FabSwingers.com forum: Random shit you’ve seen

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Saw a bloke on a penny farthing, wearing a top hat and playing the harmonica, cycle passed where I’m working this morning. Pretty standard.

But what I really want to know is, what random things have you seen?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone sent me a photo of his willy wearing a tiny wooly hat, so I’ve drawn a face on it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A bloke wearing a cow design covered inside, clearly doing the walk of shame up our street.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A Burlesque act featuring Spongebob and Patrick. Bikini Bottom will never be the same again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Awhile back we had a cow walk down the street, the cow managed to walk the loop of our village and took itself back to the farm where it started.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Continuing on the cow theme, when we were in Vegas a car drove down the strip with a cow in the back head out the window.

Ginger

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t think you start enough threads OP

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don’t think you start enough threads OP"

Shall I start another thread about me not starting enough threads ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t think you start enough threads OP

Shall I start another thread about me not starting enough threads ? "

Please do, it’ll make me cum in my pants

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t think you start enough threads OP

Shall I start another thread about me not starting enough threads ?

Please do, it’ll make me cum in my pants "

#metoo

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don’t think you start enough threads OP

Shall I start another thread about me not starting enough threads ?

Please do, it’ll make me cum in my pants "

My threads have that effect.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t think you start enough threads OP

Shall I start another thread about me not starting enough threads ?

Please do, it’ll make me cum in my pants

#metoo"

Don’t try and turn it into a threesome

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi im Tame Impala, you may remember me from such threads as ‘Erections, are they on the rise?’ and ‘Mobility scooters, what a time to be alive!’

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi im Tame Impala, you may remember me from such threads as ‘Erections, are they on the rise?’ and ‘Mobility scooters, what a time to be alive!’"

If you didn’t read this one Troy McClure’s voice, did you even read it?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hi im Tame Impala, you may remember me from such threads as ‘Erections, are they on the rise?’ and ‘Mobility scooters, what a time to be alive!’

If you didn’t read this one Troy McClure’s voice, did you even read it?"

Haha. The mobility scooter thread I regret.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi im Tame Impala, you may remember me from such threads as ‘Erections, are they on the rise?’ and ‘Mobility scooters, what a time to be alive!’

If you didn’t read this one Troy McClure’s voice, did you even read it?

Haha. The mobility scooter thread I regret. "

I miss all of the good threads

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

In answer to the OPs original question, I did see a skateboarding badger high five a duck once.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hi im Tame Impala, you may remember me from such threads as ‘Erections, are they on the rise?’ and ‘Mobility scooters, what a time to be alive!’

If you didn’t read this one Troy McClure’s voice, did you even read it?

Haha. The mobility scooter thread I regret.

I miss all of the good threads"

There were unsavoury opinions that I distance myself from.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi im Tame Impala, you may remember me from such threads as ‘Erections, are they on the rise?’ and ‘Mobility scooters, what a time to be alive!’

If you didn’t read this one Troy McClure’s voice, did you even read it?

Haha. The mobility scooter thread I regret.

I miss all of the good threads

There were unsavoury opinions that I distance myself from. "

Well now you’ve got to tell me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was in the garden when I saw the chickens suddenly run and hide by the side of the pergola. Was a bit perplexed because couldn't hear or see anything then virtually overhead flew a Lancaster bomber, so low I could see into the cockpit, fantastic site.

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By *ervent_fervourMan
over a year ago

Halifax

A calf being transported on the back of a moped in rush hour traffic.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hi im Tame Impala, you may remember me from such threads as ‘Erections, are they on the rise?’ and ‘Mobility scooters, what a time to be alive!’

If you didn’t read this one Troy McClure’s voice, did you even read it?

Haha. The mobility scooter thread I regret.

I miss all of the good threads

There were unsavoury opinions that I distance myself from.

Well now you’ve got to tell me "

Things were said, views exchanged. Obviously I was on the correct side of the argument.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few years ago....I saw a dog become the most talented person in Britain. You may have all seen it as well, the bischon frise cross Chinese crested. To be fair he was a clever dog

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone walking down my village in full pjs and dressing gown

. But suppose that's not really that random now

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By *illy_the_tvTV/TS
over a year ago

hoorn, Netherlands

Someone paid for me and an ex-gf to have a joint dance at a stripclub on one of my birthdays with 2 strippers. One was talking with her vagina and the other blew kisses with her arsehole. This was also my girlfriend at the times first ever lapdancr, I have to say, whilst it wasn't sexy, it was bloody hilarious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Someone paid for me and an ex-gf to have a joint dance at a stripclub on one of my birthdays with 2 strippers. One was talking with her vagina and the other blew kisses with her arsehole. This was also my girlfriend at the times first ever lapdancr, I have to say, whilst it wasn't sexy, it was bloody hilarious"

How does one even blow a kiss with their bumhole?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Was in the garden when I saw the chickens suddenly run and hide by the side of the pergola. Was a bit perplexed because couldn't hear or see anything then virtually overhead flew a Lancaster bomber, so low I could see into the cockpit, fantastic site.

Love to see one.

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By *0tt0nSu3Woman
over a year ago

London

I drove through a rainbow whilst driving to Scotland.

That was weird.

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By *ickawitchCouple
over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

We were driving back from a party very early hours of the morning and saw a cat using a pedestrian crossing.....we didn’t see anyone with the cat who pushed the button but as we drove up the red light came on for us and the green man appeared for the cat. It was one of those looked at each other in disbelief moments

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By *illy_the_tvTV/TS
over a year ago

hoorn, Netherlands

How does one even blow a kiss with their bumhole?

By holding their cheeks open and close and making a kissing sound each time, it was an odd experience

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once saw someone gliding through the sky on what looked like a huge fan like propeller attached to a bench and he/she was just sat there holding on to the parachute strings. I was at a festival at the time so I honestly don't know what I saw was real or I was having a very hallucinogenic trip...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die."

Poetic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Poetic "

You know me.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Saw a guy on a building site turn three somersaults last week.

At the time I was amused.

In retrospect maybe he dug through a live power cable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was walking down the rd the other day heard loads of swearing and threats behind me so i put on my danger face turned around turned out to be a bloke with tourettes behind me tickin away

I really hope its contagious

What a great excuse to be rude in public

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Saw someone looking for £10.000 investment in fanny beer online this morning.

Made with models fanny yeast.

Look it up

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By *0tt0nSu3Woman
over a year ago

London

I saw pidgeons commuting on London Underground.

It was on the Western part of London. Can't remember exactly the exact station. I'll know if I go to the station.(Last time I went there was at least 20 years ago.) That part of the station was out in the open.

I digress.

The pidgeon wandered in through the tube train double doors quite calmly and patiently waited for the doors to close. It commuted for one stop, and when the doors opened, disembarked in a timely manner. It didn't flap away from the doors. It hopped off and trotted off to another part of the platform.

I was shocked. I wish I had some sort of a recording device to capture it.

I never knew pidgeons could be so lazy, and be clever about it.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Saw a fox being harassed by a magpie last week.

Fox was trying to hurry along while looking all nonchalant while the magpie pecked at his tail.

Think the magpie was channelling Ray Winstone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Someone sent me a photo of his willy wearing a tiny wooly hat, so I’ve drawn a face on it. "

I’m actually disappointed I haven’t had this...

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By *ooodoooCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

Watching a fox in the garden with a torch ...and it literally bumped into a badger and both jumped and ran away

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Watching a fox in the garden with a torch ...and it literally bumped into a badger and both jumped and ran away

Thanks for your input

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Watching a fox in the garden with a torch ...and it literally bumped into a badger and both jumped and ran away

Was it holding the torch in its mouth?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Saw a guy on a building site turn three somersaults last week.

At the time I was amused.

In retrospect maybe he dug through a live power cable."

Brilliant thread!!

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By *ooodoooCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A hedgehog walking along the road first thing this morning.... A live hedgehog, not a pancake shaped one

Haven't seen a live one in years!!!!

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By *ooodoooCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

Oops that was meant to be a laughing face ....not ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seen a guy once walking down the road starkers during the day like it was normal,turned out he escaped from the mental illness home and the police were in pursuit.

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By *itvclaireTV/TS
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Hi im Tame Impala, you may remember me from such threads as ‘Erections, are they on the rise?’ and ‘Mobility scooters, what a time to be alive!’

If you didn’t read this one Troy McClure’s voice, did you even read it?"

Yes I did, there is no other way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I drove through a rainbow whilst driving to Scotland.

That was weird."

Sorry but that's actually an impossibility because they don't appear in a particular place in the sky.

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By *0tt0nSu3Woman
over a year ago

London

"I drove through a rainbow whilst driving to Scotland.

That was weird.

Sorry but that's actually an impossibility because they don't appear in a particular place in the sky."

I thought it was an impossibility. But it was weird.... We keep on driving closer and closer to the rainbow. and we were wondering when was it going to fade/go away. It stayed. We drove through it and it became like driving through a golden mist with a slight drizzle with the sun in our eyes. It was so bright.

If anyone has an explanation for this I'm all ears.

It was a truly strange experience for both of us...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once saw a woman riding up the hill on her mobility scooter. It went up on the two back wheels, because of the incline and she fell off, rolling down the hill. A guy was walking up the hill and and as she rolled towards him he jumped over her rolling body and continued walking. When she stopped, there were a few people there to help her up. She wasn't hurt thank goodness. The worst part was, that I couldn't help her. I'd literally peed myself a little from watching all this. I couldn't breathe as I was laughing so much.... It's a few years later and I still laugh, when I think about it.

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By *heffmMan
over a year ago

sheffield

a nun on a mobility scooter

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"I once saw a woman riding up the hill on her mobility scooter. It went up on the two back wheels, because of the incline and she fell off, rolling down the hill. A guy was walking up the hill and and as she rolled towards him he jumped over her rolling body and continued walking. When she stopped, there were a few people there to help her up. She wasn't hurt thank goodness. The worst part was, that I couldn't help her. I'd literally peed myself a little from watching all this. I couldn't breathe as I was laughing so much.... It's a few years later and I still laugh, when I think about it."

Comedy gold right there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a guy in my village that walks his cat around on a lead.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's also another man who rides around on his bicycle with a wasps nest in a box strapped to the back.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Saw someone looking for £10.000 investment in fanny beer online this morning.

Made with models fanny yeast.

Look it up

Can't wait for that Dragon's Den episode

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By *ickawitchCouple
over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've seen the light go out in someone's eyes..

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By *inkyfun2013Couple
over a year ago

lewisham

"I drove through a rainbow whilst driving to Scotland.

That was weird.

Sorry but that's actually an impossibility because they don't appear in a particular place in the sky.

If anyone has an explanation for this I'm all ears.

It was a truly strange experience for both of us..."

We've done exactly this and even managed to video it. I never thought it could happen but it honestly did.

Sadly no crock of gold but one of the stills pics is one of my fave photos.

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By *rozacMan
over a year ago

london

One of the first times with lucy in the sky with diamonds we were wandering around an estate that was very truman show esque, (every street looked identical) trying to decide which way to go next and came across a dead frog pointing down a pathway off the street and down a cycle path. A clear sign if ever to be seen

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By *iss.ddWoman
over a year ago

Leeds + Newcastle

There was a natty second hand shop / factory clearance place in Sunderland (Pyrex shop for locals)

They were selling used mobility scooters and chairs but to market their ruggedness they'd posed them on a rockery in the shop.

You know the way a car dealership models off roaders

It tickled me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t think you start enough threads OP

Shall I start another thread about me not starting enough threads ?

Please do, it’ll make me cum in my pants

#metoo"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Saw a bloke on a penny farthing, wearing a top hat and playing the harmonica, cycle passed where I’m working this morning. Pretty standard.

But what I really want to know is, what random things have you seen? "

A woman in Weymouth exiting a car was covered in actual birds including one on her head while displaying zero f*cks

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

A wild pig type animal merrily trotting in the middle of the road towards my car. It had tusks on its lower jaw.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it really bad that as I was reading this, I had the vision of Commodore 64's version of Donky Kong going through my mind

Mrs x

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By *urity555Man
over a year ago

south west

Stood in the pharmacy que in my local Morrison’s earlier. Saw a middle aged hippy walking out with her shopping with the right side strap of her dress fallen down & her right tit hanging out!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I drove through a rainbow whilst driving to Scotland.

That was weird."

Sounds rather beautiful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i saw a guy only wearing chaps walking down castro st. in san francisco.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A wild pig type animal merrily trotting in the middle of the road towards my car. It had tusks on its lower jaw. "

That’s Cornwall for you.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"i saw a guy only wearing chaps walking down castro st. in san francisco."

Overdressed for Castro ,surely!

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

[Removed by poster at 12/06/18 07:18:13]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A shopping trolley hung on a traffic light. I had to doth my cap to whoever put it there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once saw a man dressed as a pirate walking down the road in the middle of the day - not fancy dress, apparently he always wore it.

And while in the Lake District driving along a quiet country road a wallaby hopped out ahead of us, crossed and carried on into a field

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"A wild pig type animal merrily trotting in the middle of the road towards my car. It had tusks on its lower jaw.

That’s Cornwall for you.

Indeed. Some very bizarre sights here.

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

"I drove through a rainbow whilst driving to Scotland.

That was weird."

That’s just a crock of shit errrr I mean gold

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

"A wild pig type animal merrily trotting in the middle of the road towards my car. It had tusks on its lower jaw. "

I be always wondered where my ex moved to

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A wild pig type animal merrily trotting in the middle of the road towards my car. It had tusks on its lower jaw.

That’s Cornwall for you.

Indeed. Some very bizarre sights here.

Yeah I know, I’ve got family in Penzance.

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

I saw a one legged seagull eating sick off the floor in my work car park.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At a drive through bank in the USA, a machine with Braille buttons on the drivers side.

At same bank inside the building a poster stating.

“If you can’t read this poster, please ask a member of staff who will happily read it for you”

This was written in the smallest font size on the poster.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I regularly have to walk past a person dressed as a Cornish Pastie to get to work

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

When in ireland i turned a corner and a dog jumped on a donkies back. Laid down and smiled

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Watched a female piss onto hubbys face on my last mmf visit

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"A wild pig type animal merrily trotting in the middle of the road towards my car. It had tusks on its lower jaw.

That’s Cornwall for you.

Indeed. Some very bizarre sights here.

Yeah I know, I’ve got family in Penzance. "

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"A wild pig type animal merrily trotting in the middle of the road towards my car. It had tusks on its lower jaw.

I be always wondered where my ex moved to

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"When in ireland i turned a corner and a dog jumped on a donkies back. Laid down and smiled"

Who laid down and smiled, you, the dog or the donkey?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I saw a man in the chatrooms pour a pint of milk in his ass then catch it in a cup and drink it.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"When in ireland i turned a corner and a dog jumped on a donkies back. Laid down and smiled

Who laid down and smiled, you, the dog or the donkey? "
the dog on the donkies back

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"I saw a man in the chatrooms pour a pint of milk in his ass then catch it in a cup and drink it. "

Semi?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I saw a man in the chatrooms pour a pint of milk in his ass then catch it in a cup and drink it.

Semi?"

No he was pretty hard

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By *0tt0nSu3Woman
over a year ago

London

"I saw a man in the chatrooms pour a pint of milk in his ass then catch it in a cup and drink it.

Semi?"

Fully rimmed... No! Fully skimmed...

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"I saw a man in the chatrooms pour a pint of milk in his ass then catch it in a cup and drink it.

Semi?

No he was pretty hard

Ba boom!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once saw two blokes in the same car having a fist fight while sat in traffic on the M62

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Weirdest thing I ever saw was a d*unk slumped outside a pub getting his head shagged senseless by a stray dog

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

I've seen someone who looked old enough to know better flick the end of their skateboard to try and catch it but whacked themselves in the nuts with it instead.

I did laugh out loud at that one.

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By *0tt0nSu3Woman
over a year ago

London

"Weirdest thing I ever saw was a d*unk slumped outside a pub getting his head shagged senseless by a stray dog "

I swear this thread is getting weirder and weirder....

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"I've seen someone who looked old enough to know better flick the end of their skateboard to try and catch it but whacked themselves in the nuts with it instead.

I did laugh out loud at that one."
priceless

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh another time in chat I saw a guy "sounding" with a screwdriver. He was sitting in his hallway with the front door open which was kinda creepy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In a South American jungle we came across an almost good as new ASDA trolley, Nowhere near any civilisation and no £ coin in the slot either.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"In a South American jungle we came across an almost good as new ASDA trolley, Nowhere near any civilisation and no £ coin in the slot either.

That will be the howler monkeys, lawless bastards them.

Well known for their TWOCKING.

They even had David Attenboroughs Trunkie away.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I saw a teenager without a phone in their hand, totally rare sight, I couldn't believe my eyes!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My whole life is one happy random thing

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