FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Perspectives

Jump to newest
 

By *ryst In Isolde OP   Woman
over a year ago

your imagination

I'm mainly looking for women's perspectives on this topic.

Let's say you're contacted via a text app by someone who's name you don't recognise. They say they had been in contact with you a long time ago but won't say who they are, if you've met, or where they had initially made contact with you through. They seem to find the situation funny and maybe a little cute... do you share their opinion? Or do you find it creepy and unsettling?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It would annoy me more than anything.

Just don't reply until they tell you who they are x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find this stuff childish and very creepy and just block or ignore them

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just annoying and childish and ends up with their number being blocked.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

I'd block them tbh

Sound like they enjoy messing with your head.

Miss

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It would annoy me, and creep me out to be honest

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I'd block. Mind games are not good.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would find it creepy

But then my mind would starting ticking and thinking maybe it could be a guy I’ve met who I thought wasn’t single and it’s his partner fishing

So I wound instantly block them

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would be mad. If he doesn't want to tell me who he is, why did he send a message? Just to have fun seeing how I'm trying to guess his identity? I would just ignore him after a few messages just to stay calm

Kitten

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From a man's perspective? It's creepy and unsettling, he should realise that, or maybe that's part of his game.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd find it funny.... To start with!

I'd play along for a while then I'd tell him if he didn't reveal his identity id block him.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Can see it might be "humourous" if it were a handful of messages in quick succession before a big reveal along the lines of "It's me XXXX did you not recognise my number?" and from someone you knew quite well but other than that I'm not sure there's any way of looking at it other than it being creepy and unsettling - particularly if it's carried on over a period of time.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm mainly looking for women's perspectives on this topic.

Let's say you're contacted via a text app by someone who's name you don't recognise. They say they had been in contact with you a long time ago but won't say who they are, if you've met, or where they had initially made contact with you through. They seem to find the situation funny and maybe a little cute... do you share their opinion? Or do you find it creepy and unsettling?"

Block!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d give them one go at coming clean about who they are. Then I’d turn off what’s app notifications and I gnore any further messages. They’d be bound to tell you then, as it’s no fun is it , if the other person isn’t replying.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From a woman’s perspective,....funny at first, not so much after a few messages.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iscean MaleMan
over a year ago

Darlaston

From a male of females perpective...it is childish.

Man up. Stop playing games would be my attitude towards the sender.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm mainly looking for women's perspectives on this topic.

Let's say you're contacted via a text app by someone who's name you don't recognise. They say they had been in contact with you a long time ago but won't say who they are, if you've met, or where they had initially made contact with you through. They seem to find the situation funny and maybe a little cute... do you share their opinion? Or do you find it creepy and unsettling?"

Id say creepy...especially if they won't tell you where they know you from..

That happened to me a few months back.. they wouldn't say where they knew me from so i just blocked the number

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ryst In Isolde OP   Woman
over a year ago

your imagination


"Can see it might be "humourous" if it were a handful of messages in quick succession before a big reveal along the lines of "It's me XXXX did you not recognise my number?" and from someone you knew quite well but other than that I'm not sure there's any way of looking at it other than it being creepy and unsettling - particularly if it's carried on over a period of time."

A quick reveal from a good friend I'd somehow lost touch with would be nice... I can see how that might be a pleasant surprise. But I've experienced this twice now, and its never been the case.

One guy got quite annoyed when I said I found it creepy, he took it as an insult and then blocked me lol.

I have a feeling these were guys who took my contact info from group chats that were set up prior to events in the past, and probably never spoke to directly.

I just wondered if I was being oversensitive in finding someone's refusal to say who they were or how they happened to have your contact info creepy.

They may or may not be on Fab. I've no idea unless anyone tells me otherwise, but just thought that guys who do this kind of thing and think its funny might think twice if they were to see how women perceive this kind of stealth messaging.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very creepy x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would tell them I have no idea who you are and goodbye.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ryst In Isolde OP   Woman
over a year ago

your imagination


"From a woman’s perspective,....funny at first, not so much after a few messages. "

Good to see you're in touch with your feminine side

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

totally weird and would freak me out because I would wonder where he got my number from

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depending o the tone Id think they were either

hitting the Chardonnay too hard and d*unkenly thought it was hilarious,

are a former trivial contact who now wants to revive something and has way overestimated their impact on your consciousness or, and in my opinion most likely,

The suspicious partner of a former contact clumsily trying to get you to reveal who you are and the nature of the contact.

I’d kill it off swiftly.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

I would tell them to sling their hook.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Block!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Id just ignore

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

It’s happened to me and I wasn’t remotely amused. They were given one message to identify themselves then block

Very very creepy

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilthyStrumpetCouple
over a year ago

Trowbridge

Get this on kik a lot!

Creepy...I block.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Creepy. I wouldn't block cos I'm nosy but I would tell them I won't be replying unless they identify themselves. I can be quite stubborn too.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d put their number into google, Facebook and WhatsApp searches and 99% of the time you’ll find out exactly who they are.

^ and that’s why our numbers aren’t given out on here

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ryst In Isolde OP   Woman
over a year ago

your imagination

I don't give out my phone number either. I can actually count the number of people from the swinging world whom I'm close enough to and trust enough to give my number to on one hand. This happened via kik, which is an app I've used intermittently for over 5 years as an alternative to giving out my phone number, and aside from participating in the occasional pre-event kik group, I'm almost as precious these days about giving my kik address to anyone as my phone number.

Thanks to everyone who gave their perspectives. Hopefully they might have the desired effect and make guys (or girls if they do it too!) realise just how creepy stealth texting can be.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I definitely would play with that person...

Telling all sort of fantastic story abt my cousin Peter, the friend of my brother Paul who lost one of his leg in a roundabout

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Creepy

Block!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Annoying and creepy.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm mainly looking for women's perspectives on this topic.

Let's say you're contacted via a text app by someone who's name you don't recognise. They say they had been in contact with you a long time ago but won't say who they are, if you've met, or where they had initially made contact with you through. They seem to find the situation funny and maybe a little cute... do you share their opinion? Or do you find it creepy and unsettling?"

I've had this twice on WhatsApp

I asked them who they were and how they knew me. They didn't tell me. I got bored and said well I don't know you so just delete me x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had something similar recently on fb which wasn't great. I just declined the message.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliciousladyWoman
over a year ago

Sometimes U.K

I wouldn’t enter into conversation with them.

Instant delete and block

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

If they didnt tell me how they knew me in the first couple of messages I'd ignore them. Possibly block.

I don't give out my mo no anymore as I got a disturbing message how you describe. However a quick Google and a trail to fb and I found out who it was....someone is met for a social 2 years prior!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top