FabSwingers.com forum: Rejection !!!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER!

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By *inkSwingCouple
over a year ago

Preston

Feel free to pop over to the rant thread

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By *r. innocentMan
over a year ago

Oswestry

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER! "

In simple terms they're assholes!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

Because the male ego is typically incredibly fragile, and can’t take rejection at all well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

Because the male ego is typically incredibly fragile, and can’t take rejection at all well

Not just make egos! Some women, and couples egos are more flimsy than a badly made IKEA cupboard!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

Because the male ego is typically incredibly fragile, and can’t take rejection at all well

Not just make egos! Some women, and couples egos are more flimsy than a badly made IKEA cupboard!"

oh indeed! Spot on!

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By *horehouseprincessWoman
over a year ago

small town near Munich

Please let me know the answer to that question... if there is one that is. Seems to be happening a lot lately...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER! "

That's cos they are retards and can't handle been turned down I normal juat say ok nice chatting but who messages someone who "suck this" is doesn't know how to treat a lady

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them? "

Only they will know! Most likely the latter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them? "

Honestly don't see that they thought those things about you until they were rejected it then turns into a petulant teenager situation where they have to throw an insult back because they can't think of anything else to say and were hurt that you didn't want to jump into bed with them

Just let it go in one ear and out the other they really are not worth wasting a thought over!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would never say it to your face the pussys

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Human beings don't enjoy being rejected, it stings. Some will accept it gracefully, some won't.

I suspect if women were being constantly rejected the same proportion would send nasty responses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't understand why I don't get these abusive, insulting messages. I've said no thank you to hundreds of men. Possibly a thousand over the years.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Out of all the polite no thanks we have never had abuse back. I have no explanation for this or why you do other than the response you give. Who knows. Either that or they genuinely believe what they are saying. Who knows x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them?

Just let it go in one ear and out the other they really are not worth wasting a thought over!"

It doesn't bother me one bit. Lol I couldn't care less what people think of me. I just wanted to understand how do they think lol

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By *r. innocentMan
over a year ago

Oswestry

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them?

Just let it go in one ear and out the other they really are not worth wasting a thought over!"

This is so right. Not worth any time or effort.

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By *m3232Man
over a year ago

maidenhead

Clowns that’s all I can say.

The ones that have said no to me get a ok cool thanks for the reply reply.

No need to get abuseive

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I don't understand why I don't get these abusive, insulting messages. I've said no thank you to hundreds of men. Possibly a thousand over the years. "

We've only had a couple. I think it might be because we're older

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By *hatYorkLadMan
over a year ago

York

Because that's the way society is now, a lot of men are absolute dickheads! I remember in my early 20's being knocked back by girls in nightclubs when I went to talk to them (and some were quite harsh with it!) but just walking away with a red face and saying no more about it. Blokes/Lads now seem to instantly flip and go from charming to absolute bellends and call the girl every nasty insult they can think of

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By *radleywigginsMan
over a year ago

northwest

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER! "

What you perceive as a polite no thanks is still always going to be taken as a personal rejection by anyone.

Whatever you say will read as 'I don't think you're good enough looking to consider allowing you to have sex with me..'

There's no excuse for resorting to insulting someone. But (however unwittingly) you've already upset them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s just them as a person some people are just arseholes male and female.

I can garuntee it’s no reflection on you as a person. just there own in security, and shows that they are just here to satisfy their own needs.

Is there not enough shit in the world without people saying hurtful things, try to shrug it off and keep smiling there are some amazing people out there, surround yourself with the people that make you smile and feel good.

Much love

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER! "
rude

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them?

Just let it go in one ear and out the other they really are not worth wasting a thought over!

It doesn't bother me one bit. Lol I couldn't care less what people think of me. I just wanted to understand how do they think lol"

They're upset because you rejected them and are hitting back.

Don't reply to guys you aren't interested in. It's much easier that way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't understand why I don't get these abusive, insulting messages. I've said no thank you to hundreds of men. Possibly a thousand over the years.

We've only had a couple. I think it might be because we're older"

Just a stab in the dark. Curvy...whore profile names get abuse...the brain...nice couple...mr & mrs doesnt. Clue might be in the name x

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By *iversong321Woman
over a year ago

Preston/Merseyside

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them? "

You could always message them back apologising for sending the 'wrong' message to them, that was meant for another profile babe.... You would love to meet them. Then watch them flip flop like a flippy floppy thing.....arseholes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER!

That's cos they are retards and can't handle been turned down I normal juat say ok nice chatting but who messages someone who "suck this" is doesn't know how to treat a lady "

some retards behave better than them

and i hate that word

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By *agermeisterMan
over a year ago

Leeds

Many men have very large but fragile egos.

Understand this and you'll understand many men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve never had that as a response. I’ve been advised to join weightwatchers but that was an initial message.

Just block and move on. I’m sure women can be equally insulting at times.

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By *he girl with dreadlocksWoman
over a year ago

need to know basis in Wolverhampton

I was on a dating site few years back didn't fancy a guy I said no thanks and I suddenly I was just black bitch any way.

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

I have said it before, but I really don't understand why people think it's polite to send rejection messages.

Most guys won't give a fuck if they don't get a reply. They will already have messaged another ten before you reply and will have forgotten about you.

Reply, and you are saying to their face that you think they are unattractive. Some will react badly to that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We play a close game on here I guess some can’t detach them selves from the fact that it’s a swinging site there’s thousands of us in here at on time you can’t be everyone’s cup of tea no need to get your panties or boxers up in a bunch when someone says ..... Naaaaaa no thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People are sooo brave, lol, over the anonymity of the Internet. This applies to men and women. Hopefully such rudeness won’t pass into their day-to-day life away from their keyboard.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some classic White Knighting going on in the shadows there

In my view -

A proportion of guys will flirt, woo or faf anyone who they think they will have a chance with. They may well have a preferred type but when the One Eyed Trouser Snake is driving, all bets are off.

A proportion of guys will say whatever they think you want to hear, as long as it increases the likelihood of a quick game of hide the bratwurst.

A proportion of guys, when faced with rejection, cannot believe that a catch like them would ever be turned down. They then would identify any potential chinks in your armour and exploit it to cause you pain, which will in turn minimise theirs.

Some guys believe that when they read your profile, they are exactly what you are looking for, or if they aren't, they should be what you are looking for.

Butt hurt and entitlement springs to mind.

Calling them retards and idiots doesn't help, when education and understanding will help them learn their behaviour is uncalled for, disrespectful and unwelcome.

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By *r. innocentMan
over a year ago

Oswestry

"I was on a dating site few years back didn't fancy a guy I said no thanks and I suddenly I was just black bitch any way.

I have wated to message you for a long time now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was on a dating site few years back didn't fancy a guy I said no thanks and I suddenly I was just black bitch any way.

I have wated to message you for a long time now.

"
get in there

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

This is exactly the reason why my filters are so high and that I don't reply to messages from people who don't interest me. I know 95% of the guys you say thanks, but no thanks to will be perfectly civil about it.... But its that other 5% who will make you feel like shit for saying no, that prevents me from risking replying to anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is exactly the reason why my filters are so high and that I don't reply to messages from people who don't interest me. I know 95% of the guys you say thanks, but no thanks to will be perfectly civil about it.... But its that other 5% who will make you feel like shit for saying no, that prevents me from risking replying to anyone."
hey but can you not see how ridiculous that sounds you let the ignoramuses win at the expense of the gents .......such is life

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By *arry WindsorMan
over a year ago

Heaton Park Manchester

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them? "

if you give it a few months they will have forgotten all about calling you those names and will likely message again.

Then you can remind them of their actions, tell them they are retarded and exercise the block button.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you bash their egos some men turn into twats..... some guys think they are gods gift and will shag everyone they message..... but hey rejection is a bitch and some guys can't take it..... they need to grow some and grow up.

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

"This is exactly the reason why my filters are so high and that I don't reply to messages from people who don't interest me. I know 95% of the guys you say thanks, but no thanks to will be perfectly civil about it.... But its that other 5% who will make you feel like shit for saying no, that prevents me from risking replying to anyone.hey but can you not see how ridiculous that sounds you let the ignoramuses win at the expense of the gents .......such is life

Hmmm.... Do I want to risk being insulted in the most vulgar terms by replying to someone I never asked to speak to anyway and who doesn't match my preferences or interests, on the slight chance that he might be a gent and simply move on..???

Ridiculous it may seem, but how many times would you need to be bitten before you'd stop petting strange dogs in the street? Not the best comparison maybe, but you get my point.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest I've not looked into fabs policy on bullying and or abuse but that's what it is maybe if people start reporting these responses it may weadle out some of the idiots

Just a thought

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't understand why I don't get these abusive, insulting messages. I've said no thank you to hundreds of men. Possibly a thousand over the years.

We've only had a couple. I think it might be because we're older"

I was thinking older and less desirable; so they aren't so hurt when they face rejection.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The only thing I don't like about filters like for myself blocking men is swinging is about friends and you can never have too many of those male or female

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

because a lot of men think this site is instashag, so quite surprised they get turned down, then the sexual frustration kicks in and hey presto, the abuse reply

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER! "

Unfortunately that guy probably thought you were those things before he messaged you. But because sex is better than a wank, he’d have lowered his standards to message you, and then found it quite hard that someone he actually doesn’t fancy rejected him. This is the issue on a site where men out number women by 15000:1.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

Over inflated fragile Ego's, aka non-clinical narcissism. Be thankful, that they reveal themselves so soon into the message exchanges.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is the issue on a site where men out number women by 15000:1. "

Is it really, that high?

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By *unninglinguist600Man
over a year ago

belfast

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them? "

Probably because you have said no thanks. More than likely their the guys who if arrange a meet never show up. Best ignore / block and move on. A true gent on here realises not everyone gonna be everyone elses cup of tea and take it on the chin .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have learnt not participate in childish ping pong

just block

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is exactly the reason why my filters are so high and that I don't reply to messages from people who don't interest me. I know 95% of the guys you say thanks, but no thanks to will be perfectly civil about it.... But its that other 5% who will make you feel like shit for saying no, that prevents me from risking replying to anyone.hey but can you not see how ridiculous that sounds you let the ignoramuses win at the expense of the gents .......such is life

Ridiculous it may seem, but how many times would you need to be bitten before you'd stop petting strange dogs in the street? Not the best comparison maybe, but you get my point."
I got your point when you made it I just think its a shame we let the minority rule it applies in so many instances

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By *ccasionalfunCouple
over a year ago

hereandthere

seems some men hate rejection and their egos cannot stand a battering

we never had any nasty replies but we have had people ask why to a rejection, we don't even get into a convo with them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER! "

That's because they're wankers!

If you could follow them, you'll see them ranting in traffic, insulting the bar tender cos they served someone else, getting a strop on cos someone "stole" their car patking space..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I remember deleting a message by mistake and was trying to remember his username so I could message him. He was intelligent, articulate, late 40s, good looking. He messaged me again. I thought oh good only to read along the lines of 'pig ignorant'and 'social retard' and blocked. Narrow escape me thinks! As said early, the fragile male ego

Apart from that my polite no thank you usually gets thank you for your polite reply. As Nicecouple said it's an age thing

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By *iversong321Woman
over a year ago

Preston/Merseyside

"To be honest I've not looked into fabs policy on bullying and or abuse but that's what it is maybe if people start reporting these responses it may weadle out some of the idiots

Just a thought"

No point really. They just come back on a new profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/02/18 16:30:39]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"[Pointless waffle removed by poster at 08/02/18 16:30:39]"

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

"This is the issue on a site where men out number women by 15000:1.

Is it really, that high?"

No. I've done a few surveys. It's roughly

75% men

20% couples

5% women

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

"I don't understand why I don't get these abusive, insulting messages. I've said no thank you to hundreds of men. Possibly a thousand over the years.

We've only had a couple. I think it might be because we're older

Just a stab in the dark. Curvy...whore profile names get abuse...the brain...nice couple...mr & mrs doesnt. Clue might be in the name x"

I find that rather insulting. I’ve had the rude and abusive responses when I’ve politely said ‘no thanks’ or ‘not my type’. I don’t see why you’re making such a comment on soneone’s Profile name.

If guys can’t accept the rules of the site then they shouldn’t be here. We should be respectful to others and just accept it when we are turned down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't understand why I don't get these abusive, insulting messages. I've said no thank you to hundreds of men. Possibly a thousand over the years.

We've only had a couple. I think it might be because we're older

Just a stab in the dark. Curvy...whore profile names get abuse...the brain...nice couple...mr & mrs doesnt. Clue might be in the name x

If guys can’t accept the rules of the site then they shouldn’t be here. We should be respectful to others and just accept it when we are turned down.

agree and well said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I can say in all honesty say I've never sent an abusive message to anyone it's not in my nature.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Human beings don't enjoy being rejected, it stings. Some will accept it gracefully, some won't.

I suspect if women were being constantly rejected the same proportion would send nasty responses."

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER! "

Because they're not real men

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them? "

How do you reject them? What would you say?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always put at the end of my message " a deleted message is taken as no thanks".

I don't need explanations to explain your preference and if they contacted you, then obviously they didn't mean the insults, they're simply unable to cope with not getting what they want!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER!

Because they're not real men"

What?!... Do you mean they are actually women pretending to be men?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER!

Because they're not real men

What?!... Do you mean they are actually women pretending to be men?

"
or ken of ken and Barbie fame

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER! "

You've rejected them.. they're hurt and lashing out. Instead of learning and growing, adapting their behaviour, they see it as a closed door and attack.

They're just projecting their fears about themselves onto you.

I sent someone near me a message, she rejected me politely, even though I told her there was no need to reply if she wasn't attracted.

Apparently it was my beard, she's not a fan of them (wierdo

). Anyway I made a few little jokes and thanked her for replying. Was told if I got rid (is she mad?) That she'd love to meet for a Social and see.

We got talking a bit, swapped numbers and nearly met a couple of weeks ago. An unexpected death of a friend killed my mood though.

So guys... Let it be a lesson... A rejection isn't necessarily a permanent thing, nor a definate thing every time. Take it with a little humility and you may get a second chance another time, or make a new friend, which better than a shag, if youve not got many mates like Billy-no-mates here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER!

Because they're not real men

What?!... Do you mean they are actually women pretending to be men?

or ken of ken and Barbie fame

I hate those plastic types. So fake

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER!

You've rejected them.. they're hurt and lashing out. Instead of learning and growing, adapting their behaviour, they see it as a closed door and attack.

They're just projecting their fears about themselves onto you.

I sent someone near me a message, she rejected me politely, even though I told her there was no need to reply if she wasn't attracted.

Apparently it was my beard, she's not a fan of them (wierdo

). Anyway I made a few little jokes and thanked her for replying. Was told if I got rid (is she mad?) That she'd love to meet for a Social and see.

We got talking a bit, swapped numbers and nearly met a couple of weeks ago. An unexpected death of a friend killed my mood though.

Sometimes I've rejected people but then ended up chatting and got on well with them.

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By *arry WindsorMan
over a year ago

Heaton Park Manchester

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER!

Because they're not real men

What?!... Do you mean they are actually women pretending to be men?

or ken of ken and Barbie fame

Seriously you leave Ken and Barbie out of this they're one of the nicest couples I've met.

Been round to theirs several times. They don't deserve to have their names dragged through the mud like this.

No, really seriously! I DO KNOW A COUPLE and His name is KEN and Her name is BARBARA.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER!

Because they're not real men

What?!... Do you mean they are actually women pretending to be men?

or ken of ken and Barbie fame

Seriously you leave Ken and Barbie out of this they're one of the nicest couples I've met.

Been round to theirs several times. They don't deserve to have their names dragged through the mud like this.

No, really seriously! I DO KNOW A COUPLE and His name is KEN and Her name is BARBARA. "
I'm so sorry do they have a chaufeur called Jeeves

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER!

You've rejected them.. they're hurt and lashing out. Instead of learning and growing, adapting their behaviour, they see it as a closed door and attack.

They're just projecting their fears about themselves onto you.

I sent someone near me a message, she rejected me politely, even though I told her there was no need to reply if she wasn't attracted.

Apparently it was my beard, she's not a fan of them (wierdo

). Anyway I made a few little jokes and thanked her for replying. Was told if I got rid (is she mad?) That she'd love to meet for a Social and see.

We got talking a bit, swapped numbers and nearly met a couple of weeks ago. An unexpected death of a friend killed my mood though.

Sometimes I've rejected people but then ended up chatting and got on well with them.

Me too.. I try to do it politely, but honestly. I don't give a reason as it can often be hurtful, even if I don't intend it to be (which I never would).. but if someone's particularly arrogant about it.. I'll let them know, if they really want that level of truth.

I'm a single guy though, so it's not often I'm put in this predicament. I've got time to chat with someone I may not fancy, but don't dislike. Had a nice little chat last night in fact, we had some things in common even though we weren't an attraction match.

To be fair though.. most women are much more perceptive than men, more emotionally intelligent, they can usually tell before anything needs to be said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't understand why I don't get these abusive, insulting messages. I've said no thank you to hundreds of men. Possibly a thousand over the years.

We've only had a couple. I think it might be because we're older

Just a stab in the dark. Curvy...whore profile names get abuse...the brain...nice couple...mr & mrs doesnt. Clue might be in the name x

If guys can’t accept the rules of the site then they shouldn’t be here. We should be respectful to others and just accept it when we are turned down.

I was only going by the names on the thread by who did and didn't receive abuse back. No offence intented x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them?

How do you reject them? What would you say?"

I always put something like "thank you for your message but I am not interested. Enjoy fab. X"

I don't think that is rude

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

You get a certain type of men that also manage to find their way to fab and this lot are poorly endowed to form relationships and have meaningful connections with others. They're not most men, nor most men here but are a sizable chunk of people - there's not much hope for them. Learning how to spot and avoid them is a valuate skill. They are a danger to wellbeing

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By *onnie And Clyde9070Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER! "

It's the dented ego.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them?

if you give it a few months they will have forgotten all about calling you those names and will likely message again.

Then you can remind them of their actions, tell them they are retarded and exercise the block button. "

The note facility is a great tool to help as well with this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd say this is it in a nutshell. The desperation is pretty tragic in the first place, but then to embarrass himself further by getting angry and abusive... I feel embarrassed for the poor fella really.

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By *ornyDubMan25Man
over a year ago

Berlin

This kind of behaviour baffles me... Granted everyone is different but if I get a polite "no thank you" from a woman I would appreciate the fact she replied and think she is probably a nice and decent person.

From the woman's perspective I don't see why some women get upset or angry by this... It's better to just laugh and be glad your initial judgement was correct as these guys are not the type you want to meet!

The bottom line is those guys are muppets... imagine being so desperate for a shag and feeling so entitled to get abusive towards a woman when they aren't into you... must be a fragile existence!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They probably aren't that interested in the first place, just desperate. So when they get rejected they get offended. I've had both polite and harsh rejections. I would try and rationalise why people get nasty when rejecting someone who has kinda paid them a compliment but I just put it down to them being arses

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They probably aren't that interested in the first place, just desperate. So when they get rejected they get offended. I've had both polite and harsh rejections. I would try and rationalise why people get nasty when rejecting someone who has kinda paid them a compliment but I just put it down to them being arses"

If they dont fancy you thats it deal is done

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they dont fancy you thats it deal is done"
damn some are destined to purgatory they should form their own little club ' the unfancyables '

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

My advice would be not to look at deleated messages

People delete and don’t reply for all kinds of reasons

I found that as soon as I left waiting then if people wanted to reply then they did

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them?

How do you reject them? What would you say?

I always put something like "thank you for your message but I am not interested. Enjoy fab. X"

I don't think that is rude"

It's not rude. However my theory is correct again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But the thing I don't understand is do they actually mean the things they say to insult me but want to meet me because they are desperate or do they just say the insults because I rejected them?

How do you reject them? What would you say?

I always put something like "thank you for your message but I am not interested. Enjoy fab. X"

I don't think that is rude

It's not rude. However my theory is correct again."
relativity?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always? If I get a rejection I never ever insult the lady.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Always? If I get a rejection I never ever insult the lady. "
you just cry .....i know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whether I cry, wank or run down the street naked is my business ?? my coping mechanism is mine. All mine.

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

"I don't understand why I don't get these abusive, insulting messages. I've said no thank you to hundreds of men. Possibly a thousand over the years.

We've only had a couple. I think it might be because we're older

Just a stab in the dark. Curvy...whore profile names get abuse...the brain...nice couple...mr & mrs doesnt. Clue might be in the name x

If guys can’t accept the rules of the site then they shouldn’t be here. We should be respectful to others and just accept it when we are turned down.

I was only going by the names on the thread by who did and didn't receive abuse back. No offence intented x"

I’ve received abusive responses when I’ve turned people down so it’s definitely nothing to do with profile names or age. Since I’m 49 and give polite responses your comment was a sweeping statement. I think you should at least apologise to the OP for your comments.

What happened to being respectful of others?

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

Stupid wanky men

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By *entileschiWoman
over a year ago

Norwich

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER! "

I've just had one of these. Thankfully they are rare. One moment I'm Venus and the next I'm no oil painting. Dizzying.

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By *m3232Man
over a year ago

maidenhead

"Stupid wanky men

Agreed. Great pictures on your profile very sexy btw

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Here's my tuppence worth:

When men get put into the friend zone by women, she is saying, I don't mind your physical presence but, your genes should not survive another generation. There is no more fundamental judgement than that. It's the ultimate rejection.

On here, the selection process and rejection is instant. This is the only website I've seen where sexual selection is so brutally visible. Women select men. That makes them nature, cause nature is what selects. Women are the gatekeepers to reproductive success. It makes women the very definition of nature. If you think about the world in Darwinian terms, it's a struggle for survival and reproduction. Women are picky and evaluate men for their fitness. The deleted messages on here are telling men they are not worthy. Lots of men have no sexual partners and they have no children, that's not the case with women. Almost all women have one child. Most men are not in control of the selection process, and their fragile ego's can't handle it. Most of the angry/entitled types on here, are probably not even aware of what is going on.

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By *igga_manMan
over a year ago

near Reading

"99% of the time I don't understand men. And today is one of them days.

Why do guys always come out with insults whenever they get a polite no thank you?

A lot of the time when I say no to a guy I get a nasty reply along the lines of "you are fat and ugly anyway"

If I'm fat and ugly why message me and ask for a meet then!!

Can anyone explain men behaving that way?

RANT OVER! "

Mindless idiots. But having looked at your profile.....wow

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't understand why I don't get these abusive, insulting messages. I've said no thank you to hundreds of men. Possibly a thousand over the years.

We've only had a couple. I think it might be because we're older

Just a stab in the dark. Curvy...whore profile names get abuse...the brain...nice couple...mr & mrs doesnt. Clue might be in the name x

If guys can’t accept the rules of the site then they shouldn’t be here. We should be respectful to others and just accept it when we are turned down.

I was only going by the names on the thread by who did and didn't receive abuse back. No offence intented x

What happened to being respectful of others?

You know your right. I have had a closer look and I don't think it's got anything to do with the profile name x

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By *ilk_TrayMan
over a year ago

Hampshire

A lady viewed my profile twice.

So I send her a wink and a message with clear face pics.

The result? She blocks me.

But that’s fine

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By *akey005Man
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

I do find a simple message stating they are uninterested better than a flat out delete of message far more polite but there is no way I'd resort to insults I mean I insulted every time I had no reply/rejected I'd be a millionaire

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

So last night I blocked two guys for not accepting a polite ‘no thanks’.

I don’t need to explain to them my reasons. Just wish they’d accept my decision and move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do find a simple message stating they are uninterested better than a flat out delete of message far more polite but there is no way I'd resort to insults I mean I insulted every time I had no reply/rejected I'd be a millionaire

when you have a inbox of many messages and when you do say no, and get more messages with why back.

your dammmed if u do and dammed if you dont

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So last night I blocked two guys for not accepting a polite ‘no thanks’.

I don’t need to explain to them my reasons. Just wish they’d accept my decision and move on. "

yep same here with blocking

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