FabSwingers.com forum: Swinging NOT Dating

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

How do you fabs keep things on a "Business" level and not go into dating mode. Do you limit the number of repeat meets etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

repeat meets?

if only

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i do yes

I very rarely meet anyone more than once, mainly because i get bored of people easy and just prefer one off meets

Plus i just think things are easier that way

I have met a few guys more than once but not many

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"repeat meets?

if only

Same here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One offs are good but to get to know someone even better swing buddies with benefits if there is such a thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like most men "apparently " I can easily separate sex and emotion

Of course there is an exception ta every rule lol xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I meet quite a few same people, I think sex can get better each time the more you see someone. I just have the attitude that when I am with them it is about us. The minute I leave am back to reality, switch on, switch off. If texting or phone calls get OTT then I tend to cut off contact. The ideal meet gets it right by giving me enough attention while were apart to keep my interest but not too much to put me off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we have a few regular playmates, the thrill of meeting someone new is great, but sometimes can not work out.

so someone youve met before if a known, sometimes better, we consider them friends, and as a couple not dating but fucking friends

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"How do you fabs keep things on a "Business" level and not go into dating mode. Do you limit the number of repeat meets etc."

"Buisness"

swinging is about being able to have nsa sex,if yo cant,maybe you shouldnt!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

must admit i thought buisness was a wierd way to describe it

Makes it sound like shagging on a production line

even No Strings sex shouldnt be clinical for me

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"How do you fabs keep things on a "Business" level and not go into dating mode. Do you limit the number of repeat meets etc.

"Buisness"

swinging is about being able to have nsa sex,if yo cant,maybe you shouldnt!"

I think he means detached type of thing not paying for it.

To the OP, yes we have had repeats, we or they get in touch only when wanting to arrange another meet, if we all agree, we meet up, have fun, and it goes back to hardly any contact until the next time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it goes as far as u like it, I have some i re-meet, we dont get annoyed when the other has meets, we might attend the odd group meet. NSA means NSA

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I meet some guys often but its really never a case of more than sex... It is totally different to the sex I share with my master. Not even on the same level.

So not even sure how emotions can ever come into it. I rarely if ever talk to my playmates unless its sorting sex... Although of course we do the pleasantrys of how are you etc....

I also don't do long meets.. don't do drinks before or after.. wouldn't dream of having cuddles etc with a meet... They are there for sex not loving times.. yes some find that mechanical but I happen to love impersonal need filled dirty sex.. and it adds to it for me to be like that.. as I normally meet in groups.. again no chances..

But mostly, no one else interests me on an emotional level... And I am happy to have no contact inbetween meets...

And one of my meets I was seeing weekly for several months... It's just how I am.

Cali x

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By *ingmasterMan
over a year ago

nottingham

This is an interesting topic .

reading many of the single female profiles , they read more like a match .com profile than a swingers profile .

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"it goes as far as u like it, I have some i re-meet, we dont get annoyed when the other has meets, we might attend the odd group meet. NSA means NSA"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"it goes as far as u like it, I have some i re-meet, we dont get annoyed when the other has meets, we might attend the odd group meet. NSA means NSA

+69 _endaroos lets get married x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I meet some guys often but its really never a case of more than sex... It is totally different to the sex I share with my master. Not even on the same level.

So not even sure how emotions can ever come into it. I rarely if ever talk to my playmates unless its sorting sex... Although of course we do the pleasantrys of how are you etc....

But mostly, no one else interests me on an emotional level... And I am happy to have no contact inbetween meets...

And one of my meets I was seeing weekly for several months... It's just how I am.

Cali x "

I do understand where your coming from

i think theres a difference between swinging when your with someone and when your single

I have felt my needs have changed snce i have been single

When i was a couple certain things didnt bother me, like kissing, cuddling etc as i got that from my then husband, but i now find that since ive become single things like kissing, cuddling, sensual sex is more important as i no longer get that from a partner

Im not saying that works for everyone i just know that for me when i was a couple i felt pretty much like you, we used to have single guys over, fuck him and kick him out after lol and that was fine for me then as i could carry on after with my own fella, i couldnt do that now, my sexual needs from meets are far more demanding now im single

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"This is an interesting topic .

reading many of the single female profiles , they read more like a match .com profile than a swingers profile . "

I think there will be a difference in answers depending on wether it is a couple or female alone.

For us, we are the couple, and we don't need anything else from the meet apart from sex. If it is a new meet we do meet at the local first to make sure we get on ok.....but there is nothing wrong with other couples or females wanting a bit of socialising before their meets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never used to neet twice but wasn't getting much out of meets so figured try a previous, which will be less screening/organisation hassle and if he wants more he must've really enjoyed it. We cancelled in the humidity of last week so dunno yet.

But I keep people at arm's length anyway so not a problem for me. I'm not looking for a roommate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love the sensual side of sex although I do enjoy the wham bang on occasion. And like others have said the more you know someone the more intimate the sex is. But find it hard to actually fall asleep with someone.

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

" But find it hard to actually fall asleep with someone."

My bedside manner will cure that.

I've had one who feigned death.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I definitely think its different for couples and singles but saying that.. when I wasn't getting affections elsewhere.. I still had sex and thrown them out after...

I just don't need that to have a good time... And to be fair till I met my master I wasn't very into cuddles... Don't get me wrong I wanted them but it would then get awkward moments when guys wanted more... so I stopped.

I am very into primal sex... It's always frantic and rarely sensual... Yet when we try it other ways I often find I can't orgasm.

I can meet lots but don't get attached...

Cali x

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I think its all about the mentality of swinging and not about the amount of times you actually see someone

I have been out for meals with meets,I have cuddled fucked kissed fell asleep against,laughed,cried,been downright filthy and shared and explored many fantasies with some people

Thats swinging to me,im open,tactile and honest,and I can't be any other way,Its probably easier for me as im part of a couple,but ive seen lines blurred before with other people because the swinging brain wanders off somewhere and the dating brain slips in place,it can be confusing for some people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think its all about the mentality of swinging and not about the amount of times you actually see someone

I have been out for meals with meets,I have cuddled fucked kissed fell asleep against,laughed,cried,been downright filthy and shared and explored many fantasies with some people

eloquently put honeypot, now open ur flaps

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i dont get attached

Sex is sex and guys i meet off here are just for sex we just all like different kinds of sex

I can meet someone, have a great night loads of kissing, cuddling etc, i love falling to sleep in someones arms but its all no strings, no string cuddles lol

Soon as we part thats it, its done

Maybe some read more into than im offering

Ive had many guys ask for re meets and when ive said no they've not understood why as they felt we got on, which in most cases we did, its just that all because i spend the night with someone, cuddled and slept with them does not mean i want to meet them again

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"I think its all about the mentality of swinging and not about the amount of times you actually see someone

I have been out for meals with meets,I have cuddled fucked kissed fell asleep against,laughed,cried,been downright filthy and shared and explored many fantasies with some people

eloquently put honeypot, now open ur flaps"

FFS paddy I was being all serious then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think its all about the mentality of swinging and not about the amount of times you actually see someone

I have been out for meals with meets,I have cuddled fucked kissed fell asleep against,laughed,cried,been downright filthy and shared and explored many fantasies with some people

eloquently put honeypot, now open ur flaps

FFS paddy I was being all serious then

so was I....open em...

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Sorry.Perhaps Business not the best word to use. But meant in the meaning of business in hand,ie swinging. Didn't mean handing over cash

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By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

This is actually a very interesting thread. If you look at the answers from most of the single fems and indeed, some of the couples, they are saying that it is just sex! No attachment at all.

I remember many moons ago a thread about single guys and it asked whether guys are just a dildo with a pulse! OK different words but it meant the same... Of course everyone was very PC and said of course not, they are people..

Now here we are with the "It is just sex" and the "I only meet once" "Don't want social" and all of a sudden the playmates are back to the sex toy status!

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I prefer repeat meets but am happy with one to ones. I seem to have a button in my head that detatches me from "falling" for one of my meets. I do have feelings for the guys i see regularly, some ive known over 5 years but its a friendship/fondness feeling i have for them not a "falling in love" with them feeling. But then ive never associated sex and love they have always been two seperate things. I guess its just nice and comfortable with the guys ive known ages

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple
over a year ago

North Cornwall

Well dont know if we are odd but we are a couple who only meet together and like to keep in touch and have repeat meets. The more we get to know someone the more fun it is. As long as we are all happy why not? Have had some of our friends since we joined Fab. We dont meet them all the time although we have met the odd one or two a lot, gone to parties together and had them join in on other meets. I must admit I did wonder how I would handle it but I have found that I like having these gorgeous young guys as mates and that I have no romantic feelings whatsoever. All good so far apart from maybe one or two hiccups with guys who wanted a bit more at first but we are older and wiser now. Each to their own but the friends with benefits thing works for us most of the time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I may pop out for lunch, sometimes for a sandwich, sometimes for cock. See no difference in the two really, both satisfy me when required

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is actually a very interesting thread. If you look at the answers from most of the single fems and indeed, some of the couples, they are saying that it is just sex! No attachment at all.

Now here we are with the "It is just sex" and the "I only meet once" "Don't want social" and all of a sudden the playmates are back to the sex toy status!

i think being respectful of people in this game can be a fine line

I dont see guys i meet as dildos with a pulse, even tho the chances are i will never meet them again i still like to meet for a drink, get on with and like who im playing with i try and respect everyone i meet as a human being, manners cost nothing

but.....

at the end of the day it is just sex but that does not mean we have to loose sight of who we are, im not rude and disrespectful of people i know away from swinging so i dont treat people i meet thro swinging in such a way

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"This is actually a very interesting thread. If you look at the answers from most of the single fems and indeed, some of the couples, they are saying that it is just sex! No attachment at all.

Now here we are with the "It is just sex" and the "I only meet once" "Don't want social" and all of a sudden the playmates are back to the sex toy status!

It won't be the first time people change their mind or contradict themselves on here will it

We use the men we play with for our fun, just like the men are using us for theirs....we don't see anything wrong with that as along as we are all in agreement

Although they are a bit more than a didlo with a pulse because they speak too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is actually a very interesting thread. If you look at the answers from most of the single fems and indeed, some of the couples, they are saying that it is just sex! No attachment at all.

Now here we are with the "It is just sex" and the "I only meet once" "Don't want social" and all of a sudden the playmates are back to the sex toy status!

It won't be the first time people change their mind or contradict themselves on here will it

We use the men we play with for our fun, just like the men are using us for theirs....we don't see anything wrong with that as along as we are all in agreement

Although they are a bit more than a didlo with a pulse because they speak too

Not with a gag in their mouth they dont

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

The second they ask if your niece can go for a dress fitting .. run like fuck and don't look back.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"The second they ask if your niece can go for a dress fitting .. run like fuck and don't look back."

This has to be the most random post ever

Off to re read the thread

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"The second they ask if your niece can go for a dress fitting .. run like fuck and don't look back.

This has to be the most random post ever

Off to re read the thread

Does that mean im as daft as _iew cause i know what he means lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It won't be the first time people change their mind or contradict themselves on here will it

We use the men we play with for our fun, just like the men are using us for theirs....we don't see anything wrong with that as along as we are all in agreement

Although they are a bit more than a didlo with a pulse because they speak too

Oh I love that.. lol its kinda how we look at things.. but the dildo with a pulse is great.. lol

Sorry but it amused me... Its okay though.. I dont store my regulars under my bed in my toy crates..

cali

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

We have each other, and are very happy with that.

We like to old friends, and make new ones too, but there will never be anyone "extra" in our relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was meeting I preferred repeat meets. The way I play you build up the intensity: you don't whack a 10" dildo into a virgin arse within an hour of meeting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I see a couple of guys kinda regularly with other meets between, I love them being here.. but also love seeing them bugger off at the end of the night lol!

I don't have to 'try' not to get attached, I feel a certain amount of affection for them whilst with them...you know like with mates, but I don't give them a great deal of thought when they're not here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I see a couple of guys kinda regularly with other meets between, I love them being here.. but also love seeing them bugger off at the end of the night lol!

am a bit of a + 1 with this post. i think things hugely differ with opinions from peops in a partnership to the single femes/men posting. its easy to say when your a couple you dont want the cuddles snuggles etc because your already getting that. i too was once of a couples profile and was very much in the "have them and kick them out". but now as a single i enjoy the time spent with each meet. but once they have gone i move on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Like most men "apparently " I can easily separate sex and emotion

Of course there is an exception ta every rule lol xx

fairy comment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you fabs keep things on a "Business" level and not go into dating mode. Do you limit the number of repeat meets etc."

If you fall naturally into dating mode, don't see the problem really. There is no rule against it.

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

I prefer to meet people, men, women, couples, more then once. I find sex gets better as you become more accustomed to each other.

I enjoy a conversation, before and after sex, doesn't mean I'm in dating mode, just means I'm naturally chatty.

That said, I keep my distance emotionally, I do not want a relationship, I secure enough in my life, needs and wants to be happy swinging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whilst I have had meets that have been purely sexual with absolutely no attachment, to be honest, I prefer there to be a connection of some description. Doesn't mean that I am not clear about the difference between swinging and dating though and it doesn't mean that I want a relationship in the conventional sense. Not from my swinging meets anyway.

If I'm honest, I did fall for one guy, but frankly, I think when you're both single, it can happen and to deny that it's a possibility for me would be burying my head in the sand.

Now, I just try to stay aware of my feelings and if I ever sense that I want more than NSA then I will make sure that I come clean about it and deal with it, but it hasn't happened apart from that one time. And I would have fallen for him in whatever walk of life I'd met him in.

At the end of the day, and at the risk of inviting criticism, I swing partly because I love sex, partly because I'm exploring who I am through it, because I'm experimenting with what types of relationship can work for me and others (turning conventionality on its head), but also because I enjoy the social side, and the cuddles and the touch and the intimacy that can occur in time, even with playmates. These are basic human needs to my mind, and this is the way that I get those needs met.

Oh and hopefully there's a whole lot of laughter and pleasure for everyone involved as well!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As another single woman I feel very similar to how nawtybutnice123 seems to..

need a connection of some kind,and love the cuddles,kissing and "boyfriend experience" that I miss, being single..

I just don't want a relationship,for now anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Relationship is good if you can avoid all the expectations, possessivenesss bla bla bla

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

[Removed by poster at 12/10/11 00:39:11]

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By *unPeteMan
over a year ago

Near Bristol

[Removed by poster at 12/10/11 15:01:30]

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Since ive been with jay my attitude to meets has changed. Ive become far more mellow. I would NEVER kiss or cuddle someone it was just sex. Now i will kiss and sometimes cuddle. I think i probley was a bit cold and clinic before

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By *unPeteMan
over a year ago

Near Bristol

"How do you fabs keep things on a "Business" level and not go into dating mode. Do you limit the number of repeat meets etc."

I see nothing wrong with dating mode providing it's NSA dating mode and honest. For me the big difference between "Business" meets and dating is frequency. If I was dating I would want to meet more often that I have repeat meets through Fab.

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By *ap AdgeMan
over a year ago

Wirral

Well said. Paul xx

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"The second they ask if your niece can go for a dress fitting .. run like fuck and don't look back.

This has to be the most random post ever

Off to re read the thread

Does that mean im as daft as _iew cause i know what he means lol"

Er yes !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll carry on seeing someone until they or I don't feel like it anymore.

These things tend to fizzle out anyway as you or they meet new people.

That's always been my experience.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

It won't be the first time people change their mind or contradict themselves on here will it

We use the men we play with for our fun, just like the men are using us for theirs....we don't see anything wrong with that as along as we are all in agreement

Although they are a bit more than a didlo with a pulse because they speak too

Oh I love that.. lol its kinda how we look at things.. but the dildo with a pulse is great.. lol

Sorry but it amused me... Its okay though.. I dont store my regulars under my bed in my toy crates..

cali"

Now there is a great idea, keep your regulars in a box under the bed to use whenever it takes your fancy !!

I wonder how many will fit in if you top to tail them.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"The second they ask if your niece can go for a dress fitting .. run like fuck and don't look back.

This has to be the most random post ever

Off to re read the thread

Does that mean im as daft as _iew cause i know what he means lol

Er yes !!

Oh I get it now....duh I am

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