FabSwingers.com forum: Just said no to a higher paid salary

By *..TheCurvyPetrolHead... OP Woman
over a year ago

St Helens

In a nutshell I used to work in South East for a company and was paid £37k. Had a large mortgage and nice but small house. But very stressful job. Sold house to quit job. Moved in with ex partner. Then had to move to Cheshire when that relationship ended.

Now on £23k in a job I love plus I have my own freelance company. I'm happy plus it's cheaper up North.

Visited my old place of work on Monday the catch up with old colleagues and my old boss offered me my old job back. He offered me £52.5k. I was seriously tempted. But house prices are astronomical down there now and I couldn't afford to buy my old house back.

I did ask if I could work remotely from up here; but he wanted me to move back.

I said no to him last night. So I'm putting health and happiness over money. Mixed emotions but feels like I'm doing the right thing! Hopefully! Haha.

Has anyone been in that position?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

Nah.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I haven't but I would do the same as what you have. Money can't buy happiness, you are better off on the lesser salary you are on being happy, than going back to the old job and higher salary and being stressed and unhappy XXX

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I went for an interview about 5 years ago for a job that would have offered about £12k more per annum. I was offered the job but realised it wasn’t really the type of work I really wanted or would be ultimately happy with so turned it down.

As you say money isn’t everything!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Congratulations...you've managed to escape from the velvet cage.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In a nutshell I used to work in South East for a company and was paid £37k. Had a large mortgage and nice but small house. But very stressful job. Sold house to quit job. Moved in with ex partner. Then had to move to Cheshire when that relationship ended.

Now on £23k in a job I love plus I have my own freelance company. I'm happy plus it's cheaper up North.

I did ask if I could work remotely from up here; but he wanted me to move back.

I said no to him last night. So I'm putting health and happiness over money. Mixed emotions but feels like I'm doing the right thing! Hopefully! Haha.

Has anyone been in that position?"

As the old saying goes.... you only live once. Do what makes you happy, don’t live life with regret. I’m sure you have made the right decision for you xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ornyal138Man
over a year ago

bromley kent

Good for you. Less stress and more family time beats cash any day assuming you have enough to live on.

Have friends up North on far less money than me but with small mortgages and houses twice as big but for half the price as mine.

So tempted to move one day soon and get away from the London rat trap

Stay put. Stress kills x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Health & happiness every time , you were brave to have done what you have , I’d say “ stick to your guns “ years ago I did the same but now we both have our own businesses it worked for us

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *..TheCurvyPetrolHead... OP Woman
over a year ago

St Helens

Plus family are up here in Cheshire and there are some hot men!

It did feel nice to be offered the money. But it would be like going back to an ex; all feels good and familiar and then it suddenly dawns on you why you left in the first place! Lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now on £23k in a job I love plus I have my own freelance company. I'm happy plus it's cheaper up North.

I did ask if I could work remotely from up here; but he wanted me to move back.

I said no to him last night. So I'm putting health and happiness over money. Mixed emotions but feels like I'm doing the right thing! Hopefully! Haha.

Has anyone been in that position?"

I would have rented a house instead of thinking to buy a house and saved some money, by taking up that job. Would have seen how the job goes, if it was to stressful I would resign.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

I’m hoping he has a ‘momeht’ And realises he’s missing out not letting you live up north and let’s you do it that way.

It’s swings and roundabouts really isn’t it. Yes you’re earning less but life is cheaper.

I’m glad you did this, after all ‘you can’t take it with you’

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nah."

Good input

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

No, I posted on a ‘millionaire’ thread the other day and commented that imo happiness and some money is better than unhappiness and lots of money.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well done Health & Happiness first everytime

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd take the money and fuck away the stress.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

One money isn't everything and two comparatively if you look at the cost of living down there are you really getting paid more? In my job the wage ranges roughly between just just below 50k-60k. But I would argue that one of my colleagues on say 48k in North Lincolnshire is in real terms far more financially better off that someone on 58k in London. Cost of a nice 3 bed house North Lincolnshire 100k-110k, London God knows but I would guest at least 300k.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Us poor people would love to be on that kind of money

Lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I moved from the South East, with it's associated problems (high cost of living,crowded roads, no one ever talks to their neighbours etc etc) about 30 years ago. I'm pretty sure I could go back down there and earn a lot more money but I wouldn't,,,no way.And not just to keep away from my 'family'.

You're in Northwich, a short drive to Chester,Manchester,Liverpool,North wales,The Lake District,The Peak District and many other jewels that the north has to offer. What is there in the south? Overcrowded trains and some chalk cliffs.

I work from Northwich and the town has it's charms (I see them as I speed through on my way home to somewhere even better).

Personally,I'd go for a comfortable,happy life over the crowds,the high rents,the smog and stress.

Plus,I even get to talk to my neighbours, Or at least,they talk to me when I foolishly make eye contact and can't get away fast enough.

North v South? The north wins it every time for me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ig Chris75Man
over a year ago

Sandbach

Great stuff - happiness comes first.

Us Cheshire folk are quite nice too..!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Should have offered them 1 day a week remotely with a once every 6 weeks visit as a freelance consultant, for a big fat fee!

Apart from that, smart choice x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lanPartridgeMan
over a year ago

nottingham

Now on £23k in a job I love plus I have my own freelance company. I'm happy plus it's cheaper up North.

I did ask if I could work remotely from up here; but he wanted me to move back.

I said no to him last night. So I'm putting health and happiness over money. Mixed emotions but feels like I'm doing the right thing! Hopefully! Haha.

Has anyone been in that position?"

Nope. But in my experience, gut beats head in the wise dept any day of the week.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hips n FursMan
over a year ago

Huddersfield

And it's surposed to be grim up north.

I think you made the right choice OP...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

"Nah.

Good input"

Likewise.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you’ve made the right choice. A few years ago I changed career drastically through necessity and took a huge pay cut. Recently I had the opportunity to go back but the added stress and workload just isn’t worth the extra money. You can’t buy health and happiness

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good for you! I think you've done the right thing.

Money isn't everything and if you're comfortable as you are then don't be tempted to go back to the rat race.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Follow your dreams and your heart...

There will always be enough money to get by, and if you find your happy it's priceless...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rewpieMan
over a year ago

All over

Now on £23k in a job I love plus I have my own freelance company. I'm happy plus it's cheaper up North.

I did ask if I could work remotely from up here; but he wanted me to move back.

I said no to him last night. So I'm putting health and happiness over money. Mixed emotions but feels like I'm doing the right thing! Hopefully! Haha.

Has anyone been in that position?"

I did the same thing. I earn enough money to live comfortably and save a decent amount. Plus im happy where i work. Many of my friends have chased numbers in the past and have ended up extremely depressed.

As long as you can enjoy your life thats all that matters

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im lucky enough to be in an above averagely decent paid job for where we live,thing is the amount of guys at work who will do anything for overtime is embarrassing, im like whats the point of looking at the numbers on your payslip if you dont do anything with it...as soon as the week starts im looking forward to time off again, cant buy memories or family time no matter how much money you earn

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"I moved from the South East, with it's associated problems (high cost of living,crowded roads, no one ever talks to their neighbours etc etc) about 30 years ago. I'm pretty sure I could go back down there and earn a lot more money but I wouldn't,,,no way.And not just to keep away from my 'family'.

I work from Northwich and the town has it's charms (I see them as I speed through on my way home to somewhere even better).

Personally,I'd go for a comfortable,happy life over the crowds,the high rents,the smog and stress.

Plus,I even get to talk to my neighbours, Or at least,they talk to me when I foolishly make eye contact and can't get away fast enough.

North v South? The north wins it every time for me."

I did the same but moved to Cornwall mortgage free, would never go back up to live.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In terms of money, at the end of the month it's disposable income that counts, so a higher salary doesn't count for anything if you've much higher costs.

And waking up in the morning feeling happy to get up and go to work counts for so much more than a few pennies in your bank

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now on £23k in a job I love plus I have my own freelance company. I'm happy plus it's cheaper up North.

I did ask if I could work remotely from up here; but he wanted me to move back.

I said no to him last night. So I'm putting health and happiness over money. Mixed emotions but feels like I'm doing the right thing! Hopefully! Haha.

Has anyone been in that position?"

No but I did walk away from my husband who was on an extremely high wage. Never been happier. Fuck the money. Be happy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nah.

Good input

Likewise.

Thank you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No but I did walk away from my husband who was on an extremely high wage. Never been happier. Fuck the money. Be happy

I did the same! Split with my husband who earned silly money. Move from the south to Scotland, have a small home but I’m mortgage free, free of any ties of him and working part time in a job I enjoy. Money isn’t everything.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Good for you. Less stress and more family time beats cash any day assuming you have enough to live on.

Have friends up North on far less money than me but with small mortgages and houses twice as big but for half the price as mine.

So tempted to move one day soon and get away from the London rat trap

Stay put. Stress kills x"

That's because you live in Dartford! I feel stressed just passing through there!

lol.

Think carefully before moving from South East to up north. I know others who have done it ( including my best friends), they regretted it. Yes cost of living is cheaper but not everything else always works out so well.

Personally, if I moved from the South East, I'd go back to Dorset. South West is gorgeous and the best beaches in the UK.

OP, what area of the south East did you come from? Not every town or village is expensive. I live in town where yes it can be boring but it's safe and reasonably priced. I had a 5 bed house with two reception rooms, clockroom, new kitchen with new built in appliances and bathroom, nice medium sized garden, two new extensions and a driveway big enough for 3 cars... All for £240k.

In any case, long as you're happy that's all that matters.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *j48Man
over a year ago

Wigan

I thought this was a swinging site...

Quite detailed in your text there OP

I'm glad you have a trumpet and enjoy blowing it yourself

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've done the same. I earn less now than I did 12 years ago. And I've moved south so my disposable income has taken a huge hit.

But doin a job with a sense of reward rather than to chase bonuses and targets is way more rewarding.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *..TheCurvyPetrolHead... OP Woman
over a year ago

St Helens

"I thought this was a swinging site...

Quite detailed in your text there OP

I'm glad you have a trumpet and enjoy blowing it yourself "

I am well aware this is a swinging site; but since I have been here I have met some lovely people and have made new friends. People on here are on my level. Didn't mean to blow a trumpet. I'm not like that.

I have seen other posts in the Lounge area where fabbers are helping other fabbers out with life decisions and it's fantastic with people offering support.

Incidentally a guy saw this post and messaged me. We might be having a meet soon; so all is good! Haha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I thought this was a swinging site...

Quite detailed in your text there OP

I'm glad you have a trumpet and enjoy blowing it yourself "

What's your point about it being a swinging site?

In reply to the OP, sounds like you make a good decision.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lpha-and-FoxtrotCouple
over a year ago

Kettering

"Good for you. Less stress and more family time beats cash any day assuming you have enough to live on.

Have friends up North on far less money than me but with small mortgages and houses twice as big but for half the price as mine.

So tempted to move one day soon and get away from the London rat trap

Stay put. Stress kills x

That's because you live in Dartford! I feel stressed just passing through there!

lol.

Personally, if I moved from the South East, I'd go back to Dorset. South West is gorgeous and the best beaches in the UK.

In any case, long as you're happy that's all that matters.

Never seen a house with a room solely for a clock. How very fancy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I thought this was a swinging site...

Quite detailed in your text there OP

I'm glad you have a trumpet and enjoy blowing it yourself "

Nobody forced you to read it did they. What’s up, did your incontinance nurse not turn up this morning or something?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I reckon it’s all relative. Being on double the money in an area where the cost of living is double cancels out the extra money. If you can have a similar lifestyle where you are on half the money then the money is just a number, it’s what you get for that money that counts. You were right to turn it down if you are happy where you are.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *j48Man
over a year ago

Wigan

"I thought this was a swinging site...

Quite detailed in your text there OP

I'm glad you have a trumpet and enjoy blowing it yourself

Nobody forced you to read it did they. What’s up, did your incontinance nurse not turn up this morning or something?"

By the looks of your username yours are permanently full

So I'm not really arsed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I thought this was a swinging site...

Quite detailed in your text there OP

I'm glad you have a trumpet and enjoy blowing it yourself

Nobody forced you to read it did they. What’s up, did your incontinance nurse not turn up this morning or something?

By the looks of your username yours are permanently full

So I'm not really arsed "

My what? It would help if you made some sense

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Choose what's going to make you happiest. That's the most important thing. X x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Offered dream job in London. Straight out of uni. Paying me more than anyone down here. But house prices. Can even afford to stay one night let alone the 5 year contract I got offered

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread