FabSwingers.com forum: 30 things about Fred

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Linking this on my profile. Do say hi!

1. Name's Fred, but I prefer Mr Fred. Or Daddy, or Sir.

2. Thoroughbred Leo, born August. I am the superstar of the zodiac.

3. I am the alpha male your mother warned you about.

4. Dog person at heart, but with a wildcatty attitude.

5. Over competitive

6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

7. is my lucky number.

8. I left half of my heart somewhere in Covent Garden, London. The other half is in Barcelona

9. Old school gentleman, with a thing for courtesy.

10. Hopeless romantic. Thank you, Hollywood!

11. Let's get things straight: I am already fucking a staggering (albeit emotionally unavailable) woman, which spends her last dime buying Agent Provocateur lingerie, Manolo Blahnik stilettos, and Christian Louboutin pumps. She is my friend, my queen, my goddess and I literally worship her! She knows I am here, she agrees and no she cannot play as much as she’d want to meet some of the extraordinary people here as she’s not on this continent

One thing’s sure, you're gonna have to top that one way or another (or at least try to compete). I am Procrustes and this is my bed!

12. one more thing: my time is my most valuable resource. Use it wisely! Although I am very playful, I don't have the time, nor the energy for silly, childish mind games or inconsistency. I also don't answer all the messages or right away.

13. Control freak, both in my day to day life and between the sheets.

14. dominant, top. Uber selective! If you get a message or a wink I must have seen some potential. Capitalise on that and please, for the love of God neither a sassy attitude not showing the lack of self esteem are good follow-ups!

15. Few things as a Dom: screaming turns me on a lottle (it's like a little, only a lot). If she doesn't scream, the pleasure or pain is not enough. And I will break you and make you scream!

16. I like brats just a little more than subs. And I love to tease!

17. Pet play doesn't do too much for me, but DDLG does.

18. I like to watch shibari shows as much as the next guy, but I have no desire to master rope. Practicality dictates metal handcuffs.

19. Sine qua non conditions: face slapping, choking, spanking, hair pulling, spitting, biting, in this order.

20. Forced play is my biggest fantasy.

21. Attention deficit disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, narcissistic personality disorder and HISTRIONIC personality disorder (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Histrionic_personality … ). ADD, OCD, NPD, HPD? OMG! right?

22. My biggest weapon is my naughty smile. Comes with dimples.

23. Passionate about entrepreneurship, startups in general and tech startups in particular.

24. Dapper fat cat, with a thing for ties and bow ties. I am usually overdressed.

25. Designer clothes, Ray Ban glasses and Red Bull are my guilty pleasures.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

27. If you wanna strike up a conversation about movies, this is your hook: "Perhaps the only difference between me and other people was that I've always demanded more from the sunset; more spectacular colors when the sun hit the horizon. That's perhaps my only sin."

28. If you wanna strike up a conversation about TV shows, this is your hook: "When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story!". Also: "It's gonna be legen-- wait for it-- and I hope you're not lactose intolerant, because the second half of the word is-- dary! Legendary!"

29. If you wanna strike up a conversation about literature, this is your hook: "I suppose I am a bad fellow—a damn bad fellow. I was born bad, and I have lived bad, and I shall die bad, in all probability."

30. If you wanna strike up a conversation about music, these are your hooks: Frank Sinatra, Jazz, the Stones and last but not least Irish folk. Can somebody explain to me The Mero?

P.S. Zazzy, sassy, bubbly, cocky, smart-assy, avant-garde intellectual. Mister "Always" Right Jr.

P.P.S. beard and thick frames.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

31. Loves writing lots of words.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"31. Loves writing lots of words."

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"31. Loves writing lots of words."

Also toying with erotic literature but that's on fet

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

You have way too much to say for yourself,just get in the kitchen and feed me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well, that bored the shite out of me!

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

It wasn't a request it was a command,so no 'please' required.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Linking this on my profile. Do say hi!

1. Name's Fred, but I prefer Mr Fred. Or Daddy, or Sir.

2. Thoroughbred Leo, born August. I am the superstar of the zodiac.

3. I am the alpha male your mother warned you about.

4. Dog person at heart, but with a wildcatty attitude.

5. Over competitive

6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

7. is my lucky number.

8. I left half of my heart somewhere in Covent Garden, London. The other half is in Barcelona

9. Old school gentleman, with a thing for courtesy.

10. Hopeless romantic. Thank you, Hollywood!

One thing’s sure, you're gonna have to top that one way or another (or at least try to compete). I am Procrustes and this is my bed!

13. Control freak, both in my day to day life and between the sheets.

15. Few things as a Dom: screaming turns me on a lottle (it's like a little, only a lot). If she doesn't scream, the pleasure or pain is not enough. And I will break you and make you scream!

16. I like brats just a little more than subs. And I love to tease!

17. Pet play doesn't do too much for me, but DDLG does.

18. I like to watch shibari shows as much as the next guy, but I have no desire to master rope. Practicality dictates metal handcuffs.

19. Sine qua non conditions: face slapping, choking, spanking, hair pulling, spitting, biting, in this order.

20. Forced play is my biggest fantasy.

22. My biggest weapon is my naughty smile. Comes with dimples.

23. Passionate about entrepreneurship, startups in general and tech startups in particular.

24. Dapper fat cat, with a thing for ties and bow ties. I am usually overdressed.

25. Designer clothes, Ray Ban glasses and Red Bull are my guilty pleasures.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

30. If you wanna strike up a conversation about music, these are your hooks: Frank Sinatra, Jazz, the Stones and last but not least Irish folk. Can somebody explain to me The Mero?

P.S. Zazzy, sassy, bubbly, cocky, smart-assy, avant-garde intellectual. Mister "Always" Right Jr.

P.P.S. beard and thick frames.

Sorry not my type

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Linking this on my profile. Do say hi!

1. Name's Fred, but I prefer Mr Fred. Or Daddy, or Sir.

2. Thoroughbred Leo, born August. I am the superstar of the zodiac.

3. I am the alpha male your mother warned you about.

4. Dog person at heart, but with a wildcatty attitude.

5. Over competitive

6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

7. is my lucky number.

8. I left half of my heart somewhere in Covent Garden, London. The other half is in Barcelona

9. Old school gentleman, with a thing for courtesy.

10. Hopeless romantic. Thank you, Hollywood!

One thing’s sure, you're gonna have to top that one way or another (or at least try to compete). I am Procrustes and this is my bed!

13. Control freak, both in my day to day life and between the sheets.

15. Few things as a Dom: screaming turns me on a lottle (it's like a little, only a lot). If she doesn't scream, the pleasure or pain is not enough. And I will break you and make you scream!

16. I like brats just a little more than subs. And I love to tease!

17. Pet play doesn't do too much for me, but DDLG does.

18. I like to watch shibari shows as much as the next guy, but I have no desire to master rope. Practicality dictates metal handcuffs.

19. Sine qua non conditions: face slapping, choking, spanking, hair pulling, spitting, biting, in this order.

20. Forced play is my biggest fantasy.

22. My biggest weapon is my naughty smile. Comes with dimples.

23. Passionate about entrepreneurship, startups in general and tech startups in particular.

24. Dapper fat cat, with a thing for ties and bow ties. I am usually overdressed.

25. Designer clothes, Ray Ban glasses and Red Bull are my guilty pleasures.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

30. If you wanna strike up a conversation about music, these are your hooks: Frank Sinatra, Jazz, the Stones and last but not least Irish folk. Can somebody explain to me The Mero?

P.S. Zazzy, sassy, bubbly, cocky, smart-assy, avant-garde intellectual. Mister "Always" Right Jr.

P.P.S. beard and thick frames.

Sorry not my type

It was the lack of cooking wasn't it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That was more demanding than any woman’s profile I’ve seen on Fab.

32. Pretentious, moi!

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"That was more demanding than any woman’s profile I’ve seen on Fab.

32. Pretentious, moi! "

Fake male profile, woman pretending to be a man?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That was more demanding than any woman’s profile I’ve seen on Fab.

32. Pretentious, moi!

Fake male profile, woman pretending to be a man?"

Ooh you've spotted that rarest of profiles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good for you OP!! People are always whining about men that have no profiles. They also whine about men that have long profiles.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Good for you OP!! People are always whining about men that have no profiles. They also whine about men that have long profiles.

Its Fab. People whine about anything and everything.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

All about giving interesting peeps something to pick up on. Less whining, more craic to be had I say

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"31. Loves writing lots of words.

Also toying with erotic literature but that's on fet

Is it a bit saucy for here

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

32 Likes to his behind women in his photo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party. "

Huh ?!

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party.

Huh ?!"

33. Fred is coming to terms with "reply+quote"

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Is that something you've nicked from fb?

Can you summarize? I didn't get past point 6

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd like you to elaborate on point 6 please.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"I'd like you to elaborate on point 6 please. "

You just made me look at point 6.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well, that bored the shite out of me!

I didn't read it all, I was bored by point 5

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He's too sexy for his shirt

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

[Removed by poster at 20/05/18 15:30:11]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Linking this on my profile. Do say hi!

1. Name's Fred, but I prefer Mr Fred. Or Daddy, or Sir.

2. Thoroughbred Leo, born August. I am the superstar of the zodiac.

3. I am the alpha male your mother warned you about.

4. Dog person at heart, but with a wildcatty attitude.

5. Over competitive

6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

7. is my lucky number.

8. I left half of my heart somewhere in Covent Garden, London. The other half is in Barcelona

9. Old school gentleman, with a thing for courtesy.

10. Hopeless romantic. Thank you, Hollywood!

One thing’s sure, you're gonna have to top that one way or another (or at least try to compete). I am Procrustes and this is my bed!

13. Control freak, both in my day to day life and between the sheets.

15. Few things as a Dom: screaming turns me on a lottle (it's like a little, only a lot). If she doesn't scream, the pleasure or pain is not enough. And I will break you and make you scream!

16. I like brats just a little more than subs. And I love to tease!

17. Pet play doesn't do too much for me, but DDLG does.

18. I like to watch shibari shows as much as the next guy, but I have no desire to master rope. Practicality dictates metal handcuffs.

19. Sine qua non conditions: face slapping, choking, spanking, hair pulling, spitting, biting, in this order.

20. Forced play is my biggest fantasy.

22. My biggest weapon is my naughty smile. Comes with dimples.

23. Passionate about entrepreneurship, startups in general and tech startups in particular.

24. Dapper fat cat, with a thing for ties and bow ties. I am usually overdressed.

25. Designer clothes, Ray Ban glasses and Red Bull are my guilty pleasures.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

30. If you wanna strike up a conversation about music, these are your hooks: Frank Sinatra, Jazz, the Stones and last but not least Irish folk. Can somebody explain to me The Mero?

P.S. Zazzy, sassy, bubbly, cocky, smart-assy, avant-garde intellectual. Mister "Always" Right Jr.

P.P.S. beard and thick frames.

Meh.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party. "

Damn I was trying to be number 14 did it not work.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

I often see blokes profiles and think "fuck, I wish I'd thought of writing that!!!"

Today was not one of those days.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party.

Damn I was trying to be number 14 did it not work."

WILL YOU PEOPLE STOP MAKING ME GO BACK AND READING IT!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

This is funny. Grammar Nazi, yet OP has spelt traveller - traveler

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party.

Damn I was trying to be number 14 did it not work.

WILL YOU PEOPLE STOP MAKING ME GO BACK AND READING IT!!!!!!!

I like number 3,8,11,17,24 and 31 as well.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party.

Damn I was trying to be number 14 did it not work.

WILL YOU PEOPLE STOP MAKING ME GO BACK AND READING IT!!!!!!!

I like number 3,8,11,17,24 and 31 as well."

I'm not falling for it, there isn't a 24 is there.......

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By *dam_TinaCouple
over a year ago

Hampshire

32. Attempts to be mysterious, interesting and intellectual.

33. Fails at 32.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

This is funny. Grammar Nazi, yet OP has spelt traveller - traveler

I was just going to pick him up on that!

And the staggering woman....is she pissed

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party.

Damn I was trying to be number 14 did it not work.

WILL YOU PEOPLE STOP MAKING ME GO BACK AND READING IT!!!!!!!

I like number 3,8,11,17,24 and 31 as well.

I'm not falling for it, there isn't a 24 is there.......

I'm not as stupid as I look you know.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party.

Damn I was trying to be number 14 did it not work.

WILL YOU PEOPLE STOP MAKING ME GO BACK AND READING IT!!!!!!!

I like number 3,8,11,17,24 and 31 as well.

I'm not falling for it, there isn't a 24 is there.......

I'm not as stupid as I look you know."

You look........unavailable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You just know he’s a hipster.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

This is funny. Grammar Nazi, yet OP has spelt traveller - traveler

I was just going to pick him up on that!

And the staggering woman....is she pissed"

No, she's just staggering about because he didn't use enough Chloroform!

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"You just know he’s a hipster."

Skinny jeans, goatee, manbun hipster?

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party.

Damn I was trying to be number 14 did it not work.

WILL YOU PEOPLE STOP MAKING ME GO BACK AND READING IT!!!!!!!

I like number 3,8,11,17,24 and 31 as well.

I'm not falling for it, there isn't a 24 is there.......

I'm not as stupid as I look you know.

You look........unavailable.

Unavailable and a bit stupid...yep.

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

This is funny. Grammar Nazi, yet OP has spelt traveller - traveler

I was just going to pick him up on that!

And the staggering woman....is she pissed"

He also uses ‘which’ to describe her. Just... no.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party.

Damn I was trying to be number 14 did it not work.

WILL YOU PEOPLE STOP MAKING ME GO BACK AND READING IT!!!!!!!

I like number 3,8,11,17,24 and 31 as well.

I'm not falling for it, there isn't a 24 is there.......

I'm not as stupid as I look you know.

You look........unavailable.

Unavailable and a bit stupid...yep."

You're FAR from stupid!!!

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

This is funny. Grammar Nazi, yet OP has spelt traveller - traveler

I was just going to pick him up on that!

And the staggering woman....is she pissed

He also uses ‘which’ to describe her. Just... no."

I like that he "exceptionally meets.."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

This is funny. Grammar Nazi, yet OP has spelt traveller - traveler

I was just going to pick him up on that!

And the staggering woman....is she pissed

He also uses ‘which’ to describe her. Just... no."

I noticed that. Not long after he was blabbing about how much he worships and adores this lady, he follows it up by describing her as an object and not a person. Classy guy.

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"Linking this on my profile. Do say hi!

1. Name's Fred, but I prefer Mr Fred. Or Daddy, or Sir.

2. Thoroughbred Leo, born August. I am the superstar of the zodiac.

3. I am the alpha male your mother warned you about.

4. Dog person at heart, but with a wildcatty attitude.

5. Over competitive

6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

7. is my lucky number.

8. I left half of my heart somewhere in Covent Garden, London. The other half is in Barcelona

9. Old school gentleman, with a thing for courtesy.

10. Hopeless romantic. Thank you, Hollywood!

One thing’s sure, you're gonna have to top that one way or another (or at least try to compete). I am Procrustes and this is my bed!

13. Control freak, both in my day to day life and between the sheets.

15. Few things as a Dom: screaming turns me on a lottle (it's like a little, only a lot). If she doesn't scream, the pleasure or pain is not enough. And I will break you and make you scream!

16. I like brats just a little more than subs. And I love to tease!

17. Pet play doesn't do too much for me, but DDLG does.

18. I like to watch shibari shows as much as the next guy, but I have no desire to master rope. Practicality dictates metal handcuffs.

19. Sine qua non conditions: face slapping, choking, spanking, hair pulling, spitting, biting, in this order.

20. Forced play is my biggest fantasy.

22. My biggest weapon is my naughty smile. Comes with dimples.

23. Passionate about entrepreneurship, startups in general and tech startups in particular.

24. Dapper fat cat, with a thing for ties and bow ties. I am usually overdressed.

25. Designer clothes, Ray Ban glasses and Red Bull are my guilty pleasures.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

30. If you wanna strike up a conversation about music, these are your hooks: Frank Sinatra, Jazz, the Stones and last but not least Irish folk. Can somebody explain to me The Mero?

P.S. Zazzy, sassy, bubbly, cocky, smart-assy, avant-garde intellectual. Mister "Always" Right Jr.

P.P.S. beard and thick frames.

I can now see what people mean when they say the forums can be a great filter .

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By *olden RatioWoman
over a year ago

Buckinghamshire

Since I don’t own any Louboutins or Agent Provocateur I’ll step out of the queue.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Unsubstantiated. Random. The only random commands I take are for cocktails when I throw a party.

Damn I was trying to be number 14 did it not work.

WILL YOU PEOPLE STOP MAKING ME GO BACK AND READING IT!!!!!!!

I like number 3,8,11,17,24 and 31 as well.

I'm not falling for it, there isn't a 24 is there.......

I'm not as stupid as I look you know.

You look........unavailable.

Unavailable and a bit stupid...yep.

You're FAR from stupid!!!

I am,but no worries I've made it to 50 year's of age without too much trauma.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Linking this on my profile. Do say hi!

1. Name's Fred, but I prefer Mr Fred. Or Daddy, or Sir.

2. Thoroughbred Leo, born August. I am the superstar of the zodiac.

3. I am the alpha male your mother warned you about.

4. Dog person at heart, but with a wildcatty attitude.

5. Over competitive

6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

7. is my lucky number.

8. I left half of my heart somewhere in Covent Garden, London. The other half is in Barcelona

9. Old school gentleman, with a thing for courtesy.

10. Hopeless romantic. Thank you, Hollywood!

One thing’s sure, you're gonna have to top that one way or another (or at least try to compete). I am Procrustes and this is my bed!

13. Control freak, both in my day to day life and between the sheets.

15. Few things as a Dom: screaming turns me on a lottle (it's like a little, only a lot). If she doesn't scream, the pleasure or pain is not enough. And I will break you and make you scream!

16. I like brats just a little more than subs. And I love to tease!

17. Pet play doesn't do too much for me, but DDLG does.

18. I like to watch shibari shows as much as the next guy, but I have no desire to master rope. Practicality dictates metal handcuffs.

19. Sine qua non conditions: face slapping, choking, spanking, hair pulling, spitting, biting, in this order.

20. Forced play is my biggest fantasy.

22. My biggest weapon is my naughty smile. Comes with dimples.

23. Passionate about entrepreneurship, startups in general and tech startups in particular.

24. Dapper fat cat, with a thing for ties and bow ties. I am usually overdressed.

25. Designer clothes, Ray Ban glasses and Red Bull are my guilty pleasures.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

30. If you wanna strike up a conversation about music, these are your hooks: Frank Sinatra, Jazz, the Stones and last but not least Irish folk. Can somebody explain to me The Mero?

P.S. Zazzy, sassy, bubbly, cocky, smart-assy, avant-garde intellectual. Mister "Always" Right Jr.

P.P.S. beard and thick frames.

Just to clarify, are you looking for a bearded woman with thick glasses Op ?

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By *anandLeia72Couple
over a year ago

St. Helens

"Since I don’t own any Louboutins or Agent Provocateur I’ll step out of the queue."

Yeah, that's me out too. Just makes you feel so inadequate doesn't it?

Leia

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By *anandLeia72Couple
over a year ago

St. Helens

"Since I don’t own any Louboutins or Agent Provocateur I’ll step out of the queue.

Yeah, that's me out too. Just makes you feel so inadequate doesn't it?

Leia "

Got to number 3 and just skipped to the end.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How’s this thread working out for you Op ?

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"Since I don’t own any Louboutins or Agent Provocateur I’ll step out of the queue.

Yeah, that's me out too. Just makes you feel so inadequate doesn't it?

Leia "

I hope that’s sarcasm.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to clarify, are you looking for a bearded woman with thick glasses Op ?"

I'm in!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Since I don’t own any Louboutins or Agent Provocateur I’ll step out of the queue.

Yeah, that's me out too. Just makes you feel so inadequate doesn't it?

Leia

Got to number 3 and just skipped to the end. "

I think it was Colonel mustard, in the drawing room with the lead pipe.

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"Got to number 3 and just skipped to the end. "

By which time you were wondering how many other alpha males describe themselves as ‘wildcatty’, ‘zazzy’, ‘sassy’, or ‘bubbly’...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I skim read the OP and your overly long profile, then as I got to the bottom it said your body type was 'average'.

Oh the irony.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Some people are taking this way to seriously.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd like you to elaborate on point 6 please.

You just made me look at point 6.

Would you like him to elaborate on it too?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people are taking this way to seriously."

Is it not serious then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people are taking this way to seriously.

Is it not serious then? "

It ain't funny either!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people are taking this way to seriously."

You mean it's all a joke? Aaaaah, well had I known that i wouldn't have made a joke.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Got to number 3 and just skipped to the end.

By which time you were wondering how many other alpha males describe themselves as ‘wildcatty’, ‘zazzy’, ‘sassy’, or ‘bubbly’..."

Perhaps a discussion on "Alpha males" is in order?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Weird how women complain about men not reading their 40,000 word profiles yet bitch about men that make an effort with theirs.

If OP was a woman he'd be getting hugs and flowers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people are taking this way to seriously.

Is it not serious then?

It ain't funny either!

I was expecting some interesting dialogue and debate on this thread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Weird how women complain about men not reading their 40,000 word profiles yet bitch about men that make an effort with theirs.

If OP was a woman he'd be getting hugs and flowers.

And licks. Don't forget the licks.

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"Perhaps a discussion on "Alpha males" is in order?"

Another one? The last one wasn’t cringeworthy enough for you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people are taking this way to seriously.

Is it not serious then?

It ain't funny either!

I was expecting some interesting dialogue and debate on this thread. "

There's not really anything to debate either. What is the point of all this again? As in this thread

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By *londieddWoman
over a year ago

fife

"Wanna"

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Some people are taking this way to seriously.

Is it not serious then? "

I haven't a clue,should I be taking it seriously?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Weird how women complain about men not reading their 40,000 word profiles yet bitch about men that make an effort with theirs.

If OP was a woman he'd be getting hugs and flowers.

We need a woman to test the theory! Not me though, I'm not interesting enough for 30 points.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Weird how women complain about men not reading their 40,000 word profiles yet bitch about men that make an effort with theirs.

If OP was a woman he'd be getting hugs and flowers.

If the OP was a woman, the thread would already have reached the 175 limit by now. Mainly due to guys licking ass!

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

That’s 2 minutes of my life I’ll never get back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Weird how women complain about men not reading their 40,000 word profiles yet bitch about men that make an effort with theirs.

If OP was a woman he'd be getting hugs and flowers.

No he wouldn’t, we would be doing exactly the same, if it was posted on the forum.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Perhaps a discussion on "Alpha males" is in order?

Another one? The last one wasn’t cringeworthy enough for you?"

You find a lot cringeworthy don't you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps a discussion on "Alpha males" is in order?

Another one? The last one wasn’t cringeworthy enough for you?

You find a lot cringeworthy don't you."

Ironically he does.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Weird how women complain about men not reading their 40,000 word profiles yet bitch about men that make an effort with theirs.

If OP was a woman he'd be getting hugs and flowers.

We need a woman to test the theory! Not me though, I'm not interesting enough for 30 points. "

I'm game but I can't be bothered to write more than I have already.

I'd also need a cleavage or arse pic as my avatar and I have neither.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Some people are taking this way to seriously.

You mean it's all a joke? Aaaaah, well had I known that i wouldn't have made a joke."

Go on give us a joke.

I think everyone should do their list of 30 and let's see how interesting they actually are. Mine would be rubbish.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Weird how women complain about men not reading their 40,000 word profiles yet bitch about men that make an effort with theirs.

If OP was a woman he'd be getting hugs and flowers.

I very much doubt that.

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By *he Silver FuxMan
over a year ago

Uttoxeter

This seems to be a list of many reasons to avoid Fred.

I wonder what would happen if you failed to use the ‘hooks’

he’s provided for conversation? It may be that this narcissistic construct has rehearsed and researched these topics and couldn’t cope with anything tangential..

The fact that he started this thread about himself is a bit of a red flag...

... or he could be a very nice man

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people are taking this way to seriously.

You mean it's all a joke? Aaaaah, well had I known that i wouldn't have made a joke.

Go on give us a joke.

I think everyone should do their list of 30 and let's see how interesting they actually are. Mine would be rubbish."

Actually I just read it, and it's quite good social commentary

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP, what's DDLG?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You had me at Fred...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OP, what's DDLG?"

Daddy Dom/little girl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps a discussion on "Alpha males" is in order?

Another one? The last one wasn’t cringeworthy enough for you?"

Was I present on it? I have a terrible memory and can't recall a recent one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OP, what's DDLG?"

Still going to stick up for him after you find out ?

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By *essica jamiesonWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

What a strange man! And lol @ mr fred! Cannot stand folk rattling off designer names she would spend her last penny on! And u have to compete against her pahahahaha! Ive rang u a taxi byeeeee! Lol absolute gonk of a man

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people are taking this way to seriously.

You mean it's all a joke? Aaaaah, well had I known that i wouldn't have made a joke.

Go on give us a joke.

I think everyone should do their list of 30 and let's see how interesting they actually are. Mine would be rubbish."

I think you have to be a narcissistic to do one!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OP, what's DDLG?

Daddy Dom/little girl"

Thank you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OP, what's DDLG?

Still going to stick up for him after you find out ?"

It's not my thing/ fetish but some people like it. Why do you have a problem with it?

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By *witch4Fun24Couple
over a year ago

Leicester

[Removed by poster at 20/05/18 16:35:44]

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Your biggest weapon is your naughty smile ~ I'm out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OP, what's DDLG?

Still going to stick up for him after you find out ?

It's not my thing/ fetish but some people like it. Why do you have a problem with it?"

It’s not my thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your biggest weapon is your naughty smile ~ I'm out

Is this Dragons Den?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With reference to point 11: Most, if not almost all, women on here would fall vastly short of living up to his expectations, thereby, making this thread pointless to most, if not all, of us.

Unless, of course, Fred (not my ideal Alpha male name-should be James or John) is only looking for a discussion about his 30 points and isn't using it to attract women.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't quite understand the idea of competing against someone.

Especially someone that throws around designer names like we should be impressed. I'd rather meet someone that spent their money sensibly.

Each to their own I guess.

Not that I'm what he's looking for but I've had enough of wannabe doms.

Good luck Fred.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"I'd like you to elaborate on point 6 please.

You just made me look at point 6.

Would you like him to elaborate on it too?"

Please.............No.

I'm beginning to feel sorry for Fred.

I might just re-write my profile.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Some people are taking this way to seriously.

You mean it's all a joke? Aaaaah, well had I known that i wouldn't have made a joke.

Go on give us a joke.

I think everyone should do their list of 30 and let's see how interesting they actually are. Mine would be rubbish.

I think you have to be a narcissistic to do one!"

Tempted aren't you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thought I'd best go back and read it all I had a spare 20 mins.

Ooh, just like Lily Allen said, you'll never make me scream. Im out.

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"You find a lot cringeworthy don't you."

I can’t say I’ve been keeping count.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd like you to elaborate on point 6 please.

You just made me look at point 6.

Would you like him to elaborate on it too?

Please.............No.

I'm beginning to feel sorry for Fred.

I might just re-write my profile."

I like hearing other peoples' experiences in other countries.

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

I like Fred.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The truth be told, the truth be told

I'm treading on my tippy toes, my tippy toes

I'm starting to worry about Fred..

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

I'll say one thing about Fred, he's not lacking in confidence.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people are taking this way to seriously.

You mean it's all a joke? Aaaaah, well had I known that i wouldn't have made a joke.

Go on give us a joke.

I think everyone should do their list of 30 and let's see how interesting they actually are. Mine would be rubbish.

I think you have to be a narcissistic to do one!

Tempted aren't you."

Think you misunderstood my comment, it was a dig at the Op and saying you aren’t one, so I wouldn’t bother.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Some people are taking this way to seriously.

You mean it's all a joke? Aaaaah, well had I known that i wouldn't have made a joke.

Go on give us a joke.

I think everyone should do their list of 30 and let's see how interesting they actually are. Mine would be rubbish.

I think you have to be a narcissistic to do one!

Tempted aren't you.

Think you misunderstood my comment, it was a dig at the Op and saying you aren’t one, so I wouldn’t bother."

I think I understood. I think.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll say one thing about Fred, he's not lacking in confidence. "

He's too sexy for his shirt..

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"I'll say one thing about Fred, he's not lacking in confidence.

He's too sexy for his shirt.. "

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Oh, guys and girls this was meant to be just the TLDR part for the profile.

Also out on a social just after posting but I scanning through the thread I am overwhelmed.

Will reply to some swiftly I promise.

If there was a woman who’d like all 30 I’d have married her and we’d be in a dull marriage as we’d have nothing to fight about right?

While I appreciate the less positive comments and I try to take the best out of them one thing that’s not gonna happen any time soon is changing anything because of the crowd! I’d rather keep an eye open for them who enjoy 10 traits out of 30 and have a laugh. Which is what I’m doing right now

Cheers

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

[Removed by poster at 20/05/18 17:49:45]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh, guys and girls this was meant to be just the TLDR part for the profile.

Also out on a social just after posting but I scanning through the thread I am overwhelmed.

Will reply to some swiftly I promise.

If there was a woman who’d like all 30 I’d have married her and we’d be in a dull marriage as we’d have nothing to fight about right?

Cheers"

Do you think anyone on here can live up to your expectations?

You're quite demanding after all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh, guys and girls this was meant to be just the TLDR part for the profile.

Also out on a social just after posting but I scanning through the thread I am overwhelmed.

Will reply to some swiftly I promise.

If there was a woman who’d like all 30 I’d have married her and we’d be in a dull marriage as we’d have nothing to fight about right?

Cheers

Do you think anyone on here can live up to your expectations?

You're quite demanding after all. "

On behalf of Everyman on the site, welcome to our world.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi Fredo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh, guys and girls this was meant to be just the TLDR part for the profile.

Also out on a social just after posting but I scanning through the thread I am overwhelmed.

Will reply to some swiftly I promise.

If there was a woman who’d like all 30 I’d have married her and we’d be in a dull marriage as we’d have nothing to fight about right?

Cheers

Do you think anyone on here can live up to your expectations?

You're quite demanding after all.

On behalf of Everyman on the site, welcome to our world."

Are all women demanding?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi Fredo "

Fredo sounds more Alpha male than Fred.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh, guys and girls this was meant to be just the TLDR part for the profile.

Also out on a social just after posting but I scanning through the thread I am overwhelmed.

Will reply to some swiftly I promise.

If there was a woman who’d like all 30 I’d have married her and we’d be in a dull marriage as we’d have nothing to fight about right?

Cheers

Do you think anyone on here can live up to your expectations?

You're quite demanding after all.

On behalf of Everyman on the site, welcome to our world.

Are all women demanding?"

Very

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By *anandLeia72Couple
over a year ago

St. Helens

Just read one of his guilty pleasures is designer clothes. Doesn't come close to my curry pot noodle.

Leia

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi Fredo "

Wasn't that a chocolate bar for kids?

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Hi Fredo

Wasn't that a chocolate bar for kids?"

Still is.... And a guideline for inflation.... 30 frigging pence now a days!

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By *urlesque!Woman
over a year ago

Gloucester

"Linking this on my profile. Do say hi!

1. Name's Fred, but I prefer Mr Fred. Or Daddy, or Sir.

2. Thoroughbred Leo, born August. I am the superstar of the zodiac.

...

....

P.P.S. beard and thick frames.

I shortened the profile not to take up too much space on here. OP I actually love it. I am outside your age range but I must say, I find profiles such as yours so much more appealing than the one to three liners.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"I'd like you to elaborate on point 6 please.

You just made me look at point 6.

Would you like him to elaborate on it too?

Please.............No.

I'm beginning to feel sorry for Fred.

I might just re-write my profile.

I like hearing other peoples' experiences in other countries. "

I've been to the Isle of Wight and Wales if that helps.....

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By *aul DeUther-OneMan
over a year ago

Sussex

"That was more demanding than any woman’s profile I’ve seen on Fab.

32. Pretentious, moi!

Fake male profile, woman pretending to be a man?"

33. Fab straight

34. On fabs 'over a year' and yet no verifications

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That was more demanding than any woman’s profile I’ve seen on Fab.

32. Pretentious, moi!

Fake male profile, woman pretending to be a man?

33. Fab straight

34. On fabs 'over a year' and yet no verifications"

He is verified? How do you know he's fab straight?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd like you to elaborate on point 6 please.

You just made me look at point 6.

Would you like him to elaborate on it too?

Please.............No.

I'm beginning to feel sorry for Fred.

I might just re-write my profile.

I like hearing other peoples' experiences in other countries.

I've been to the Isle of Wight and Wales if that helps....."

And you came back to England??

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By *ooby birdWoman
over a year ago

North West

"Since I don’t own any Louboutins or Agent Provocateur I’ll step out of the queue.

Yeah, that's me out too. Just makes you feel so inadequate doesn't it?

Leia "

I'm guessing George from asda won't cut it then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Linking this on my profile. Do say hi!

1. Name's Fred, but I prefer Mr Fred. Or Daddy, or Sir.

2. Thoroughbred Leo, born August. I am the superstar of the zodiac.

...

....

P.P.S. beard and thick frames.

That many single females and couples have, you mean? I can't talk about the men's as I don't look at those.

Will fill in later is a real favourite!

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"I'd like you to elaborate on point 6 please.

You just made me look at point 6.

Would you like him to elaborate on it too?

Please.............No.

I'm beginning to feel sorry for Fred.

I might just re-write my profile.

I like hearing other peoples' experiences in other countries.

I've been to the Isle of Wight and Wales if that helps.....

And you came back to England?? "

Home is where the heart is....

Actually, if that's true, my home is in Hell.

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By *inky SpiceWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Oh, guys and girls this was meant to be just the TLDR part for the profile.

Also out on a social just after posting but I scanning through the thread I am overwhelmed.

Will reply to some swiftly I promise.

If there was a woman who’d like all 30 I’d have married her and we’d be in a dull marriage as we’d have nothing to fight about right?

Cheers"

Well I quite liked your list OP, definitely more than 10 traits

, and also your response to the usual forum bashing, well played

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"33. Fab straight

How do you know he's fab straight?"

Its obviously not exactly scientific, but the OP does rather read that way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"33. Fab straight

How do you know he's fab straight?

Its obviously not exactly scientific, but the OP does rather read that way."

How?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Point 11 contradicts point 26.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"33. Fab straight

How do you know he's fab straight?

Its obviously not exactly scientific, but the OP does rather read that way.

How? "

I couldn't see it myself.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"33. Fab straight

How do you know he's fab straight?

Its obviously not exactly scientific, but the OP does rather read that way.

How? "

It's OK, he reads what he wants things to say, not what they actually say.

#he's got form

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"33. Fab straight

How do you know he's fab straight?

Its obviously not exactly scientific, but the OP does rather read that way.

How?

It's OK, he reads what he wants things to say, not what they actually say.

#he's got form

Is it his histrionic personality?

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By *uteLittleGeekWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere

Fred ,

let me educate you about the floggers, as the one on your profile photo looks so cheap !

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"33. Fab straight

How do you know he's fab straight?

Its obviously not exactly scientific, but the OP does rather read that way.

How?

It's OK, he reads what he wants things to say, not what they actually say.

#he's got form

Is it his histrionic personality? "

Just his belligerent and aggressive posting and how he shouts down anyone who holds a differing viewpoint.

Other than that I 'spect he's a fine feller.

Mind you, he prob'ly thinks I'm a cnut so no biggie.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"33. Fab straight

How do you know he's fab straight?

Its obviously not exactly scientific, but the OP does rather read that way.

How?

It's OK, he reads what he wants things to say, not what they actually say.

#he's got form

Is it his histrionic personality?

Just his belligerent and aggressive posting and how he shouts down anyone who holds a differing viewpoint.

Other than that I 'spect he's a fine feller.

Mind you, he prob'ly thinks I'm a cnut so no biggie.....

Sorry, I meant the OP

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Point 11 contradicts point 26."

I've spoken to you before about making me go and look.....

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"33. Fab straight

How do you know he's fab straight?

Its obviously not exactly scientific, but the OP does rather read that way.

How?

It's OK, he reads what he wants things to say, not what they actually say.

#he's got form

Is it his histrionic personality?

Just his belligerent and aggressive posting and how he shouts down anyone who holds a differing viewpoint.

Other than that I 'spect he's a fine feller.

Mind you, he prob'ly thinks I'm a cnut so no biggie.....

Sorry, I meant the OP

I've no idea what the OP thinks about me.

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"Just his belligerent and aggressive posting and how he shouts down anyone who holds a differing viewpoint."

And I’m the one who reads what I want to read.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Just his belligerent and aggressive posting and how he shouts down anyone who holds a differing viewpoint.

And I’m the one who reads what I want to read."

That's what I said.

I also said you're probly a fine fella. But well done on missing that bit.

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"How? "

A large portion of the adjectives he uses to describe himself are best suited to describing someone who is particularly camp. Like I say, it’s not exactly a scientific method, and I wouldn’t for a minute suggest that it’s conclusive proof, but it’s the flavour I got from reading it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How?

Zazzy, sassy and bubbly are definitely different descriptions for someone who defines themselves as an alpha male.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"How?

Zazzy, sassy and bubbly are definitely different descriptions for someone who defines themselves as an alpha male. "

Wildcatty attitude was the one that struck me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

TL:DR

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Point 11 contradicts point 26.

I've spoken to you before about making me go and look.....

Not my fault you're a nosy git

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well, that bored the shite out of me!

I didn't read it all, I was bored by point 5

I stopped at 11. I want no second hand Dom

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

This is funny. Grammar Nazi, yet OP has spelt traveller - traveler

American English

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi Fredo

Fredo sounds more Alpha male than Fred.

No, just more edible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Linking this on my profile. Do say hi!

1. Name's Fred, but I prefer Mr Fred. Or Daddy, or Sir.

2. Thoroughbred Leo, born August. I am the superstar of the zodiac.

...

....

P.P.S. beard and thick frames.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi Fredo

Fredo sounds more Alpha male than Fred.

No, just more edible

That's Fraydo, as in The Godfather, not Freddo, as in the chocolate bar

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By *londieddWoman
over a year ago

fife

"Hi Fredo

Fredo sounds more Alpha male than Fred.

No, just more edible

That's Fraydo, as in The Godfather, not Freddo, as in the chocolate bar

Not had a freddo for years, bet they're not 10p now?

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"Hi Fredo

Wasn't that a chocolate bar for kids?

Still is.... And a guideline for inflation.... 30 frigging pence now a days! "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi Fredo

Fredo sounds more Alpha male than Fred.

No, just more edible

That's Fraydo, as in The Godfather, not Freddo, as in the chocolate bar

Not had a freddo for years, bet they're not 10p now?"

25p and they do a caramel one now too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi Fredo

Wasn't that a chocolate bar for kids?

Still is.... And a guideline for inflation.... 30 frigging pence now a days! "

It rhymes with credo, not hedeaux

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By *rsTrellisWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"Linking this on my profile. Do say hi!

1. Name's Fred, but I prefer Mr Fred. Or Daddy, or Sir. "

The name’s Mrs Trellis. You can call me Mrs Trellis.

" 2. Thoroughbred Leo, born August. I am the superstar of the zodiac. "

Unscientific bollocks.

" 3. I am the alpha male your mother warned you about. "

My mum is the mother the alpha males warned you about.

" 4. Dog person at heart, but with a wildcatty attitude. "

Cats rule.

" 5. Over competitive "

You’re not a cheater are you (see 4 above)? See what I did there? Wild cats? Cheater? Language joke. I is brainee innit.

" 6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries. "

On the run?

" 7. is my lucky number. "

Unscientific bollocks.

" 8. I left half of my heart somewhere in Covent Garden, London. The other half is in Barcelona "

Try Transport for London lost property.

" 9. Old school gentleman, with a thing for courtesy. "

I love courteous spitting.

" 10. Hopeless romantic. Thank you, Hollywood! "

I love romantic face slapping.

" 11. Let's get things straight: I am already fucking a staggering (albeit emotionally unavailable) woman, which spends her last dime buying Agent Provocateur lingerie, Manolo Blahnik stilettos, and Christian Louboutin pumps. She is my friend, my queen, my goddess and I literally worship her! She knows I am here, she agrees and no she cannot play as much as she’d want to meet some of the extraordinary people here as she’s not on this continent

One thing’s sure, you're gonna have to top that one way or another (or at least try to compete). I am Procrustes and this is my bed! "

Ooooo. Pick me! Pick me! I know I’m not as good as her but I hope you’ll lower your high standards to consider me. I’m willing to compete. I have Tesco pants (high leg).

" 12. one more thing: my time is my most valuable resource. Use it wisely! Although I am very playful, I don't have the time, nor the energy for silly, childish mind games or inconsistency. I also don't answer all the messages or right away. "

It’s understandable. You’ll, no doubt, be inundated.

" 13. Control freak, both in my day to day life and between the sheets. "

You don’t say.

" 14. dominant, top. Uber selective! If you get a message or a wink I must have seen some potential. Capitalise on that and please, for the love of God neither a sassy attitude not showing the lack of self esteem are good follow-ups! "

High self esteem - tick.

Willingness to compete for your affection with your fancy-pants goddess from point 11 - tick.

Oh wait...

" 15. Few things as a Dom: screaming turns me on a lottle (it's like a little, only a lot). If she doesn't scream, the pleasure or pain is not enough. And I will break you and make you scream! "

As a Dom, you’ll need to check whether I want breaking. It does sound romantic though. Thanks Hollywood.

" 16. I like brats just a little more than subs. And I love to tease! "

Are you teasing now?

" 17. Pet play doesn't do too much for me, but DDLG does. "

FFS, after you said you loved dogs, I put on my Fido costume.

" 18. I like to watch shibari shows as much as the next guy, but I have no desire to master rope. Practicality dictates metal handcuffs. "

I like cooking shows as much as the next guy but I have no desire to whip up a soufflé.

" 19. Sine qua non conditions: face slapping, choking, spanking, hair pulling, spitting, biting, in this order. "

They have to be in that order? What if I want to be spat on, THEN slapped, THEN talked down to in Latin?

" 20. Forced play is my biggest fantasy. "

I had a funny feeling it might be.

A great way to start negotiations for “forced play” is to list the things that WILL happen to the participant, prior to any discussions.

" 21. Attention deficit disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, narcissistic personality disorder and HISTRIONIC personality disorder (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Histrionic_personality … ). ADD, OCD, NPD, HPD? OMG! right? "

I don’t need your medical history.

" 22. My biggest weapon is my naughty smile. Comes with dimples. "

Cute.

" 23. Passionate about entrepreneurship, startups in general and tech startups in particular. "

Ok...

" 24. Dapper fat cat, with a thing for ties and bow ties. I am usually overdressed. "

I’m fat too. We have something in common there.

" 25. Designer clothes, Ray Ban glasses and Red Bull are my guilty pleasures. "

Next clothes, contact lenses, Diet Coke.

" 26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei! "

I see what you did there. You took the words from the gates of Auschwitz and made them into a grammar joke. Very sapiosexual.

" 27. If you wanna strike up a conversation about movies, this is your hook: "Perhaps the only difference between me and other people was that I've always demanded more from the sunset; more spectacular colors when the sun hit the horizon. That's perhaps my only sin." "

Not a Scooby. Did you like Dirty Dancing?

" 28. If you wanna strike up a conversation about TV shows, this is your hook: "When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story!". Also: "It's gonna be legen-- wait for it-- and I hope you're not lactose intolerant, because the second half of the word is-- dary! Legendary!" "

Nope. But I love Homes Under the Hammer.

" 29. If you wanna strike up a conversation about literature, this is your hook: "I suppose I am a bad fellow—a damn bad fellow. I was born bad, and I have lived bad, and I shall die bad, in all probability." "

Are you hoping I’ll Google these quotes to prove I’m worthy?

" 30. If you wanna strike up a conversation about music, these are your hooks: Frank Sinatra, Jazz, the Stones and last but not least Irish folk. Can somebody explain to me The Mero? "

Sigh.

" P.S. Zazzy, sassy, bubbly, cocky, smart-assy, avant-garde intellectual. Mister "Always" Right Jr. "

I’d agree that you’re at least one of those.

" P.P.S. beard and thick frames. "

Massive pubic hair and contact lenses. Please pick me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi Fredo

Wasn't that a chocolate bar for kids?

Still is.... And a guideline for inflation.... 30 frigging pence now a days!

It rhymes with credo, not hedeaux "

It does, because freddo, as in the chocolate bar has two d's. So like the op, I was taking a little bit of artistic licence.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi Fredo

Fredo sounds more Alpha male than Fred.

No, just more edible

That's Fraydo, as in The Godfather, not Freddo, as in the chocolate bar

I'm usually hot on my spelling

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Linking this on my profile. Do say hi!

1. Name's Fred, but I prefer Mr Fred. Or Daddy, or Sir.

The name’s Mrs Trellis. You can call me Mrs Trellis.

2. Thoroughbred Leo, born August. I am the superstar of the zodiac.

Unscientific bollocks.

3. I am the alpha male your mother warned you about.

My mum is the mother the alpha males warned you about.

4. Dog person at heart, but with a wildcatty attitude.

Cats rule.

5. Over competitive

You’re not a cheater are you (see 4 above)? See what I did there? Wild cats? Cheater? Language joke. I is brainee innit.

6. Traveler. Lived in over 20 countries.

On the run?

7. is my lucky number.

Unscientific bollocks.

8. I left half of my heart somewhere in Covent Garden, London. The other half is in Barcelona

Try Transport for London lost property.

9. Old school gentleman, with a thing for courtesy.

I love courteous spitting.

10. Hopeless romantic. Thank you, Hollywood!

I love romantic face slapping.

One thing’s sure, you're gonna have to top that one way or another (or at least try to compete). I am Procrustes and this is my bed!

Ooooo. Pick me! Pick me! I know I’m not as good as her but I hope you’ll lower your high standards to consider me. I’m willing to compete. I have Tesco pants (high leg).

It’s understandable. You’ll, no doubt, be inundated.

13. Control freak, both in my day to day life and between the sheets.

You don’t say.

High self esteem - tick.

Willingness to compete for your affection with your fancy-pants goddess from point 11 - tick.

Oh wait...

15. Few things as a Dom: screaming turns me on a lottle (it's like a little, only a lot). If she doesn't scream, the pleasure or pain is not enough. And I will break you and make you scream!

As a Dom, you’ll need to check whether I want breaking. It does sound romantic though. Thanks Hollywood.

16. I like brats just a little more than subs. And I love to tease!

Are you teasing now?

17. Pet play doesn't do too much for me, but DDLG does.

FFS, after you said you loved dogs, I put on my Fido costume.

18. I like to watch shibari shows as much as the next guy, but I have no desire to master rope. Practicality dictates metal handcuffs.

I like cooking shows as much as the next guy but I have no desire to whip up a soufflé.

19. Sine qua non conditions: face slapping, choking, spanking, hair pulling, spitting, biting, in this order.

They have to be in that order? What if I want to be spat on, THEN slapped, THEN talked down to in Latin?

20. Forced play is my biggest fantasy.

I had a funny feeling it might be.

A great way to start negotiations for “forced play” is to list the things that WILL happen to the participant, prior to any discussions.

I don’t need your medical history.

22. My biggest weapon is my naughty smile. Comes with dimples.

Cute.

23. Passionate about entrepreneurship, startups in general and tech startups in particular.

Ok...

24. Dapper fat cat, with a thing for ties and bow ties. I am usually overdressed.

I’m fat too. We have something in common there.

25. Designer clothes, Ray Ban glasses and Red Bull are my guilty pleasures.

Next clothes, contact lenses, Diet Coke.

26. Sapiosexual and Grammar Nazi, in both English and a few other languages. Grammatik macht frei!

I see what you did there. You took the words from the gates of Auschwitz and made them into a grammar joke. Very sapiosexual.

Not a Scooby. Did you like Dirty Dancing?

Nope. But I love Homes Under the Hammer.

Are you hoping I’ll Google these quotes to prove I’m worthy?

30. If you wanna strike up a conversation about music, these are your hooks: Frank Sinatra, Jazz, the Stones and last but not least Irish folk. Can somebody explain to me The Mero?

Sigh.

P.S. Zazzy, sassy, bubbly, cocky, smart-assy, avant-garde intellectual. Mister "Always" Right Jr.

I’d agree that you’re at least one of those.

P.P.S. beard and thick frames.

Massive pubic hair and contact lenses. Please pick me. "

Best response so far.

I hope you get the "job".

Let us know how the interview goes.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best response so far.

I hope you get the "job".

Let us know how the interview goes....."

Absolutely!! It was even worth reading all that bollo again just to read Mrs Trellis’s responses ... she’s truly fabulous

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was exhausted from reading your 30 facts, then ventured to the profile.

I thought hubby was demanding expecting a blowie, and a bit of rough and tumble after a long day, upon reflection hes a breeze of fresh air. I think I married correctly.

So I guess this is a thanks for making me appreciate what I have and that I don't have to sift through a million demands to get a fuck each night

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