FabSwingers.com forum: stuck in a rut

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Well been meaning to put this thread out for a while but been a bit 50/50 on it but screw it. Been using the forums for while and made great friends online as well in person and looking forward to some meet's in the future. But as off late have felt a bit lonely I do have friends outside of fab but due to distance and schedules. I do have fab friends but that unforgiving mistress that distance strikes again, also some of course we are just friends due age differences which I will always respect last thing I want to do is make anyone feel in uncomfortable . Love the forums as it's a great way to break the ice with people and love the flirting and laughs along with it but a lot of ladies my own age don't use them and I try my best with browser message but I am getting no where. it's something I wanted to get of my chest and even more so after a having such fun at a group social then the social with drawl made me feel lonely again and haven't really met anyone a round my age nothing against my distance older lady friends who don't care about my age hopefully we shall have some playtime in the future

but this is a bit more than that not a girlfriend per say yes I am aware of dating sites but been harder to no who is genuine on them that it is here . Just like to get out the house a bit more a socialising really I know I am not for everyone but some advice on how to standout of hundreds of messages and also to break the ice better would be very helpful. This is not a rant and rave just I genuine guy feeling a bit low. P.s sorry I know my grammar is awful and the thread is a bit long

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Aww Banny I’ve no advice other than have patience. You’re a lovely young man and hopefully some ladies will realise that and meet you. You’ve made the effort for a couple of socials and that’s a good thing. Perhaps try a club or more socials x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Aww Banny I’ve no advice other than have patience. You’re a lovely young man and hopefully some ladies will realise that and meet you. You’ve made the effort for a couple of socials and that’s a good thing. Perhaps try a club or more socials x "
well love to go to cupids but need to be 25 or with someone which far enough looking at group socials but unlikely i can make them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Aww Banny I’ve no advice other than have patience. You’re a lovely young man and hopefully some ladies will realise that and meet you. You’ve made the effort for a couple of socials and that’s a good thing. Perhaps try a club or more socials x well love to go to cupids but need to be 25 or with someone which far enough looking at group socials but unlikely i can make them"

Ah yes the age thing is something you can’t change. But hopefully there is more socials planned and that will help build your confidence x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Aww Banny I’ve no advice other than have patience. You’re a lovely young man and hopefully some ladies will realise that and meet you. You’ve made the effort for a couple of socials and that’s a good thing. Perhaps try a club or more socials x well love to go to cupids but need to be 25 or with someone which far enough looking at group socials but unlikely i can make them

Ah yes the age thing is something you can’t change. But hopefully there is more socials planned and that will help build your confidence x "
yeah i need at moment bit of awkward thread but needed to get of my chest

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By *iss.RedWoman
over a year ago

somewhere

There's always a bit of a slump after the excitement of a social. Keep doing what you're doing, attending socials and chatting on here. Just don't make here your primary focus for meeting people, try and get chatting to people in other situations too. Most of all give yourself time and be kind to yourself

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

Banny, we've had a fair few chats, and you really are a decent bloke.

Sending you the biggest of hugs.

Keep your fuzzy chin up & stay positive xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There's always a bit of a slump after the excitement of a social. Keep doing what you're doing, attending socials and chatting on here. Just don't make here your primary focus for meeting people, try and get chatting to people in other situations too. Most of all give yourself time and be kind to yourself

"
I know just been like it this before the social just my confidence takes a blow after a dry spell other situations well not sure about that we shall see cheers Ginge

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By *rongstantineWoman
over a year ago

hull

Get yourself to your local munches- there are tons in Manchester both age restricted and non.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Get yourself to your local munches- there are tons in Manchester both age restricted and non. "
Munches what's that ?

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I think that I fully understood your post Banny - don't fret about perfection here!

A couple of things strike me - your isolation/potential lower mood and your desire to expand on your swinging experience. For the former, I wonder if you have assessed your full qualities and how they would be attractive and what you could offer others. If you have the time and energy, could volunteering help you to meet others (volunteers or others), as well as potentially providing interesting experience? We don't all have a lot of spare time or energy - but wondered if it may fit you. That's likely to be less related to swinging or sex.

Decent people, single men in particular, who have the patience and determination to plough on here, are more likely to do well imo. Tougher in the meantime but similarly to another poster, it's potentially helpful to broaden your investment in to social and sexual opportunities, so that you may gain positive experiences that are supportive and faster.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Aww Banny I’ve no advice other than have patience. You’re a lovely young man and hopefully some ladies will realise that and meet you. You’ve made the effort for a couple of socials and that’s a good thing. Perhaps try a club or more socials x well love to go to cupids but need to be 25 or with someone which far enough looking at group socials but unlikely i can make them

Ah yes the age thing is something you can’t change. But hopefully there is more socials planned and that will help build your confidence x yeah i need at moment bit of awkward thread but needed to get of my chest"

Nah it's not awkward, there was another thread (yesterday I think) where lots of people said they were lonely. Stuff like that is good because it shows we're in the same boat.

I wonder if there's an opening for a mini social? Like less people but meet up in a pub or something.

I suppose the main issue is locality. People are all over the country. But worth a try. I know someone organised something similar in Preston a while back and it went well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've only met you briefly at the two Socials but you seem a decent guy and are doing all the recommended things.

I would agree with what others have said in that you shouldn't limit yourself to fab. The harsh reality of fab is that even most decent guys struggle, the nature of the site means the odds are always against you as a single man. You might find other sites where the male/female ratio is more even are easier for you to get noticed on. I won't comment on your profile as you've not asked about it but if you decide to persevere on here and want some assistance with it I'm happy to help.

Don't be too tough on yourself anyway, it takes time to make connections on here. Hope you feel more positive soon.

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