FabSwingers.com forum: Love thyself

By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hide in a cave where others can't see me..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've allowed myself to love someone else, it's been great for my wellbeing

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I've allowed myself to love someone else, it's been great for my wellbeing "

I saw your post, sounds fabulous!

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Hide in a cave where others can't see me.."

Aww, is that really loving yourself though?

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Hmm good question,I need to think about that one...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

Try to understand myself better. Try to forgive myself. Try to treat myself gently.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't at the moment but I intend to make time for me, do the things I enjoy doing (woodworking for example) and switching off from trying to please others.

I also intend to acknowledge that I'm awesome in my own way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I make a conscious effort to forgive myself. If things have been worrying me or I feel like I've done something stupid or made a wrong choice.

I give myself time to think it over then I move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I go out on my paddle board, or go for a swim, or walk the dog. I love being out on/in/near water and just being able to clear my mind.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/02/18 17:15:30]

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

Try to understand myself better. Try to forgive myself. Try to treat myself gently.

Ah yes, I guess trying to understand oneself better can be loving oneself in a way.... I just had that one listed under FUN!!

#psychologyaddict

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I make a conscious effort to forgive myself. If things have been worrying me or I feel like I've done something stupid or made a wrong choice.

I give myself time to think it over then I move on. "

What do you struggle to forgive yourself?? Understanding yourself may be helpful to you there...?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I acknowledge my great Aussie attitude, I practice daily to maintain my flexibility physically and mentally, I ensure I keep understanding others and promote my sense of fun....by embracing everything that crosses my path .... what do you think darling?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suffer from malignant narcissism, so just drawing breath is enough for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do on a daily basis

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I thought you were being literal and this was going to be a thread about masturbation. I'm a little disappointed, if I'm honest...

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I acknowledge my great Aussie attitude, I practice daily to maintain my flexibility physically and mentally, I ensure I keep understanding others and promote my sense of fun....by embracing everything that crosses my path .... what do you think darling? "

I like 'embracing everything that crosses my path'. It reminds me of Eckhart Tolle who teaches about acceptance and surrender - I'm not into his teaching per se, but I know I would benefit from being better at this!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0D7CebGgvFA

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I thought you were being literal and this was going to be a thread about masturbation. I'm a little disappointed, if I'm honest...

Oh we're all being deep today, sorry, we'll get back to wanking later in the week!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reflect, learn, smile...simple

Wanking patterns available on request

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not very good at loving myself, so I surrounding myself with people who do love me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

Try to understand myself better. Try to forgive myself. Try to treat myself gently.

Ah yes, I guess trying to understand oneself better can be loving oneself in a way.... I just had that one listed under FUN!!

#psychologyaddict"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Make time to exercise, play my music, be with friends and family I love. Be more, do less. Make love more often.

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By *ilmissplumpyWoman
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

What a blooming good question....

I don't think i've ever loved myself very much until very recently.

Years ago i didn't particularly like my life, my body.... Completely changed my life & the body is an ongoing project.

I love myself now by acknowledging when i look good & by actually taking compliments off people without batting them back with a daft response to avert attention....

I guess i started being selfish and giving time to myself....

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I'm not very good at loving myself, so I surrounding myself with people who do love me. "

Other people's love can teach us.

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

[Removed by poster at 05/02/18 17:51:51]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

"
blue tack myself to mirror

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"What a blooming good question....

I don't think i've ever loved myself very much until very recently.

Years ago i didn't particularly like my life, my body.... Completely changed my life & the body is an ongoing project.

I love myself now by acknowledging when i look good & by actually taking compliments off people without batting them back with a daft response to avert attention....

I guess i started being selfish and giving time to myself...."

Yes, for some people the most important lesson is learning to say no to other people, to set boundaries, to give yourself priority.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t, it’s something I’m not good at at all. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Posh wank

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By *irestorm 500Couple
over a year ago

coventry

"I don’t, it’s something I’m not good at at all. X "

Sounds like me , its something i find really difficult to do x storm x

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I don’t, it’s something I’m not good at at all. X

Sounds like me , its something i find really difficult to do x storm x"

Why do you both think that is, would you both care to share?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t, it’s something I’m not good at at all. X

Sounds like me , its something i find really difficult to do x storm x"

It’s very difficult when what you see in the mirror makes you sad x

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

"Make time to exercise, play my music, be with friends and family I love. Be more, do less. Make love more often."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Eurgh... this is a toughie!

I guess when I take myself off to the sea and forget the rest of the world, I am allowing myself some proper me time. Does that count?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Headphones on, music on loud, block out the world

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/02/18 18:17:54]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

"I don't

Me neither

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I eat my greens.

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

"Eurgh... this is a toughie!

I guess when I take myself off to the sea and forget the rest of the world, I am allowing myself some proper me time. Does that count?"

It's the happy place that counts xx

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Eurgh... this is a toughie!

I guess when I take myself off to the sea and forget the rest of the world, I am allowing myself some proper me time. Does that count?"

Oh yes, me time is very important, as is physical exercise I think - we all need our natural cannabinoids!!

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I don’t, it’s something I’m not good at at all. X

Sounds like me , its something i find really difficult to do x storm x

It’s very difficult when what you see in the mirror makes you sad x

Yes, but can you love the inner you all the more maybe??

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By *eliz NelsonMan
over a year ago

The Tantric Tea Shop

If I am walking around completely oblivious to my surroundings, I am content in myself

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I eat my greens."

Eating what your body needs is important. I fail miserably at NOT eating what my body doesn't need!!!

#thestickytoffeepuddingandcustardwaslovelythough

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t, it’s something I’m not good at at all. X

Sounds like me , its something i find really difficult to do x storm x

It’s very difficult when what you see in the mirror makes you sad x

Yes, but can you love the inner you all the more maybe??"

Yes, the inner me is a nice loving person. Perhaps I should learn to like her a lot more x

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By *irestorm 500Couple
over a year ago

coventry

"I don’t, it’s something I’m not good at at all. X

Sounds like me , its something i find really difficult to do x storm x

It’s very difficult when what you see in the mirror makes you sad x

Yes, but can you love the inner you all the more maybe??

Yes, the inner me is a nice loving person. Perhaps I should learn to like her a lot more x "

If you do so will I..you appear to be a lovely lady so see her x storm x

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

Walk miles, run a bit and sometimes treat myself to apple pie and cream.x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Eurgh... this is a toughie!

I guess when I take myself off to the sea and forget the rest of the world, I am allowing myself some proper me time. Does that count?

It's the happy place that counts xx

The best happy place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Eurgh... this is a toughie!

I guess when I take myself off to the sea and forget the rest of the world, I am allowing myself some proper me time. Does that count?

Oh yes, me time is very important, as is physical exercise I think - we all need our natural cannabinoids!!

Feel good natural exercise highs help too for sure

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

\o/

I'm not overly good at this, I tend to look after others before myself.

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

In reality it would feel a bit conceited in my book.

Its hard enough to grab time for myself nowadays.

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"\o/

I'm not overly good at this, I tend to look after others before myself.

Yes, but that ought not go on forever.....

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"In reality it would feel a bit conceited in my book.

It should not, if it is the right kind of loving yourself - that is essential we are told.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hide in a cave where others can't see me..

Aww, is that really loving yourself though?"

Maybe it's more protecting myself.

But sometimes I have that need for quiet peace an escape from the world and all its madness and a place where I can just be....almost a sanctuary of sorts

I'm content with my own company much of the time and removing myself from the world human contact all its frantic madnesses and just sitting dreaming thinking not thinking and allowing that peace to sink deep into me and surround me is sometimes all I need.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

"\o/

I'm not overly good at this, I tend to look after others before myself.

Yes, but that ought not go on forever....."

I'm sure my time will come

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Hide in a cave where others can't see me..

Aww, is that really loving yourself though?

Maybe it's more protecting myself.

But sometimes I have that need for quiet peace an escape from the world and all its madness and a place where I can just be....almost a sanctuary of sorts

Well that sounds far more nurturing. Escaping from that which drains us can be a positive choice rather than a 'running away'.

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

"In reality it would feel a bit conceited in my book.

It should not, if it is the right kind of loving yourself - that is essential we are told."

What you all see on here are just images of me, those we meet get to know who we are, that gives us both a good feeling and is special so I suppose we could count that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t, it’s something I’m not good at at all. X

Sounds like me , its something i find really difficult to do x storm x

It’s very difficult when what you see in the mirror makes you sad x

Yes, but can you love the inner you all the more maybe??

Yes, the inner me is a nice loving person. Perhaps I should learn to like her a lot more x

If you do so will I..you appear to be a lovely lady so see her x storm x"

We should try together. Thank you storm x

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"In reality it would feel a bit conceited in my book.

It should not, if it is the right kind of loving yourself - that is essential we are told.

What you all see on here are just images of me, those we meet get to know who we are, that gives us both a good feeling and is special so I suppose we could count that."

That's external affirmation - they say we all need to be able to affirm ourselves too, and that's trickier for most of us I think, no-one ever really teaches you to do that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

I do something every day that makes my soul happy. Whether that's a simple, indulgent cup of tea, a beauty treatment, reading, visiting somewhere, or even listening to music. I always make time for me. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

Try to understand myself better. Try to forgive myself. Try to treat myself gently.

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

Ah, nurture the soul rather than the ego - that's a very important point!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

Ah, nurture the soul rather than the ego - that's a very important point!!!

"
its all about the ego here though

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

Ah, nurture the soul rather than the ego - that's a very important point!!!

its all about the ego here though

Exactly. And this can be a damaging place because of it, we need to learn to guard and nurture our souls maybe.

"What is good for the ego is toxic to the soul"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

No idea, it just comes naturally.

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

No idea, it just comes naturally.

Narcissist! !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

No idea, it just comes naturally.

Narcissist! !

Oh Echo, do you burn with a closer flame?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take time.out to walk in the beautiful countryside here. Find some where peaceful to sit and let the world spin with out me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

being happy with yourself is important and until you are happy with you, you cant be happy with anyone else

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm extremely hard on myself. I expect to work to the best of my ability, be a really good, loyal friend, and train as much as possible. And I look after myself as well. I eat well, I've stopped drinking and I don't smoke anymore. I spoil myself sometimes too - I'm having a spa in a couple of weeks. All in all I treat myself as I would if I were my own daughter, if that doesn't sound too weird. Either way, it works for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Look in the mirror.

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

No idea, it just comes naturally.

Narcissist! !

Oh Echo, do you burn with a closer flame?

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Look in the mirror. "

That's the ego lol, it's your soul that needs loving!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get more ink done

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mindfulness has been key in growing to appreciate and love oneself. Having mindfulness at the forefront of my thoughts allows space to consider ones reactions to others and to oneself. Breathing techniques and rescue breaths help me deal with inward and outward negativity. That and reaching an age where I don't give a rats arse what people think of me and my actions!

Peach x

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Mindfulness has been key in growing to appreciate and love oneself. Having mindfulness at the forefront of my thoughts allows space to consider ones reactions to others and to oneself. Breathing techniques and rescue breaths help me deal with inward and outward negativity. That and reaching an age where I don't give a rats arse what people think of me and my actions! "

Oh yes, that is true freedom, I wish everyone could have that, in a good way!! I actually delight in being a non-conformist sometimes.

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

?????

Apart from the obvious.

I don't no ???

How dus one love them self ?

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

I stand in front of a mirror and scream at myself;

'YOU ARE A TIGERRRRR!!!'

Then I roar and do claw shapes with my hands

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

I stand in front of a mirror and scream at myself;

'YOU ARE A TIGERRRRR!!!'

Then I roar and do claw shapes with my hands

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

?????

Apart from the obvious.

I don't no ???

How dus one love them self ?

Some good thoughts on this thread Seeside - you know I think it varies for each person, you start from where you are. It's partly about looking after yourself, doing nice things for yourself that make you feel good, but it's largely about how you FEEL towards yourself, your inner attitudes etc. That affects how you behave and relate to other people too, the boundaries you set for how they treat you, how much you give others or yourself priority in your life.

I think if you have good self-esteem it's easier to love yourself, but they are not the same thing. They call it 'The greatest love of all' but I am not sure I would say that of my self-love, so maybe we all have more to learn on this? Food for thought.

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By *risky_Mare OP Woman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

Here's part of what looks to be a very interesting article on the subject by Jason Connell called 'Loving yourself is really fucking hard':

THE FOUR LEVELS OF SELF-LOVE: AN OVERVIEW

Think of your relationship to yourself in four levels:

Level 1: the day-to-day. Do you treat yourself like an important person who deserves love and respect, or are you subtly placing unreasonable expectations on yourself? What do your behaviors say about your relationship to yourself?

If you do not treat yourself as you would treat someone you love, you’ll never feel the love that flows from your core.

Level 2: embrace your dark side. Do you accept and acknowledge your dark side when it surfaces? Do you embrace the part of you that is pessimistic, lazy, depressed, violent, crude and offensive? Or do you pretend that everything is rainbows, gumdrops, and unicorn shits. Do you pretend that every day is a good day?

To be human is to be stormy and tempestuous one day (or moment), and then calm and sunny the next. To pretend otherwise is to deny who you truly are, and denying your truth is an act of self-loathing.

Level 3: the deep work. Have you truly seen yourself for who you are? Can you grasp that your imperfections are what make you perfect? Have you owned the reality that life was inflicted upon you without asking and with it came trauma, abuse, disappointment and eventually death? Do you acknowledge that these struggles will forever shape your life until you confront them and begin the healing process?

One of the most beautiful truths about the human experience is that it’s never too late to become the man or woman you truly are. You can begin healing, growing, and flourishing now. Doing so requires the courage and clarity to see yourself, so that you may begin the process of tearing down the walls that protect your heart.

As you do this you will open to the flow of love and life around you.

Level 4: the highest form of love. Every single person was born with unique gifts. The gifts can be anything from athletic performance, to empathy, to humor, to spirituality, to business acumen, and everything in between.

The real work of learning to love yourself is learning to see who you truly are and accepting it all. Along the path, you’ll discover deep gifts that you were born with.

The highest expression of love for yourself and the world is sharing those gifts freely and abundantly.

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

"So what do you do to 'love yourself'??

?????

Apart from the obvious.

I don't no ???

How dus one love them self ?

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

"Here's part of what looks to be a very interesting article on the subject by Jason Connell called 'Loving yourself is really fucking hard':

THE FOUR LEVELS OF SELF-LOVE: AN OVERVIEW

Think of your relationship to yourself in four levels:

If you do not treat yourself as you would treat someone you love, you’ll never feel the love that flows from your core.

As you do this you will open to the flow of love and life around you.

The real work of learning to love yourself is learning to see who you truly are and accepting it all. Along the path, you’ll discover deep gifts that you were born with.

The highest expression of love for yourself and the world is sharing those gifts freely and abundantly."

Level 1

i do dayley as i treet others in a nice way as i wood like to be

Level 2

No way am i letting out and embraceing my dark side as its darker than the colour black.

Level 3

Just sounds like a regular day

Level 4

I think ive dun allredey

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

"Headphones on, music on loud, block out the world

Dance with yourself daily

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