FabSwingers.com forum: Make me laugh

By *appyhumper123 OP Man
over a year ago

hull

Last night my wife turned and said if you turn the light off I let you stick it up my arse, i probably should have let the bulb cool down first tho

What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer, the hooker can wash her crack and resell it

Is it wrong to intentionally go into a midget bar and ask for a top shelf drink

My gf whispers I want you to make me scream using your fingers so I poked her in the eye super hard

What's the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer

The taste

What is it with women & periods, everything is you fault when she's having one & when she's not it's still your fault

What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is at all times,

A widow

What Gordon Ramsay's favourite film

It's £uckin frozen

No man's land would be a great name for a lesbian bar

When I get a call from a unknown number I answer, it's done but there's blood everywhere

I got kicked out of the local swimming pool today, apparently the breast stroke isn't what I thought it was

My friend asked what rhymes what orange I said no it doesn't

I asked the shop assistant I ordered a book about small penises she said it wasn't in yet I said that's the one

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Psychiatrist's Diagnosis

A woman went to a psychiatrist because she was having severe problems with her sex life. The psychiatrist asked her many questions but did not seem to be getting a clear picture of her problems. Finally he asked, "Do you ever watch your husband's face while you are having sex?"

"Well, yes, I did once."

"And how did he look?"

"Very angry."

At this point the psychiatrist felt that he was really getting somewhere and he said, "Well that's very interesting, we must look into this further. Now tell me, you say that you have only seen your husband's face once during sex; that seems somewhat unusual. How did it occur that you saw his face that one time?"

"He was looking through the window at us."

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By *traight up guyMan
over a year ago

Morpeth

Q: What's E.T. short for?

A: Cos he's got little legs.

A Kiwi (NZ) farmer is walking down a lane with 2 sheep. His mate sees him and says. 'Hi mate. Are you shearing?' The farmer replies ' No mate, I'm going to fuck them both myself!'

Q: Why is Toblerone triangular?

A: So it fits in the box.