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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

tonight i received a message from a couple, it read

hi how are you tonight

so i replied

im fine thanks & how are you both

the reply

good ty

Hmmmmmmmmmm i thought, like trying to get blood from a stone me thinks

so i thought ok 1 last try

did you fancy a chat, says i

yes

was the reply

ok then fire away, what would you like to know?

& NO REPLY, NOTHING at all, jesus

its not just SINGLE GUYS

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"tonight i received a message from a couple, it read

hi how are you tonight

so i replied

im fine thanks & how are you both

the reply

good ty

Hmmmmmmmmmm i thought, like trying to get blood from a stone me thinks

so i thought ok 1 last try

did you fancy a chat, says i

yes

was the reply

ok then fire away, what would you like to know?

& NO REPLY, NOTHING at all, jesus

its not just SINGLE GUYS "

Maybe it was the male half of the couple?

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago

I know that

You know that

Lots of people know that

Some people have no conversational skills thats all

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

puzzled

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago


"puzzled "

about what?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"puzzled "

Dont worry at least you got amessage and move on from it mate .

Feck did i just say that as i dont and hold a grudge lol

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Sometimes there just is'nt a good vibe going on.....Ive had the same from couples and single guys

Its just how it works sometimes

Although it would be fair to say they did'nt give it much of a chance to get any vibe going at all

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

it just puzzles me how people can be sometimes, made me laugh anyways

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

I think some people are net fishing rather than rod fishing. Get lots of reply’s and struggle to answer.

But also some just……….well lets be honest they bore the tits off you. Never a stranger to the typed word my self but if someone isn’t going to type a positive reply on line what will it be like in a meet. I don’t know what your like but I want more than a “ hi we are davina and dave shall we fuck” Ok not after family history but I like to play with friends, well you know what I mean. I avoids what I call hi/bye couples.

Ok preaching over from me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd have given up at 'good ty'... they messaged you, if they can't be bothered to carry it on any more than that then why worry?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get messages from blokes and couples that are only a few lines long. When I ask them to give me more information they get funny with me. Just like to know a bit more about people before I even consider playing with them. Manners don't cost anything but are priceless.....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'd have given up at 'good ty'... they messaged you, if they can't be bothered to carry it on any more than that then why worry? "

well im not worried nor desperate but like you said....they messaged me, found it funny to be honest, getting to learn things as i go & learn my own mistakes also

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

Twelve word profile and you know its going to be hard work. I will go three replies and then bang my head against the wall………..get a beer…………bang my head again and say thanks but no thanks. Are others more persistent??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have a very good block button hehehe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd have given up at 'good ty'... they messaged you, if they can't be bothered to carry it on any more than that then why worry?

well im not worried nor desperate but like you said....they messaged me, found it funny to be honest, getting to learn things as i go & learn my own mistakes also "

Well exactly, and if I'm honest I might not have even responded to the first one, but like you I think I went through that process with at least one person/couple before which is why now I wouldn't bother...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Twelve word profile and you know its going to be hard work. I will go three replies and then bang my head against the wall………..get a beer…………bang my head again and say thanks but no thanks. Are others more persistent?? "

With the head banging, perhaps, with the replying, perhaps not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I know that

You know that

Lots of people know that

Some people have no conversational skills thats all

"

What are con versa tional skills then is that like talking cause i dont like talking quiet me xx

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

We got a message from a single guy last night, paraphrasing it asked if we would meet.

K was a little suspicious and replied

"we only meet married men with their wife!"

his response

"what makes you think I'm married or ever have been" (this is the crucial bit)

K says

"no mention of actually being single on your profile and you can't accomodate" (often but not always a give away of a non-playing partner)

and his response was

"I have two children living at home"

Think we will pass this one by

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Get messages from blokes and couples that are only a few lines long. When I ask them to give me more information they get funny with me. Just like to know a bit more about people before I even consider playing with them. Manners don't cost anything but are priceless....."

Could you expand on this please ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"tonight i received a message from a couple, it read

hi how are you tonight

so i replied

im fine thanks & how are you both

the reply

good ty

Hmmmmmmmmmm i thought, like trying to get blood from a stone me thinks

so i thought ok 1 last try

did you fancy a chat, says i

yes

was the reply

ok then fire away, what would you like to know?

& NO REPLY, NOTHING at all, jesus

its not just SINGLE GUYS "

Women get the same short one liner’s men do so don’t think you’re on your own. I press that big delete button.

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

[Removed by poster at 13/08/09 13:45:10]

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside


"tonight i received a message from a couple, it read

hi how are you tonight

so i replied

im fine thanks & how are you both

the reply

good ty

Hmmmmmmmmmm i thought, like trying to get blood from a stone me thinks

so i thought ok 1 last try

did you fancy a chat, says i

yes

was the reply

ok then fire away, what would you like to know?

& NO REPLY, NOTHING at all, jesus

its not just SINGLE GUYS "

(Where's an Edit Button when you need one! lol)

Just an observation and not a critisism in anyway but!

Wasn't your replies to them just as vague as theirs was to you? Isn't 'im fine thanks' the same as 'good ty'?

So maybe they thought the same about you as you did about them, that you weren't much of a conversationalist??

Again no critisism intended but just another point of view!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He didnt put just fine thanks tho

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside


"He didnt put just fine thanks tho"

You're right he didn't just put 'im fine thanks' that was his answer to their initial question of 'hi how are you tonight' so when he asked the question '& how are you both' their reply 'good ty' was just as vague as his reply to them.

That was the point I was trying to make, if he expected a big reply to '& how are you both' maybe a longer reply to their initial question might have been needed in the first place??

Again no critisism to the OP it was just an observation that if someone expects long replies then they should maybe do the same themselves!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmmm sorry im with the OP on this one but understand wot ur getting at hun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"tonight i received a message from a couple, it read

hi how are you tonight

so i replied

im fine thanks & how are you both

the reply

good ty

Hmmmmmmmmmm i thought, like trying to get blood from a stone me thinks

so i thought ok 1 last try

did you fancy a chat, says i

yes

was the reply

ok then fire away, what would you like to know?

& NO REPLY, NOTHING at all, jesus

its not just SINGLE GUYS

(Where's an Edit Button when you need one! lol)

Just an observation and not a critisism in anyway but!

Wasn't your replies to them just as vague as theirs was to you? Isn't 'im fine thanks' the same as 'good ty'?

So maybe they thought the same about you as you did about them, that you weren't much of a conversationalist??

Again no critisism intended but just another point of view! "

I agree with YOU ... takes two.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well the 'good thank u' to me really was a conversation ender id've put 'good thank u, like ur profile would luv 2 chat 2 u' they did initially mail him after all

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside


"Well the 'good thank u' to me really was a conversation ender id've put 'good thank u, like ur profile would luv 2 chat 2 u' they did initially mail him after all "

Does that not mean then the OP should have done the same and put back more than just more than his 'im fine thanks'?

The initial contact for anyone on here is a way of finding out if someone is interested or not in taking it further and from an 'im fine thanks' (if i was the couple) i would have taken that as he is just being polite and has no interest really.

Like you say 'good ty' is a conversation stopper for you so maybe 'im fine thanks' is the couples conversation stopper for them?

Once again just another point of view from someone who, like GrannyCrumpet said, thinks it ..... takes two!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At the end of the day theres no right and wrong way of going about contacting people...we all expect different things...i understand wot ur saying im just putting my point across aswell and we could be here all day saying he shoulda said this they shoulda said that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well the 'good thank u' to me really was a conversation ender id've put 'good thank u, like ur profile would luv 2 chat 2 u' they did initially mail him after all

Does that not mean then the OP should have done the same and put back more than just more than his 'im fine thanks'?

The initial contact for anyone on here is a way of finding out if someone is interested or not in taking it further and from an 'im fine thanks' (if i was the couple) i would have taken that as he is just being polite and has no interest really.

Like you say 'good ty' is a conversation stopper for you so maybe 'im fine thanks' is the couples conversation stopper for them?

Once again just another point of view from someone who, like GrannyCrumpet said, thinks it ..... takes two! "

Not knocking what anyone has said here as it all seems valid, but just wanted to say that despite the inital bit of the conversation, the OP did try and take it further after only to get no response... so what are your thoughts on that, do you think he'd put them off with the earlier bit?

As it goes I had a similar conversation today and in light of this thread I decided to reply so my one went:

"Hi, how are you? (from them)

I'm good thanks (thought I'd keep it the same)

We are looking for some fun today, would you be interested?"

So it seems some people may take it differently than others. Perhaps we are second guessing why they didn't reply back to the OP, there could be any number of reasons that conversation went how it did.

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By *imfromGlasgowMan
over a year ago

er...guess


"tonight i received a message from a couple, it read

hi how are you tonight

so i replied

im fine thanks & how are you both

the reply

good ty

Hmmmmmmmmmm i thought, like trying to get blood from a stone me thinks

so i thought ok 1 last try

did you fancy a chat, says i

yes

was the reply

ok then fire away, what would you like to know?

& NO REPLY, NOTHING at all, jesus

its not just SINGLE GUYS "

No, it's not just single guys who get tangled up in messaging tig but it's single guys who have to work a wee bit harder to set themselves apart from the crowd.

When the couple ask "hi how are you tonight?" they aren't really interested in how you are (a bit like those 'how's u' texts people insist on sending) they're saying 'impress us' and a straight one liner reply won't do that. HOW you do that is about your personality and interests but I'd look to pick up on something on their profile or about their location or ............ whatever.

Asking them to ask you questions probably isn't great either. Tell them something that isn't on your profile you think might interest them or even something trivial that might just light a spark.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well the 'good thank u' to me really was a conversation ender id've put 'good thank u, like ur profile would luv 2 chat 2 u' they did initially mail him after all

Does that not mean then the OP should have done the same and put back more than just more than his 'im fine thanks'?

The initial contact for anyone on here is a way of finding out if someone is interested or not in taking it further and from an 'im fine thanks' (if i was the couple) i would have taken that as he is just being polite and has no interest really.

Like you say 'good ty' is a conversation stopper for you so maybe 'im fine thanks' is the couples conversation stopper for them?

Once again just another point of view from someone who, like GrannyCrumpet said, thinks it ..... takes two!

Not knocking what anyone has said here as it all seems valid, but just wanted to say that despite the inital bit of the conversation, the OP did try and take it further after only to get no response... so what are your thoughts on that, do you think he'd put them off with the earlier bit?

As it goes I had a similar conversation today and in light of this thread I decided to reply so my one went:

"Hi, how are you? (from them)

I'm good thanks (thought I'd keep it the same)

We are looking for some fun today, would you be interested?"

So it seems some people may take it differently than others. Perhaps we are second guessing why they didn't reply back to the OP, there could be any number of reasons that conversation went how it did."

Just another day in the life on a swingers site eh hun

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside


"At the end of the day theres no right and wrong way of going about contacting people...we all expect different things...i understand wot ur saying im just putting my point across aswell and we could be here all day saying he shoulda said this they shoulda said that."

Yeah we could be, mmmmmm wasn't how I thought I would spend my first day on holiday though lol

It does go to show though that the OP and the couple had probably just the same differing opinions on initial contact as we do, along with everyone else on here - each to their own

Right am off to do something useful with my time off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I often see it as how would u speak 2 someone who caught ur eye whilst u was out on the town maybe...a quick hi how are u and if u get the right response the the conversation will easily flow...im sorry but im not gonna do the spanish inquistion straightaway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

When the couple ask "hi how are you tonight?" they aren't really interested in how you are (a bit like those 'how's u' texts people insist on sending) they're saying 'impress us' and a straight one liner reply won't do that. "

Frankly, if that is how they are thinking they can sod off! It just sounds arrogant, why should I jump just because they say so, they have to impress me as well. Fortunately I don't think that is the case most of the time...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"At the end of the day theres no right and wrong way of going about contacting people...we all expect different things...i understand wot ur saying im just putting my point across aswell and we could be here all day saying he shoulda said this they shoulda said that.

Yeah we could be, mmmmmm wasn't how I thought I would spend my first day on holiday though lol

It does go to show though that the OP and the couple had probably just the same differing opinions on initial contact as we do, along with everyone else on here - each to their own

Right am off to do something useful with my time off

"

Hehe ave a good day hun x

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By *imfromGlasgowMan
over a year ago

er...guess


"

When the couple ask "hi how are you tonight?" they aren't really interested in how you are (a bit like those 'how's u' texts people insist on sending) they're saying 'impress us' and a straight one liner reply won't do that.

Frankly, if that is how they are thinking they can sod off! It just sounds arrogant, why should I jump just because they say so, they have to impress me as well. Fortunately I don't think that is the case most of the time..."

It's not arrogance at all. It's a function of the numbers game that is Fab. Couples feel, rightly or wrongly, that they can pick and choose. You can elect not to play their game but you be assured there's always someone who will.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

When the couple ask "hi how are you tonight?" they aren't really interested in how you are (a bit like those 'how's u' texts people insist on sending) they're saying 'impress us' and a straight one liner reply won't do that.

Frankly, if that is how they are thinking they can sod off! It just sounds arrogant, why should I jump just because they say so, they have to impress me as well. Fortunately I don't think that is the case most of the time..."

good post!

well this has turned into a good thread & no offence taken from anyone

its good to get the difference of opinions

with receiving the initial message the reason i replied short was a) im not desperate & certainly dont want to come across that way & have them running for the hills b)maybe it was just a short message & if they got a reply then they would start chatting.

i can defo see the points raised by both sides tho & will reconsider my replies very carefully in future, i just live in fear of being labelled as one of the many "desperado's" that are on here, although maybe i already have

handshakes all round

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

Its an emotive subject so glad you brought it up. I personally would prefer not to be mailed than a hi how are you thing. It is slightly frustration as you can see the potential but you get the feeling it will be pretty hard work to communicate.

I have go to the point I would rather not bother than bang my head against the wall in frustration. But there and again im happy with my lot right now.

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