank you OP

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Well thats a bit shit

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Shit happens.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Laughing..

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Kinda serves you right for not picking it up and disposing of it properly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And my crush endeth.

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By *eplicant JoWoman
over a year ago

Sussex countryside

*snigger* ewwww

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

did you retch? I would have!

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

"And my crush endeth. "

Lmao.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was it the hand in the photo at the top of the page ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Could have hit you square in the forehead and stuck there - thank your lucky stars

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By *s_macWoman
over a year ago

Traffic land

"Could have hit you square in the forehead and stuck there - thank your lucky stars

This is what I thought and had it been me, likely what would have happened

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By *itvclaireTV/TS
over a year ago

Birmingham

Could be worse OP I’ve instinctively grabbed a falling blow tourch I’d just turned off. Yes I caught it by nozzle. Then very quickly let go.

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

So that’s why you were so keen to shake hands?

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

At least it was your own dogs poo so not soo bad really

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By *ubiousOatcake OP Man
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"Kinda serves you right for not picking it up and disposing of it properly. "

You’re not familiar with the fact that dog owners are being encouraged to do this, then.

did you retch? I would have! "

Nah. Your own dogs poop is like children or farts; your own are tolerable.

"Was it the hand in the photo at the top of the page ? "

That’s the one. A light smear across the base of the thumb, there.

"And my crush endeth. "

NNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Naughty man...pick it up no matter where it is!?

Did you walk home with your hand wrapped in the poo bag

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yawn

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And my crush endeth. "

Give him a second chance....he's worth over looking a wee bit of dog shite for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How do you answer all the questions in one box dubious oatcake sir ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And my crush endeth.

NNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

https://youtu.be/DKgcThjYBHs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And my crush endeth.

Give him a second chance....he's worth over looking a wee bit of dog shite for

Don’t worry. He’s still pulled.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm going to train my dogs to shit amongst the nettles. No more swinging a bag of dog shit as we walk to the bin for me.

I hope you washed your hands properly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And my crush endeth.

Give him a second chance....he's worth over looking a wee bit of dog shite for

Don’t worry. He’s still pulled.

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By *uzzy NavelWoman
over a year ago

so near and yet so far....

Ha ha that made me laugh thank you OP x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yawn"

Have you any stories to tell ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yawn

Have you any stories to tell ?"

Who are you??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yawn"

So you’ve come from the thread where you were struggling to not resort to personal attacks when someone showed disagreement with your view, in order to troll the OP here now? That’s far more soporific then the story of the shitty stick, I reckon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yawn

Have you any stories to tell ?

Who are you??"

Hi I’m Tom, who are you ?

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By *ubiousOatcake OP Man
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"Naughty man...pick it up no matter where it is!?"

Like I say, I’m a committed poo picker upper. I’ve always got enough bags to pick up my own dog's poo, even if she ends up going twice, and occasionally pick up other dogs’ poos I find if people are likely to trod in it. But, the government are encouraging the ‘stick and flick’ method in certain circumstances. Given how my first attempt went, I’ll be sticking to baggies.

"Did you walk home with your hand wrapped in the poo bag

Oh, ffs, why did I not think of this?

"Yawn"

Give us a kiss, sugartits.

"How do you answer all the questions in one box dubious oatcake sir ? "

In this instance; hit reply+quote, type out the reply, select all, copy, hit the back button, find the next post, hit reply+quote, paste the text, type the reply to the next post, select all, copy, etc. Other times, if there are longer paragraphs, I’ll copy the text and paste it into my notes app, edit the text, add in the quote tags manually, and then copy and paste the whole lot into the text edit box.

No, I don’t have a life.

I did like the ‘sir’ on the end. I need more of that. Take note, Estella.

"I hope you washed your hands properly."

Rubbing my hand on the grass seemed to do the trick.

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

"Kinda serves you right for not picking it up and disposing of it properly.

You’re not familiar with the fact that dog owners are being encouraged to do this, then.

Not where we live it isn't, bag it and bin it free poo bags from the council plus if you use I guide dogs how the hell are you going to flick it away?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And my crush endeth.

Give him a second chance....he's worth over looking a wee bit of dog shite for

Quick hand wash and ready to go

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

"I'm going to train my dogs to shit amongst the nettles. No more swinging a bag of dog shit as we walk to the bin for me.

I hope you washed your hands properly."

Do dogs get Nettle stings on their bums do you think ?

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By *ubiousOatcake OP Man
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"Not where we live it isn't, bag it and bin it free poo bags from the council plus if you use I guide dogs how the hell are you going to flick it away?"

It’s not in every circumstance, but it is nationwide. If your dog shits in the middle of the pavement, there’s nowhere to flick it. So, it has to be picked up. That’s why every council gives away free poo bags, not just where you live.

However, if you’re out in nature, and the poo can be flicked into undergrowth where it can do no harm, they’re encouraging dog owners to do that. Even biodegradable bags take an age to degrade. Faeces exposed to the elements will be gone long before faeces protected in a plastic bag.

And no, of course guide dog users can’t flick it away. They’re not great behind the wheel of a car, either, but we still recommend drivers stick to twenty in a residential zone.

I really didn’t intend this to be a discussion on picking up poo. But, if you’d like to read my other responses in the thread, it might give you a bit of context.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did like the ‘sir’ on the end. I need more of that. Take note, Estella.

Now I’m just playing Knights of the Round Table in my head.

Sir Mononthemount - A knight to remember.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A knight who rises to the top like a floater - Sir Faeces

(Is my lame homage to the thread and the game of KotRT)

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