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‘Horny and bored’ - status updates

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Have a wank and tidy your house then!

No one gives a shit mate.

What status updates grind your gears?

(I know this has been done before, but fuck ‘em)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any sycophantic update ending with the words “you know who you are”

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

As if horny and bored would do much other than repel - some people need to think with their brain.

Another one 'is it worth me staying here?'.

Obvious answer isn't usually what they do though, as a similar post gets repeated

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone fancy going for some food

The implication being that whoever says yes will be paying

There’s a few local who do that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any that contain a reference to something that's supposed to have taken place involving an unknown person who is addressed, but not named - along the lines of

"Wow, what a fantastic night, I've never been so wet. So glad I met you - you know who you are." Etc, etc...

Or alluding to some event that might be happening in the future, such as "Thinking what to wear for our meet tonight, can't wait." Blah blah...

The biggest issue is that they tend to be so mundane. If they said something along the lines of

"Wow, amazing night, I thought I'd never get the goat's blood off the curtains" or "Time to force a Seville orange into my rectum, ready for my big finale", they'd be worth reading.

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

[Removed by poster at 14/06/18 08:40:18]

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By *arkman69Man
over a year ago

Erdington

"Leaving this site". If you're leaving then just leave! I know someone who was "leaving" for about three months last year, and they're still here now!

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

Status updated reminding everyone what day of the week it was and how many days to go before the weekend - so glad that they do this, without this information I'd be constantly turning up to work on the wrong day.

Or, updates saying that they've just had sex with their partner... good for you!

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

A Seville orange? You said it should be a butternut squash

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By *ulfilthmentMan
over a year ago

Just around the corner

“Who’s going to send me a membership code?”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A Seville orange? You said it should be a butternut squash "

No, that's Tuesdays. Today is Citrus Thursday.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The ones like,

Need a generous FB or sugar daddy required

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area


"

The biggest issue is that they tend to be so mundane. If they said something along the lines of

"Wow, amazing night, I thought I'd never get the goat's blood off the curtains" or "Time to force a Seville orange into my rectum, ready for my big finale", they'd be worth reading."

Now here's a good idea for a thread 'Alternative Status Updates'

"Only one day to go untill the weekend... last one before the apocalypse"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

The biggest issue is that they tend to be so mundane. If they said something along the lines of

"Wow, amazing night, I thought I'd never get the goat's blood off the curtains" or "Time to force a Seville orange into my rectum, ready for my big finale", they'd be worth reading.

Now here's a good idea for a thread 'Alternative Status Updates'

"Only one day to go untill the weekend... last one before the apocalypse""

Done.

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