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Speed up that divorce...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Well here’s the follow up to the other thread!

https://m.fabswingers.com/forum/lounge/710595

Having been a fan of the essay and experiment’s 36 questions that one psychologist says can lead to love, when I read this it had me chortling!

So here for your pleasure is the alternative take. It will obviously make more sense if you have read the other thread, but it’s fun nonetheless!

This one is the reverse, not how to accelerate falling in love but ...divorce!

First, grab someone you hope to someday divorce. Choose anyone. Oh, hey, how about the person next to you in bed clipping their toenails and eating leftover kimchi with their hands? They seem super-divorceable.

With these questions, keep an eye out for mutual disdain. When resentment surfaces, lean into it. It’s the key to splitting up. Allow it to push you further apart until someone ends up alone watching “Roadhouse” at a cheap motel.

Before starting this exercise, one of you should read the following instructions aloud while the other removes any sharp objects from the room. Hide the blunt potential projectiles, too.

1. Read each question aloud while the other shuts up and doesn’t talk over me. The other just listens. Can the other do that? Just listen?

2. It’s important to answer each question in order, though it’s hard to tell what’s important to you anymore.

3. The questions are divided into three sets. Each set will take about five minutes but feel like an eternity. That’s why the questions are divided into three sets. Because an eternity divided by three is ... um.

4. Do not rush through the questions, but answer each one at a comfortable, quick-to-turn-defensive, deeply spiteful pace.

5. You probably won’t get through all the questions in each set, and that will be your fault. Just like everything else.

Hang tight, here come the questions...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

SET I

1. Which one of my siblings do you find most attractive?

2. If you were to die tomorrow, how and by whom would you want to be killed?

3. Name 4,000 things we don’t have in common.

4. What does the inside of a gym look like? (No Googling this!)

SET II

5. Where’s the TV remote?

6. If you were given the chance to bring peace to the Middle East, would you also make that about you?

7. It’s not under the couch. You had it last. Where is it???

8. I don’t want to grow old with you. (Whoops — more of a statement.)

SET III

9. Our house is on fire. What’s the one thing you grab before escaping the flames besides the original copy of our prenup?

10. Do you think a new shower curtain rod is going to buy and install itself?

11. If you could go back in time, would you mind staying there?

12. What’s one thing you like about me? (LOL kidding, skip this.)

12a. If we were the last two people on Earth, whom would you want to divorce and why?

13. Should we have sex now?

After answering “I’m all set” to the last question, take four minutes to quietly stare into space thinking about who gets to keep the log-in details for the Fabswingers couple account.*

(Ok, I may have amended the last one!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes to 13.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yes to 13. "

— love your blinkered reading!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Love this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes to 13.

— love your blinkered reading!

"

I skimmed the rest of it!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Love this "

. It made me snort!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yes to 13.

— love your blinkered reading!

I skimmed the rest of it! "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn't it be quicker to just shag of the inlaws?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes to 13.

— love your blinkered reading!

I skimmed the rest of it!

"

Spread yer legs, I'm going in!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Wouldn't it be quicker to just shag of the inlaws? "

Depends how quick you shag?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yes to 13.

— love your blinkered reading!

I skimmed the rest of it!

Spread yer legs, I'm going in! "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Wouldn't it be quicker to just shag of the inlaws?

Depends how quick you shag? "

She'll get the best 30 seconds of her life.

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By *oubyLoverWoman
over a year ago

East Yorkshire

If you were given the chance to bring peace to the Middle East, would you also make that about you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Wouldn't it be quicker to just shag of the inlaws?

Depends how quick you shag?

She'll get the best 30 seconds of her life. "

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you were given the chance to bring peace to the Middle East, would you also make that about you?

"

I know, right?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes to 13.

— love your blinkered reading!

I skimmed the rest of it!

Spread yer legs, I'm going in!

"

I'll warm my hands up first

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By *nleashedCrakenMan
over a year ago

Widnes


"If you were given the chance to bring peace to the Middle East, would you also make that about you?

"

But it is about me!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you were given the chance to bring peace to the Middle East, would you also make that about you?

But it is about me! "

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By *oubyLoverWoman
over a year ago

East Yorkshire


"If you were given the chance to bring peace to the Middle East, would you also make that about you?

I know, right?! "

Divorce or not I’m going to find someone to use that on soon

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you were given the chance to bring peace to the Middle East, would you also make that about you?

I know, right?!

Divorce or not I’m going to find someone to use that on soon "

It’s worth logging, for sure.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also, Estella, get in my bloody inbox!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Also, Estella, get in my bloody inbox! "

What’s stopping you getting in mine? Don’t tell me you’re blocked too? Sheesh, no one was blocked!! Agghh!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Also, Estella, get in my bloody inbox!

What’s stopping you getting in mine? Don’t tell me you’re blocked too? Sheesh, no one was blocked!! Agghh! "

Ahhh, yours was age! Gotcha, lowering it - didn’t really think the age thing through!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Also, Estella, get in my bloody inbox!

What’s stopping you getting in mine? Don’t tell me you’re blocked too? Sheesh, no one was blocked!! Agghh! "

I'm not 30 yet, that's what

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Also, Estella, get in my bloody inbox!

What’s stopping you getting in mine? Don’t tell me you’re blocked too? Sheesh, no one was blocked!! Agghh!

I'm not 30 yet, that's what "

Filters readjusted!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Good lord, I’m divorcing the lot of ya!’

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d try this on my wife but she’s sat on the other end of the sofa with her girlfriend

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

oh my.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Even the bloody dog’s up that end with them now too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Even the bloody dog’s up that end with them now too "

I'll come sit at your end

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Even the bloody dog’s up that end with them now too

I'll come sit at your end "

You’re a true friend

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’d try this on my wife but she’s sat on the other end of the sofa with her girlfriend "

Best sentence, ever

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


" oh my. "

Thought you’d enjoy it!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Even the bloody dog’s up that end with them now too

I'll come sit at on end "

Ooooft Alley and Rubi, sitting in a tree!!

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


" oh my.

Thought you’d enjoy it! "

Not sure what you could mean dear

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


" oh my.

Thought you’d enjoy it!

Not sure what you could mean dear "

Hahahaha!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’d try this on my wife but she’s sat on the other end of the sofa with her girlfriend

Best sentence, ever "

My Friday night

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And pssst, sorry for derailing your thread

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