FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Advice?!

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

From the ladies, as a single male what are the real turnoffs in an initial message?! After all it's a swingers site but being so blatant still feels all kinda wrong! I wanna have a naughty Christmas I'm genuine and I'm not that bad looking I don't think.. I'm shit with women so any help or advice much appreciated. Merry Christmas all x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone is different. Personally I don't like cut and paste messages, dirty ones, overly keen or too cheesy.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everyone is different. Personally I don't like cut and paste messages, dirty ones, overly keen or too cheesy."

Fuck me you’re so Edam sexy rubi !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"Everyone is different. Personally I don't like cut and paste messages, dirty ones, overly keen or too cheesy."

I camembert cheesy messages

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *is vixen at playCouple
over a year ago

Dundee

Messages that clearly no effort put in,

That havent read the profile

That think they gods gift

But most of all messages that only directed to V, this an instant no for us.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want to be talked to like I'm a human being. Any form of sex chat turns me off.

I don't mind cut and paste messages as most people don't reply so I understand why people c&p.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm sure I meet all the criteria you mention there and still hardly any interest lol! Most don't even seem to get opened just sit in inboxes x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Anything too crude is a Massive turn off in first message ie i wanna do this and this ..yawn.

Miss

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Seems as if you the horses for courses so to speak. I'm quite new to using the forums apparently this is the best bit of fab??

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Be polite and actually read the profile before messaging.

Don't be crude or expect anything.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best messages for me start with some kind of hi how are you. Then say something that shows my profile has been read. Then something that says why they think we would match. Then something along the lines of hope we can chat. Not an essay but more substantial than 'hi hows you'. Personalised not cut n paste. A face pic is always nice. Even then it depends on my mood how a message is received. And every women/couple will be different. It's a minefield OP

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"From the ladies, as a single male what are the real turnoffs in an initial message?! After all it's a swingers site but being so blatant still feels all kinda wrong! I wanna have a naughty Christmas I'm genuine and I'm not that bad looking I don't think.. I'm shit with women so any help or advice much appreciated. Merry Christmas all x"
hi how's you accompanied with a cock pic they love that

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm thinking maybe my messages aren't crude enough they are fairly tame maybe compliment assets let's say. Lie yourself for example looked at your pics and your curves are outrageous!!! X

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seems as if you the horses for courses so to speak. I'm quite new to using the forums apparently this is the best bit of fab??"

Forums can be fun. Social events are good for meeting people. Chat more and go to socials and you may have more luck than mail.

Use the Reply & Quote button so people know who you are replying to.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would suggest that saying you’re “shit with women” isn’t a good start - swearing never comes over well and no need to be so negative about yourself.

You’re male, they expect you to be sh!t - haha! Just joking...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Shit and the lingo before the ting go... pap pap pap

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally........ I hate being called “love” !!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Seems like there is no fine art after all everyone wants something different

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we all all different

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Thing is there's no catch all, instant success formula guaranteed to work OP - what will work for one person won't for another - so best bet is to be yourself and put whatever feels right for you.

Would always try to include something about you, something about what attracted you to their profile and why you think there would be a connection between you though.

Also if messages aren't working for you, take a look at what else you can do - such as profile improvements (a lot will look at your profile before deciding whether to read a message), getting along to clubs or socials or getting more involved in the forums (which is a great way to spark conversations)

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orticiaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral


"I'm sure I meet all the criteria you mention there and still hardly any interest lol! Most don't even seem to get opened just sit in inboxes x"

A lot of women will look at the profile before reading a message. You’ve only got one photo & 2 veri’s & your write up doesn’t really say much about you, so it might be that as much as the messages?

Definitely get some more public photos up & maybe put a bit more about you - what you like, what you don’t, what you’d like to get out of a meet ... that kind of thing

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"From the ladies, as a single male what are the real turnoffs in an initial message?! After all it's a swingers site but being so blatant still feels all kinda wrong! I wanna have a naughty Christmas I'm genuine and I'm not that bad looking I don't think.. I'm shit with women so any help or advice much appreciated. Merry Christmas all x"

For us it's that they don't see the massive letters at the top of our profile. However when we are looking for a single gent just a plain old "Hi, how are you" is fine.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The crude ones are an instant no no from me, when they message saying can I fill your pussy with hot cum or come suck my cock etc I almost want to turn into a nun

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm

Too crude I have manners and respect, seems like my profile is pretty shit but ain't easy getting good pics can't exactly ask the lads to take a few snaps for me lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss GalitzineWoman
over a year ago

Near Bath

[Removed by poster at 18/12/17 20:05:24]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss GalitzineWoman
over a year ago

Near Bath


"Everyone is different. Personally I don't like cut and paste messages, dirty ones, overly keen or too cheesy.

I camembert cheesy messages "

A lot of girls can't..it drive emmental.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I'm

Too crude I have manners and respect, seems like my profile is pretty shit but ain't easy getting good pics can't exactly ask the lads to take a few snaps for me lol "

Camera on your phone and the timer is all you need - that's how almost all of mine were taken

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I'm

Too crude I have manners and respect, seems like my profile is pretty shit but ain't easy getting good pics can't exactly ask the lads to take a few snaps for me lol

Camera on your phone and the timer is all you need - that's how almost all of mine were taken "

Mine too.

Personally I'd look at your pics, what makes them eye catching and different?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Putting the title as "slut"... like i have just had...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Putting the title as "slut"... like i have just had... "

nice! I just had one from a guy asking if I liked younger men. He was only a year younger than me haha

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Putting the title as "slut"... like i have just had...

nice! I just had one from a guy asking if I liked younger men. He was only a year younger than me haha"

HAHAHAHA Epic.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *evil_u_knowMan
over a year ago

city

Say whatever you want, if you write what they want to read, then you will just block them after the meet anyway.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top