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How do you mend a broken heart

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Im looking for quick healing remides as i sick to death of feeling like crap.

Any laughtable suggestions much appricated.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A 42 man gangbang?

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By *aul1973HullMan
over a year ago

East Hull

Have you tried superglue?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Have you tried superglue? "

I’ll give that one ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sex drugs and rock n roll.

Or a wank an aspirin and a cry over some ballads.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

3 bottles of wiskey and a water gun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A cup of tea and a biscuit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont know but on the forums list when I saw this thread the next one was prostitutes so maybe that worth a try.....

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire


"A cup of tea and a biscuit "

Took the words right out of my mouth... oh & add in a rebound fling too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To get over one man its always best to get under another

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Have you tried superglue? "

Ask humpty dumpty didnt work out great for him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No such thing as a quick fix for this.

It would have to have been a genuine hurt to make it pain so much. You need to grieve for the loss before the sorrow gives away to the future - and the next good ride

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sex drugs and rock n roll.

"

We have a winner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Frequently post dog poo through his letterbox that will make you feel better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Willys.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I dont know but on the forums list when I saw this thread the next one was prostitutes so maybe that worth a try....."

I have hands!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"No such thing as a quick fix for this.

It would have to have been a genuine hurt to make it pain so much. You need to grieve for the loss before the sorrow gives away to the future - and the next good ride"

I know this but it’s shit, I want it gone now! But thanks for the kind words.x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Double sided sticky tape and a blue Peter presenter... those clever little fuckers can fix and make anything with that stuff

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By *entle giraffeMan
over a year ago

Minehead


"Im looking for quick healing remides as i sick to death of feeling like crap.

Any laughtable suggestions much appricated. "

A sprinkle of magic sparkle dust would do it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cake , good friends , alcohol (if you drink) and a good night out with your girlfriends.

Sending hugs x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I dont know but on the forums list when I saw this thread the next one was prostitutes so maybe that worth a try.....

I have hands! "

I honestly dont think people hire them for their hands

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By *agermeisterMan
over a year ago

Leeds

"How can you stop the rain from falling down?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""How can you stop the rain from falling down?""

Stop singing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tie the offending individual to a tree wearing just his underpants, cover him in honey (making sure to put your hand down his pants and spread loads on his goolies), then watch from a distance through binoculars as the ants crawl up his legs and the wasps swarm around his nipples.

XXX

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By *arnayguyMan
over a year ago

Durham Tees

Perform a 'been dumped tribute'. It's slightly like the photo tribute one may read about on here.

What's different is that having found a photo of your ex, preferably open mouthed, you place it face up on the surface of the water in your toilet. Having prepared yourself suitably for the day or so before, you will be ready for the 2nd movement of the performance. Now sit, relax and dump whatever you've got within, be that splashy depth charges or uncoiling a massive draught excluder of soft stool into Mr's gaping gob. This should be accompanied by you loudly singing 'I'm going to flush that man right out of my arse and send him on his way'.

Then it's just a swift wipe of your starfish, a quick turn of the cistern handle and hey presto! You've dumped the dumper and it's time to get out there and get you some.

Bon chance!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Cake , good friends , alcohol (if you drink) and a good night out with your girlfriends.

Sending hugs x "

Thank Hun. I night out is commmg. Hopefully I won’t feel so shit nothing worse for me than alcohol and being upset. This is the only time I truely avaoid drinking and I need a bloody drink!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Tie the offending individual to a tree wearing just his underpants, cover him in honey (making sure to put your hand down his pants and spread loads on his goolies), then watch from a distance through binoculars as the ants crawl up his legs and the wasps swarm around his nipples.

XXX"

Lol, I’m hurting I don’t hate him!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sex drugs and rock n roll.

Or a wank an aspirin and a cry over some ballads. "

Every one knows it's Sex and Drugs and Sausage rolls

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Perform a 'been dumped tribute'. It's slightly like the photo tribute one may read about on here.

What's different is that having found a photo of your ex, preferably open mouthed, you place it face up on the surface of the water in your toilet. Having prepared yourself suitably for the day or so before, you will be ready for the 2nd movement of the performance. Now sit, relax and dump whatever you've got within, be that splashy depth charges or uncoiling a massive draught excluder of soft stool into Mr's gaping gob. This should be accompanied by you loudly singing 'I'm going to flush that man right out of my arse and send him on his way'.

Then it's just a swift wipe of your starfish, a quick turn of the cistern handle and hey presto! You've dumped the dumper and it's time to get out there and get you some.

Bon chance! "

Euwwww lol

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By *orthyorkypairCouple
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

gorilla glue best i know of!!!! lol sticks owt!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have sex with lots of young men..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you find the answer let me know please....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To get over one man its always best to get under another"

Wise words.

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

I hear beans are good for your heart, but they come with side effects

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bit of Dolly Parton or Chaka Khan

Haagaan Daaaaz ice cream

12 pack of AA batteries for the mid wallow horn

Bottle of Gin/Vodka

CD of Saddest Lovesongs Ever

Mansize pack of Kleenex

Some Optrex for puffy eyes

The speedial number for your nearest Assassin

A good alibi

That, my sweet, is all you need x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A great new sex toy, some fabulous new lingerie and some time to try out both. Maybe a fab friend for phone sex too.

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By *eeBee67Man
over a year ago

Masked and Distant

Due to location of heart.

I would suggest extra strength "tit tape"

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By *orthyorkypairCouple
over a year ago

North Yorkshire


"I hear beans are good for your heart, but they come with side effects "

noooo silly thats fart!!!!!! lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Swimming ... or a great game of squash ...

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By *ookingforlustMan
over a year ago

northants

Gorilla glue

And buy a dog, or steal one.

Don’t get a cat, they just don’t give a fuck. They’re using little fuckers. They act like you’re their BFF till you feed them, then they fuck off.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Bit of Dolly Parton or Chaka Khan

Haagaan Daaaaz ice cream

12 pack of AA batteries for the mid wallow horn

Bottle of Gin/Vodka

CD of Saddest Lovesongs Ever

Mansize pack of Kleenex

Some Optrex for puffy eyes

The speedial number for your nearest Assassin

A good alibi

That, my sweet, is all you need x"

Mwah

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Gorilla glue

And buy a dog, or steal one.

Don’t get a cat, they just don’t give a fuck. They’re using little fuckers. They act like you’re their BFF till you feed them, then they fuck off. "

Don’t all spinster woman own cats?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best way to get over someone is to get under someone.

Thank me later

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The best way to get over someone is to get under someone.

Thank me later "

Hahahaha lover boy. If it was that simple for me I’d have done it already. I so wish my mind was able to work by that. Sadly my pathetic heart disagrees right now. Bridget Jones And DIY for me until the spell passes.

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By *FFB69Woman
over a year ago

Torfaen/Gwent

Rom coms. Alcohol of choice. Favourite food and junk food. And a good wank.

Or put a nail in his car tyres?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is no quick fix.... try ALL of the above but then it’s just time!!! Boring and as cliche as it sounds it really is!!!

And on those mega shit awful days when the pain is bloody horrendous just breathe and distract yourself go out and get fresh air... ring a friend whatever... Moan to all us here!!!

Hugs lovely it will get better xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go see the guy on Bricket Rd who can erase some of your memories.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Almonds dipped in virgin blood, the blood must be stirred not shaked

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By *ookingforlustMan
over a year ago

northants


"Gorilla glue

And buy a dog, or steal one.

Don’t get a cat, they just don’t give a fuck. They’re using little fuckers. They act like you’re their BFF till you feed them, then they fuck off.

Don’t all spinster woman own cats? "

Only the ones that smell of cat piss.......

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By *uzzbuzzCouple
over a year ago

guildford

Come to Swingles at Arousals on 12th May. Not to meet the next Mr Right but just to have fun x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks guys. All advice taken and greatfully received.

If I can’t An instant fix and can’t shag strangers for the hell of it I’ve found the next best thing.

I have an ex Don who I remained friends with over the year. He know my sub body inside out and he offered to sort out that half of my dilemma. The idea of no good sex it’s equally as painful as the broken heart. I’m 50% fines already

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