FabSwingers.com forum: what do you do before a meet ?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

of to walk the dogin the sunshine before a social.

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By *elsh_lass74Woman
over a year ago

South Wales

Always shower and stuff, get ready and go!! Usual stuff lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

shower get ready and make sure i look good and smell nice

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By *DSRMan
over a year ago

leicester

I usually get stuppidly selfcouncious and take 3 showers, use mouthwash every 5 minutes and smoke a cig inbetween the mouthwash lol

yep i get weirdo'd out

that's our daz for ya

good and propper

nice one

hell yeah

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Argue with my Siamese twin about which side will face the window and which side gets to chat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I usually get stuppidly selfcouncious and take 3 showers, use mouthwash every 5 minutes and smoke a cig inbetween the mouthwash lol

yep i get weirdo'd out

that's our daz for ya

good and propper

nice one

hell yeah"

lol if i get nervous i have a drink x

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

"Argue with my Siamese twin about which side will face the window and which side gets to chat

don't listen to the voices in you head. X

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

pepper spray and a legal binding confidentiality contract....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Argue with my Siamese twin about which side will face the window and which side gets to chat

don't listen to the voices in you head. X"

How do know about the voices!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try and control the elephants

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By *evilwolfCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

Quality R&R and a light meal an hour or so at least beforehand. Spend plenty of time getting cleaned and preened, and get the wine in the chiller :P

We get the room ready, put the mood lighting on, and just love that calm before the storm

mmmmmmm lovely

Wolf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Check the bus timetables from holloway, read the regulations regarding tagging and curfew, ensure the ramp is installed at the front door, get a bowl of water for her labrador, and ensure the furniture is pushed against the Walls.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Check the bus timetables from holloway, read the regulations regarding tagging and curfew, ensure the ramp is installed at the front door, get a bowl of water for her labrador, and ensure the furniture is pushed against the Walls....."

I havnt got a labrador

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get excited!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I havnt got a labrador

In your case, I make sure there is ample parking space for your mobility scooter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I havnt got a labrador

In your case, I make sure there is ample parking space for your mobility scooter"

Bar Steward

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Panic and run round like a headless chicken

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Pray!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I usually have a shit, just to make sure I don't fart and all that ..

After that I scrape the cheese from under my helmet then I consider myself ready

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

think

what if they look like Frankenstein

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"think

what if they look like Frankenstein "

Grab them by the nuts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do a full background and CRB check

And that's just fa drinks xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like to perform an old Tibetan relaxation ritual consisting of deep-breathing exercises and the use of an extra large carrot, this is followed by half a dozen squat-thrusts whilst singing along to the theme from the Dambusters………

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By *uud 4-funMan
over a year ago

Dartford

Get on the internet, look up Multimap and try to figure out how to get to where I'm about to go.

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By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth

umm before a meet... keep checking my messages to see if anyone ACTUALY wants to meet us... free cuppa anyone?

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"umm before a meet... keep checking my messages to see if anyone ACTUALY wants to meet us... free cuppa anyone?

Are there biscuits with that?

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By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth

"umm before a meet... keep checking my messages to see if anyone ACTUALY wants to meet us... free cuppa anyone?

Are there biscuits with that?"

yes pink wafers and chocolate bonbons. and i can russle up some toast and nuttela too..

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"umm before a meet... keep checking my messages to see if anyone ACTUALY wants to meet us... free cuppa anyone?

Are there biscuits with that?

yes pink wafers and chocolate bonbons. and i can russle up some toast and nuttela too..

Are the bonbons individually wrapped, or just kind of on a plate?

(I'll leave the nutella thanks)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"umm before a meet... keep checking my messages to see if anyone ACTUALY wants to meet us... free cuppa anyone?

Are there biscuits with that?

yes pink wafers and chocolate bonbons. and i can russle up some toast and nuttela too..

Throw in steak and chips an I'll think about it xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

usual stuff and then suddenly realise I have only got a couple of hours and run round like headless chicken.

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By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth

"umm before a meet... keep checking my messages to see if anyone ACTUALY wants to meet us... free cuppa anyone?

Are there biscuits with that?

yes pink wafers and chocolate bonbons. and i can russle up some toast and nuttela too..

Are the bonbons individually wrapped, or just kind of on a plate?

(I'll leave the nutella thanks)"

individually wrapped in the thinest gold leaf....then arranged over my body in a line....

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By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth

"umm before a meet... keep checking my messages to see if anyone ACTUALY wants to meet us... free cuppa anyone?

Are there biscuits with that?

yes pink wafers and chocolate bonbons. and i can russle up some toast and nuttela too..

Throw in steak and chips an I'll think about it xx

ohh soapy, do ya want red sauce and hellmans with that?

)( not above bribeing someone for a meet )

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

individually wrapped in the thinest gold leaf....then arranged over my body in a line....

Ooooh!

Do I get to keep the gold leaf?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

First eat. Quite a large meal, plenty of carbs as I reason I'll usually need my energy....Second take a long bath, shave (face and body) and shave and trim cock (the hair that is, I have no intention of trimming my old chap itself) and cut nails. Third moisturise, deodorant, aftershave, Fourth brush teeth, floss, mouthwash. Fifth decide which clothes to wear. Sixth change mind and put on different clothes. Seventh sort hair out. Eighth get together everything I will need, mobile (checking texts in the process) car keys, condoms, oil, anything else?....Ninth finally set off for a delicious time. Tenth enjoy said delicious time immensely!

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

ohh soapy, do ya want red sauce and hellmans with that? "

It's NOT red sauce, it's tomato sauce.

Grrr.

(and if he even THINKS about having tomato sauce and mayonnaise on the same plate there will be hell to pay)

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By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth

ohh soapy, do ya want red sauce and hellmans with that?

It's NOT red sauce, it's tomato sauce.

Grrr.

(and if he even THINKS about having tomato sauce and mayonnaise on the same plate there will be hell to pay)"

ohh dear,

dont think sensy will be meeting us... sigh.. cant have chips with out tommy k and hellmens..... never....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"umm before a meet... keep checking my messages to see if anyone ACTUALY wants to meet us... free cuppa anyone?

Are there biscuits with that?

yes pink wafers and chocolate bonbons. and i can russle up some toast and nuttela too..

Throw in steak and chips an I'll think about it xx

ohh soapy, do ya want red sauce and hellmans with that?

)( not above bribeing someone for a meet )

Na ta but if ya could russel up some onion rings? Xx

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

cant have chips with out tommy k and hellmens..... never....

Oh.My.God.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

cant have chips with out tommy k and hellmens..... never....

Oh.My.God.

Agreed sensy xx

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By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth

cant have chips with out tommy k and hellmens..... never....

Oh.My.God.

Agreed sensy xx

ohh well sorry but my love of tommy K and hellmans is to strong to brush too one side even for you sensy and soapy...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

individually wrapped in the thinest gold leaf....then arranged over my body in a line....

Ooooh!

Do I get to keep the gold leaf?"

Typical Scot.

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

individually wrapped in the thinest gold leaf....then arranged over my body in a line....

Ooooh!

Do I get to keep the gold leaf?

Typical Scot.

I was going to roll the gold leaf up and have it turned into a piece of jewellery for you.

Emphasis in the above sentence is on the "was".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

individually wrapped in the thinest gold leaf....then arranged over my body in a line....

Ooooh!

Do I get to keep the gold leaf?

Typical Scot.

I was going to roll the gold leaf up and have it turned into a piece of jewellery for you.

Emphasis in the above sentence is on the "was".

Phew, I only wear Silver.

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

individually wrapped in the thinest gold leaf....then arranged over my body in a line....

Ooooh!

Do I get to keep the gold leaf?

Typical Scot.

I was going to roll the gold leaf up and have it turned into a piece of jewellery for you.

Emphasis in the above sentence is on the "was".

Phew, I only wear Silver."

Why, do you always come second?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

shit, shower, shave me legs, pits and bits and then panic. Brush my teeth, do my hair, make up, and get dressed. Have a drink, then deep breath, best foot forward, and go.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wonder if theyll turn up lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

individually wrapped in the thinest gold leaf....then arranged over my body in a line....

Ooooh!

Do I get to keep the gold leaf?

Typical Scot.

I was going to roll the gold leaf up and have it turned into a piece of jewellery for you.

Emphasis in the above sentence is on the "was".

Phew, I only wear Silver.

Why, do you always come second?"

Because I get so very much pleasure from watching someone else come first, and I like to take my time, plus I can make myself come wherever better than anyone else!

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

go for shower, shave all the neccesary bits and bobs, wash hair, dry hair straighten hair, doedrant, perfume, pour drink that was hard work, now do make up, decide that outfit i had choosen is no longer suitable, go through wardrobe and pick new outfit or 4 try them all on and then go back to original idea, then choose shoes/boots to wear with outfit. Last spray of perfume and im ready to go. opps back to mirror to check hair for last time now im ready to go. This really is hard work

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Ah, see I was well brought up.

The Lady always comes first.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

wow and we thought we were weird so when do we all get together lol skeaky clean primed and pruned hope the buggers turn up lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ah, see I was well brought up.

The Lady always comes first."

Perfect.... and back to the imagination methinks!

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"shave all the neccesary bits and bobs

SLIGHT concern.

When you say "all the necessary bits and bobs", do you mean "my fanny and my legs"?

If so, fine.

IF however "all the necessary bits and bobs" means things like "my right bicep" and "my forehead" I find myself, well, slightly concerned.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

prepare my model train exhibits and of course dust down the severed heads collection

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

"shave all the neccesary bits and bobs

SLIGHT concern.

When you say "all the necessary bits and bobs", do you mean "my fanny and my legs"?

If so, fine.

IF however "all the necessary bits and bobs" mean things like "my right bicep" and "my forehead" I find myself, well, slightly concerned."

yes i mean my legs, underarms and my front bum

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"shave all the neccesary bits and bobs

SLIGHT concern.

When you say "all the necessary bits and bobs", do you mean "my fanny and my legs"?

If so, fine.

IF however "all the necessary bits and bobs" mean things like "my right bicep" and "my forehead" I find myself, well, slightly concerned.

yes i mean my legs, underarms and my front bum

Thank you.

*hotlists them again*

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

"shave all the neccesary bits and bobs

SLIGHT concern.

When you say "all the necessary bits and bobs", do you mean "my fanny and my legs"?

If so, fine.

IF however "all the necessary bits and bobs" mean things like "my right bicep" and "my forehead" I find myself, well, slightly concerned.

yes i mean my legs, underarms and my front bum

Thank you.

*hotlists them again*"

Oh im on a hotlist

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Preparation for a meet consists of defluffing as needed, being spotlessly clean in body, dirtying up my mind and a coy smile that belies what is beneath.

Oh and turning up on time, I hate being late.

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By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth

"Oh im on a hotlist

you've always been on ours...

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Oh im on a hotlist

Perhaps.

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By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth

"prepare my model train exhibits and of course dust down the severed heads collection"

ohh can we put the severed heads on the trains and drive them around the track please....

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

Oh im on a hotlist

Perhaps."

now your just toying with me

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

"Oh im on a hotlist

you've always been on ours...

awww thought people would have me on hitlist quicker

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Preparation for a meet consists of defluffing as needed"

Again, and I hate to be this guy, but..

Defluffing what?

And to what extent?

Is this a "quick once over on the meet meat" or are we talking "shit I've got a meet, better get rid of the whole wolf-face thing, where's the strimmer?"

Clarification please.

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Oh im on a hotlist

Perhaps.

now your just toying with me

And a little bit of you quite likes it...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"prepare my model train exhibits and of course dust down the severed heads collection

ohh can we put the severed heads on the trains and drive them around the track please....

are u completely supid??? the severed heads mouths act as tunnels for the trains to go thru!

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

Oh im on a hotlist

Perhaps.

now your just toying with me

And a little bit of you quite likes it..."

who said that

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Oh im on a hotlist

Perhaps.

now your just toying with me

And a little bit of you quite likes it...

who said that

ME. Baby...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

just fell throught the roof getting the train set from the attic above the now broken shower think we will stay home ....... meets are such hard work lol

S&D XXXXXX

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

Oh im on a hotlist

Perhaps.

now your just toying with me

And a little bit of you quite likes it...

who said that

ME. Baby..."

I'll let you ponder on wether you are right or wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/10/11 18:40:03]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"just fell throught the roof getting the train set from the attic above the now broken shower think we will stay home ....... meets are such hard work lol

S&D XXXXXX "

come to mine .....we need more bodies

Bwaahhhahahahhaaaaa

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Preparation for a meet consists of defluffing as needed

Clarification please."

Shaving underarms and legs to just above the knee- am not hairy so no need to go higher, and Nair on my foo foo cos get ingrown hairs if I shave and they took skin when they waxed as I am a sensitive skinned little puss!

Then showered an buffed and made up (face) and hair dried and styled as needed- and thats before I decide what to wear...

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I'll let you ponder on wether you are right or wrong

I'll do that.

As you ponder whether you are or are not on my hotlist.

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

I'll let you ponder on wether you are right or wrong

I'll do that.

As you ponder whether you are or are not on my hotlist."

to late i looked at your hotlist and i'm there

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I'll let you ponder on wether you are right or wrong

I'll do that.

As you ponder whether you are or are not on my hotlist.

to late i looked at your hotlist and i'm there

Antrim huh?

I looked at your profile twice.

"to be sure to be sure"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like to perform an old Tibetan relaxation ritual consisting of deep-breathing exercises and the use of an extra large carrot, this is followed by half a dozen squat-thrusts whilst singing along to the theme from the Dambusters………

omg nearly spat me tea out at this. cant get the vision or the tune outta me head now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I am out at a BMFC party tonight so at the moment I am sitting in front of the pc completely naked and covered in moisturiser, with my hair wrapped in a towel.

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By *amschwingerzCouple
over a year ago

West

Is there an unwritten rule among swingers that they dont fuck for a couple of days before a meet..knowing full well that a guy or woman could end up licking a pussy full of stale cum?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there an unwritten rule among swingers that they dont fuck for a couple of days before a meet..knowing full well that a guy or woman could end up licking a pussy full of stale cum?"

Only if you don't wash euww

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By *DSRMan
over a year ago

leicester

"Is there an unwritten rule among swingers that they dont fuck for a couple of days before a meet..knowing full well that a guy or woman could end up licking a pussy full of stale cum?"

YUCKY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I bet alot of men have a quick tug on the old broom stick though - so they last a little longer lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reading this as I have a meet tomorrow

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