FabSwingers.com forum: When you say no thanks your not for me

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And then they ask why?. I think it’s polite enough to reply saying no thanks.

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

Yeah.

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By *itvclaireTV/TS
over a year ago

Birmingham

"And then they ask why?. I think it’s polite enough to reply saying no thanks."

Absolutely OP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You could make a detailed list of why you don't want to give your intimacy to them

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Tell them the truth they won't ask why then.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I've been reported for telling the truth before so now I don't bother!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they ask why I tell them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just delete.

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Me too but some don’t like a polite reason

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just delete."

Player.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You don't need to reply back though. Site rules state deleted messages means no thanks not interested.

If folks can't accept those rules or don't even bother to read them before messaging, then that's on them, not you. Harsh but fair.

Also there's the aspect of junk mail. You didn't ask for those messages so the sender sends at their own risk. No one is owed anything on this site.

It's not your fault when someone refuses to abide by site rules then acts entilted. Just block and move on.

I've been harassed, called all the names under the sun and then threatened by some guys. However If they read profiles before sending messages, they wouldn't of wasted their own time in the first place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely we always reply even if it’s a polite “ sorry not for us “ & simply move on , no drama no fuss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just delete.

Player."

Thank you for stating a very obvious assumption

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just tell them you're riddled

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

Due to abuse and asking the why question, is the reason why I don't bother responding in the first place.

You might think it is rude, but \I can't be arsed for any drama, I have enough in my real life to take any shit from a total stranger!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah it’s annoying when I send a reply saying I’m not meeting at the moment so then they send one saying can’t we just chat and then when I say no thank you.. its the why.... and then the abuse sometimes hahaha x

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By *bsolutebeginnersCouple
over a year ago

Planet Ork

"Yeah it’s annoying when I send a reply saying I’m not meeting at the moment so then they send one saying can’t we just chat and then when I say no thank you.. its the why.... and then the abuse sometimes hahaha x"

We didn’t give you any abuse. It was only a photo for face pic Friday!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And then they ask why?. I think it’s polite enough to reply saying no thanks."

Your message of disinterest should be followed by:

Please note I have already taken the time to notify you of my disinterest out of consideration.

I'd prefer for you to accept it for what it is, rather than make it awkward asking why, as I have no intention of spending any more time on this with further correspondence.

Thanks in advance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And then they ask why?. I think it’s polite enough to reply saying no thanks.

Your message of disinterest should be followed by:

Please note I have already taken the time to notify you of my disinterest out of consideration.

I'd prefer for you to accept it for what it is, rather than make it awkward asking why, as I have no intention of spending any more time on this with further correspondence.

Thanks in advance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my opinion... If you don't reply to someone's mail...they should take it as a hint that you're not interested ! It's not fucking rocket science!

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

In public when I give replies to people that it's very clear provides a 100% closed barrier, social common sense would prevent people from pushing any further.

If people do repeat questions like that in public, I typically repeat the answer, ad finitum, until they stop asking.

On Fab, it's generally appropriate to block, if people persist asking following a polite 'no thanks' imo.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We didn’t give you any abuse. It was only a photo for face pic Friday!

Hahah awww I like your pics!!!!

mwah xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think a thankyou but no thanks is more than satisfactory iv had a few and respect that response, but when they just deleat your message and even block you thats just harsh man totaly harsh

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

Would it be helpful I wonder if the site provided a 'Thank you for your interest, but having reviewed your profile, I don't believe you're what I'm looking for' response option for replying to mail? One that worked much like message filters, so that if the person then tried to send a further message asking why you're not interested (or just pushing their luck), they get the 'WAIT. Think. This user has already said they're not interested, do you really want to send another message?' warning

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would it be helpful I wonder if the site provided a 'Thank you for your interest, but having reviewed your profile, I don't believe you're what I'm looking for' response option for replying to mail? One that worked much like message filters, so that if the person then tried to send a further message asking why you're not interested (or just pushing their luck), they get the 'WAIT. Think. This user has already said they're not interested, do you really want to send another message?' warning

Basically that what I've said ad nauseam on the subject, a "thanks but no thanks" message return button.

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By *otSoNewWalesCoupleCouple
over a year ago

South Wales

"You don't need to reply back though. Site rules state deleted messages means no thanks not interested.

If folks can't accept those rules or don't even bother to read them before messaging, then that's on them, not you. Harsh but fair.

Also there's the aspect of junk mail. You didn't ask for those messages so the sender sends at their own risk. No one is owed anything on this site.

It's not your fault when someone refuses to abide by site rules then acts entilted. Just block and move on.

Spot on on all points.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the abuse is funny... Perhaps that's why i don't get any - they don't want to feed my fun

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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago

Slough Windsor ish

Never had any hassle for saying "thanks but no thanks", on the few occassions we've been asked why Im honest and tell them why and again neverhad a problem as a result.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/06/18 21:09:39]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That was a FTFY moment

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

If they ask why, that just gets deleted, unless I feel sorry for them and have some spare time. I rarely get abuse, my standard copy/paste reply seems to do the trick for most people.

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

That was a FTFY moment

Love it!!!

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"And then they ask why?. I think it’s polite enough to reply saying no thanks."

They should think themselves lucky for the reply..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If they ask why, that just gets deleted, unless I feel sorry for them and have some spare time. I rarely get abuse, my standard copy/paste reply seems to do the trick for most people. "

Same.

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

I agree with you.

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By *airyfatmanMan
over a year ago

by 'ere

"And then they ask why?. I think it’s polite enough to reply saying no thanks.

They should think themselves lucky for the reply..

That’s exactly me. If I get reply (and I never expect one) saying “thanks but no thanks” or words to that effect, I either leave it there or thanks them fo the reply and wish them the best of luck. Not everyone is interested in everyone and people need to to accept that. I never understand the abuse some people give for being turned down.

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By *ack2071Man
over a year ago

bromsgrove

Wait a minute .... Your saying people actually replies to msgs . well I never. Thought it wasnt a option just took it for granted you send a msg and they get ignored...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on the person and what kind of mood I'm in. If they seem genuine and someone I might like but won't meet for whatever reason, then I'll often give an honest answer but not get drawn into further conversation.

If it's someone who clearly hasn't even read my page or sends a crass message with some disgusting photo or other, then I'll ignore any further questions. Except if I'm in a bitchy mood and then I might send a detailed and sarcastic explanation of why I would rather deep fry my own eyeballs than have anything to do with them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don't reply to the vast majority of messages we receive. Why should we? Our profile clearly states what we are looking for so it's not our fault that people don't read it!

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"If they ask why, that just gets deleted, unless I feel sorry for them and have some spare time. I rarely get abuse, my standard copy/paste reply seems to do the trick for most people. "

Same here, once I've said "no thanks" I'm done. I don't enter into a conversation about it. Works for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We don't reply to the vast majority of messages we receive. Why should we? Our profile clearly states what we are looking for so it's not our fault that people don't read it! "

Or read it and think what the hell I'll give it a shot anyway

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