FabSwingers.com forum: Transgender day of visibility

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I know a fair few people who are trans/non binary and I'm super conscious of getting people's preferred pronouns right.

What are yours?

He/his? She/hers? They/theirs? Something else?

I identify as female, she, her.

(Not asking for opinions on trans/non binary people. Simply asking how you identify/wish to be approached)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know a fair few people who are trans/non binary and I'm super conscious of getting people's preferred pronouns right.

What are yours?

He/his? She/hers? They/theirs? Something else?

I identify as female, she, her.

(Not asking for opinions on trans/non binary people. Simply asking how you identify/wish to be approached)"

I've said before,and I'll say it again,that I am perfectly willing to call anyone whatever they want to be called but,it does 'P' me off when I am expected to just know and I am rebuked for guessing wrong. e.g. I was recently scolded by a person who had just told me they were transitioning from female to male. I said 'he' and was treated to a mouthful of abuse for not saying 'they'. I don't identify as a mindreader,ffs.

In most cases,it's just obvious which pronouns to use.Anyone who may be aware that their preferred pronouns are slightly unorthodox could at least give everyone else a clue.

More upsetting to some trans people,I believe,are other everyday terms which can be interpreted as being gender specific,such as 'mate' 'darling' 'pal' 'love'.

I would urge anyone who gets upset by the 'incorrect' use of any of those terms to realise that, if that is all they have to worry about,then they don't have much to worry about.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Him his MD or Mistress

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I know a fair few people who are trans/non binary and I'm super conscious of getting people's preferred pronouns right.

What are yours?

He/his? She/hers? They/theirs? Something else?

I identify as female, she, her.

(Not asking for opinions on trans/non binary people. Simply asking how you identify/wish to be approached)

In most cases,it's just obvious which pronouns to use.Anyone who may be aware that their preferred pronouns are slightly unorthodox could at least give everyone else a clue.

More upsetting to some trans people,I believe,are other everyday terms which can be interpreted as being gender specific,such as 'mate' 'darling' 'pal' 'love'.

I would urge anyone who gets upset by the 'incorrect' use of any of those terms to realise that, if that is all they have to worry about,then they don't have much to worry about."

Couldn't have worded it better!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

Maybe ask each individual which pronoun they prefer, since everyone is different.

I'm sure that your effort will be appreciated x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not bothered what you call me as long as its polite, mate usually works well.

I've been into a few bars fully dressed and people just talk to you normally and that's all you can really ask.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

If someone looks conventionally male I will use he and female she. If they ask me to use something different I would do that.

Given that 99% of people, if you asked them pronoun you should use would either look at you like you were crazy or say "what's a pronoun", I don't intend to routinely start doing that.

Obviously, if you were in some sort of environment where everyone was Trans conscious then you might, but for everyday life, no.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Trans fantasy but still male

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

I will call you by anything you want respectfully.

Just bare with me as my memory is often shit and it may take a while. I reserve the right to be human.

Irrespective of my personal feelings on the matter it costs nothing to respect a pronoun no matter how weird it may appear at first.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I will call you by anything you want respectfully.

Just bare with me as my memory is often shit and it may take a while. I reserve the right to be human.

Irrespective of my personal feelings on the matter it costs nothing to respect a pronoun no matter how weird it may appear at first. "

Your OK I'm far from spitting my dummy out if I don't get the preferred pronoun

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

"I will call you by anything you want respectfully.

Just bare with me as my memory is often shit and it may take a while. I reserve the right to be human.

Irrespective of my personal feelings on the matter it costs nothing to respect a pronoun no matter how weird it may appear at first.

Your OK I'm far from spitting my dummy out if I don't get the preferred pronoun

I once got a huge ear bashing for not calling someone “postmaster” true story.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I will call you by anything you want respectfully.

Just bare with me as my memory is often shit and it may take a while. I reserve the right to be human.

Irrespective of my personal feelings on the matter it costs nothing to respect a pronoun no matter how weird it may appear at first.

Your OK I'm far from spitting my dummy out if I don't get the preferred pronoun

I once got a huge ear bashing for not calling someone “postmaster” true story. "

I bet it was a woman

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am looking to go to a TV and admirers event in the near future.

As I enter I will say," good afternoon ladies and gentlmen" and then refer thereafter to their individual names they give to me.

This is because each individual a person and not a label.

I'm not dissing the subject or OP here. It is just how I think I should be talking to another human.

Mistress Amelia x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

In here I prefer slim !! In real life I couldn't care less . I've been called many things, Not always pleasant

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know a fair few people who are trans/non binary and I'm super conscious of getting people's preferred pronouns right.

What are yours?

He/his? She/hers? They/theirs? Something else?

I identify as female, she, her.

(Not asking for opinions on trans/non binary people. Simply asking how you identify/wish to be approached)"
I'm very confused so Is the female in this couple actually trans? Excuse my ignorence and I certainly don't meen to offend any one

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know a fair few people who are trans/non binary and I'm super conscious of getting people's preferred pronouns right.

What are yours?

He/his? She/hers? They/theirs? Something else?

I identify as female, she, her.

(Not asking for opinions on trans/non binary people. Simply asking how you identify/wish to be approached) I'm very confused so Is the female in this couple actually trans? Excuse my ignorence and I certainly don't meen to offend any one "

There's nothing wrong with asking questions but, you should be aware that the most common answer to that particular question is, 'none of your damn business'.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I know a fair few people who are trans/non binary and I'm super conscious of getting people's preferred pronouns right.

What are yours?

He/his? She/hers? They/theirs? Something else?

I identify as female, she, her.

(Not asking for opinions on trans/non binary people. Simply asking how you identify/wish to be approached)

In most cases,it's just obvious which pronouns to use.Anyone who may be aware that their preferred pronouns are slightly unorthodox could at least give everyone else a clue.

More upsetting to some trans people,I believe,are other everyday terms which can be interpreted as being gender specific,such as 'mate' 'darling' 'pal' 'love'.

I would urge anyone who gets upset by the 'incorrect' use of any of those terms to realise that, if that is all they have to worry about,then they don't have much to worry about."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Comrad!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I am looking to go to a TV and admirers event in the near future.

As I enter I will say," good afternoon ladies and gentlmen" and then refer thereafter to their individual names they give to me.

This is because each individual a person and not a label.

I'm not dissing the subject or OP here. It is just how I think I should be talking to another human.

Mistress Amelia x "

Names...... there's a novelty

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know a fair few people who are trans/non binary and I'm super conscious of getting people's preferred pronouns right.

What are yours?

He/his? She/hers? They/theirs? Something else?

I identify as female, she, her.

(Not asking for opinions on trans/non binary people. Simply asking how you identify/wish to be approached)

In most cases,it's just obvious which pronouns to use.Anyone who may be aware that their preferred pronouns are slightly unorthodox could at least give everyone else a clue.

More upsetting to some trans people,I believe,are other everyday terms which can be interpreted as being gender specific,such as 'mate' 'darling' 'pal' 'love'.

I would urge anyone who gets upset by the 'incorrect' use of any of those terms to realise that, if that is all they have to worry about,then they don't have much to worry about."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

All my life I have only had to make a choice between HE or SHE.

Identification was pretty simple.

Short hair, whiskers or moustache with deep voice, wears shirt and trousers= HIM.

Long hair , smooth skin, squeaky voice , wears a dress = HER

Now that we have to be corrected every time we get it wrong ( and long may people educate others ) would all those objecting to being addressed incorrectly please wear a label.

This goes for any uppity couples in here or the Royal Family who prefer to talk about what 'we' do all the time even when only one of them is speaking.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am looking to go to a TV and admirers event in the near future.

As I enter I will say," good afternoon ladies and gentlmen" and then refer thereafter to their individual names they give to me.

This is because each individual a person and not a label.

I'm not dissing the subject or OP here. It is just how I think I should be talking to another human.

Mistress Amelia x

Names...... there's a novelty"

Isn't it just

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

just be yourself and use what common sense terminology you deem proper, if Trans get abusive just move on, they are not for you, theres plenty of us down to earth Trans that will happily accomodate you guys..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Can I keep I. Or do I have to keep saying ..... Granny wants a biscuit ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

I struggle with referring to one person as 'they'. This is just my English language mindset. 'They' is a plural, so to use it to refer to one is quite alien to me.

I do a lot of work within the Lgbt community of my Union, and always explain that I'll try my best, but sometimes I get it wrong.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I think it does a lot to diminish the richness of language and communication.

It'd take some time for me to get used to they....... but i'd do it.

Then i'm going to start on age issues. Mwah hahahahahahaha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it's not too late and please forgive my ignorance but what's a binary person?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Well that didn't go to plan

I'm a cis female. Born female, raised female and identify as such. And as a couple, we don't seek out trans people to play with. (Not that we wouldn't if we were attracted to them)

Simply picking up on what non binary friends of mine have said, which is that they'd prefer people to ask and address them as they identify. That's all this was about.

It's certainly not about labelling people, for someone who identifies as female/male or non binary to be addressed by the opposite pronouns can have quite the effect on them.

I simply wouldn't want to offend and of you in that way. No malice or hidden meaning there and it's not something that effects me personally.

Thanks for all your responses.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London

I would urge anyone who gets upset by the 'incorrect' use of any of those terms to realise that, if that is all they have to worry about,then they don't have much to worry about."

Well, I think the point is that it probably isn't all they have to worry about.

If someone is genuinely upset by being referred to by the wrong name or gender, then they're probably struggling in more ways than just that.

Being trans is often not easy to put it mildly (from what I understand and what stats on violence suggest).

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If it's not too late and please forgive my ignorance but what's a binary person?

Someone who is non binary doesn't identify as either male or female.

Their appearance may have zero to do with this.

I know a great couple, both of whom are non binary, the biological male, looks like a man, most people would use "he" based on how he looks, he prefers "she/they" and his partner looks very feminine and is a biological woman, also prefers "they".

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I would urge anyone who gets upset by the 'incorrect' use of any of those terms to realise that, if that is all they have to worry about,then they don't have much to worry about.

Well, I think the point is that it probably isn't all they have to worry about.

If someone is genuinely upset by being referred to by the wrong name or gender, then they're probably struggling in more ways than just that.

Being trans is often not easy to put it mildly (from what I understand and what stats on violence suggest)."

I totally agree!

I'm all about equality and acceptance. If addressing someone by their preferred pronoun makes life a little easier for them, of course I'll do that! Whether I understand their reasons or not.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I call everyone oi.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Non-binary

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"If it's not too late and please forgive my ignorance but what's a binary person?

Someone who is non binary doesn't identify as either male or female.

Their appearance may have zero to do with this.

Then they have a responsibility to say to people as they are introduce. Hi, I'm Peter. I identify as they/she and want you to call me Peter or they or she as you speak about me or to me. This is my parter Allison he is female and likes to be referred to as they/he. So please bear this in mind during your conversations about them during the evening.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Sorry ....... that should have been to 'I' or about 'I' ....... I feel embarassed now

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If it's not too late and please forgive my ignorance but what's a binary person?

Someone who is non binary doesn't identify as either male or female.

Their appearance may have zero to do with this.

That's fair...and they do. But if i know someone who clearly isn't gender confirming and I'm not aware of their preferences, I will ask them. I don't ask everyone I meet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If it's not too late and please forgive my ignorance but what's a binary person?

Someone who is non binary doesn't identify as either male or female.

Their appearance may have zero to do with this.

Okay, thanks for that, don't understand it but each to their own.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey, can you give this drink to they over there in the green top.

Them? It? Thingy?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My gay friends call everyone sausage.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *abrielle247Couple (FF)
over a year ago

PDI Gran Canaria

I like to be addressed as her,she, miss, darling. I don't mind really, call me what you like as long as you call me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No matter what term/terms you use in this day and age, typically atleast one person will suggest they feel offended OP.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No matter what term/terms you use in this day and age, typically atleast one person will suggest they feel offended OP. "

Probably, doesn't hurt to make the effort how does it?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well that didn't go to plan

I'm a cis female. Born female, raised female and identify as such. And as a couple, we don't seek out trans people to play with. (Not that we wouldn't if we were attracted to them)

Simply picking up on what non binary friends of mine have said, which is that they'd prefer people to ask and address them as they identify. That's all this was about.

It's certainly not about labelling people, for someone who identifies as female/male or non binary to be addressed by the opposite pronouns can have quite the effect on them.

I simply wouldn't want to offend and of you in that way. No malice or hidden meaning there and it's not something that effects me personally.

Thanks for all your responses.

So do we now have to identify as CIS male or female? Isn't male or female good enough anymore??

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Well that didn't go to plan

I'm a cis female. Born female, raised female and identify as such. And as a couple, we don't seek out trans people to play with. (Not that we wouldn't if we were attracted to them)

Simply picking up on what non binary friends of mine have said, which is that they'd prefer people to ask and address them as they identify. That's all this was about.

It's certainly not about labelling people, for someone who identifies as female/male or non binary to be addressed by the opposite pronouns can have quite the effect on them.

I simply wouldn't want to offend and of you in that way. No malice or hidden meaning there and it's not something that effects me personally.

Thanks for all your responses.

So do we now have to identify as CIS male or female? Isn't male or female good enough anymore??"

However you want to identify is fine by me! That's the point of this....

Does it offend you when someone puts "cis" ahead of male/female?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/04/18 14:29:09]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well that didn't go to plan

I'm a cis female. Born female, raised female and identify as such. And as a couple, we don't seek out trans people to play with. (Not that we wouldn't if we were attracted to them)

Simply picking up on what non binary friends of mine have said, which is that they'd prefer people to ask and address them as they identify. That's all this was about.

It's certainly not about labelling people, for someone who identifies as female/male or non binary to be addressed by the opposite pronouns can have quite the effect on them.

I simply wouldn't want to offend and of you in that way. No malice or hidden meaning there and it's not something that effects me personally.

Thanks for all your responses.

So do we now have to identify as CIS male or female? Isn't male or female good enough anymore??

However you want to identify is fine by me! That's the point of this....

Does it offend you when someone puts "cis" ahead of male/female?"

Offended, no. Just wonder why you need to.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Well that didn't go to plan

I'm a cis female. Born female, raised female and identify as such. And as a couple, we don't seek out trans people to play with. (Not that we wouldn't if we were attracted to them)

Simply picking up on what non binary friends of mine have said, which is that they'd prefer people to ask and address them as they identify. That's all this was about.

It's certainly not about labelling people, for someone who identifies as female/male or non binary to be addressed by the opposite pronouns can have quite the effect on them.

I simply wouldn't want to offend and of you in that way. No malice or hidden meaning there and it's not something that effects me personally.

Thanks for all your responses.

So do we now have to identify as CIS male or female? Isn't male or female good enough anymore??

However you want to identify is fine by me! That's the point of this....

Does it offend you when someone puts "cis" ahead of male/female?

Offended, no. Just wonder why you need to."

I don't need to, and generally don't. In the context of this thread tho it seemed appropriate. If it doesn't offend you, why worry?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No matter what term/terms you use in this day and age, typically atleast one person will suggest they feel offended OP.

Probably, doesn't hurt to make the effort how does it?"

There are only 2 sexes, and according to the dreaded facebook 71 different gender identities, law of averages suggests picking the correct term everytime just from the 71 specified by facebook is pretty much zero..

Yes it probably doesnt hurt to make the effort, but when the effort is a minefield itself what hope have you got..?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No matter what term/terms you use in this day and age, typically atleast one person will suggest they feel offended OP.

Probably, doesn't hurt to make the effort how does it?

Yes it probably doesnt hurt to make the effort, but when the effort is a minefield itself what hope have you got..?"

I'm happy to do something small like use a preferred pronoun if it makes someone more comfortable myself

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If it's not too late and please forgive my ignorance but what's a binary person?

Someone who is non binary doesn't identify as either male or female.

Their appearance may have zero to do with this.

Sorry but I think it's just a piss take. They just want attention. The world is going just a little bit crazy with trying not to offend people all the time. This is too far.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well that didn't go to plan

I'm a cis female. Born female, raised female and identify as such. And as a couple, we don't seek out trans people to play with. (Not that we wouldn't if we were attracted to them)

Simply picking up on what non binary friends of mine have said, which is that they'd prefer people to ask and address them as they identify. That's all this was about.

It's certainly not about labelling people, for someone who identifies as female/male or non binary to be addressed by the opposite pronouns can have quite the effect on them.

I simply wouldn't want to offend and of you in that way. No malice or hidden meaning there and it's not something that effects me personally.

Thanks for all your responses.

So do we now have to identify as CIS male or female? Isn't male or female good enough anymore??

However you want to identify is fine by me! That's the point of this....

Does it offend you when someone puts "cis" ahead of male/female?

Offended, no. Just wonder why you need to.

I don't need to, and generally don't. In the context of this thread tho it seemed appropriate. If it doesn't offend you, why worry?

No worried, having my say, it's allowed you know!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Well that didn't go to plan

I'm a cis female. Born female, raised female and identify as such. And as a couple, we don't seek out trans people to play with. (Not that we wouldn't if we were attracted to them)

Simply picking up on what non binary friends of mine have said, which is that they'd prefer people to ask and address them as they identify. That's all this was about.

It's certainly not about labelling people, for someone who identifies as female/male or non binary to be addressed by the opposite pronouns can have quite the effect on them.

I simply wouldn't want to offend and of you in that way. No malice or hidden meaning there and it's not something that effects me personally.

Thanks for all your responses.

So do we now have to identify as CIS male or female? Isn't male or female good enough anymore??

However you want to identify is fine by me! That's the point of this....

Does it offend you when someone puts "cis" ahead of male/female?

Offended, no. Just wonder why you need to.

I don't need to, and generally don't. In the context of this thread tho it seemed appropriate. If it doesn't offend you, why worry?

No worried, having my say, it's allowed you know!!"

Not suggesting otherwise

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If it's not too late and please forgive my ignorance but what's a binary person?

Someone who is non binary doesn't identify as either male or female.

Their appearance may have zero to do with this.

Sorry but I think it's just a piss take. They just want attention. The world is going just a little bit crazy with trying not to offend people all the time. This is too far."

To clarify, I mean it's a piss take when people get irate when someone doesn't address them the way they want, if there are no 'clues'.

If someone asks me to address them a certain way then I'm fine with that and I'll respect it. Although I'm crap with remembering names so I may make a mistake.

I can of course understand they'd be pissed off if someone was deliberately calling them the wrong thing.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If it's not too late and please forgive my ignorance but what's a binary person?

Someone who is non binary doesn't identify as either male or female.

Their appearance may have zero to do with this.

Sorry but I think it's just a piss take. They just want attention. The world is going just a little bit crazy with trying not to offend people all the time. This is too far.

To clarify, I mean it's a piss take when people get irate when someone doesn't address them the way they want, if there are no 'clues'.

If someone asks me to address them a certain way then I'm fine with that and I'll respect it. Although I'm crap with remembering names so I may make a mistake.

I can of course understand they'd be pissed off if someone was deliberately calling them the wrong thing."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"No matter what term/terms you use in this day and age, typically atleast one person will suggest they feel offended OP.

Probably, doesn't hurt to make the effort how does it?"

As long as they've told me beforehand i'll make the effort. I'm not prepared to be lectured if I get it wrong.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No matter what term/terms you use in this day and age, typically atleast one person will suggest they feel offended OP.

Probably, doesn't hurt to make the effort how does it?

As long as they've told me beforehand i'll make the effort. I'm not prepared to be lectured if I get it wrong. "

That's fair enough

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I struggle with referring to one person as 'they'. This is just my English language mindset. 'They' is a plural, so to use it to refer to one is quite alien to me.

I do a lot of work within the Lgbt community of my Union, and always explain that I'll try my best, but sometimes I get it wrong. "

'Someone has just dumped a mattress in the street.I wish they hadn't done that.'

'Someone keeps parking their van across my gateway'.

Someone rescued a child from a fast flowing river,that was a heroic and selfless thing that they did'.

the singular 'they' has been a part of our language for a long time and,possibly,you use it more than you realise.

You could argue that it is mostly used in reference to someone that you can't identify but,maybe that makes it a correct usage when referring to someone of indeterminate gender.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London

"If it's not too late and please forgive my ignorance but what's a binary person?

Someone who is non binary doesn't identify as either male or female.

Their appearance may have zero to do with this.

Sorry but I think it's just a piss take. They just want attention. The world is going just a little bit crazy with trying not to offend people all the time. This is too far."

How can you possibly know they are doing it for attention when you don't know anything about this couple?

People live all kinds of different lives and have feelings that don't match my or your lives. Respecting that is not going 'too far'.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well that didn't go to plan

I'm a cis female. Born female, raised female and identify as such. And as a couple, we don't seek out trans people to play with. (Not that we wouldn't if we were attracted to them)

Simply picking up on what non binary friends of mine have said, which is that they'd prefer people to ask and address them as they identify. That's all this was about.

It's certainly not about labelling people, for someone who identifies as female/male or non binary to be addressed by the opposite pronouns can have quite the effect on them.

I simply wouldn't want to offend and of you in that way. No malice or hidden meaning there and it's not something that effects me personally.

Thanks for all your responses.

So a cis female is just a female why does it need complicating or am I missing something.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Well that didn't go to plan

I'm a cis female. Born female, raised female and identify as such. And as a couple, we don't seek out trans people to play with. (Not that we wouldn't if we were attracted to them)

Simply picking up on what non binary friends of mine have said, which is that they'd prefer people to ask and address them as they identify. That's all this was about.

It's certainly not about labelling people, for someone who identifies as female/male or non binary to be addressed by the opposite pronouns can have quite the effect on them.

I simply wouldn't want to offend and of you in that way. No malice or hidden meaning there and it's not something that effects me personally.

Thanks for all your responses.

So a cis female is just a female why does it need complicating or am I missing something."

Many people who weren't born biologically female identify so female...cis just means born with female parts

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its just confusion and those that desire these multitude of pseudo labels need to learn to respect the majorities outlooks, those that get offended have the problem, not those whom use the two plain common sense terms...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread