FabSwingers.com forum: Arrogance

By *ilkmanxxx OP Man
over a year ago

Sin City

Hi my fellow naughties

I know this lifestyle gives a huge amount of “confidence, feel good factor, boost ego’s” etc to couples and ladies due to the amount of wanted or unwanted attention but surely that’s no excuse for rudeness and arrogance which I’m definitely seeing a rise in.

Have I missed something to why this is??

Is this a 2018 thing??

Is it because certain ladies/couples have golden vagina’s that I don’t know about??

Am I that unattractive they think how dare I try a communicate with them??

I’m just struggling to figure it out please help lol

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Arrogance in what way ???

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By *ilkmanxxx OP Man
over a year ago

Sin City

The replies/none replies/ rude replies

Demands/ the way they message by completely ignoring your profile but demand you read there’s etc

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

I don't know if you're approaching people who are looking for you or what your initial message is like. Are you getting replies or ignored?

If it's the latter I can imagine why. Most read the profile before the message...I'll leave it there.

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By *ilkmanxxx OP Man
over a year ago

Sin City

"I don't know if you're approaching people who are looking for you or what your initial message is like. Are you getting replies or ignored?

If it's the latter I can imagine why. Most read the profile before the message...I'll leave it there."

Thanks for posting

Are you saying my profile warrants me to be ignored?

Do you think my profile comes across in a certain way?

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I don't know if you're approaching people who are looking for you or what your initial message is like. Are you getting replies or ignored?

If it's the latter I can imagine why. Most read the profile before the message...I'll leave it there.

Thanks for posting

Are you saying my profile warrants me to be ignored?

Do you think my profile comes across in a certain way?"

For me personally: on a single man's profile I want to see him. I also don't want someone who indulges in "risky" sex. You've not specified what risky is so I've made my own assumptions; I could be waay off base, but that's my first impression.

The SHOUTY intro is off putting to me too.

People are looking for "like minded" playmates which may not include you: none of us has universal appeal! Recognising that, and the fact there are thousands of fit as fuck single men to compete against may put things in perspective.

At the end of the day like will attract like and my opinion is just that: my opinion.

Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi my fellow naughties

Have I missed something to why this is??

Is this a 2018 thing??

Is it because certain ladies/couples have golden vagina’s that I don’t know about??

Am I that unattractive they think how dare I try a communicate with them??

I’m just struggling to figure it out please help lol

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By *ldhillhotwifeCouple
over a year ago

Old Hill

Sellers market... Our vaginas aren't golden but they are a rare commodity in high demand.

Not replying isn't being rude its the only way to operate on here when dealing with unsolicited messages asking if we want to "pop round for a fuck".

Soz

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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago

Slough Windsor ish

"I don't know if you're approaching people who are looking for you or what your initial message is like. Are you getting replies or ignored?

If it's the latter I can imagine why. Most read the profile before the message...I'll leave it there.

Thanks for posting

Are you saying my profile warrants me to be ignored?

Do you think my profile comes across in a certain way?"

We reply to every message but for us apart from the shouty bit and the reference to risy sex, its your pics that would make us 'thanks but no thanks'.

Im sure some people do come across as arrogant but on the whole most are completely charming. Unfortunately perhaps they are the ones not replying, as per the sites guidance.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

When will men stop moaning on here and stop blaming the women for being rude or so far up their own bottoms that they can't find their way back down to meet you.

If you don't get a reply from someone there's a huge clue there...they don’t want to meet it's as simple as that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a site we join for our our own indulgence.

The minute we're feeling obliged,pressured or awkward, we've started being members for others indulgence.

Just use the site as you wish to and let all the others do vice versa. Somewhere along the way you'll find likeminded folk and ignore the vexations along the way.

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By *ammers43Man
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

Include SOME single men in your arrogance comnent,not just couples or single women, arrogance in a way that a single guy will still send a message asking for a meet when he remotely does not fit with a written profile but he thinks he knows better and still trys to convince that he is what you are looking for.Had this several times when i was on here before as part of a couple, please dont mistake arrogance with people knowing what they want, nothing arraogant about that plus not recieving a reply isnt arrogant, you chose to send a message you wasnt asked to send one ( this isnt aimed at you op im just generalizing)

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Include SOME single men in your arrogance comnent,not just couples or single women, arrogance in a way that a single guy will still send a message asking for a meet when he remotely does not fit with a written profile but he thinks he knows better and still trys to convince that he is what you are looking for.Had this several times when i was on here before as part of a couple, please dont mistake arrogance with people knowing what they want, nothing arraogant about that plus not recieving a reply isnt arrogant, you chose to send a message you wasnt asked to send one ( this isnt aimed at you op im just generalizing)

Yep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some probably are arrogant, but I’m sure there are men and couples who are too. Just move on and no reply just means not interested, not that there is something wrong with you. A thick skin is needed here at times.

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

OP..just a few thoughts...

- no-one is obliged to read or reply to messages here, as per site rules. How many of us would reply 'no thank you' to the unsolicited junk-mail that arrives through our letterbox?

- as you have not asked for profile advice, I cannot offer any. However, you might want to examine your expectations and motivations. Swinging is as much about the social side as having sex. Desperation to get laid rarely pays off here.

These words are kindly meant. Good luck.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

It's arrogant expecting a reply.

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By *acktar74Man
over a year ago

leeds

Just accept some will reply some won't everyone has busy lives and there own needs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can't reply to every single message ....so just move on its easier

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If anyone rudely replies with abuse report them.

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By *acktar74Man
over a year ago

leeds

"You can't reply to every single message ....so just move on its easier "

Well said. I suppose if they like you they will reply

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You wouldn't want to meet rude and arrogant people would you? They have done you a favour.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not rude to not reply. Personally I would not meet you because you are looking for rough/risky sex and I would feel unsafe not knowing exactly what that was, so maybe you could alter to specify. From a personal point of view i am not keen on pics of other females on a man's profile. I want to only see the man as it is he I would be meeting.x

As for rude replies, a lot of members get them, from both sexes and couples. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The replies/none replies/ rude replies

Demands/ the way they message by completely ignoring your profile but demand you read there’s etc"

I see double standards are afoot

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Look at it another way OP - you've not replied to each and every post on this thread (posts which are effectively messages to you in response to your post)...

....is that rude and arrogant behaviour on your part? No, thought not - so where's the difference?

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By *ammers43Man
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

"Look at it another way OP - you've not replied to each and every post on this thread (posts which are effectively messages to you in response to your post)...

....is that rude and arrogant behaviour on your part? No, thought not - so where's the difference?

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Yeah no replies to our comments...

Arrogance and rudeness is NOT the new sexy. Tut tut

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

I think all of must come across people whose communication skills trip the gut instinct.

They create an impression of an individual ill at ease with themselves.

Don't take it personally - it's their problem, not yours.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

People like that filter themselves away from me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If women had golden vagina’s would that be where golden showers comes from?!

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Although it states clearly in the rules that no reply means not interested, there's another reason I sometimes don't reply. More often than a lot of men think (I'm talking about generally, I haven't had it happen here yet), as a woman, if you say "no thanks" you're subject to abuse or even threats. Some men act on those threats. It's safer to just disengage.

Would you do that? I have no idea. Is it worth the risk for me? Absolutely not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You wouldn't want to meet rude and arrogant people would you? They have done you a favour. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you get arrogance and rudeness everywhere OP and I agree it's un called for

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By *ammers43Man
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

"you get arrogance and rudeness everywhere OP and I agree it's un called for"

Dont you just

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Nobody is entitled to a reply op so that's not rude and you get arrogant men on fab also,it's not gender specific.

Miss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The replies/none replies/ rude replies

Demands/ the way they message by completely ignoring your profile but demand you read there’s etc"
The demands make me laugh, clearly when person/s would not even meet their own standards set.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't reply to messages so when filters are on I don't get repeat messages from people I'm not interested in.

If I reply, it makes the filters useless.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I am TOTALLY with the O.P. on this one.

I'm ready to meet you O.P.

I've read your profile and taken it all on board.

I want the drinks, drinks, drinks, drinks and then the sex.

All sex is good sex you say in your profile.

My Kinda sex is Barbarella sex ( jane fonda film ) My palm on your palm.

Don't knock it till you've tried it you said!!! in your profile.

Don't be arrogant now. Mwah x Mwah x

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Woooooooooooo im def in there. He does it with 99 year olds !

I'm a spring chicken.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Woooooooooooo im def in there. He does it with 99 year olds !

I'm a spring chicken. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't reply to messages so when filters are on I don't get repeat messages from people I'm not interested in.

If I reply, it makes the filters useless. "

Very good point.

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By *ilkmanxxx OP Man
over a year ago

Sin City

Thanks for all your post and insights

I understand and accept not everyone is for everyone and I would be foolish to think otherwise

And I also know an accept people do things differently,again normal no problem

But however way people do stuff I don’t see the reason for arrogance and rudeness in things.

The risky sex is protected safe sex with the risk of getting caught (just to clear that up)

Not replying mid convo, if not interested a simple

Sorry I’m not interested happy swinging of something can’t hurt can it.

I don’t expect a reply at all because as a few of you said, get the message which I absolutely do without me pestering or harassing them.

Again thanks for your post and views

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"It's arrogant expecting a reply."

I was just going to say that - the arrogance is most often from the one complaining that they 'damn well should be replying to messages from ME!!'

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I don't reply to messages so when filters are on I don't get repeat messages from people I'm not interested in.

If I reply, it makes the filters useless. "

Yes that is a good point, and I get 'first' messages from people outside of my filters and then see I replied to them over a year ago.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Although it states clearly in the rules that no reply means not interested, there's another reason I sometimes don't reply. More often than a lot of men think (I'm talking about generally, I haven't had it happen here yet), as a woman, if you say "no thanks" you're subject to abuse or even threats. Some men act on those threats. It's safer to just disengage.

Would you do that? I have no idea. Is it worth the risk for me? Absolutely not. "

Yup, by far the best method for avoiding abuse is to delete without replying, sad but true.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Thanks for all your post and insights

I understand and accept not everyone is for everyone and I would be foolish to think otherwise

And I also know an accept people do things differently,again normal no problem

But however way people do stuff I don’t see the reason for arrogance and rudeness in things.

The risky sex is protected safe sex with the risk of getting caught (just to clear that up)

Not replying mid convo, if not interested a simple

Sorry I’m not interested happy swinging of something can’t hurt can it.

I don’t expect a reply at all because as a few of you said, get the message which I absolutely do without me pestering or harassing them.

Again thanks for your post and views "

If you accept all of that what exactly is arrogant about your (lack of) interactions with them?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

That was his knob talking. He's a better man now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Damn it! How did you find out about my golden vagina!?!?

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By *acktar74Man
over a year ago

leeds

"Damn it! How did you find out about my golden vagina!?!?

You posted pic on here

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By *ogisticalBigManMan
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Damn it! How did you find out about my golden vagina!?!?

Willy wonka let slip

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try and reply to as many messages as possible but I hope that the ones I don't answer don't think its because I'm arrogant. I have no golden orifices or think I'm too good to talk to certain people but at the same time, I have a life outside fab and can't reply to 100s every day x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Damn it! How did you find out about my golden vagina!?!?

You posted pic on here "

Ooppss!

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By *acktar74Man
over a year ago

leeds

"Damn it! How did you find out about my golden vagina!?!?

You posted pic on here

Ooppss!

It's ok I didn't tell any one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would you do that? I have no idea. Is it worth the risk for me? Absolutely not.

Yup, by far the best method for avoiding abuse is to delete without replying, sad but true."

I've always replied to all first messages and I pretty much never get abuse.

Had some very crude messages today off a guy and even though my reply was negative he was super nice and thanked me for replying.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From a single guys point of view, I say suck it up and move on, I have had loads of deleted, left open for weeks, or just ignored messages, yes it's frustrating, yes I have had a few harsh replays, but also some nice thanks but no thanks replays, it's just part of the game

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