FabSwingers.com forum: A quick question for you ladies

By *untimes surrey OP Man
over a year ago

guildford

Hi I was just wondering is it creepy or sexy if a guy sends an erotic naughty message as a first message.as I like to send them sometimes and wouldn't want to creep anyone out.

Just not sure if it's the right thing to do.as it's often hard to get replies as you all get inundated by us guys.

Any tips on the best way to get your attention girls would be appreciated.

Now wait for the guys to slag me off.

But look to see any replies.cheers all.

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By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth

Not exactly creepy but it's not fully appreciated by many people going by previous threads. For me it's just too full on - you don't know what I like yet and you wouldn't even walk up to someone in the bar of a club and just start sticking your dick in their mouth so why would you do it in writing? (different context perhaps in play rooms depending on what's going on!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What you consider 'erotic', others may not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Id delete in all honesty

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

I can only speak for me and I wouldnt appreciate one

Just a normal message,showing that my profile has been looked at is fine..

Miss

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By *he Regina PhalangeWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

I’d delete and block you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd ignore it

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

It's a case of knowing your audience really and you can't in a first message.

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

Delete and block.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

It's not something I like no.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I find it presumptuous and rude. You tell me you're going to do all this stuff to me and haven't even said "hi yet.

Yes this is a swingers site, yes we are looking to meet people for sex, but one still needs to make an effort to woo a woman a bit.

For me it's a delete and block

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By *ittlemissfriskyWoman
over a year ago

I’d delete

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By *iversong321Woman
over a year ago

Preston/Merseyside

Instant delete and

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I'd read it and probably

tbh.

As others have said your idea of erotic might differ from mine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi I was just wondering is it creepy or sexy if a guy sends an erotic naughty message as a first message.as I like to send them sometimes and wouldn't want to creep anyone out.

Just not sure if it's the right thing to do.as it's often hard to get replies as you all get inundated by us guys.

Any tips on the best way to get your attention girls would be appreciated.

Now wait for the guys to slag me off.

But look to see any replies.cheers all."

I wouldn't reply, I like an opening message to be humorous and and introduction...

When I get those kind of opening messages they get deleted straight away

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By *issy louWoman
over a year ago

Staffordshire Moorlands

Sorry, I would delete - after pissing myself laughing! What you think is erotic probably doesn’t seem erotic when a lady reads it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can only speak for me and I wouldnt appreciate one

Just a normal message,showing that my profile has been looked at is fine..

Miss"

?? this x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think most of us ladies have had these over the course of time, unless it’s actually written on your profile saying this is welcome, I wouldn’t start your first message with this kind of opener, I would start reading and then block.

Geeky x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't read it. I find it impersonal, you've probably sent the same thing to hundreds of girls.

You don't know me or what I like so it's probably not gonna be to my taste and also it's not exactly a conversation starter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I start to read messages like that from random people and think my god, they don't know anything about me, my likes etc.

Delete button every time.

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"Hi I was just wondering is it creepy or sexy if a guy sends an erotic naughty message as a first message.as I like to send them sometimes and wouldn't want to creep anyone out.."

It would make me cringe to be honest. Rapidly followed by a delete and block.

Sorry, but I doubt that approach would work for many women.

Nita

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

OP, if you like you can send me a message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I want to read erotica I buy a book.

Receiving a message of what a man wants to do to me has zero effect.

I wouldn't read it.

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By *eanut Butter CupWoman
over a year ago

B & M Bargains

I read them, just to

at how many times they believe they can make me cum in their fantasy then I delete. Worse type of message IMO!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OP, if you like you can send me a message

I was just about to say the same. Trial it for him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Instant delete. I wouldn't even read past the first line

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By *untimes surrey OP Man
over a year ago

guildford

Thanks for all your comments much appreciated.a big kiss n hug to you all .x

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

Honestly? I have received a few of these in my time on fab and they make me do a proper real life eye roll because they are invariably written in the second person narrative and none of it rings true. This isn't a real example but you get the gist:

"You are sat at a hotel bar on your own" (as if I'm ever in a hotel bar on my own, which has happened about twice in my life and then I had a book on me and was waiting for someone I know)

"You're looking demure but sexy in a blouse, pencil skirt and high-heels after work" (Just no. I have never worn that outfit. It's so not me. And definitely not to work; it's totally unworkable with my job even if I did want to dress like that and wouldn't look ridiculous in it)

Then there's always me wearing a thong mentioned. Or me being sexually aggressive. And various other things that just plain aren't me.

And so it goes on. Written (or copied and pasted) to me as a fantasy woman when someone has got pretty much every detail about me wrong. It's the lack of verisimilitude that puts me off; there is good erotica out there if I want to read it - and I can choose to read stuff where I can easily put myself in the female protagonist's shoes or in a situation I actually find titillating.

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

When I read your post my face screwed up.

I don’t like an overtly graphic message from a total stranger. It may be all about casual sex but I still want a connection and how could you possibly know what floats my boat without talking to me first?

Everyone is different though so one size definitely does not fit all.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"Thanks for all your comments much appreciated.a big kiss n hug to you all .x

You look nice enough to not have to mess about with those messages any way

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"When I read your post my face screwed up.

You're back?

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"When I read your post my face screwed up.

You're back?

They let me out early for good behaviour!

Hello!

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

The 'I knock on your door and you open it dressed in sexy lingerie, I take you by the hand and lead you into your living room, whilst I slowly unleash my big throbbing cock, and your eyes widen with delight at the thought of it.......'

Fucking tosh! Do not send these as a first, second or third message! Unless you know the person wants to receive this shit, leave it as your back up word document to copy and paste when you are truly desperate and just trying the scatter gun approach

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"When I read your post my face screwed up.

You're back?

They let me out early for good behaviour!

Hello!

Oh good

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"The 'I knock on your door and you open it dressed in sexy lingerie, I take you by the hand and lead you into your living room, whilst I slowly unleash my big throbbing cock, and your eyes widen with delight at the thought of it.......'"

I seem to get led upstairs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get ‘erotic stories’ sent to me every day.

I assume it’s typed one handed.

I just delete.

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

I seem to get led upstairs

I always get bent over the sofa and my pussy juices are running down my legs just at the anticipation of his big throbbing cock and how good it will feel inside me.....'

And it always fucking leads to anal which I don't do

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By *iversong321Woman
over a year ago

Preston/Merseyside

I seem to get led upstairs

Oh you must be classy. I never make it past the front porch.

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By *ittlemisssassypantsCouple
over a year ago

South East Wales

Not the best choice of opening message, if I'm honest. It's a smidge creepy...

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

"OP, if you like you can send me a message

I was just about to say the same. Trial it for him

I'm still waiting btw

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d delete and block. You wouldn’t come up to me in a bar, or any other public place, and greet me like that.

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By *he Devils Daughter!Woman
over a year ago

some where in yorkshire

I delete them find it cringeworthy n certainly not a turn off off some random guy.

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"I’d delete and block. You wouldn’t come up to me in a bar, or any other public place, and greet me like that. "

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d delete and block. You wouldn’t come up to me in a bar, or any other public place, and greet me like that.

This

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

It's not my ideal first message - find out first if there maybe some attraction. At some point I expect to have some flirting etc but there's no rush

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