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Rude?!

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By *arlo82 OP   Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places

Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

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By *igga_manMan
over a year ago

near Reading

Thanks but no thanks always works for me. I find that far more polite then my message being deleted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Babe I am sick to the back teeth of getting abuse for gently declining.

If I feel like the message was well thought out and they have put effort in I always reply, even if it's a no thanks. But I'm starting to become bitter about doing that now as the abuse just isn't worth it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sorry darl but you've been here long enough to know the score on that one

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By *oredShitlessxxxCouple
over a year ago

luton


"I'm sorry darl but you've been here long enough to know the score on that one"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy? "

I think for some not replying would be better than recieving a knock back.

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

It’s worse when they send their OH to carry it on on a different profile.

‘Oh sorry. I’ve changed my mind now. Come straight round’.

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

Just delete and block. I thought people exaggerated on here until my ex showed me the sheer amount of messages she got. It’s funny how one minute she was hot as hell the next a dog when she said no.

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

And that is why I now never answer any message I am not interested in, I can't be arsed with dealing with abuse that may be coming my way.

I have enough arseholes to deal with in real life as it is

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By *arlo82 OP   Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places


"Babe I am sick to the back teeth of getting abuse for gently declining.

If I feel like the message was well thought out and they have put effort in I always reply, even if it's a no thanks. But I'm starting to become bitter about doing that now as the abuse just isn't worth it "

If i message and someone says no ta I say thank you and wish them well.. just becoming awful saying no thanks

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By *esus H ChristMan
over a year ago

birmingham

I appreciate a " thanks but no thanks" but if my message is just deleted I don't take it personally either, especially with the amount of messages you ladies receive.....Peace & Love to all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm sorry darl but you've been here long enough to know the score on that one

"

Quite.

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By *arlo82 OP   Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places


"It’s worse when they send their OH to carry it on on a different profile.

‘Oh sorry. I’ve changed my mind now. Come straight round’. "

Haha yes very true! That was something else

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d much rather get a message back with a polite “no thanks” than be completely ignored.

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy? "

Until very recently we've only ever had people politely accept our "thanks but you aren't for us".

It was bound to happen at some point. .. and it happened this weekend

Some people just can't take rejection.

Nita

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you send a message to someone, doesn’t that automatically mean you have to have sex with them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get declined all the time and to be honest I always prefer the people who spend the time to reply and say no thanks and I always reply with a thank you it’s just polite and nice and after I then block them as not to harass them again with a message later on down the line

Although it’s not nice being turned down time and time again the polite people keep your hopes alive

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By *arlo82 OP   Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places


"If you send a message to someone, doesn’t that automatically mean you have to have sex with them? "

Oooh I must have missed that clause ooops silly me haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its why I just don't reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve been lucky that no one has been nasty to a refusal. Just had the insistent messages that are you sure and if you change your mind x

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By *esus H ChristMan
over a year ago

birmingham


"Its why I just don't reply. "

I'd love to know where you got your Tom Baker hat and scarf ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my 2 years here I've only had 2 people been rude to me, they're on my block list, that's why we have them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t mind getting a polite no thanks, I then thank them in return for replying and taking time to look at my profile and wish them on there merry way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i just block now -

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By *ollyGWoman
over a year ago

Southampton


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy? "

You really are having a shit time on here lately, I get that and I feel for you x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy? "

Come on Darlo, You know you're supposed to have sex with every person who messages you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is being 'rude' really so tragic?

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By *arlo82 OP   Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

Come on Darlo, You know you're supposed to have sex with every person who messages you "

I must have missed that haha

When are we messaging?

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By *arlo82 OP   Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

You really are having a shit time on here lately, I get that and I feel for you x"

I'm hoping it'll come right! I just have to focus on the positives I guess x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

Come on Darlo, You know you're supposed to have sex with every person who messages you

I must have missed that haha

When are we messaging? "

LMAO shall I send the obligatory "wish you were nearer" message x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to always politely reply, but it gives opportunity to the why? And do what’s your sort questions. I’ve also been threatened with acid in my face for politely saying sorry I don’t want to chat or meet

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By *auren001Woman
over a year ago

birmingham


"Babe I am sick to the back teeth of getting abuse for gently declining.

If I feel like the message was well thought out and they have put effort in I always reply, even if it's a no thanks. But I'm starting to become bitter about doing that now as the abuse just isn't worth it "

What this lady said. I politely declined someone today as the chat was as dry as a nuns. I got a tirade of abuse and told I probably “have loads of kids”.

Although I have to say, in my personal experience over the years (and I almost always speak exclusively to single males) abusive messages have been the exception not the rule. So I do continue to respond with a polite thanks no thanks to anyone who sends me a polite well worded message

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By *auren001Woman
over a year ago

birmingham


"I used to always politely reply, but it gives opportunity to the why? And do what’s your sort questions. I’ve also been threatened with acid in my face for politely saying sorry I don’t want to chat or meet "

OMG!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I used to always politely reply, but it gives opportunity to the why? And do what’s your sort questions. I’ve also been threatened with acid in my face for politely saying sorry I don’t want to chat or meet

OMG! "

yep,I obviously reported him

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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago

Slough Windsor ish

In 12 years on here, 8 of which on a single female profile i think i can count on my fingers how many abusive messages ive had. As it stands we have just one person blocked (its a neighbour we recognised). Thats the truth.

I must be such a munter they dont bother

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

I think for some not replying would be better than recieving a knock back."

*fires off 100 faf messages to test your theory

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By *auren001Woman
over a year ago

birmingham


"I used to always politely reply, but it gives opportunity to the why? And do what’s your sort questions. I’ve also been threatened with acid in my face for politely saying sorry I don’t want to chat or meet

OMG! yep,I obviously reported him"

What a vicious thing to say to another person, I’m gobsmacked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"In 12 years on here, 8 of which on a single female profile i think i can count on my fingers how many abusive messages ive had. As it stands we have just one person blocked (its a neighbour we recognised). Thats the truth.

I must be such a munter they dont bother "

Same. I reply to all first messages and can't remember the last abusive message. People usually reply to say thank you for replying.

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By *arlo82 OP   Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

Come on Darlo, You know you're supposed to have sex with every person who messages you

I must have missed that haha

When are we messaging?

LMAO shall I send the obligatory "wish you were nearer" message x"

Oh yes please . ... I'll try and refrain from the "do you use kik babe, we could cam" hahahaha

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

I just hide my profile for a bit. I'm not a piece of meat, you know ladies.

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

Thing is. Where does it stop. I’ve replied. They thanked me for replying (which I didn’t reply to) then I’m a time waster. lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I used to always politely reply, but it gives opportunity to the why? And do what’s your sort questions. I’ve also been threatened with acid in my face for politely saying sorry I don’t want to chat or meet

OMG! yep,I obviously reported him

What a vicious thing to say to another person, I’m gobsmacked "

I was as well. There’s was lots of other abuse with it aswel

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile."

Of course they don't deserve abuse.

The OP didn't receive an abusive message.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

Of course they don't deserve abuse.

The OP didn't receive an abusive message. "

Would you consider something along the lines of "I wanna fuck your ass" or worse as an opening message appropriate, I wouldn't.

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester

I got " sorry u don't do it for me" hahaha I thought it was ace. Always be honest only willy wonka sugar coats shit

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy? "

It's difficult to tell what kind of reaction you may get, I would just not respond to people that hold no interest for me. I've learnt the hard way, faq section states no reply is no interest and not considered rude.

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By *arlo82 OP   Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

Of course they don't deserve abuse.

The OP didn't receive an abusive message. "

The OP does and has had a lot of abuse today for saying sorry no thank you and called rude for doing so.

That's why I was curious as to why a polite no is considered rude. If I'd messaged saying you're an ugly twat and I wouldnt ride you into battle then yes that would be me bein rude.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd actually prefer to hear no I'm not interested than just being ignored and deleted but what can you do. Don't understand the reason behind getting pissy over being turned down. Would hope people wouldn't react like that if they got turned down in a bar.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"I'd actually prefer to hear no I'm not interested than just being ignored and deleted but what can you do. Don't understand the reason behind getting pissy over being turned down. Would hope people wouldn't react like that if they got turned down in a bar. "
of course the wouldn't be like that in a bar, they only do it here because they can hide behind their keyboard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile."

I've had 3 bad message, being rude to me, out of hundreds, maybe a thousand. Why I don't get them I don't know; maybe, they are secretly relieved I turned them down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really do wonder why I don't get the abuse lots of other women seem to. My replies are either- not what I'm looking for sorry, or no thank you. Short and sweet and no nasty replies.

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

I've had 3 bad message, being rude to me, out of hundreds, maybe a thousand. Why I don't get them I don't know; maybe, they are secretly relieved I turned them down. "

it's the sexy slippers. No1 will ever dismiss u.. pure filth they are xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

I've had 3 bad message, being rude to me, out of hundreds, maybe a thousand. Why I don't get them I don't know; maybe, they are secretly relieved I turned them down. it's the sexy slippers. No1 will ever dismiss u.. pure filth they are xx"

I'm taking that (better than my thesis that I'm the bottom of the barrel for them, and they aren't that bothered I said no).

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

I've had 3 bad message, being rude to me, out of hundreds, maybe a thousand. Why I don't get them I don't know; maybe, they are secretly relieved I turned them down. it's the sexy slippers. No1 will ever dismiss u.. pure filth they are xx

I'm taking that (better than my thesis that I'm the bottom of the barrel for them, and they aren't that bothered I said no)."

they maybe don't like pink?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile."

Perhaps it's to show balance. Some women like to shout out about every piddling message they receive. We know some people send twatish messages. we know they shouldn't be allowed to but they do. Deal with it and stop bleating on. Ignore. Block. Report. Depending on severity. It's really not worth making a drama over every little thing.... and I don't get abusive messages because I never reply

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By *ideboy7.5Man
over a year ago

pill


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy? "

no! I prefer a reply,mostly will reply with a thanks and best wishes,its only right and civil.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

Perhaps it's to show balance. Some women like to shout out about every piddling message they receive. We know some people send twatish messages. we know they shouldn't be allowed to but they do. Deal with it and stop bleating on. Ignore. Block. Report. Depending on severity. It's really not worth making a drama over every little thing.... and I don't get abusive messages because I never reply "

Well we both know there's a difference between a "twatish" message and an abusive one.

Some of us recieve abuse on the first message, and some of us receive abuse even though we don't reply.

Congratulations to you though for not getting any, You must be really proud

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester

If they think saying no thanks is rude then they must have a high opinion of themselves. U should of bullet pointed the reasons y u said no...

Ugly

Fanny like a butchers apron

Had bigger tooth picks in my mouth

Etc etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I really do wonder why I don't get the abuse lots of other women seem to. My replies are either- not what I'm looking for sorry, or no thank you. Short and sweet and no nasty replies. "

I don't reply most of the time and 90% of the abuse messages I've received have been on the first message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I consider it rude if you ask for a pic but won't reciprocate or block when asked to after just asking for a pic especially if you've been messaging for a while

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester


"I consider it rude if you ask for a pic but won't reciprocate or block when asked to after just asking for a pic especially if you've been messaging for a while"
I always think it's someone we know

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ


"I just hide my profile for a bit. I'm not a piece of meat, you know ladies. "

Another Piece Of Meat - Scorpions

www.youtube.com/watch?v=HsSHDz1kl18

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

Of course they don't deserve abuse.

The OP didn't receive an abusive message.

The OP does and has had a lot of abuse today for saying sorry no thank you and called rude for doing so.

That's why I was curious as to why a polite no is considered rude. If I'd messaged saying you're an ugly twat and I wouldnt ride you into battle then yes that would be me bein rude. "

Ah then I apologise and I agree with your twat/ battle comment. I was referring to the OP where you said you were called rude. You didn't say you got abuse too.

Of course it's not rude to turn any man down that asks for a fuck but men like that have no clue. They think we're free prostitutes here for their benefit. So why feel bad about someone like that calling you rude?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I consider it rude if you ask for a pic but won't reciprocate or block when asked to after just asking for a pic especially if you've been messaging for a while"

Cos you where chatting to a bloke

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I send a message, I don’t expect a reply...I hope for one, but there’s no god given right I have to have one, as I’ve invaded your privacy without your permission.

I don’t ever check to see if that message has been read as my thinking is that you’ll get in touch if you are interested.

Even if you don’t get in touch it could be for reasons other than you don’t like me...you could be busy, you could have enough buddies right now, you could be consumed with an upcoming meet.

I would never send another message until I got one off you.

I would just block if I was a woman on here...you get that many messages, it’s not worth the hassle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

Of course they don't deserve abuse.

The OP didn't receive an abusive message.

The OP does and has had a lot of abuse today for saying sorry no thank you and called rude for doing so.

That's why I was curious as to why a polite no is considered rude. If I'd messaged saying you're an ugly twat and I wouldnt ride you into battle then yes that would be me bein rude.

Ah then I apologise and I agree with your twat/ battle comment. I was referring to the OP where you said you were called rude. You didn't say you got abuse too.

Of course it's not rude to turn any man down that asks for a fuck but men like that have no clue. They think we're free prostitutes here for their benefit. So why feel bad about someone like that calling you rude?

"

She didn't say she feels bad? She was asking a question

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If they think saying no thanks is rude then they must have a high opinion of themselves. U should of bullet pointed the reasons y u said no...

Ugly

Fanny like a butchers apron

Had bigger tooth picks in my mouth

Etc etc"

Then you are just at the same level as they are. I have no sympathy at all for people that send abuse back like that. It just keeps the cycle going and it's incredibly childish.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I consider it rude if you ask for a pic but won't reciprocate or block when asked to after just asking for a pic especially if you've been messaging for a while

Cos you where chatting to a bloke "

damn that's where I'm going wrong l so the two ladies I was chatting to today we're fellas

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By *eardsandboobsCouple
over a year ago

north of lincoln

We read them and them mark the messages as unread then delete them after a week. Saves hassle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depending on the age of person, the word ‘rude’ seems to be a throwaway retort. My daughter says it back to me when she hears something she doesn’t like...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally if someone takes time to saysorry not for us i think thats good manners we re not all for everyones taste

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester


"If they think saying no thanks is rude then they must have a high opinion of themselves. U should of bullet pointed the reasons y u said no...

Ugly

Fanny like a butchers apron

Had bigger tooth picks in my mouth

Etc etc

Then you are just at the same level as they are. I have no sympathy at all for people that send abuse back like that. It just keeps the cycle going and it's incredibly childish. "

yes.... yes I am

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By *auren001Woman
over a year ago

birmingham


"If I send a message, I don’t expect a reply...I hope for one, but there’s no god given right I have to have one, as I’ve invaded your privacy without your permission.

I don’t ever check to see if that message has been read as my thinking is that you’ll get in touch if you are interested.

Even if you don’t get in touch it could be for reasons other than you don’t like me...you could be busy, you could have enough buddies right now, you could be consumed with an upcoming meet.

I would never send another message until I got one off you.

I would just block if I was a woman on here...you get that many messages, it’s not worth the hassle "

Sensible answer

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester

If I said no then that's the end. If I got a mouthful then u r gonna hear it straight...

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By *aeBabeWoman
over a year ago

London


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile."

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If they think saying no thanks is rude then they must have a high opinion of themselves. U should of bullet pointed the reasons y u said no...

Ugly

Fanny like a butchers apron

Had bigger tooth picks in my mouth

Etc etc

Then you are just at the same level as they are. I have no sympathy at all for people that send abuse back like that. It just keeps the cycle going and it's incredibly childish. yes.... yes I am"

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester


"If they think saying no thanks is rude then they must have a high opinion of themselves. U should of bullet pointed the reasons y u said no...

Ugly

Fanny like a butchers apron

Had bigger tooth picks in my mouth

Etc etc

Then you are just at the same level as they are. I have no sympathy at all for people that send abuse back like that. It just keeps the cycle going and it's incredibly childish. yes.... yes I am

"

sorry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile."

I get the occasional random abusive message, as an opener too which is hilarious, like I’m going to reply after that.

I don’t think anyone deserves abuse (regardless of gender) but some women do seem to attract a lot of drama, intentional or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile."

Agreed. I think it’s fascina when people tell other people how they are supposed to feel or define as absuive or rude. Just because one person thinks it might be rude rather than abusive does not make that a universal truth. Enough with the undermining other people’s experience, have your opinion but don’t foist it or demand that it is the only possibility. I find it abusive that some do so. Not rude, abusive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

Agreed. I think it’s fascina when people tell other people how they are supposed to feel or define as absuive or rude. Just because one person thinks it might be rude rather than abusive does not make that a universal truth. Enough with the undermining other people’s experience, have your opinion but don’t foist it or demand that it is the only possibility. I find it abusive that some do so. Not rude, abusive. "

*fascinating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like attracts like.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy? "

I was called a cunt and blocked by a lady last week for saying just that. My exact words were “nice pics but you’re not for me, good luck” and I’m a cunt apparently.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

I was called a cunt and blocked by a lady last week for saying just that. My exact words were “nice pics but you’re not for me, good luck” and I’m a cunt apparently. "

Rejection abuse is gender less...!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

I was called a cunt and blocked by a lady last week for saying just that. My exact words were “nice pics but you’re not for me, good luck” and I’m a cunt apparently. "

And I meant it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Often thought there should be a Fab "button" people could press which sent back a polite Fabesque

no thanks type reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Like attracts like. "

Do you have a particular issue with this OP?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Like attracts like.

Do you have a particular issue with this OP? "

Strange question. I wasn't replying to the OP. It was a general comment.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Like attracts like.

Do you have a particular issue with this OP?

Strange question. I wasn't replying to the OP. It was a general comment. "

Mmmm. Yeah.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Like attracts like.

Do you have a particular issue with this OP?

Strange question. I wasn't replying to the OP. It was a general comment.

Mmmm. Yeah."

Spit it out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On the positive side I've had a good few no thanks or sorry your to far or not what we are looking for .....then ended up meeting a year later ..

I'm never rude . I always reply thankyou for taking the time to reply .

Saves getting blocked and upsetting people in necessarily.

Bet the bloke in question wouldn't meet with someone he didn't fancy or want to .

Its all about manners courtesy and respect at the end of the day ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be kind, always

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/03/18 23:34:12]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Be kind, always "

Yes

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Like attracts like.

Do you have a particular issue with this OP?

Strange question. I wasn't replying to the OP. It was a general comment.

Mmmm. Yeah.

Spit it out. "

I’m good thanks, said what I wanted and got your answer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tell men the people they’ve met are repulsive so I won’t meet them and they have a hissy fit and say they are nice men and why won’t I meet them.

Trials and tribulations

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester


"I tell men the people they’ve met are repulsive so I won’t meet them and they have a hissy fit and say they are nice men and why won’t I meet them.

Trials and tribulations "

is that why u don't show veris?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I tell men the people they’ve met are repulsive so I won’t meet them and they have a hissy fit and say they are nice men and why won’t I meet them.

Trials and tribulations is that why u don't show veris? "

Nope.

I’m quoting from a source

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

There's a high number of guys here who have limited social skills and worse levels of ability to engage in a sexually captivating style with finesse. They try to bulldoze over a polite decline to their advances, which should never be done by anyone and some of them become abusive.

It is better to block. The worst will probably give up here, If enough of us cold shoulder them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Like attracts like.

Do you have a particular issue with this OP?

Strange question. I wasn't replying to the OP. It was a general comment. "

It's a strange comment actually not a strange question

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Be kind, always "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

I think for some not replying would be better than recieving a knock back."

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Be kind, always "
dream on not everyone here is kind if they where no one would shout out in the forum

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get it all the time sorry you aren't my type or they say there someone out there for you and lots of knock back but that does not bother me one bit. Because it no skin of my nose.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This might seem a strange question too.

But does anyone know how to disable local update feeds?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This might seem a strange question too.

But does anyone know how to disable local update feeds?"

Block men and they don't show. I don't know if it works for anyone else you block.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it would be quite good to have a function where a person receiving the rejection can’t message again for a period of time. We don’t like to block people, but could do without all the ‘thank you for replying’ messages. When we politely say no we’d like to know that that is the end of that particular conversation.

Mrs

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester


"This might seem a strange question too.

But does anyone know how to disable local update feeds?"

oh dear was it u??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This might seem a strange question too.

But does anyone know how to disable local update feeds?

Block men and they don't show. I don't know if it works for anyone else you block."

I don't see men now to. ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This might seem a strange question too.

But does anyone know how to disable local update feeds?oh dear was it u??"

I never need to post first

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester


"This might seem a strange question too.

But does anyone know how to disable local update feeds?oh dear was it u??

I never need to post first "

love it x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We simply delete and if they message again we block.

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By *ccasionalfunCouple
over a year ago

hereandthere

If it's obvious they have not read profile I delete. Sometimes I have a bit of fun and tease them just for a laugh

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester


"If it's obvious they have not read profile I delete. Sometimes I have a bit of fun and tease them just for a laugh "
is that a real rabbit head?

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester


"If it's obvious they have not read profile I delete. Sometimes I have a bit of fun and tease them just for a laugh is that a real rabbit head?"
now that's a filter! !!

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By *issyme555TV/TS
over a year ago

Motherwell

I would be great full for a no thank you. accept it and move on any one who moans or get abusive after getting wants to be great full they got a no thank you. Not just deleted.

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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago

Northampton

Dunno. Why not make a thread about it and find out??

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By *abulously curiousCouple
over a year ago

manchester

Great bants

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes better to read .If not the sort of person who you looking for then block it avoids getting abusive mail back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have now started politely telling them the truth,

Like too far away..

Too short profile...

No pics

Ect

Then blocking them.

Saves any abuse

XXX

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

Never replied to anyone outside my meet criteria and a respectful decline to those who met it but I didn't fancy has resulted in eight years on site without one nasty message.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile."

Whilst I understand your point of view the women who complain are the ones that appear to reply to every message they receive whether the person meets their criteria or not because they "don't want to appear rude".

Perhaps if they were circumspect in their messaging and block after sending a "thanks no thanks" message they'd have a happier experience...just a thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Babe I am sick to the back teeth of getting abuse for gently declining.

If I feel like the message was well thought out and they have put effort in I always reply, even if it's a no thanks. But I'm starting to become bitter about doing that now as the abuse just isn't worth it

If i message and someone says no ta I say thank you and wish them well.. just becoming awful saying no thanks "

who the hell would say no to you

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"

I don’t think anyone deserves abuse (regardless of gender) but some women do seem to attract a lot of drama, intentional or not."

Yep!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy? "

I always send a thank you for being politely declined. I appreciate the fact they gave taken the time and trouble to respond even if its a no thanks.

Never any need to be rude. Ignore the ignorant and keep on doing it please darlo not enough politeness in the world.

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville


"Like attracts like.

Do you have a particular issue with this OP?

Strange question. I wasn't replying to the OP. It was a general comment.

It's a strange comment actually not a strange question "

Yes they do. I’ve noticed them trolling the OP on other threads and called them out for it. So has another lady. Enough I think it’s embarrassing to view

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By *arlo82 OP   Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

Whilst I understand your point of view the women who complain are the ones that appear to reply to every message they receive whether the person meets their criteria or not because they "don't want to appear rude".

Perhaps if they were circumspect in their messaging and block after sending a "thanks no thanks" message they'd have a happier experience...just a thought. "

No I don't reply to all messages

Well thought out ones with a face pic attached i will as it hasn't been the standard "hey" or "you free".

I believe manners cost nothing hence when it is a proper message I will reply if they aren't my taste so they know rather than believe the message has been lost or I'm ignorant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I appreciate a " thanks but no thanks" but if my message is just deleted I don't take it personally either, especially with the amount of messages you ladies receive.....Peace & Love to all "

I’d have to say the same goes for me. “A thanks, but no thanks” is a lovely way, I always try to be polite even when their response is “Duck off”.

Do people forget we all talk and bad Khama spreads?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

I always send a thank you for being politely declined. I appreciate the fact they gave taken the time and trouble to respond even if its a no thanks.

Never any need to be rude. Ignore the ignorant and keep on doing it please darlo not enough politeness in the world. "

To be quite honest I find it a little bit rude when guys thank us for replying. It makes me feel like our wishes to cease that particular conversation have not been respected, and it does put me off sending a polite rejection.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I appreciate a " thanks but no thanks" but if my message is just deleted I don't take it personally either, especially with the amount of messages you ladies receive.....Peace & Love to all

I’d have to say the same goes for me. “A thanks, but no thanks” is a lovely way, I always try to be polite even when their response is “Duck off”.

Do people forget we all talk and bad Khama spreads?"

Do you report abusive messages?

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"I think it would be quite good to have a function where a person receiving the rejection can’t message again for a period of time. We don’t like to block people, but could do without all the ‘thank you for replying’ messages. When we politely say no we’d like to know that that is the end of that particular conversation.

Mrs"

Excellent idea - I must remember to fill in the questionaire and ask for the 'polite no thanks' button! !

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think it would be quite good to have a function where a person receiving the rejection can’t message again for a period of time. We don’t like to block people, but could do without all the ‘thank you for replying’ messages. When we politely say no we’d like to know that that is the end of that particular conversation.

Mrs

Excellent idea - I must remember to fill in the questionaire and ask for the 'polite no thanks' button! !"

It has to come with a temporary partial block though. Not a full block, just prevent them replying to the reply,

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

I think just about everyone has wished for a ‘polite no thanks button’ over the years. Hope it happens

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"I think it would be quite good to have a function where a person receiving the rejection can’t message again for a period of time. We don’t like to block people, but could do without all the ‘thank you for replying’ messages. When we politely say no we’d like to know that that is the end of that particular conversation.

Mrs

Excellent idea - I must remember to fill in the questionaire and ask for the 'polite no thanks' button! !

It has to come with a temporary partial block though. Not a full block, just prevent them replying to the reply, "

That would be useful yes. I have a feeling that a no button would avoid abuse - the guy doesn't get ignored, but if he gets a dozen a day the same I think it ceases to become a personal communication warranting a reply and might just be accepted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think it would be quite good to have a function where a person receiving the rejection can’t message again for a period of time. We don’t like to block people, but could do without all the ‘thank you for replying’ messages. When we politely say no we’d like to know that that is the end of that particular conversation.

Mrs

Excellent idea - I must remember to fill in the questionaire and ask for the 'polite no thanks' button! !"

Aw the survey. ..that needs a bump

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I see the victim blaming is strong in this thread.

I personally enjoy the reply to my very polite rejections - 'oh that wasn't meant for you, you're not my type as you're an ugly cow I wouldn't be seen dead with'

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Like attracts like.

Do you have a particular issue with this OP?

Strange question. I wasn't replying to the OP. It was a general comment.

It's a strange comment actually not a strange question

Yes they do. I’ve noticed them trolling the OP on other threads and called them out for it. So has another lady. Enough I think it’s embarrassing to view "

So have I. And yes, it isn’t enjoyable viewing.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think it would be quite good to have a function where a person receiving the rejection can’t message again for a period of time. We don’t like to block people, but could do without all the ‘thank you for replying’ messages. When we politely say no we’d like to know that that is the end of that particular conversation.

Mrs

Excellent idea - I must remember to fill in the questionaire and ask for the 'polite no thanks' button! !"

It was one of my suggestions when I completed it

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You did the right thing..Don't let one bad egg to ruin it for everyone..no thanks is great

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I see the victim blaming is strong in this thread.

I personally enjoy the reply to my very polite rejections - 'oh that wasn't meant for you, you're not my type as you're an ugly cow I wouldn't be seen dead with' "

I've had 4 of those types of replies. They make me laugh more than anything. I've had a couple of people message me, one from a couple's account, who said I was too big for them anyway. It's their defence mechanism and doesn't bother me at all.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"So weird when women post on here about receiving abuse there's always others who feel the need to comment the fact that they've never had abuse and subtly try and blame the woman posting about.

Great! You've never been sent an abusive message, that's not really related to the original post though is it?

It's almost as if some of you think that certain women deserve abuse because of how they run their profile.

Whilst I understand your point of view the women who complain are the ones that appear to reply to every message they receive whether the person meets their criteria or not because they "don't want to appear rude".

Perhaps if they were circumspect in their messaging and block after sending a "thanks no thanks" message they'd have a happier experience...just a thought.

No I don't reply to all messages

Well thought out ones with a face pic attached i will as it hasn't been the standard "hey" or "you free".

I believe manners cost nothing hence when it is a proper message I will reply if they aren't my taste so they know rather than believe the message has been lost or I'm ignorant "

Hereby proving my point.

I could care less if someone has written a sonnet to rival Shakespeare if his profile doesn't match what I'm looking for, if he can write he can read.

A brief message from someone meeting what I'm looking for always gets a response...Never had abuse/negative response.

It works for me, others may continue to reply to all in order not appear rude, but wear big girl pants and exercise your report button finger as you'll be using it frequently.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"I think just about everyone has wished for a ‘polite no thanks button’ over the years. Hope it happens "

Having been on sites with such a button I can assure you it doesn't work. The entitled bitch and moan about impersonal no thanks messages.

Fab has had a no thanks button in the past and removed it because...people bitched and moaned about impersonal messages.

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire


"I think just about everyone has wished for a ‘polite no thanks button’ over the years. Hope it happens

Having been on sites with such a button I can assure you it doesn't work. The entitled bitch and moan about impersonal no thanks messages.

Fab has had a no thanks button in the past and removed it because...people bitched and moaned about impersonal messages. "

Can’t win with em can you. Moan if you don’t reply, moan if you do.

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By *onnie And Clyde9070Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

Recently we've been quite surprised at the number of polite messages we've received back after saying "no thanks". Of course there are the dented ego crew who have to send abuse and then block you. But they forget the report function is still there.

It's definitely not rude to say no. It's just that your answer isn't what they want to hear.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy? "

It’s not rude at all. Honesty is indeed the best policy. I’d say it’s people not able to handle the rejection from yourself. Maybe have it in their heads that they’ll have you. And can’t hamdle it when they find out they can’t?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Courteous to say no thanks ofc!. But some folk i think take a response, albeit a 'no luck here mate' one and get all butthurt.. i appreciate common courtesy irrespective

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

It’s not rude at all. Honesty is indeed the best policy. I’d say it’s people not able to handle the rejection from yourself. Maybe have it in their heads that they’ll have you. And can’t hamdle it when they find out they can’t?"

I don’t think honesty is the best policy. I absolutely do not need it rubbed in my face that I’m not someone’s type. For me it would be much kinder to subtly ignore me.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I see the victim blaming is strong in this thread.

I personally enjoy the reply to my very polite rejections - 'oh that wasn't meant for you, you're not my type as you're an ugly cow I wouldn't be seen dead with'

I've had 4 of those types of replies. They make me laugh more than anything. I've had a couple of people message me, one from a couple's account, who said I was too big for them anyway. It's their defence mechanism and doesn't bother me at all. "

That's a good point. Perhaps people have different opinions on what they consider abusive/ an issue.

I often get replies to thank me for replying with a "no thank you" (instead of deleting without reply) but I think they are being nice.

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By *p4funCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth


"If you send a message to someone, doesn’t that automatically mean you have to have sex with them? "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you apply for a job with certain organisations, it’s made very clear that if you don’t hear back in a certain amount of time then assume you haven’t been shortlisted. I often wonder surely an automated email response would be helpful. To hear that on something as unimportant as a swingers site, that not only is an ignore unacceptable, but an automated rejection message is also unacceptable, is crazy. Seriously! When even automated replies are not expected in the real world, people are wanting personalised rejection messages on Fab. That kind of elevated this site to a higher level of importance than applying for a job.

Mrs

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Like attracts like.

Do you have a particular issue with this OP?

Strange question. I wasn't replying to the OP. It was a general comment.

It's a strange comment actually not a strange question

Yes they do. I’ve noticed them trolling the OP on other threads and called them out for it. So has another lady. Enough I think it’s embarrassing to view

So have I. And yes, it isn’t enjoyable viewing.

"

Definitely not. The forums are supposed to be a friendly place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

I always send a thank you for being politely declined. I appreciate the fact they gave taken the time and trouble to respond even if its a no thanks.

Never any need to be rude. Ignore the ignorant and keep on doing it please darlo not enough politeness in the world.

To be quite honest I find it a little bit rude when guys thank us for replying. It makes me feel like our wishes to cease that particular conversation have not been respected, and it does put me off sending a polite rejection.

Mrs "

I must admit I hadn't thought of that...The way I was brought up it was always considered polite that when someone answered a letter or a message to say thank you to that person for answering. I will have to ignore my upbringing and not respond in future.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

I always send a thank you for being politely declined. I appreciate the fact they gave taken the time and trouble to respond even if its a no thanks.

Never any need to be rude. Ignore the ignorant and keep on doing it please darlo not enough politeness in the world.

To be quite honest I find it a little bit rude when guys thank us for replying. It makes me feel like our wishes to cease that particular conversation have not been respected, and it does put me off sending a polite rejection.

Mrs

I must admit I hadn't thought of that...The way I was brought up it was always considered polite that when someone answered a letter or a message to say thank you to that person for answering. I will have to ignore my upbringing and not respond in future."

I was brought up to be polite. My mother was very big on manners. But I’m afraid my mother never taught me that I should say thank you if I was sent a rejection letter. Presumably if that is correct etiquette then I should be sending ‘thank you for replying’ letters every time I am rejected after a job interview?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

I always send a thank you for being politely declined. I appreciate the fact they gave taken the time and trouble to respond even if its a no thanks.

Never any need to be rude. Ignore the ignorant and keep on doing it please darlo not enough politeness in the world.

To be quite honest I find it a little bit rude when guys thank us for replying. It makes me feel like our wishes to cease that particular conversation have not been respected, and it does put me off sending a polite rejection.

Mrs

I must admit I hadn't thought of that...The way I was brought up it was always considered polite that when someone answered a letter or a message to say thank you to that person for answering. I will have to ignore my upbringing and not respond in future.

I was brought up to be polite. My mother was very big on manners. But I’m afraid my mother never taught me that I should say thank you if I was sent a rejection letter. Presumably if that is correct etiquette then I should be sending ‘thank you for replying’ letters every time I am rejected after a job interview? "

Well, actually yes...its not only considered good manners it's also good interview technique but that is a different situation.

After due consideration I have decided that if someone feels upset by my politeness then that it is their issue not mine and that I shall continue to be what I consider to be well mannered and say thank you and wish them well for the future. I am not in any way asking to continue something that has been rejected I am merely saying thank you and goodbye, hardly offensive or rude in my opinion albeit the fact it seems be in yours.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

this is harsh but i got fed up of replying to get abuse so now i delete and delete

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

I always reply with a polite 'no thanks you have a cock'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy?

I always send a thank you for being politely declined. I appreciate the fact they gave taken the time and trouble to respond even if its a no thanks.

Never any need to be rude. Ignore the ignorant and keep on doing it please darlo not enough politeness in the world.

To be quite honest I find it a little bit rude when guys thank us for replying. It makes me feel like our wishes to cease that particular conversation have not been respected, and it does put me off sending a polite rejection.

Mrs

I must admit I hadn't thought of that...The way I was brought up it was always considered polite that when someone answered a letter or a message to say thank you to that person for answering. I will have to ignore my upbringing and not respond in future.

I was brought up to be polite. My mother was very big on manners. But I’m afraid my mother never taught me that I should say thank you if I was sent a rejection letter. Presumably if that is correct etiquette then I should be sending ‘thank you for replying’ letters every time I am rejected after a job interview?

Well, actually yes...its not only considered good manners it's also good interview technique but that is a different situation.

After due consideration I have decided that if someone feels upset by my politeness then that it is their issue not mine and that I shall continue to be what I consider to be well mannered and say thank you and wish them well for the future. I am not in any way asking to continue something that has been rejected I am merely saying thank you and goodbye, hardly offensive or rude in my opinion albeit the fact it seems be in yours."

True good manners is respecting what other people want, and I’m prepared to be wrong, but I suspect most couples and single ladies in a situation where they are often bombarded with unwanted measages, would have a preference for their polite ‘no thank you’ to signify the end of that particular conversation. Given that most of us were brought up in the ‘70s and ‘80s, prior to email, internet and texting, there probably is no blueprint from that era as to what good manners is in relation to the Internet. So if thanking someone for a reply has now become modern day etiquette, then that is a new thing associated with modern technology. It certainly didn’t happen when we were all growing up, so I would question why is it considered good manners now?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A “thanks, but no thanks” is not, and cannot be considered rude. I always appreciate the courtesy of such a response even if I’d have preferred a “get over here now” reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A “thanks, but no thanks” is not, and cannot be considered rude. I always appreciate the courtesy of such a response even if I’d have preferred a “get over here now” reply."

Nobody’s saying it’s rude to send a polite rejection. I was questioning whether it’s appropriate for the person receiving the rejection to then thank the sender for the sending a rejection email.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A “thanks, but no thanks” is not, and cannot be considered rude. I always appreciate the courtesy of such a response even if I’d have preferred a “get over here now” reply.

Nobody’s saying it’s rude to send a polite rejection. I was questioning whether it’s appropriate for the person receiving the rejection to then thank the sender for the sending a rejection email. "

It's appropriate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A “thanks, but no thanks” is not, and cannot be considered rude. I always appreciate the courtesy of such a response even if I’d have preferred a “get over here now” reply.

Nobody’s saying it’s rude to send a polite rejection. I was questioning whether it’s appropriate for the person receiving the rejection to then thank the sender for the sending a rejection email.

It's appropriate. "

Well I guess this is a new etiquette that has sprung up with the internet and electronic communication that I’m going to have to live with .maybe due to the speed that people can churn out emails.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A “thanks, but no thanks” is not, and cannot be considered rude. I always appreciate the courtesy of such a response even if I’d have preferred a “get over here now” reply.

Nobody’s saying it’s rude to send a polite rejection. I was questioning whether it’s appropriate for the person receiving the rejection to then thank the sender for the sending a rejection email.

It's appropriate.

Well I guess this is a new etiquette that has sprung up with the internet and electronic communication that I’m going to have to live with .maybe due to the speed that people can churn out emails. "

It's about how one decides to run one's profile. I find it totally acceptable to receive a message thanking me for my reply. If you don't, that's up to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A “thanks, but no thanks” is not, and cannot be considered rude. I always appreciate the courtesy of such a response even if I’d have preferred a “get over here now” reply.

Nobody’s saying it’s rude to send a polite rejection. I was questioning whether it’s appropriate for the person receiving the rejection to then thank the sender for the sending a rejection email.

It's appropriate.

Well I guess this is a new etiquette that has sprung up with the internet and electronic communication that I’m going to have to live with .maybe due to the speed that people can churn out emails.

It's about how one decides to run one's profile. I find it totally acceptable to receive a message thanking me for my reply. If you don't, that's up to you.

"

As I said, it’s something I have to live with if we are to continue to send polite rejections. It was quite a surprise though when we joined Fab and found it happening, as I’ve never come across this in any other aspect of my life.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"A “thanks, but no thanks” is not, and cannot be considered rude. I always appreciate the courtesy of such a response even if I’d have preferred a “get over here now” reply.

Nobody’s saying it’s rude to send a polite rejection. I was questioning whether it’s appropriate for the person receiving the rejection to then thank the sender for the sending a rejection email.

It's appropriate.

Well I guess this is a new etiquette that has sprung up with the internet and electronic communication that I’m going to have to live with .maybe due to the speed that people can churn out emails.

It's about how one decides to run one's profile. I find it totally acceptable to receive a message thanking me for my reply. If you don't, that's up to you.

"

But then surely you would have to reply to the thank you for the reply and then endless useless message ping pong.

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville


"A “thanks, but no thanks” is not, and cannot be considered rude. I always appreciate the courtesy of such a response even if I’d have preferred a “get over here now” reply.

Nobody’s saying it’s rude to send a polite rejection. I was questioning whether it’s appropriate for the person receiving the rejection to then thank the sender for the sending a rejection email.

It's appropriate.

Well I guess this is a new etiquette that has sprung up with the internet and electronic communication that I’m going to have to live with .maybe due to the speed that people can churn out emails.

It's about how one decides to run one's profile. I find it totally acceptable to receive a message thanking me for my reply. If you don't, that's up to you.

But then surely you would have to reply to the thank you for the reply and then endless useless message ping pong. "

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By *xyzptlk088Man
over a year ago

Galway

you weren't rude if that was your ACTUAL reply.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"you weren't rude if that was your ACTUAL reply."

Why wouldn't it have been her ACTUAL reply if that's what she's stated?

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By *xyzptlk088Man
over a year ago

Galway


"you weren't rude if that was your ACTUAL reply.

Why wouldn't it have been her ACTUAL reply if that's what she's stated? "

because sometimes people embellish

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately its a lose lose situation on here sometimes.

I've sent polite replys saying no thank you and had verbal abuse calling me a stuck up bitch and ECT.

I've not replied and had verbal abuse for that.

So my advice is not to give a sh*t as everyone is diffrent on here and they all react differently x

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude? "

It's not in my book.

Better than a delete with no arnsar.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"you weren't rude if that was your ACTUAL reply.

Why wouldn't it have been her ACTUAL reply if that's what she's stated?

because sometimes people embellish"

And some like to be pedantic.

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By *xyzptlk088Man
over a year ago

Galway


"you weren't rude if that was your ACTUAL reply.

Why wouldn't it have been her ACTUAL reply if that's what she's stated?

because sometimes people embellish

And some like to be pedantic. "

some of us have actually gotten a reply very different from the one posted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A “thanks, but no thanks” is not, and cannot be considered rude. I always appreciate the courtesy of such a response even if I’d have preferred a “get over here now” reply.

Nobody’s saying it’s rude to send a polite rejection. I was questioning whether it’s appropriate for the person receiving the rejection to then thank the sender for the sending a rejection email.

It's appropriate.

Well I guess this is a new etiquette that has sprung up with the internet and electronic communication that I’m going to have to live with .maybe due to the speed that people can churn out emails.

It's about how one decides to run one's profile. I find it totally acceptable to receive a message thanking me for my reply. If you don't, that's up to you.

But then surely you would have to reply to the thank you for the reply and then endless useless message ping pong. "

No, no one has to do anything they don't want to. Sometimes I say you're welcome, but I am a benevolent person and have a lot of patience. Perhaps that has something to do with my upbringing, I don't know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I tell men the people they’ve met are repulsive so I won’t meet them and they have a hissy fit and say they are nice men and why won’t I meet them.

Trials and tribulations "

I wonder if that's rude.

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By *occerstar579Man
over a year ago

Harrogate


"Since when has someone saying sorry you aren't my type considered rude?

A polite no thanks is all I'd have thought is required yet today all I've had is that I'm rude for saying no thanks.

Would it be preferable to just delete? I thought honesty was best policy? "

One of my biggest hates is not getting a reply. That's soo rude!!! If a lass replies to say thanks but no thanks I get a warm feeling. She has manners and is polite. So people forget that from a thanks but no thanks you can actually strike up a friendship that doesn't have to involve sex? Hate rudeness and ignorring a message height of rudeness!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find internet etiquette very difficult. It’s too easy to be rude, but equally it’s too easy to be sucked into endless messaging in the name of politeness. Today I’ve had a signed form scanned and sent back to me electronically upon my email request. I confess that I will do the modern thing and reply to that email and say thank you. Hopeful the recipient won’t feel the need to say ‘your welcome’. In the old days the form I wanted would have been sent by Royal Mail, but I would not have typed or handwritten a thank you note, put in in an envelope with a stamp and mailed it, and I certainly wouldn’t have got a ‘your welcome’ mailed back to me. Another example, the olden days equivalent of Fab were probably contact mags. I bet communications were brief. Because people had to think before they put their letter in an envelope, found a stamp and mailed it, there probably wasn’t the abuse one gets in the Internet. But there probably wasn’t the ping pong messages either. Call me old fashioned, but I feel I’m perfectly capable of being polite to people without this modern day demand for endless replies. I am the only person who feels that a large portion of time is spent clearing unnecessary emails, whether that be work, personal or Fab?

Mrs

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