FabSwingers.com forum: Vanilla life

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

How would you approach someone in the vanilla setting?

This is to ask for a coffe with them or just to have a friendly chat.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

Hi, excuse me, I was just wondering if you'd like to grab a coffee with me?

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By *arnayguyMan
over a year ago

Durham Tees

"Hi, excuse me, I was just wondering if you'd like to grab a coffee with me?"

Yes, I would love to. Thanks for asking.

Pretty painless eh.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on who it was and how well I know them. I'm crap at things like that. If it was a friend I'd just ask if they fancied a coffee.

I'd be ready in case they said no. They might not want to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tend to go with ‘do you fancy catching up for a coffee sometime?’ But then I’m a simple soul.

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

“You’re a bit on the chubby side for my liking, so I’ll by you a skinny latte with no sugar when we go for coffee tomorrow.”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would smile at them and say hi.

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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago

Slough Windsor ish

"Im off for a coffee when Im finished here, do you fancy joining me?"

"Jeez Ive worked my ass off in here this afternoon, do you fancy coming for a drink when we are done?"

"I really want to see (insert name of movie here) do you want to join me?"

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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago

Slough Windsor ish

"“You’re a bit on the chubby side for my liking, so I’ll by you a skinny latte with no sugar when we go for coffee tomorrow.”"

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Is this someone random you have seen in the street or someone you have met and spoken to already..

I guess just ask outright ' hey im off for a coffee would you like one. Or perhaps 'fancy a bun?

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By *rmainman10Man
over a year ago

Portsmouth

[Removed by poster at 08/06/18 18:26:25]

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"How would you approach someone in the vanilla setting?

This is to ask for a coffe with them or just to have a friendly chat. "

What would you say, OP?

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Maybe a bit more context would field better advice.

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"How would you approach someone in the vanilla setting?

This is to ask for a coffe with them or just to have a friendly chat. "

Joking apart, fella, it depends on the circumstances and who this is. I have asked people I’ve very recently met, “I don’t suppose you fancy going for lunch / a drink / coffee some time?” I’ve had success with this, but only after there’s been a bit of chat back and fore already, and I’ve got some idea that there’s a chance they’ll say yes. I have never just asked somebody, as the first thing I’ve said to them.

If it’s somebody you already know, just ask if they’re free to meet.

Whatever happens, though, promise you won’t use the words, “just a friendly chat.” There are only a very few ways of sounding more like a serial killer.

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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago

Slough Windsor ish

I dont think anyone asks for a friendly chat.... you just do it. Chat. Be friendly. Dont tell them they are not your type because you only like slim girls.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi, excuse me, I was just wondering if you'd like to grab a coffee with me?"

Bullseye

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By *s_macWoman
over a year ago

Traffic land

"“You’re a bit on the chubby side for my liking, so I’ll by you a skinny latte with no sugar when we go for coffee tomorrow.”"

Ha ha!

I like that, I’d laugh, and then I’d spill my coffee in their lap

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Depends on who it was and how well I know them. I'm crap at things like that. If it was a friend I'd just ask if they fancied a coffee.

I'd be ready in case they said no. They might not want to."
didn't work on you lol xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi, excuse me, I was just wondering if you'd like to grab a coffee with me?"

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Hi, excuse me, I was just wondering if you'd like to grab a coffee with me?

"
yes, this. It’s not beyond most people despite forum comments to the contrary.

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

"I dont think anyone asks for a friendly chat.... you just do it. Chat. Be friendly. Dont tell them they are not your type because you only like slim girls.

Hahha indeed, that wouldnt be prudent at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Depends on who it was and how well I know them. I'm crap at things like that. If it was a friend I'd just ask if they fancied a coffee.

I'd be ready in case they said no. They might not want to.

didn't work on you lol xx"

What didn't work on me?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger "
it’s not difficult even today.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger it’s not difficult even today. "

I thought that might be the case...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger it’s not difficult even today.

I thought that might be the case..."

Still quite doable if your heads not stuck in your phone

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger it’s not difficult even today.

I thought that might be the case...

Still quite doable if your heads not stuck in your phone"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger it’s not difficult even today.

I thought that might be the case...

Still quite doable if your heads not stuck in your phone"

And not over thinking it probably helps too. I hear the same kind of conversations over and over at work all from from people in their late teens and early 20's.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger it’s not difficult even today.

I thought that might be the case...

Still quite doable if your heads not stuck in your phone

And not over thinking it probably helps too. I hear the same kind of conversations over and over at work all from from people in their late teens and early 20's. "

Dating is harder now.

People are way too interested in how they look, or what image they'd have.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger it’s not difficult even today.

I thought that might be the case...

Still quite doable if your heads not stuck in your phone

And not over thinking it probably helps too. I hear the same kind of conversations over and over at work all from from people in their late teens and early 20's.

Dating is harder now.

People are way too interested in how they look, or what image they'd have. "

It was like that when I was at school many moons ago, but I agree it's definitely worse now. Too many photoshopped 'perfect' celeb pics.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger it’s not difficult even today.

I thought that might be the case...

Still quite doable if your heads not stuck in your phone

And not over thinking it probably helps too. I hear the same kind of conversations over and over at work all from from people in their late teens and early 20's.

Dating is harder now.

People are way too interested in how they look, or what image they'd have. "

You’re interested in how you look, OP. The ol’ 5.5 fat workout and muscle building regime?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger it’s not difficult even today.

I thought that might be the case...

Still quite doable if your heads not stuck in your phone

And not over thinking it probably helps too. I hear the same kind of conversations over and over at work all from from people in their late teens and early 20's.

Dating is harder now.

People are way too interested in how they look, or what image they'd have. "

You aren't the first generation to care about how you look, I'd guess social media probably has a damaging effect, but I don't think it's a huge obstacle. I mean I can still pull in the real world on a night out.

Ginger

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Coffee bit boring unless they don't drink alcohol ask them out for drink worse case scenario they say no best case you get sticky fingers as jay from Inbetweeners would say lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“You’re a bit on the chubby side for my liking, so I’ll by you a skinny latte with no sugar when we go for coffee tomorrow.”"

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"Coffee bit boring unless they don't drink alcohol ask them out for drink worse case scenario they say no best case you get sticky fingers as jay from Inbetweeners would say lol "

When I was doing the PoF thing a few years ago, coffee / lunch was always a winner over drinks / dinner. There’s nothing boring about meeting without alcohol if you’ve both got a personality.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger it’s not difficult even today.

I thought that might be the case...

Still quite doable if your heads not stuck in your phone

And not over thinking it probably helps too. I hear the same kind of conversations over and over at work all from from people in their late teens and early 20's.

Dating is harder now.

People are way too interested in how they look, or what image they'd have. "

Can't wait to meet you at a social sometime. Maybe I'll attend the same one as you. I'll keep an eye out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger it’s not difficult even today.

I thought that might be the case...

Still quite doable if your heads not stuck in your phone

And not over thinking it probably helps too. I hear the same kind of conversations over and over at work all from from people in their late teens and early 20's.

Dating is harder now.

People are way too interested in how they look, or what image they'd have.

Can't wait to meet you at a social sometime. Maybe I'll attend the same one as you. I'll keep an eye out"

Why? You were mean to him on the other thread. Are you threatening him?

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Now, despite me always been short, fat and ginger, even I don't recall this dating malarkey being so difficult 15+ years ago.

Ginger "

In all fairness, I don't find it that easy to strike up conversations with strangers, even at my age.

I'm reasonably OK unless it's someone I'm attracted to, then I'm more of a bumbling inane clumsy tongue tied buffoon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am great behind the bar, but put me in a situation outside my comfort zone and I am like a wall flower

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Being on here has done wonders for my confidence, I seriously have no fear of rejection

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I tend to go with ‘do you fancy catching up for a coffee sometime?’ But then I’m a simple soul. "

Next time I pass that second star on the right I'll take you up.om that coffee

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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago

Slough Windsor ish

"Coffee bit boring unless they don't drink alcohol ask them out for drink worse case scenario they say no best case you get sticky fingers as jay from Inbetweeners would say lol

When I was doing the PoF thing a few years ago, coffee / lunch was always a winner over drinks / dinner. There’s nothing boring about meeting without alcohol if you’ve both got a personality."

I think going just for a coffee keeps a limit on the time spent together IF you need it.

Theres nothing wrong with just having one coffee and then going your separate ways if you want. Or of course you can go on to whatever you want if your are both happy.

The trouble with going for a drink in a bar is its quite awkward to escape after just one. Its kind of expected that you will stay for a couple... and if thats alcohol they can reduce your inhibitions and lead you to make questionable choices.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"I tend to go with ‘do you fancy catching up for a coffee sometime?’ But then I’m a simple soul.

Next time I pass that second star on the right I'll take you up.om that coffee

Happy birthday (if it's really your birthday that is)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In all honesty I'm pretty shite at Internet dating or striking up the initial chat, in person I find it natural to start chatting, even with the pretty girls.

Just unfortunate that I don't get much time to meet folk socially so have struggle along online for the most part.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jeez... the basic social skills really pass some by.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Jeez... the basic social skills really pass some by.

GIZZASHAGYABITCH!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Jeez... the basic social skills really pass some by.

GIZZASHAGYABITCH!

Kinda works on an odd level...

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

I'm me so I'd probably say hello and see where it leads.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Coffee or tea?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did this recently. I just said “Hey, here’s my number if you ever fancy a coffee”.

Go for it and good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I did this recently. I just said “Hey, here’s my number if you ever fancy a coffee”.

Go for it and good luck

Did you go for a coffee ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I did this recently. I just said “Hey, here’s my number if you ever fancy a coffee”.

Go for it and good luck

Did you go for a coffee ?"

Obviously

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/06/18 07:48:04]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I saw a hot blonde in the supermarket, I went right up to her and said ‘Has anyone told you, you’re stood right in the way of the Dairy Lea dunkables ?!’

Didn’t get her number.

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