FabSwingers.com forum: Dating site recommendations

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So, lovely fabbers. I need to sort myself out and get serious about dating. I’d really like now to find someone with whom to create something special.

Obviously fab isn’t the place for this and I’d appreciate your recommendations for dating sites. Tinder doesn’t work for me. I can’t judge someone on a photo and I’m not photogenic. I *hate* POF with its sub-Tinder functionality and horrible glitches. It seems mainly full of fabbers. Guardian Soulmates is so up itself it’s untrue. I don’t have a ‘retreat’ in France or a favourite philosopher and I don’t really know my Kant from my c**t. So where would you recommend to find interesting people who *are* really interested in a significant relationship? I would consider ethical non-monogamy/non-exclusive but they’d have to be very special and I’d have to be primary.

Constructive suggestions welcome.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm going to watch this one with interest

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By *iss.RedWoman
over a year ago

somewhere

There seems to be a lot of the same people on all the sites. I was recommended bumble. Any matches you get the woman has to message first

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There seems to be a lot of the same people on all the sites. I was recommended bumble. Any matches you get the woman has to message first "

I tried Bumble a while ago. They were all impossibly beautiful and with perfect photos. Tbh I think they were fake profiles so I didn’t click/swipe on any of them. It may be more real now in Yorkshire.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m a fan of tinder ... if only coz that’s where I found miss G.

Bumble was more fun .. but relies on photos as much as Tinder.

Pof allows a bit more personality ... but you’re still looking for straw in a pile of needles. (More pricks in my metaphor!)

Tbh anything online is gonna be picture first, personality second.

So my recommendation is .... meetup. Find groups you like. See if this leads to people you like.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OK Cupid, although i find that there is a limited number of men within my search criteria in my location.

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By *ribsaMan
over a year ago

A box at end of your bed

Hi tigerli1y I am up for some real dating. Not a great dating profile on here but message me up and I can send some nice photo. Well I am not photogenic but will do my best. Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m a fan of tinder ... if only coz that’s where I found miss G.

Bumble was more fun .. but relies on photos as much as Tinder.

Pof allows a bit more personality ... but you’re still looking for straw in a pile of needles. (More pricks in my metaphor!)

Tbh anything online is gonna be picture first, personality second.

So my recommendation is .... meetup. Find groups you like. See if this leads to people you like. "

I'd have to agree with you on meetups as it seems the way forward to what looking for

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

Tinder found me what I wanted. I chose my profile text and photos carefully which I believe helped immensely.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My experience of dating sites is that they have quite a high proportion of fake profiles to draw in the subscriptions.

This might apply more to female profiles to give the impression of a more balanced male/female membership but it highlights the dishonesty of the site owners and left me sceptical.

I'd try the good old fashioned method of getting out and meeting people. Go to places where people share your interests, book a singles holiday ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve had this problem..

Tinder for me is just like a shag site.. zero success on there

POV - had a couple of dates but so far no good

Bumble - did like buy in hull no matches nearest was basically London.

Basically all the sites are photo led and superficial in that sense so as someone has said look but don’t be too serious about it and try and laugh at the ridiculousness of it all...and maybe you will finally find someone.. !

I’ve given up on dating at the moment as apparently to find someone who maybe just wants to go to the cinema.. have drinks.. laugh and talk is beyond expectations!!

So fab it is for the time being!

Good luck in your search! Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone once told me that most of the "sex" sites have the same data base of users on them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would say the paid ones are best. People tend to be more serious about dating!

Wishing you lots of luck in the world of dating!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m a fan of tinder ... if only coz that’s where I found miss G.

Bumble was more fun .. but relies on photos as much as Tinder.

Pof allows a bit more personality ... but you’re still looking for straw in a pile of needles. (More pricks in my metaphor!)

Tbh anything online is gonna be picture first, personality second.

So my recommendation is .... meetup. Find groups you like. See if this leads to people you like. "

I like this suggestion, and your prick references..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"OK Cupid, although i find that there is a limited number of men within my search criteria in my location."

I had some interesting convos on there. That’s going to be my first port of call.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dating and swinging i think is recipe for disaster .its one or the other in my opinion .Anyone else think this ?

Longer you swing its hard too date and have vanilla relationship .Tried and it ends in tears .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think Hinge is better for relationships than any other app to be honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dating and swinging i think is recipe for disaster .its one or the other in my opinion .Anyone else think this ?

Longer you swing its hard too date and have vanilla relationship .Tried and it ends in tears .

Yes I think it’s maybe one or the other.. I didn’t have any meets off here until I’d decided if I was done with dating for the time being... although I don’t meet couples so potentially I just need to find a single hot sexy gorgeous guy with a filthy side!!

How hard can that be!!!?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try Muddy matches, if youre the outdoor type. My mate used and fell in love with a girl on there.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think Hinge is better for relationships than any other app to be honest."

Ok. Will investigate. Never heard of it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dating and swinging i think is recipe for disaster .its one or the other in my opinion .Anyone else think this ?

Longer you swing its hard too date and have vanilla relationship .Tried and it ends in tears .

How hard can that be!!!?

Very hard

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Try Muddy matches, if youre the outdoor type. My mate used and fell in love with a girl on there."

Ooh thanks! I knew there was a climbing one, but not a general outdoors one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think Hinge is better for relationships than any other app to be honest.

Ok. Will investigate. Never heard of it."

You put up pics and short bio, you can like and leave a comment on a text of bio or the pic. It's not too bad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe try a gaming site, like pogo or and interest/hobby and join a forum website. You may get chatting to someone away from the sites that are predominantly penis brain led.

good luck on your quest.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dating and swinging i think is recipe for disaster .its one or the other in my opinion .Anyone else think this ?

Longer you swing its hard too date and have vanilla relationship .Tried and it ends in tears .

I’ve been on 18 months. That’s it then, I’m buggered...ruined for good vanilla men for ever..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dating and swinging i think is recipe for disaster .its one or the other in my opinion .Anyone else think this ?

Longer you swing its hard too date and have vanilla relationship .Tried and it ends in tears .

How hard can that be!!!?

Very hard

More like impossible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dating and swinging i think is recipe for disaster .its one or the other in my opinion .Anyone else think this ?

Longer you swing its hard too date and have vanilla relationship .Tried and it ends in tears .

I’ve been on 18 months. That’s it then, I’m buggered...ruined for good vanilla men for ever.."

Always crave something and end up looking when in vanilla relationship .unless hes great looking and great at sex

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dating and swinging i think is recipe for disaster .its one or the other in my opinion .Anyone else think this ?

Longer you swing its hard too date and have vanilla relationship .Tried and it ends in tears .

I’ve been on 18 months. That’s it then, I’m buggered...ruined for good vanilla men for ever..

Always crave something and end up looking when in vanilla relationship .unless hes great looking and great at sex

Yes. It’s a risk I’ve considered. How to deal with the transition from one to the other is the question..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’ve had this problem..

Tinder for me is just like a shag site.. zero success on there

POV - had a couple of dates but so far no good

Bumble - did like buy in hull no matches nearest was basically London.

I’ve given up on dating at the moment as apparently to find someone who maybe just wants to go to the cinema.. have drinks.. laugh and talk is beyond expectations!!

So fab it is for the time being!

Good luck in your search! Xx"

Thank you! Your experience sounds very much like mine. Those I know who have had success with online dating we’re doing it 6-10 years ago..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dating and swinging i think is recipe for disaster .its one or the other in my opinion .Anyone else think this ?

Longer you swing its hard too date and have vanilla relationship .Tried and it ends in tears .

I’ve been on 18 months. That’s it then, I’m buggered...ruined for good vanilla men for ever..

Always crave something and end up looking when in vanilla relationship .unless hes great looking and great at sex

Yes. It’s a risk I’ve considered. How to deal with the transition from one to the other is the question.."

Have to considerate on dating and forget swinging but easier said than done .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve good friends who met now husbands through tinder, e-harmony, my single friend and okcupid. Best conversations I’ve had have been on okcupid. Although actually, I’ve had more nearest misses from fab!

Although as everyone says, getting out and about into new circles of social groups is also important and doing it through shared interest activities makes sense.

Good luck (I’ll be trying again soon once I feel a bit more settled and ready).

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you everyone for your comments. You’ve reinforced my thought that real life socialising is the way to go, but I will be trying some of the new sites and apps I haven’t heard of before.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

I started at the top and worked my way down the food chain - I'm afraid I have none to recommend, and have had far more genuine friendships out of fab.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I started at the top and worked my way down the food chain - I'm afraid I have none to recommend, and have had far more genuine friendships out of fab.

Not a surprise tbh. And people on here are often so interesting too. We need a ‘swingers looking for long term swinging partners’ site. Swingder.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My own sense is that we fall in love with people who we come across on our journey through life. If we are on a journey, say we have a hobby or project or dream we are passionately pursuing, or we enjoy doing particular pursuits, then we are likely to meet more suitable people through that. If our lives have stalled somewhat, however, and we've turned into really rather boring sods, then we'll need to try and contrive meeting people... random people. And it's only then that any of the current crop of online dating solutions can help out... when it's already too late.

Having said that I'm a strong believer in fate. I think the chances of meeting someone who you fall in love with is so small that the universe meant it to be. Given this, all we can ever do is just get out and meet people and hope we get lucky. As such, online dating apps can be one way of doing that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best ones are some of the paid ones. If you are looking for free ones, they are a little more limited in actual dating. They tend to be hook up sites that parade as dating ones. There are some people on those sites that are the exception to the rule mind, just like on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take a plunge and try them all. Also match.com (i think) and eharmony pride themselves on long lasting relationships so start there first

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

"Dating and swinging i think is recipe for disaster .its one or the other in my opinion .Anyone else think this ?

Longer you swing its hard too date and have vanilla relationship .Tried and it ends in tears .

How hard can that be!!!?

Very hard

Very very hard

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I started at the top and worked my way down the food chain - I'm afraid I have none to recommend, and have had far more genuine friendships out of fab.

Not a surprise tbh. And people on here are often so interesting too. We need a ‘swingers looking for long term swinging partners’ site. Swingder. "

There was FabFlirts, I don't know if it's still around. It didn't work as it was the same people as here but peddling a different line to get a shag.

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