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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. " Say what you want, just don’t be a dick about it | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. " You can say that, he is an imbecile and presumably that guy was black. You were right. | |||
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" Say what you want, just don’t be a dick about it " Can that go in the FAQs for this site? | |||
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"Far too many liberal snowflakes around. If you're describing something as you see it don't worry. If someone wants to dissect your words and misinterpret them for some PC benefit then it's their issue not yours. Your original comments were not designed to be offensive. " That’s my problem. I don’t carry a PC dictionary around. Maybe the next generation will have the same problem when they’re older as the words (milf etc,) are derogatory. But I use obvious descriptives, as I see them and how the person I’m talking to can relate, and on here there’s a fine line describing a persons look, and body shaming a majority maybe. | |||
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"Essentially, using any form of language that conveys a negative impression on a persons physical stature. " I prefer this one.... It will be a shame if our bodies don't make acquaintance rather intimately | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. " People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? " If I’m stood in a group of ten, and I’m the only white dude in that group, would it be odd if he said ‘the guy with the hush puppies on his feet?’ I’d expect the obvious to be pointed out, no? | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? If I’m stood in a group of ten, and I’m the only white dude in that group, would it be odd if he said ‘the guy with the hush puppies on his feet?’ I’d expect the obvious to be pointed out, no? " Have you had the ‘white guy’ label though? | |||
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"Essentially, using any form of language that conveys a negative impression on a persons physical stature. " Just to add to the above and clarify, I find the race card is played far too often in general, not just here. And let's not forget that racism is the equivalent of a spaghetti junction, not a one way street that most seem to think. As for sexual preferences, we're all entitled to our own. If that excludes any group for whatever the reason, so be it. You can't force yourself to be attracted to something you're not. We wouldn't want to be in that situation so why should you be? As for body shaming, it is about negativity first and foremost. We are as we are, whatever the reason(s) for it. I would argue it is enough to say that you're not attracted to someone rather than go into detail that some may find hurtful. There have been times when I've looked at a profile and really wished I could erase the images from my memory. However, I don't then feel the need to convey that feeling to the woman in question as I do believe she has every right to be on here and find what she's looking for. Let it be...as The Beatles suggested. | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? If I’m stood in a group of ten, and I’m the only white dude in that group, would it be odd if he said ‘the guy with the hush puppies on his feet?’ I’d expect the obvious to be pointed out, no? " Depends - What colour are the Hush Puppies? | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? " Guessing he's a man first and foremost that just so happens to be white. If he's on his own and people are talking about him they'll probably just refer in simple language to the man over there. If he happens to be standing amongst others of varying descriptions then I'm guessing they'll refer to maybe his colour if it's unique or some other characteristics that make him stand out from the rest so the person knows who they are discussing. Not exactly offensive is it. | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? If I’m stood in a group of ten, and I’m the only white dude in that group, would it be odd if he said ‘the guy with the hush puppies on his feet?’ I’d expect the obvious to be pointed out, no? Have you had the ‘white guy’ label though? " No. But my post was not about that point, I used it as an example how I sometimes understand how some people (including me) don’t know what to say sometimes. It the afraid of saying something once you’ve been pulled up wrongly, and getting into arguments all the time. If I saw two women..... Me pointing. ...That woman over there. “Which one” The slimmer one. “Are you calling the other fat?” See? It’s just got to the point where I’m not sure what to say. | |||
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"Essentially, using any form of language that conveys a negative impression on a persons physical stature. I prefer this one.... " Yes, I’d agree, short and sweet. Like me ... but in no way saying taller people can’t be sweet. (See what I mean ) | |||
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"Where I’ve seen the word ‘body shaming’ used on the forums is when, for example, someone describes a body part in a way that is critical or not complimentary. It’s usually a generalised discussion or observation, not aimed at a specific person, but I’ve noticed that many people take offence and the poster will be subject to a serious telling off. Mrs" I am an old lefty, so when people bang on about liberal snowflakes and such like I tend to reach for my revolver, as it were. (and by the way, those who go on about snowflakes etc are usually prone to a fit of the vapours if you dare suggest they might have some racist assumptions). Notwithstanding that, it does do my head in when obvious factual statements (for example, on the whole, people in Britain in 2018 find slim people more attractive than overweight people) are denounced as body shaming. | |||
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"....... eg ‘the man in the blue shirt in the third row’, not ‘the black man in the third row’, or the ‘lady with the long red hair’. I guess clothing has become the only PC way of describing someone. Which I don’t particularly agree with, but there you go. Mrs" it seems odd when you see someone going out of the way to ovoid saying something because it’s avoiding the obvious. I think the days when we can all honestly accept our differences are long gone, we are now just trying our best to avoid pointing them out. | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? If I’m stood in a group of ten, and I’m the only white dude in that group, would it be odd if he said ‘the guy with the hush puppies on his feet?’ I’d expect the obvious to be pointed out, no? Have you had the ‘white guy’ label though? " When I was in my early 20s I went to Trinidad with my then boyfriend who was Trinidadian. We not in the tourist areas so I stood out somewhat. I frequently had men say things like ‘hello white girl’ to me. I did not take offence - I took it as friendly banter I enjoyed the attention. But nowadays I think some people would regard it as racist, sexist and derogatory to speak to a young women in that way. Mrs | |||
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"....... eg ‘the man in the blue shirt in the third row’, not ‘the black man in the third row’, or the ‘lady with the long red hair’. I guess clothing has become the only PC way of describing someone. Which I don’t particularly agree with, but there you go. Mrs it seems odd when you see someone going out of the way to ovoid saying something because it’s avoiding the obvious. I think the days when we can all honestly accept our differences are long gone, we are now just trying our best to avoid pointing them out. " I take your point that if you are identifying someone in a group and the person in question is the only white or black person there, it would be obvious to refer to their colour. But bear this in mind. When you are white in the UK, it's the default position and us white people are rarely referred to as. "that white bloke". On the other hand if you are black, references to your colour as an identifying factor will be continuous and I can well understand how it may well get tiresome after a while. | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? If I’m stood in a group of ten, and I’m the only white dude in that group, would it be odd if he said ‘the guy with the hush puppies on his feet?’ I’d expect the obvious to be pointed out, no? Have you had the ‘white guy’ label though? When I was in my early 20s I went to Trinidad with my then boyfriend who was Trinidadian. We not in the tourist areas so I stood out somewhat. I frequently had men say things like ‘hello white girl’ to me. I did not take offence - I took it as friendly banter I enjoyed the attention. But nowadays I think some people would regard it as racist, sexist and derogatory to speak to a young women in that way. Mrs" False equivalence. You were on holiday, so this was a temporary and novel thing. If you lived in a society where your difference from the racial norm was continually pointed out, you might feel differently. | |||
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" Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? If I’m stood in a group of ten, and I’m the only white dude in that group, would it be odd if he said ‘the guy with the hush puppies on his feet?’ I’d expect the obvious to be pointed out, no? Have you had the ‘white guy’ label though? When I was in my early 20s I went to Trinidad with my then boyfriend who was Trinidadian. We not in the tourist areas so I stood out somewhat. I frequently had men say things like ‘hello white girl’ to me. I did not take offence - I took it as friendly banter I enjoyed the attention. But nowadays I think some people would regard it as racist, sexist and derogatory to speak to a young women in that way. Mrs" I have a story that reflects something similar, but I didn’t want this to be about colour of our skin. That’s a whole different tin of beans. I’m doing everything I can to show my children that they are how they are, and that should get them to understand other people are the same. | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? If I’m stood in a group of ten, and I’m the only white dude in that group, would it be odd if he said ‘the guy with the hush puppies on his feet?’ I’d expect the obvious to be pointed out, no? Have you had the ‘white guy’ label though? When I was in my early 20s I went to Trinidad with my then boyfriend who was Trinidadian. We not in the tourist areas so I stood out somewhat. I frequently had men say things like ‘hello white girl’ to me. I did not take offence - I took it as friendly banter I enjoyed the attention. But nowadays I think some people would regard it as racist, sexist and derogatory to speak to a young women in that way. Mrs False equivalence. You were on holiday, so this was a temporary and novel thing. If you lived in a society where your difference from the racial norm was continually pointed out, you might feel differently. " I wasn’t saying it was an equivalent. I think nowadays there would be a lot of women who would be outraged at being spoken to in that when on holiday. | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? If I’m stood in a group of ten, and I’m the only white dude in that group, would it be odd if he said ‘the guy with the hush puppies on his feet?’ I’d expect the obvious to be pointed out, no? Have you had the ‘white guy’ label though? When I was in my early 20s I went to Trinidad with my then boyfriend who was Trinidadian. We not in the tourist areas so I stood out somewhat. I frequently had men say things like ‘hello white girl’ to me. I did not take offence - I took it as friendly banter I enjoyed the attention. But nowadays I think some people would regard it as racist, sexist and derogatory to speak to a young women in that way. Mrs False equivalence. You were on holiday, so this was a temporary and novel thing. If you lived in a society where your difference from the racial norm was continually pointed out, you might feel differently. I wasn’t saying it was an equivalent. I think nowadays there would be a lot of women who would be outraged at being spoken to in that when on holiday. " That's a different point entirely. The discussion here is whether it's rude to use the ethnicity of ethnic minorities as an identifying factor. But on a related point, my daughter and I went to St Lucia last year and visited the capital, we saw only one other white person there, but no one referred to us by our whiteness. Maybe manners have improved generally over the last thirty years. | |||
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"Body shaming is when someone says something like all fatties are lazy and don't exercise.... I'm a fat fucker but I've just done a 20 min walk and I'm on my feet for 8 hours at work. Or real woman have curves.... nope if your born with a vagina and identify as woman your a woman Or only dogs fuck sticks Your comment wasn't racist some people just like to be major cunts in this life. Apparently I'm racist Because I'm usually mainly attracted to Caucasian men " Would that make me racist too then, if I’m usually more attracted to black men? | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. People are labelled! Does anyone describe you as a white man? " No, but I get called a ginger bloke though, regularly. | |||
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"One day people will see past colour to describe someone and just see the man in the white shirt etc" Or accept that ‘human in a white shirt’. Gender is next. I hope we just can accept that we look different, that’s kinda my point. | |||
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"....... eg ‘the man in the blue shirt in the third row’, not ‘the black man in the third row’, or the ‘lady with the long red hair’. I guess clothing has become the only PC way of describing someone. Which I don’t particularly agree with, but there you go. Mrs it seems odd when you see someone going out of the way to ovoid saying something because it’s avoiding the obvious. I think the days when we can all honestly accept our differences are long gone, we are now just trying our best to avoid pointing them out. " David Dimbleby does it on Question Time, when pointing out an audience member. ‘Yes, the man in the blue jumper!’ Heaven forbid he should describe them by what they look like. | |||
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"Do you normally describe people by the colour of their skin, or only when they are a different colour from you? Would you have labelled him a “white guy”? When is someone’s skin colour relevant?" Not normally no. When I refer to my mate Dave, I say Dave....because I know him. But, if I saw discribing a colour of your white skin as a way to go in a conversation because it made you obviously different. (Think the old guess who game) maybe I would. | |||
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"Do you normally describe people by the colour of their skin, or only when they are a different colour from you? Would you have labelled him a “white guy”? When is someone’s skin colour relevant? Not normally no. When I refer to my mate Dave, I say Dave....because I know him. But, if I saw discribing a colour of your white skin as a way to go in a conversation because it made you obviously different. (Think the old guess who game) maybe I would. " Or maybe I’d say about the white shirt, because the other guys are wearing blue. | |||
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"Where I’ve seen the word ‘body shaming’ used on the forums is when, for example, someone describes a body part in a way that is critical or not complimentary. It’s usually a generalised discussion or observation, not aimed at a specific person, but I’ve noticed that many people take offence and the poster will be subject to a serious telling off. Mrs I am an old lefty, so when people bang on about liberal snowflakes and such like I tend to reach for my revolver, as it were. (and by the way, those who go on about snowflakes etc are usually prone to a fit of the vapours if you dare suggest they might have some racist assumptions). Notwithstanding that, it does do my head in when obvious factual statements (for example, on the whole, people in Britain in 2018 find slim people more attractive than overweight people) are denounced as body shaming. " That’s not body shaming, that’s just the truth. It’s not nice to hear, but it’s right. | |||
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"Where I’ve seen the word ‘body shaming’ used on the forums is when, for example, someone describes a body part in a way that is critical or not complimentary. It’s usually a generalised discussion or observation, not aimed at a specific person, but I’ve noticed that many people take offence and the poster will be subject to a serious telling off. Mrs I am an old lefty, so when people bang on about liberal snowflakes and such like I tend to reach for my revolver, as it were. (and by the way, those who go on about snowflakes etc are usually prone to a fit of the vapours if you dare suggest they might have some racist assumptions). Notwithstanding that, it does do my head in when obvious factual statements (for example, on the whole, people in Britain in 2018 find slim people more attractive than overweight people) are denounced as body shaming. That’s not body shaming, that’s just the truth. It’s not nice to hear, but it’s right. " Indeed, but you tend to get attacked if you say that. | |||
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"Someone mocked my ginger nuts and my hob knob, is that body shaming? Thanks in advance X" No...that ‘knobby shaming’. | |||
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"So it’s not ok to describe someone by skin colour or race. I think it’s not ok to describe someone by body size, especially if the person being described is large? Not sure if height is acceptable? Is it ok to describe someone by their hair colour, eye colour, hair style? What about other distinguishing features to help identify someone? This is a good discussion, but makes me realise that I really don’t know what is PC and what isn’t. I guess as per my earlier post, the broadcasting company have taken the view that when on air only clothing can be decribed. Mrs" I havnt a clue what I can and can’t say, but I’m quickly finding out who I won’t say anything to as the years go by. | |||
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"The title of my thread was asking what body shaming was..... Just to clarify. " I guess the thread has gone off track. What you did was not body shaming because you were not saying anything negative about his body. Whether what you said was PC or racist is a different matter and has been added to the discussion. If you want to know what body shaming is, it’s saying something negative about a body or body part. Mrs | |||
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"The title of my thread was asking what body shaming was..... Just to clarify. " But to get to the point you described a scenario which was not body shaming but can equally be discussed as you brought it up. Body shaming I think is someone looking down on another person for how they look...we can't all be perfect but I bet there is no one on here that has not done it at some point even if it is just to say wow look at the size of her/ his nose. | |||
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"From the way I see it, calling someone black or asian isn't raciest, its using a physical trait to describe someone. I don't get upset if someone describes me as mixed race because that's what I am. I do find there is a huge amount of body shaming of Fab, but its only an issue when its said by a man against a woman." Do you think it’s mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. ****im not saying it’s not an issue before someone barks at me, it can be. My question is an observation where men are less likely to be upset/offended/bothered by someone’s bigoted views. | |||
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"So it’s not ok to describe someone by skin colour or race. I think it’s not ok to describe someone by body size, especially if the person being described is large? Not sure if height is acceptable? Is it ok to describe someone by their hair colour, eye colour, hair style? What about other distinguishing features to help identify someone? This is a good discussion, but makes me realise that I really don’t know what is PC and what isn’t. I guess as per my earlier post, the broadcasting company have taken the view that when on air only clothing can be decribed. Mrs" I think you're being slightly disingenuous. We all have a pretty good idea what descriptions are likely to be offensive and what aren't. Describing someone as "that fat woman" or "that bloke with the big nose" are likely to be taken as offensive. Saying the "blonde woman" or the "man with striking green eyes" are not. | |||
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"From the way I see it, calling someone black or asian isn't raciest, its using a physical trait to describe someone. I don't get upset if someone describes me as mixed race because that's what I am. I do find there is a huge amount of body shaming of Fab, but its only an issue when its said by a man against a woman. Do you think it’s mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. . " I do | |||
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"Essentially, using any form of language that conveys a negative impression on a persons physical stature. " Describing someone factually does not fall into this character. I have several black friends. They have no problem being referred to as black. | |||
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"So it’s not ok to describe someone by skin colour or race. I think it’s not ok to describe someone by body size, especially if the person being described is large? Not sure if height is acceptable? Is it ok to describe someone by their hair colour, eye colour, hair style? What about other distinguishing features to help identify someone? This is a good discussion, but makes me realise that I really don’t know what is PC and what isn’t. I guess as per my earlier post, the broadcasting company have taken the view that when on air only clothing can be decribed. Mrs I havnt a clue what I can and can’t say, but I’m quickly finding out who I won’t say anything to as the years go by. " I have mixed race grandchildren I'm supposed to call bi racial allegedly. This was pointed out to me by a white friend, not my daughter and son-in-law. | |||
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"From the way I see it, calling someone black or asian isn't raciest, its using a physical trait to describe someone. I don't get upset if someone describes me as mixed race because that's what I am. I do find there is a huge amount of body shaming of Fab, but its only an issue when its said by a man against a woman. Do you think it’s mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. ****im not saying it’s not an issue before someone barks at me, it can be. My question is an observation where men are less likely to be upset/offended/bothered by someone’s bigoted views. " Yeah I think so. I’ve seen on the forums men saying things like ‘why post a picture of an ugly pussy’ and women call the man out for body shaming. But I’ve noticed there is considerably less outrage if the discussion is about possible pictures of ugly cocks. Maybe men are thicker skinned when it comes to negative descriptions of their bodies. | |||
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"From the way I see it, calling someone black or asian isn't raciest, its using a physical trait to describe someone. I don't get upset if someone describes me as mixed race because that's what I am. I do find there is a huge amount of body shaming of Fab, but its only an issue when its said by a man against a woman. Do you think it’s mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. ****im not saying it’s not an issue before someone barks at me, it can be. My question is an observation where men are less likely to be upset/offended/bothered by someone’s bigoted views. " I wouldn't say its mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. But I would say I think its women who are more effected by it. For example, I've been rejected a ton of times because I'm not tall enough (something I can't help) or because I'm not built enough, or my penis isn't big enough and I just think "meh not there type" and I could be wrong but I think most men are like that. But if you tell a woman you're not attracted to her because shes too large, or her breasts are too small then its more likely to have a bigger impact on her. I don't mean to tar all women with the same brush, I'm talking generally | |||
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"So it’s not ok to describe someone by skin colour or race. I think it’s not ok to describe someone by body size, especially if the person being described is large? Not sure if height is acceptable? Is it ok to describe someone by their hair colour, eye colour, hair style? What about other distinguishing features to help identify someone? This is a good discussion, but makes me realise that I really don’t know what is PC and what isn’t. I guess as per my earlier post, the broadcasting company have taken the view that when on air only clothing can be decribed. Mrs I think you're being slightly disingenuous. We all have a pretty good idea what descriptions are likely to be offensive and what aren't. Describing someone as "that fat woman" or "that bloke with the big nose" are likely to be taken as offensive. Saying the "blonde woman" or the "man with striking green eyes" are not. " I not being disingenuous | |||
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"I bet the person complaining wasn't the black guy!" Correct. And maybe he’s in the same boat as I am, he heard something where someone was offended, so they now think it’s ‘the law where you can get reported for that!’ (Yes, he said that). And just like any hate crime now. We know they exist, but to shout it out at any given is ridiculous. | |||
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"From the way I see it, calling someone black or asian isn't raciest, its using a physical trait to describe someone. I don't get upset if someone describes me as mixed race because that's what I am. I do find there is a huge amount of body shaming of Fab, but its only an issue when its said by a man against a woman. Do you think it’s mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. ****im not saying it’s not an issue before someone barks at me, it can be. My question is an observation where men are less likely to be upset/offended/bothered by someone’s bigoted views. I wouldn't say its mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. But I would say I think its women who are more effected by it. For example, I've been rejected a ton of times because I'm not tall enough (something I can't help) or because I'm not built enough, or my penis isn't big enough and I just think "meh not there type" and I could be wrong but I think most men are like that. But if you tell a woman you're not attracted to her because shes too large, or her breasts are too small then its more likely to have a bigger impact on her. I don't mean to tar all women with the same brush, I'm talking generally " Exactly. Us blokes get rejected for sex all the time because of our physical characteristics, so after a while it ceases to effect us. Women on here will rarely get rejected for sex and lots of blokes will lavish on the compliments in the hope of a fuck. Hence when some bloke does reject a woman because of how she looks, it's unusual and hurtful. | |||
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"From the way I see it, calling someone black or asian isn't raciest, its using a physical trait to describe someone. I don't get upset if someone describes me as mixed race because that's what I am. I do find there is a huge amount of body shaming of Fab, but its only an issue when its said by a man against a woman. Do you think it’s mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. ****im not saying it’s not an issue before someone barks at me, it can be. My question is an observation where men are less likely to be upset/offended/bothered by someone’s bigoted views. I wouldn't say its mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. But I would say I think its women who are more effected by it. For example, I've been rejected a ton of times because I'm not tall enough (something I can't help) or because I'm not built enough, or my penis isn't big enough and I just think "meh not there type" and I could be wrong but I think most men are like that. But if you tell a woman you're not attracted to her because shes too large, or her breasts are too small then its more likely to have a bigger impact on her. I don't mean to tar all women with the same brush, I'm talking generally " I tend to agree. Maybe the years of advice of ‘man up’..... as a whole... we did. | |||
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"I bet the person complaining wasn't the black guy!" Stephen Laurences mum sort of did on Saturday when discussing the Royal wedding and how when talking about the bride they mentioned her colour all the time so I am assuming like everything, some might complain, some might not | |||
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"From the way I see it, calling someone black or asian isn't raciest, its using a physical trait to describe someone. I don't get upset if someone describes me as mixed race because that's what I am. I do find there is a huge amount of body shaming of Fab, but its only an issue when its said by a man against a woman. Do you think it’s mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. . I do " Do you think those women that feel they are body shamed, hear it from men or women? In other words, who bodyshames more? Men or women? | |||
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"It has to be about tone and context surely? Simply using "chubby" or "black" or "ginger" isn't in itself derogatory is it? If it is, then are all women seeking BBC racist? Tone and context. " I was relaying an incident that happened several years ago to my (white) partner. One of the executives came into the group office, my team were all black, and said "I've been working like a nigger today." His argument was tone, context and environment meant no malice was intended so I overreacted. The head of department said the same thing. Trust me...tone and context mean jack...made me look at my partner in a different light too...don't think I'd trust him to have my back. | |||
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" For example, I've been rejected a ton of times because I'm not tall enough (something I can't help) or because I'm not built enough, or my penis isn't big enough and I just think "meh not there type" and I could be wrong but I think most men are like that. But if you tell a woman you're not attracted to her because shes too large, or her breasts are too small then its more likely to have a bigger impact on her. I don't mean to tar all women with the same brush, I'm talking generally " I think it is just how we are wired up, women and men think differently. I also think we talk different, were as Mr ruggers might tell his mate he is turning into a fat git and it wouldn't be a problem , if I told my friend the same way she would be upset. | |||
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"From the way I see it, calling someone black or asian isn't raciest, its using a physical trait to describe someone. I don't get upset if someone describes me as mixed race because that's what I am. I do find there is a huge amount of body shaming of Fab, but its only an issue when its said by a man against a woman. Do you think it’s mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. . I do Do you think those women that feel they are body shamed, hear it from men or women? In other words, who bodyshames more? Men or women? " I think women are bitchier than men yes and have seen some real nasty comments on here before now about women from women. | |||
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"From the way I see it, calling someone black or asian isn't raciest, its using a physical trait to describe someone. I don't get upset if someone describes me as mixed race because that's what I am. I do find there is a huge amount of body shaming of Fab, but its only an issue when its said by a man against a woman. Do you think it’s mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. . I do Do you think those women that feel they are body shamed, hear it from men or women? In other words, who bodyshames more? Men or women? " I think both body shame but men in a not as an aware way that they are? I can't really clarify that right now. Women do it quite cruelly, especially on the forum. | |||
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"I bet the person complaining wasn't the black guy! Stephen Laurences mum sort of did on Saturday when discussing the Royal wedding and how when talking about the bride they mentioned her colour all the time so I am assuming like everything, some might complain, some might not " I interpreted that as she was disappointed Meghan's colour was always an issue. | |||
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"I bet the person complaining wasn't the black guy! Stephen Laurences mum sort of did on Saturday when discussing the Royal wedding and how when talking about the bride they mentioned her colour all the time so I am assuming like everything, some might complain, some might not I interpreted that as she was disappointed Meghan's colour was always an issue." Exactly how I took it. I am guessing she may have thought the same about the OP, that the colour of the mans skin shouldn't be an issue or need commenting on | |||
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"It has to be about tone and context surely? Simply using "chubby" or "black" or "ginger" isn't in itself derogatory is it? If it is, then are all women seeking BBC racist? Tone and context. I was relaying an incident that happened several years ago to my (white) partner. One of the executives came into the group office, my team were all black, and said "I've been working like a nigger today." His argument was tone, context and environment meant no malice was intended so I overreacted. The head of department said the same thing. Trust me...tone and context mean jack...made me look at my partner in a different light too...don't think I'd trust him to have my back." The 'N' word is a difficult one. It always causes debate yet is used daily by different races as a term of endearment? Although to be honest I think that the statement was derogatory one. Irrespective of the environment. | |||
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"I bet the person complaining wasn't the black guy! Stephen Laurences mum sort of did on Saturday when discussing the Royal wedding and how when talking about the bride they mentioned her colour all the time so I am assuming like everything, some might complain, some might not I interpreted that as she was disappointed Meghan's colour was always an issue. Exactly how I took it. I am guessing she may have thought the same about the OP, that the colour of the mans skin shouldn't be an issue or need commenting on" I’m disappointed that the history of the world has got me in a position where if I use a blatent obvious observation of the differences between one person to another is something that upsets someone else. But here I am. | |||
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"Where I’ve seen the word ‘body shaming’ used on the forums is when, for example, someone describes a body part in a way that is critical or not complimentary. It’s usually a generalised discussion or observation, not aimed at a specific person, but I’ve noticed that many people take offence and the poster will be subject to a serious telling off. Mrs I am an old lefty, so when people bang on about liberal snowflakes and such like I tend to reach for my revolver, as it were. (and by the way, those who go on about snowflakes etc are usually prone to a fit of the vapours if you dare suggest they might have some racist assumptions). Notwithstanding that, it does do my head in when obvious factual statements (for example, on the whole, people in Britain in 2018 find slim people more attractive than overweight people) are denounced as body shaming. That’s not body shaming, that’s just the truth. It’s not nice to hear, but it’s right. Indeed, but you tend to get attacked if you say that. " For me personally, it’s when posters say that every single man prefers slim women. That’s just not the case. | |||
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"From the way I see it, calling someone black or asian isn't raciest, its using a physical trait to describe someone. I don't get upset if someone describes me as mixed race because that's what I am. I do find there is a huge amount of body shaming of Fab, but its only an issue when its said by a man against a woman. Do you think it’s mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. . I do Do you think those women that feel they are body shamed, hear it from men or women? In other words, who bodyshames more? Men or women? I think women are bitchier than men yes and have seen some real nasty comments on here before now about women from women. " There are a few women posters who shame other women very subtly. | |||
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"I bet the person complaining wasn't the black guy! Stephen Laurences mum sort of did on Saturday when discussing the Royal wedding and how when talking about the bride they mentioned her colour all the time so I am assuming like everything, some might complain, some might not I interpreted that as she was disappointed Meghan's colour was always an issue. Exactly how I took it. I am guessing she may have thought the same about the OP, that the colour of the mans skin shouldn't be an issue or need commenting on I’m disappointed that the history of the world has got me in a position where if I use a blatent obvious observation of the differences between one person to another is something that upsets someone else. But here I am. " To be honest, if I was describing a group of people, I’d probably try to use a description that doesn’t involve skin colour. It’s just forward thinking. Like I’ll say “they” when asking about someone’s partner. It’s actually not that difficult to be politically correct. | |||
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" I’m disappointed that the history of the world has got me in a position where if I use a blatent obvious observation of the differences between one person to another is something that upsets someone else. But here I am. To be honest, if I was describing a group of people, I’d probably try to use a description that doesn’t involve skin colour. It’s just forward thinking. Like I’ll say “they” when asking about someone’s partner. It’s actually not that difficult to be politically correct. " I was going to give a violin but this more eloquently describes my feelings on the matter. | |||
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"From the way I see it, calling someone black or asian isn't raciest, its using a physical trait to describe someone. I don't get upset if someone describes me as mixed race because that's what I am. I do find there is a huge amount of body shaming of Fab, but its only an issue when its said by a man against a woman. Do you think it’s mostly women that think body shaming is an issue. . I do Do you think those women that feel they are body shamed, hear it from men or women? In other words, who bodyshames more? Men or women? I think women are bitchier than men yes and have seen some real nasty comments on here before now about women from women. " There is a lot of body shaming that goes on in womens profiles. It's incredibly off putting and I use it as a filter. I can't comment on mens as I don't often look at mens profiles | |||
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"I bet the person complaining wasn't the black guy! Stephen Laurences mum sort of did on Saturday when discussing the Royal wedding and how when talking about the bride they mentioned her colour all the time so I am assuming like everything, some might complain, some might not I interpreted that as she was disappointed Meghan's colour was always an issue. Exactly how I took it. I am guessing she may have thought the same about the OP, that the colour of the mans skin shouldn't be an issue or need commenting on I’m disappointed that the history of the world has got me in a position where if I use a blatent obvious observation of the differences between one person to another is something that upsets someone else. But here I am. ." Don't take my comments personally, I am sure all of us have said what you did at some point without trying to purposely offend anyone. I just think it will be a better world when no one sees colour to describe someone and just see a person over there with the blue shoes etc | |||
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" I’m disappointed that the history of the world has got me in a position where if I use a blatent obvious observation of the differences between one person to another is something that upsets someone else. But here I am. To be honest, if I was describing a group of people, I’d probably try to use a description that doesn’t involve skin colour. It’s just forward thinking. Like I’ll say “they” when asking about someone’s partner. It’s actually not that difficult to be politically correct. I was going to give a violin but this more eloquently describes my feelings on the matter." Can I take a violin emoji personally? | |||
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"I I’m disappointed that the history of the world has got me in a position where if I use a blatent obvious observation of the differences between one person to another is something that upsets someone else. But here I am. . Don't take my comments personally, I am sure all of us have said what you did at some point without trying to purposely offend anyone. I just think it will be a better world when no one sees colour to describe someone and just see a person over there with the blue shoes etc " I will always see colour. I’ve got eyes ...., and just like a highlighter pen in yellow, I will see the most prominentt difference in my scope. A blue shirt that stands out, his bright purple hair, or a pink bow she is wearing. Maybe even that the larger lady in the group stands out. But are you saying you’d prefer others around to be politically correct, rather than the hope that one day we are not using those facts of our differences (eg, short/different colour skin/larger bodies) as something to accept? It is what it is isn’t it? Everyone is different and should be accepted that way? Or should we ignore it, and pretend we’re all the same? I agree we are human, but that’s where our similarities end. | |||
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" I’m disappointed that the history of the world has got me in a position where if I use a blatent obvious observation of the differences between one person to another is something that upsets someone else. But here I am. To be honest, if I was describing a group of people, I’d probably try to use a description that doesn’t involve skin colour. It’s just forward thinking. Like I’ll say “they” when asking about someone’s partner. It’s actually not that difficult to be politically correct. I was going to give a violin but this more eloquently describes my feelings on the matter. Can I take a violin emoji personally? " The thing is, you’re asking for advice about body shaming. There are people who are giving you advice, who, in this case can tell you first hand how they think you should deal with the particular situation you were in. Do you think you’ll actually change how you approach the situation after reading the replies? | |||
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"I bet the person complaining wasn't the black guy! Stephen Laurences mum sort of did on Saturday when discussing the Royal wedding and how when talking about the bride they mentioned her colour all the time so I am assuming like everything, some might complain, some might not I interpreted that as she was disappointed Meghan's colour was always an issue. Exactly how I took it. I am guessing she may have thought the same about the OP, that the colour of the mans skin shouldn't be an issue or need commenting on I’m disappointed that the history of the world has got me in a position where if I use a blatent obvious observation of the differences between one person to another is something that upsets someone else. But here I am. . Don't take my comments personally, I am sure all of us have said what you did at some point without trying to purposely offend anyone. I just think it will be a better world when no one sees colour to describe someone and just see a person over there with the blue shoes etc " What about describing other physical attributes aside from skin colour (as long as described politely?) | |||
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" But are you saying you’d prefer others around to be politically correct " No. What I am saying is...one day it would be nice to accept that we are all humans and are not defined by how we look/ what colour we are. I don't think that is being PC , that is accepting that we are indeed all different and I don't need to highlight why | |||
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"I I’m disappointed that the history of the world has got me in a position where if I use a blatent obvious observation of the differences between one person to another is something that upsets someone else. But here I am. . Don't take my comments personally, I am sure all of us have said what you did at some point without trying to purposely offend anyone. I just think it will be a better world when no one sees colour to describe someone and just see a person over there with the blue shoes etc I will always see colour. I’ve got eyes ...., and just like a highlighter pen in yellow, I will see the most prominentt difference in my scope. A blue shirt that stands out, his bright purple hair, or a pink bow she is wearing. Maybe even that the larger lady in the group stands out. But are you saying you’d prefer others around to be politically correct, rather than the hope that one day we are not using those facts of our differences (eg, short/different colour skin/larger bodies) as something to accept? It is what it is isn’t it? Everyone is different and should be accepted that way? Or should we ignore it, and pretend we’re all the same? I agree we are human, but that’s where our similarities end. " You have a choice. It's been explained to you why some people will find it offensive. You can disregard that because you think people are wrong and run the risk of offending people or you can take on board what has been said and try not to offend. It's up to you. | |||
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" What about describing other physical attributes aside from skin colour (as long as described politely?) " Probably not for me, mine would probably be what they were wearing . I am not obviously saying that is the right way but it is how I would do it | |||
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"If Sir was the only black guy in a room of white guys and you identified him by something he was wearing and not his colour, I’d think that was very odd. In fact I’d think you were uncomfortable about race issues for one reason or other. " I am never sure twisting things like this ever helps a good discussion | |||
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"If Sir was the only black guy in a room of white guys and you identified him by something he was wearing and not his colour, I’d think that was very odd. In fact I’d think you were uncomfortable about race issues for one reason or other. " Well there we have the other side of the argument. Maybe some people would prefer it if what they consider to be their most obvious difference is acknowledged as oppose to avoided. Goes to show you can’t please everybody. | |||
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"If Sir was the only black guy in a room of white guys and you identified him by something he was wearing and not his colour, I’d think that was very odd. In fact I’d think you were uncomfortable about race issues for one reason or other. " I don't think anyone is objecting to that situation, ditto where you were identifying one white bloke in a room of black blokes. It's where someone's ethnicity becomes a defining characteristic for a black person, in a way it isn't for a white person. | |||
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"If Sir was the only black guy in a room of white guys and you identified him by something he was wearing and not his colour, I’d think that was very odd. In fact I’d think you were uncomfortable about race issues for one reason or other. " Unless of course he was wearing some ridiculously overt coloured clothing that drew peoples attention to that rather than his skin colour. But mostly the most obvious thing is he’s black and that’s just a fact. Both of us having worked as minority in our jobs, Sir because of colour, me because of sex. If someone identified me as that person wearing blah blah blah, when I’m the only woman in a room would be odd. But then people don’t dance around those facts like they do with race issues. There are different coloured people in the world, get over it. I do, as often as I can | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. Say what you want, just don’t be a dick about it " The problem with that is...there are dices who just think others are being a dick about some thing and so will complain. Bit like the house next door getting the fence painted green and neighbour doesn't like the colour... they have little else to do so they complain. | |||
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"If Sir was the only black guy in a room of white guys and you identified him by something he was wearing and not his colour, I’d think that was very odd. In fact I’d think you were uncomfortable about race issues for one reason or other. I am never sure twisting things like this ever helps a good discussion" Giving my opinion thank you. Not twisting things. | |||
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" I’m disappointed that the history of the world has got me in a position where if I use a blatent obvious observation of the differences between one person to another is something that upsets someone else. But here I am. To be honest, if I was describing a group of people, I’d probably try to use a description that doesn’t involve skin colour. It’s just forward thinking. Like I’ll say “they” when asking about someone’s partner. It’s actually not that difficult to be politically correct. I was going to give a violin but this more eloquently describes my feelings on the matter. Can I take a violin emoji personally? The thing is, you’re asking for advice about body shaming. There are people who are giving you advice, who, in this case can tell you first hand how they think you should deal with the particular situation you were in. Do you think you’ll actually change how you approach the situation after reading the replies? " Thing is, I was asking about body shaming more than anything else. Fat/wrinkly/skinny/saggy etc. Will I aproach describing someone’s looks differently? Maybe a little more careful that I don’t offend those that are, in my opinion, overly sensitive. And I mean that sincerely, I’m not here on this spinning globe to hurt people, I wish we all could have a big hug and live in harmony, ( some will misread that and take that as a sexual advance probably. (see what I mean) ) My question has been answered, we all interpret most things individually and we all deal with things said to us differently too. I’ve never said anything in malice (maybe in school, but we were all dicks probably) and I think I’ll stay safe in the future as long as I keep my current way of living. | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. Say what you want, just don’t be a dick about it " | |||
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"If you are pointing out difference to make a point that you are better than them / they are worse than you then that's not deemed acceptable. You've got liberal snowflakes like my good self who think it's good not to assume they are better than people based on things that can't be controlled like size, ability, race etc and you have the (more usually but by no means exclusively) right wing types who tend to fall apart when they are told it's not nice to be unpleasant about people. So, say, commenting that someone is black or slimmer isn't in itself bad but if it was done to show you thought they were not as good as you because of those deferences, that'd be bad." So here’s a pretty common scenario . We put up a meet and get a few responses . I’m at home my wife is at work . I check through the messages and pics and automatically get an idea of who’s who . When my wife gets home we discuss who we will message back . I say a name , she says which one was that , I say the older guy , or the slim guy , the fat guy , or the young guy with a beard , or the bald guy , or the black guy , the asian guy , the guy with a big cock etc.... and so it goes on . I honestly couldn’t say what they were wearing in the pics they send . What I remember is detailed above . It works and isn’t meant in a derogatory way . Same goes after a meet , especially if it’s a random dogging meet . There may be up to ten guys attending and half a dozen or more from fab . Some message afterwards and say how much they enjoyed it , and give us a veri . If they don’t have pics they have to tell us who they were by describing themselves . I was the black guy , the ginger guy , the bald guy , the tall guy with a shaved head , the guy in the blue shirt wouldn’t mean anything unless it was fluorescent . So there’s nothing wrong with describing someone as what their skin colour , shape , height or determining features are really is there ? | |||
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"One day people will see past colour to describe someone and just see the man in the white shirt etc" Wouldn't work with IC codes! IC male with a pink hoody and some adidas bottoms. IC1 male wearing a 2002 Swansea away top stealing cans from Asda! | |||
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"If you are pointing out difference to make a point that you are better than them / they are worse than you then that's not deemed acceptable. You've got liberal snowflakes like my good self who think it's good not to assume they are better than people based on things that can't be controlled like size, ability, race etc and you have the (more usually but by no means exclusively) right wing types who tend to fall apart when they are told it's not nice to be unpleasant about people. So, say, commenting that someone is black or slimmer isn't in itself bad but if it was done to show you thought they were not as good as you because of those deferences, that'd be bad. So here’s a pretty common scenario . We put up a meet and get a few responses . I’m at home my wife is at work . I check through the messages and pics and automatically get an idea of who’s who . When my wife gets home we discuss who we will message back . I say a name , she says which one was that , I say the older guy , or the slim guy , the fat guy , or the young guy with a beard , or the bald guy , or the black guy , the asian guy , the guy with a big cock etc.... and so it goes on . I honestly couldn’t say what they were wearing in the pics they send . What I remember is detailed above . It works and isn’t meant in a derogatory way . Same goes after a meet , especially if it’s a random dogging meet . There may be up to ten guys attending and half a dozen or more from fab . Some message afterwards and say how much they enjoyed it , and give us a veri . If they don’t have pics they have to tell us who they were by describing themselves . I was the black guy , the ginger guy , the bald guy , the tall guy with a shaved head , the guy in the blue shirt wouldn’t mean anything unless it was fluorescent . So there’s nothing wrong with describing someone as what their skin colour , shape , height or determining features are really is there ? " I can't tell if you are agreeing or disagreeing with me. | |||
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"If you are pointing out difference to make a point that you are better than them / they are worse than you then that's not deemed acceptable. You've got liberal snowflakes like my good self who think it's good not to assume they are better than people based on things that can't be controlled like size, ability, race etc and you have the (more usually but by no means exclusively) right wing types who tend to fall apart when they are told it's not nice to be unpleasant about people. So, say, commenting that someone is black or slimmer isn't in itself bad but if it was done to show you thought they were not as good as you because of those deferences, that'd be bad. So here’s a pretty common scenario . We put up a meet and get a few responses . I’m at home my wife is at work . I check through the messages and pics and automatically get an idea of who’s who . When my wife gets home we discuss who we will message back . I say a name , she says which one was that , I say the older guy , or the slim guy , the fat guy , or the young guy with a beard , or the bald guy , or the black guy , the asian guy , the guy with a big cock etc.... and so it goes on . I honestly couldn’t say what they were wearing in the pics they send . What I remember is detailed above . It works and isn’t meant in a derogatory way . Same goes after a meet , especially if it’s a random dogging meet . There may be up to ten guys attending and half a dozen or more from fab . Some message afterwards and say how much they enjoyed it , and give us a veri . If they don’t have pics they have to tell us who they were by describing themselves . I was the black guy , the ginger guy , the bald guy , the tall guy with a shaved head , the guy in the blue shirt wouldn’t mean anything unless it was fluorescent . So there’s nothing wrong with describing someone as what their skin colour , shape , height or determining features are really is there ? I can't tell if you are agreeing or disagreeing with me. " Well the descriptive terms I’ve used certainly aren’t used t make me or anyone else appear better than anyone else . So I’m agreeing I think | |||
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"If you are pointing out difference to make a point that you are better than them / they are worse than you then that's not deemed acceptable. You've got liberal snowflakes like my good self who think it's good not to assume they are better than people based on things that can't be controlled like size, ability, race etc and you have the (more usually but by no means exclusively) right wing types who tend to fall apart when they are told it's not nice to be unpleasant about people. So, say, commenting that someone is black or slimmer isn't in itself bad but if it was done to show you thought they were not as good as you because of those deferences, that'd be bad. So here’s a pretty common scenario . We put up a meet and get a few responses . I’m at home my wife is at work . I check through the messages and pics and automatically get an idea of who’s who . When my wife gets home we discuss who we will message back . I say a name , she says which one was that , I say the older guy , or the slim guy , the fat guy , or the young guy with a beard , or the bald guy , or the black guy , the asian guy , the guy with a big cock etc.... and so it goes on . I honestly couldn’t say what they were wearing in the pics they send . What I remember is detailed above . It works and isn’t meant in a derogatory way . Same goes after a meet , especially if it’s a random dogging meet . There may be up to ten guys attending and half a dozen or more from fab . Some message afterwards and say how much they enjoyed it , and give us a veri . If they don’t have pics they have to tell us who they were by describing themselves . I was the black guy , the ginger guy , the bald guy , the tall guy with a shaved head , the guy in the blue shirt wouldn’t mean anything unless it was fluorescent . So there’s nothing wrong with describing someone as what their skin colour , shape , height or determining features are really is there ? I can't tell if you are agreeing or disagreeing with me. Well the descriptive terms I’ve used certainly aren’t used t make me or anyone else appear better than anyone else . So I’m agreeing I think " Just remember I'm stupid. | |||
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"If I'm not being described as that fit bird with the big tits then I'm offend. " Hello fit bird with big tits | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. " . Body shaming is PC brigade way of saying you can't have option yet its also away of making someone feel uncomfortable with there body. | |||
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" If I’m stood in a group of ten, and I’m the only white dude in that group, would it be odd if he said ‘the guy with the hush puppies on his feet?’ I’d expect the obvious to be pointed out, no? " Probably odder that you were wearing hush puppies..... | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. . Body shaming is PC brigade way of saying you can't have option yet its also away of making someone feel uncomfortable with there body." Just don’t make people feel uncomfortable about their body and then the PC Brigade won’t tell you off. | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. . Body shaming is PC brigade way of saying you can't have option yet its also away of making someone feel uncomfortable with there body. Just don’t make people feel uncomfortable about their body and then the PC Brigade won’t tell you off. " It's sad how many people feel that expecting them to be kind and considerate is a huge imposition | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. . Body shaming is PC brigade way of saying you can't have option yet its also away of making someone feel uncomfortable with there body. Just don’t make people feel uncomfortable about their body and then the PC Brigade won’t tell you off. It's sad how many people feel that expecting them to be kind and considerate is a huge imposition " This. | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. . Body shaming is PC brigade way of saying you can't have option yet its also away of making someone feel uncomfortable with there body. Just don’t make people feel uncomfortable about their body and then the PC Brigade won’t tell you off. It's sad how many people feel that expecting them to be kind and considerate is a huge imposition " Yep! | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. . Body shaming is PC brigade way of saying you can't have option yet its also away of making someone feel uncomfortable with there body. Just don’t make people feel uncomfortable about their body and then the PC Brigade won’t tell you off. It's sad how many people feel that expecting them to be kind and considerate is a huge imposition " It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion | |||
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" Say what you want, just don’t be a dick about it Can that go in the FAQs for this site? " I second this. | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion" Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. . Body shaming is PC brigade way of saying you can't have option yet its also away of making someone feel uncomfortable with there body. Just don’t make people feel uncomfortable about their body and then the PC Brigade won’t tell you off. It's sad how many people feel that expecting them to be kind and considerate is a huge imposition It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion" Can you be more plane? Sounds like you are trying to make a point but it isn't clear quite what it is. | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. " Seems like you struggle to have compassion for people with different opinions to you | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. . Body shaming is PC brigade way of saying you can't have option yet its also away of making someone feel uncomfortable with there body. Just don’t make people feel uncomfortable about their body and then the PC Brigade won’t tell you off. It's sad how many people feel that expecting them to be kind and considerate is a huge imposition It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion" | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. Seems like you struggle to have compassion for people with different opinions to you " When they're outright ludicrous, self-involved opinions, I do struggle. I'm only human. | |||
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"I had an argument, an absolute stand up argument where we were throwing bombs at each other (I think I called him an imbecile) with a dude because when I referred to ‘that guy over there, the black guy. I got told I can’t say that, I’m a racist. I start with that story because I see in here as soon as someone refers to a persons body shape or size or even close to how physical features are on a person (even a persons preference to what type of body they fancy) they get called out for ‘body shaming’. Can someone clarify what I can and can’t say on here, before I start fighting. . Body shaming is PC brigade way of saying you can't have option yet its also away of making someone feel uncomfortable with there body. Just don’t make people feel uncomfortable about their body and then the PC Brigade won’t tell you off. It's sad how many people feel that expecting them to be kind and considerate is a huge imposition " Having followed this thread from the beginning, although contributors have different views as to what is appropriate behaviour, I don’t think anybody feels that being expected to be kind and considerate is an imposition. Mrs | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. Seems like you struggle to have compassion for people with different opinions to you When they're outright ludicrous, self-involved opinions, I do struggle. I'm only human. " Sounds like you really believe that telling the truth, as you see it, is actually more important than compassion | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. Seems like you struggle to have compassion for people with different opinions to you When they're outright ludicrous, self-involved opinions, I do struggle. I'm only human. " A lot of opinions have been expressed in this thread. Which are the ones that you are struggling with if you don’t mind me asking ? Mrs | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. Seems like you struggle to have compassion for people with different opinions to you When they're outright ludicrous, self-involved opinions, I do struggle. I'm only human. Sounds like you really believe that telling the truth, as you see it, is actually more important than compassion" Oo, such a cunning trap you think you're laying! But then, it's almost like context matters, and adults handle different situations differently. So if I see an overweight person, I have no need to upset them by going over and pointing out that they are overweight, even if it is true. But if someone responds to me on a message forum, positing that people are going to jail for not being nice to each other, I feel no constraints in telling them their opinion is a fantasy. | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. Seems like you struggle to have compassion for people with different opinions to you When they're outright ludicrous, self-involved opinions, I do struggle. I'm only human. A lot of opinions have been expressed in this thread. Which are the ones that you are struggling with if you don’t mind me asking ? Mrs" That people are being deprived of their liberty and autonomy because others expect them to be considerate. | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. Seems like you struggle to have compassion for people with different opinions to you When they're outright ludicrous, self-involved opinions, I do struggle. I'm only human. Sounds like you really believe that telling the truth, as you see it, is actually more important than compassion Oo, such a cunning trap you think you're laying! But then, it's almost like context matters, and adults handle different situations differently. So if I see an overweight person, I have no need to upset them by going over and pointing out that they are overweight, even if it is true. But if someone responds to me on a message forum, positing that people are going to jail for not being nice to each other, I feel no constraints in telling them their opinion is a fantasy." I think you’ll find everybody on this thread will agree with you that its wrong to upset someone by telling them their overweight | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. Seems like you struggle to have compassion for people with different opinions to you When they're outright ludicrous, self-involved opinions, I do struggle. I'm only human. Sounds like you really believe that telling the truth, as you see it, is actually more important than compassion Oo, such a cunning trap you think you're laying! But then, it's almost like context matters, and adults handle different situations differently. So if I see an overweight person, I have no need to upset them by going over and pointing out that they are overweight, even if it is true. But if someone responds to me on a message forum, positing that people are going to jail for not being nice to each other, I feel no constraints in telling them their opinion is a fantasy." It's also fantasy that there's a significant population who would cross the road to go shout abuse at an obese person. What people on your end of the political spectrum do is shove pictures of unhealthy bodies in front of us and scream "body shaming" if we point out biological facts about what is and isn't healthy. | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. Seems like you struggle to have compassion for people with different opinions to you When they're outright ludicrous, self-involved opinions, I do struggle. I'm only human. A lot of opinions have been expressed in this thread. Which are the ones that you are struggling with if you don’t mind me asking ? Mrs That people are being deprived of their liberty and autonomy because others expect them to be considerate. " Only one contributor mentioned a deprivation of liberty and autonomy. I think they were talking about freedom of speech, although it wasn’t clear. I don’t think it’s their view that one should not be kind and considerate to others. | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. Seems like you struggle to have compassion for people with different opinions to you When they're outright ludicrous, self-involved opinions, I do struggle. I'm only human. A lot of opinions have been expressed in this thread. Which are the ones that you are struggling with if you don’t mind me asking ? Mrs That people are being deprived of their liberty and autonomy because others expect them to be considerate. Only one contributor mentioned a deprivation of liberty and autonomy. I think they were talking about freedom of speech, although it wasn’t clear. I don’t think it’s their view that one should not be kind and considerate to others. " Correct. | |||
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" It's sad how people with the assumed moral high ground feel justified in attempting to take away the autonomy and liberty of others in the name of compassion Literally no one is having their liberty or autonomy taken from them, outside of the paranoid imagination of wannabe victims. Seems like you struggle to have compassion for people with different opinions to you When they're outright ludicrous, self-involved opinions, I do struggle. I'm only human. Sounds like you really believe that telling the truth, as you see it, is actually more important than compassion Oo, such a cunning trap you think you're laying! But then, it's almost like context matters, and adults handle different situations differently. So if I see an overweight person, I have no need to upset them by going over and pointing out that they are overweight, even if it is true. But if someone responds to me on a message forum, positing that people are going to jail for not being nice to each other, I feel no constraints in telling them their opinion is a fantasy. It's also fantasy that there's a significant population who would cross the road to go shout abuse at an obese person. What people on your end of the political spectrum do is shove pictures of unhealthy bodies in front of us and scream "body shaming" if we point out biological facts about what is and isn't healthy. " Enjoy beating up those strawmen? I didn't say there is a significant population that shouts abuse at fat people. I was using a very general example of situations that require criticism, and situations that don't. I'm sorry you couldn't follow that. I guess I can try and use smaller words next time? And if there are people who are forcing pictures in front of your eyes and screaming at you, you should probably call the police. Unless of course that is another massive over-exaggeration of a situation that probably never happens. Surely not. I'll go have my tea now. Good luck surviving the night without being arrested for not being nice! | |||
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