FabSwingers.com forum: Malicious gossip

By *ruit OP Woman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Over the weekend I had a couple of calls from ladies after having heard gossip involving me and them. I explained what is happening currently about malicious calls I have been getting but am gob smacked that people will actually spread rumours about people that they dont even know.

Have other people experienced this especially with the nature of this site?

I am a pretty honest lady and like to always see the best in other people when maybe I shouldnt. But to spread rumours about people you have never met is pretty bad.

Have people experienced rumour spreading/backstabbing after saying no to meeting people on swing sites?

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Have people experienced rumour spreading/backstabbing after saying no to meeting people on swing sites?"

Not really from saying 'no' to a meet.... I find it's more common for it to come from other women... well I say women but on the maturity front I am not so sure they qualify.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People talk, that's why I love attending social events.

However, I have not come across anyone who deliberately spread malicious gossips about other people.

Besides, I never take the words of one person and treat them as gospel, and would always keep an open mind about a person until I have amassed sufficient information and evidence to form and informed opinion about him/her myself.

As for telling tales, men are just as bad as women IMHO, some are worse than women!

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Over the weekend I had a couple of calls from ladies after having heard gossip involving me and them. I explained what is happening currently about malicious calls I have been getting but am gob smacked that people will actually spread rumours about people that they dont even know.

Have other people experienced this especially with the nature of this site?

I am a pretty honest lady and like to always see the best in other people when maybe I shouldnt. But to spread rumours about people you have never met is pretty bad.

Have people experienced rumour spreading/backstabbing after saying no to meeting people on swing sites?"

Too much time, not enough life and no brains at all.

That's the women doing the gossiping and in that I include the women who told you.

Before that you didn't have the angst of it.

Did any of them have the balls to tell the other women to stop gossiping?

Did any of them have the backbone to be a shoulder and not a mouth ?

Seems not.

People gossip. In work I have witnessed character asassinations and the gossips prosper and rise. It's a tool. Bear in mind whoever told you what was said will say they do it in your best interests but really they haven't stopped to think. They give themselves moral high ground by saying they are doing it for you. In reality they bask and grow by being the 'important' one for ten minutes. They get to feel glorious. Give me the friend who can keep their mouth shut. That is a true friend.

I don't get to hear gossip about me but i'm sure it must go on.

The way I see it is - When someone is filling your ear about someone else you know EXACTLY what they are doing to you when they are not with you.

There may be times when you need to warn friends but most of the time it's trivial shit that shouldn't be given oxygen.

Most gossip stems from the insecurities and the desparation to seem important, of the gossiper. They have no love, they crave attention and seek the adulation of anyone who will listen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you'll get it from the keyboard warriors who can only "talk the talk"

We had a really bad one on another site because we were not quick enough arranging a meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes! Over the last year I have heard various gossip about myself, some of it hilarious but some not very nice stuff.

I started to get really upset about it and debated leaving the site but i realised that is probably what they wanted!

What the gossip/sh*t stirrer didnt realise was that one person they spoke to was a very good friend of mine!

In my case the gossiper was a guy that i met once and i declined a second meet.... I didnt realise it would cause him to react that way but very glad that it was only the one meet.

People are always telling me things about others on here which i find terrible but there will always be people who gossip. I just try and ignore it now and i wont let them win.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gossip is awful here in rural Wales so God knows what is said about us

, some time back I had a lung problem and for a while was unable to move very well about the home, so kept the drive gates cloased so we would not have visitors when I was on my own here.

Rumour in the village was that I had died

What we tend to do with gossipers is feed them what they want to hear, i.e. the biggest load of shit we can think up at the time......job done

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do not like to entertain from home as I live in a small cul-de-sac with young children about.

Although the adults may not gossip, children being children and naturally inquisitive, they would ask questions.

After a domestic incident, my late partner was escorted by the police to my house to retrieve his belongings.

We made up a few days later.

Apparently one of my next door neighbours' kids asked him one day why he was escorted by the police etc., so he informed him/her he had been a bad person and was unkind to me.

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By *ruit OP Woman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Horny I think mine is a man that i either declined a first meet or second. The ladies phoning me had been either given my number as the woman sleeping with her partner(load of twaddle)but with the information I gave her of the malicious phonecalls I have been getting(police involved) I think she realised I was being honest.

It amazes me that a no thanks can cause so much hastle sometimes.

One of the ladies I spoke to has also been getting some problem phonecalls so recon its all connected and even the same man.

Am hoping it all get sorted and the sick people of this world actually stop. pigs may fly but o well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I believe the green eyed monster called jealousy has a lot to do with malicious gossips.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Horny I think mine is a man that i either declined a first meet or second. The ladies phoning me had been either given my number as the woman sleeping with her partner(load of twaddle)but with the information I gave her of the malicious phonecalls I have been getting(police involved) I think she realised I was being honest.

It amazes me that a no thanks can cause so much hastle sometimes.

One of the ladies I spoke to has also been getting some problem phonecalls so recon its all connected and even the same man.

Am hoping it all get sorted and the sick people of this world actually stop. pigs may fly but o well."

typical of a certain type of person, in this case a fella, must have been a brat as a child and obviosly has not grown up so feels the need to throw his toys out of the cot. Some people are just not used to "no" and cause all sorts of problems to make them feel better

Hope it all gets sorted for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I believe the green eyed monster called jealousy has a lot to do with malicious gossips.

very true and what they don't know they make up

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By *ruit OP Woman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

If someone says a no thanks then that should be it but understand that alot of people cant take that.

I think in my case it is all coming from one person but hopefully the police will sort it along with the calls.

Fingers crossed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately for a period earlier on this year I was contacted by a few very good friends of mine who had heard about gossip and rumours that were being circulated about me.

Some pretty harmless petty stuff, others much more sinister.

Those who I believed and was later confirmed that were responsible were 1 person who I wouldn't verify because we didn't click in the bedroom - I personally wouldn't lie and verify someone if hadn't anything positive about the experience to say. And the other turned out to be one of the 'friends' who'd informed me of things they had heard in the first place!

Theirs it has now transpired to be a jealoust issue.

Thankfully I'm proud to say I maintained a dignified silence and didn't respond by bitching back etc. I simply held my head high and proved that what had been said was rubbish! Those true friends and those who really knew me, supported me 100% and stood by me. Eventually because they didn't get and still will not get the reaction they want from me they've stopped and given up. And hopefully crawled back under the rock they originated from!

It was certainly not a nice experience, but let's hope that its over with now

XxLouisexX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Unfortunately for a period earlier on this year I was contacted by a few very good friends of mine who had heard about gossip and rumours that were being circulated about me.

Some pretty harmless petty stuff, others much more sinister.

Theirs it has now transpired to be a jealoust issue.

It was certainly not a nice experience, but let's hope that its over with now

XxLouisexX"

yes it's at times like that when you find out who your real friends are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It amazes me that a no thanks can cause so much hastle sometimes.

One of the ladies I spoke to has also been getting some problem phonecalls so recon its all connected and even the same man.

Am hoping it all get sorted and the sick people of this world actually stop. pigs may fly but o well."

At first i couldnt believe that someone could be so malicious but i guess the male ego is a fragile thing!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 25/09/11 11:27:05]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I believe in letting other people dig holes for themselves, as I find gossip spreaders are often liars themselves, and often not very good at covering or remember the lies they have told.

I don't like to tell tales or lies, this way, I do not have to remember what lies or tales I have told.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I believe in letting other people dig holes for themselves, as I find gossip spreaders are often liars themselves, and often not very good at covering or remember the lies they have told.

I don't like to tell tales or lies, this way, I do not have to remember what lies or tales I have told.

bravo!!! we like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It amazes me that a no thanks can cause so much hastle sometimes.

One of the ladies I spoke to has also been getting some problem phonecalls so recon its all connected and even the same man.

Am hoping it all get sorted and the sick people of this world actually stop. pigs may fly but o well.

At first i couldnt believe that someone could be so malicious but i guess the male ego is a fragile thing!"

seriously so for some

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I have been lied about but luckily the person they were talking is also a friend of mine so knew the truth and my verification shows what date we had met so that also backed me up and proved them wrong

I could guess that those that didn't like my response have also spread lies about me but to be honest I don't care and haven't lost any sleep over it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh yes and there are always two sides to a story

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Ok as this is only a one sided view and about another member then I am shutting this especially as it brings other people to post about their experiences of people on the site too.

Someone said "hopefully it will stop" Sadly it won't if it is talked about.

REPORT anything that happens on the site to Admin.

Anything off the site report to the relevant authorities.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It amazes me that people take swinging so seriously and would indulge in anti social behaviour just because of recreational sex. Making malicious phone calls, spreading gossip, looking at peoples verifications and messaging others on that list to spread malicious gossip, contacting employers outing people, making up various fake profiles to spread gossip and make trouble. For the people who do this, I really do think that perhaps swinging has got a bit much for you. That it has affected you mentally and has overtaken your real life. It should never get to this point - its only a hobby.

Of course jealousy over others is commonplace and as long as it stays fairly innocent and contained within the site then it doesnt bother me. I agree with the quote 'there is no such thing as bad publicity' on this site. If someone is bad mouthing you to others, then at least you have affected them, and as this is all about standing out, then its all good and they are doing you a favour by bringing up your name. Thats how you need to look at it.

Deliberately badmouthing with intent to cause maximum harm to that person, all in the name of a silly little hobby, well those people arent really intelligent enough and mature enough to indugle I feel

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