Join us FREE, we're FREE to use
Web's largest swingers site since 2006.
Already registered?
Login here
Join us FREE, we're FREE to use
Web's largest swingers site since 2006.
Already registered?
Login here
 | Back to forum list |
| Back to The Lounge |
| Jump to newest |  |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I think this is fab and u should not bring any thing about kids in to it to many freaks in here " This.  | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Perhaps you would like to clarify your terms. What is the difference between a fucking good kicking and a good smacking? At what level of misbehaviour do you consider it acceptable to resort to physical violence against not only another human being but I assume your own child... please god tell me it's not others children... And just what level of physical pain is it acceptable to inflict on a child you helped to create. How do you measure that level of pain physical and emotional as experienced by said child And do you not consider there may be a better way to educate those we are supposed to care about above all others that does not involve the use of violence as a control or training mechanism. Have you ever considered the concept that violence begats violence may be both true and the perpetuation of cycles if abuse. Do you contemplate that your actions now may indeed store up and create future relationship difficulties between you and your child as they grow older to the point where eventually they mature sufficiently to respond in kind to the use of violence against them or even consider it acceptable to be the aggressor via learned behaviour... This question has been asked before prepare for a deluge of replies on both sides of the argument... But I have one final question OP.. If you love someone...why the fuck would you even consider any measure of violence against them to have any positive effect... ever.. Im off back to the man cave before I say something I may regret.. " Perfectly put, great reply... | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Perhaps you would like to clarify your terms. What is the difference between a fucking good kicking and a good smacking? At what level of misbehaviour do you consider it acceptable to resort to physical violence against not only another human being but I assume your own child... please god tell me it's not others children... And just what level of physical pain is it acceptable to inflict on a child you helped to create. How do you measure that level of pain physical and emotional as experienced by said child And do you not consider there may be a better way to educate those we are supposed to care about above all others that does not involve the use of violence as a control or training mechanism. Have you ever considered the concept that violence begats violence may be both true and the perpetuation of cycles if abuse. Do you contemplate that your actions now may indeed store up and create future relationship difficulties between you and your child as they grow older to the point where eventually they mature sufficiently to respond in kind to the use of violence against them or even consider it acceptable to be the aggressor via learned behaviour... This question has been asked before prepare for a deluge of replies on both sides of the argument... But I have one final question OP.. If you love someone...why the fuck would you even consider any measure of violence against them to have any positive effect... ever.. Im off back to the man cave before I say something I may regret.. " Adults have never found a way to manage our relations with each other without the possibility of violence so why would relations to children be different? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Whats your views on it? Im not talking a fucking good kick in but do you think its ok to smack them when they missbehave." no no no | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"No .... I never smacked my children , I always explained to them if they did something wrong or dangerous ....if I raised my voice that was enough, and they have both turned out calm well adjusted people .... " totally agree ... | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I never needed too .i just shouted loud " I never even shouted loud. My children were raised to accept as a parent what I said goes. My eldest didn't like the trousers I bought her so cut six slashes in them. My initial thought was to hang her with them but it quickly passes. I sent her to get my sewing box. I said pick six colours that don't go with these trousers. After she picked six I threaded the needle and told her to sew the first slash. She continued until all six slashes were sewn. The next morning I told her to put the trousers on. I told her her father and I had to work to buy her things and it was rude, ungrateful and hurtful to destroy what we worked for. I usually drove her to school...we walked and I handed her over to her teacher. She cried every step of the way but she learnt for every action there's a reaction. I didn't have to bang up my gums to them either. With that regard I was my mother's daughter, children must know their place. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"It's better to find another way to discipline them. Smacking can spiral out of control." Wholeheartedly agree......slapping other people's on the other hand!  | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I never needed too .i just shouted loud I never even shouted loud. My children were raised to accept as a parent what I said goes. My eldest didn't like the trousers I bought her so cut six slashes in them. My initial thought was to hang her with them but it quickly passes. I sent her to get my sewing box. I said pick six colours that don't go with these trousers. After she picked six I threaded the needle and told her to sew the first slash. She continued until all six slashes were sewn. The next morning I told her to put the trousers on. I told her her father and I had to work to buy her things and it was rude, ungrateful and hurtful to destroy what we worked for. I usually drove her to school...we walked and I handed her over to her teacher. She cried every step of the way but she learnt for every action there's a reaction. I didn't have to bang up my gums to them either. With that regard I was my mother's daughter, children must know their place." So you chose to show your child up in public? Made her a laughing stock at school? Is that now not etched in her memory for ever? Will she remember that when she's 40? Do you think she would remember a smack or you taking away her favourite toy or maybe even yelling at her for it? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
 | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Whats your views on it? I'm not talking a fucking good kick in but do you think its ok to smack them when they misbehave." We think the PC brigade believe that those parents who smack their child(ren) must be smacking and heating the crap out of them all the time. Which isn't the case. Smacking quickly becomes a deterrent, it's a short sharp and decisive punishment then diminishes in frequency over time. Our children received a smack at first and as time went on, you had to scratch your head to remember the last time they were smacked. Those with time on their hands are more than welcome to perceive with that naughty step crap. I read that psychologists stated that smacking a child beyond the age of 12 was detrimental, so we just limited Xbox use, took certain stuff away etc.. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Any kind of violence towards children is wrong And no amount of protesting “it did me no harm” justifies such Neanderthal behaviour. " But mental abuse is just fine? Check out the rates of mental health problems/suicide rates in our young people of today. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Any kind of violence towards children is wrong And no amount of protesting “it did me no harm” justifies such Neanderthal behaviour. But mental abuse is just fine? Check out the rates of mental health problems/suicide rates in our young people of today. " The question was about physical violence to which I answered. But any right thinking person will agree that anything that causes damage to others is wrong. So no emotional abuse is not fine for heavens sake. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If I can't smack someone in my job or day to day life who annoys me, infuriates me or isn't listening to me then why should it be acceptable for me to hit my own children. And when I'm older and maybe losing my marbles, testing their patience and disobeying them, will it be acceptable for them to give me a slap?" Perfectly summed up well said that person | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Here's a different angle for you. I was never smacked, but lectured instead! This, to my young mind seemed to go on for fucking hours! A short sharp smack would have been much better at getting the point across! " My daughter said this about me. I remember at the time she'd be saying "muuuuum i know", like she didnt want to hear anymore. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If I can't smack someone in my job or day to day life who annoys me, infuriates me or isn't listening to me then why should it be acceptable for me to hit my own children. And when I'm older and maybe losing my marbles, testing their patience and disobeying them, will it be acceptable for them to give me a slap? Perfectly summed up well said that person " Children don't have the same minds as adults though. If any adult punched me in the face in a fit of rage i would hit them back. If a child did that i wouldn't. You can't have the same rules for adults and children. Saying that though. Id never hit a child for the reasons listed here anyway. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If I can't smack someone in my job or day to day life who annoys me, infuriates me or isn't listening to me then why should it be acceptable for me to hit my own children. And when I'm older and maybe losing my marbles, testing their patience and disobeying them, will it be acceptable for them to give me a slap? Perfectly summed up well said that person Children don't have the same minds as adults though. If any adult punched me in the face in a fit of rage i would hit them back. If a child did that i wouldn't. You can't have the same rules for adults and children. Saying that though. Id never hit a child for the reasons listed here anyway." You cannot have the same rules for children sound# like an opening line of a Dickens novel! So how do you apply those rules? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Any kind of violence towards children is wrong And no amount of protesting “it did me no harm” justifies such Neanderthal behaviour. But mental abuse is just fine? Check out the rates of mental health problems/suicide rates in our young people of today. The question was about physical violence to which I answered. But any right thinking person will agree that anything that causes damage to others is wrong. So no emotional abuse is not fine for heavens sake. " So how did you chastise your children? Assuming you have them? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"It's better to find another way to discipline them. Smacking can spiral out of control." | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I never needed too .i just shouted loud I never even shouted loud. My children were raised to accept as a parent what I said goes. My eldest didn't like the trousers I bought her so cut six slashes in them. My initial thought was to hang her with them but it quickly passes. I sent her to get my sewing box. I said pick six colours that don't go with these trousers. After she picked six I threaded the needle and told her to sew the first slash. She continued until all six slashes were sewn. The next morning I told her to put the trousers on. I told her her father and I had to work to buy her things and it was rude, ungrateful and hurtful to destroy what we worked for. I usually drove her to school...we walked and I handed her over to her teacher. She cried every step of the way but she learnt for every action there's a reaction. I didn't have to bang up my gums to them either. With that regard I was my mother's daughter, children must know their place." I was my mothers daughter? ? Children must know their place?? So im reading that as you were humiliated by your mother too.... History repeating itself ... | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I never needed too .i just shouted loud I never even shouted loud. My children were raised to accept as a parent what I said goes. My eldest didn't like the trousers I bought her so cut six slashes in them. My initial thought was to hang her with them but it quickly passes. I sent her to get my sewing box. I said pick six colours that don't go with these trousers. After she picked six I threaded the needle and told her to sew the first slash. She continued until all six slashes were sewn. The next morning I told her to put the trousers on. I told her her father and I had to work to buy her things and it was rude, ungrateful and hurtful to destroy what we worked for. I usually drove her to school...we walked and I handed her over to her teacher. She cried every step of the way but she learnt for every action there's a reaction. I didn't have to bang up my gums to them either. With that regard I was my mother's daughter, children must know their place." This is just plain weird and you should be ashamed of yourself for putting a child through that because she didn’t like a pair of trousers | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Any kind of violence towards children is wrong And no amount of protesting “it did me no harm” justifies such Neanderthal behaviour. But mental abuse is just fine? Check out the rates of mental health problems/suicide rates in our young people of today. The question was about physical violence to which I answered. But any right thinking person will agree that anything that causes damage to others is wrong. So no emotional abuse is not fine for heavens sake. So how did you chastise your children? Assuming you have them? " I have two children both of whom are fine upstanding members of society who are parents in their own rights. When they had erred and most times they knew they had I applied sanctions such as grounding them or withdrawing some of their social activities. On the whole I sat them down asking them to explain their actions and giving them the reason why they were being sanctioned. Seemed to work for me without resorting to violence | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Whats your views on it? Im not talking a fucking good kick in but do you think its ok to smack them when they missbehave." Im all for it, we got the belt at school and it was a way of keeping a class under control Class rooms are ruined now by smart ass kids who think they can do as they please without being touched | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Yes i believe a smack is needed for certain times. I was certainly smacked as a kid. i knew straight away ok ill not do that again or ill be snacked again. Sometimes talking just isnt enough. Id love if alot of the wasters around my area were smacked or chastised, they wouldn't be scum. And yes i have a child" | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I never needed too .i just shouted loud I never even shouted loud. My children were raised to accept as a parent what I said goes. My eldest didn't like the trousers I bought her so cut six slashes in them. My initial thought was to hang her with them but it quickly passes. I sent her to get my sewing box. I said pick six colours that don't go with these trousers. After she picked six I threaded the needle and told her to sew the first slash. She continued until all six slashes were sewn. The next morning I told her to put the trousers on. I told her her father and I had to work to buy her things and it was rude, ungrateful and hurtful to destroy what we worked for. I usually drove her to school...we walked and I handed her over to her teacher. She cried every step of the way but she learnt for every action there's a reaction. I didn't have to bang up my gums to them either. With that regard I was my mother's daughter, children must know their place. This is just plain weird and you should be ashamed of yourself for putting a child through that because she didn’t like a pair of trousers " Apologies I thought you had cut the trousers not your eldest. However the reaction was over the top. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Whats your views on it? Im not talking a fucking good kick in but do you think its ok to smack them when they missbehave. Im all for it, we got the belt at school and it was a way of keeping a class under control Class rooms are ruined now by smart ass kids who think they can do as they please without being touched" Beggars belief | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Whats your views on it? Im not talking a fucking good kick in but do you think its ok to smack them when they missbehave. Im all for it, we got the belt at school and it was a way of keeping a class under control Class rooms are ruined now by smart ass kids who think they can do as they please without being touched" Yeah my school did too,it was great being ruled by fear of a beating, not!! I'll never forget seeing one lad break down after being given the belt in front of the class, he really wasn't the same after that episode. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| Reply privately |
"Whats your views on it? Im not talking a fucking good kick in but do you think its ok to smack them when they missbehave." Maybe apply this to ypr wife or partner. And then realise how fucked up this question is. Never justifiable. It's abuse pure and simple | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Whats your views on it? Im not talking a fucking good kick in but do you think its ok to smack them when they missbehave. Maybe apply this to ypr wife or partner. And then realise how fucked up this question is. Never justifiable. It's abuse pure and simple" Children are not adults 
Where on earth did you get the idea you should treat children like your wife? I presume you'd fuck your wife... | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If I can't smack someone in my job or day to day life who annoys me, infuriates me or isn't listening to me then why should it be acceptable for me to hit my own children." If you threw a tantrumn at work, stood on your desk and chucked your computer around then you'd be removed from the office by force. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If I can't smack someone in my job or day to day life who annoys me, infuriates me or isn't listening to me then why should it be acceptable for me to hit my own children. If you threw a tantrumn at work, stood on your desk and chucked your computer around then you'd be removed from the office by force." .
I'd like the right to smack other people's kids as my own are to well behaved
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Whats your views on it? Im not talking a fucking good kick in but do you think its ok to smack them when they missbehave. Maybe apply this to ypr wife or partner. And then realise how fucked up this question is. Never justifiable. It's abuse pure and simple Children are not adults
Where on earth did you get the idea you should treat children like your wife? I presume you'd fuck your wife..."Yes I know they aren't adults. That's the whole point.you wouldn't hit an adult so why on earth wold anyone think hitting a child who is physically far smaller and weaker is okay? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Whats your views on it? Im not talking a fucking good kick in but do you think its ok to smack them when they missbehave. Maybe apply this to ypr wife or partner. And then realise how fucked up this question is. Never justifiable. It's abuse pure and simple Children are not adults
Where on earth did you get the idea you should treat children like your wife? I presume you'd fuck your wife...
Yes I know they aren't adults. That's the whole point.you wouldn't hit an adult so why on earth wold anyone think hitting a child who is physically far smaller and weaker is okay?". Were not talking a punch though are we!. A dead arm tops, maybe a C_inese burn  | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I never needed too .i just shouted loud " I remember my ex husband getting really annoyed with our youngest once,who was an absolute little tinker at time's. Tell her to stop doing something she shouldn't be doing and she'd carry on doing it for that bit longer,tell her to do something she should be doing and she’d carry on not doing it for that bit longer,the child was alway's trying to push it! Anyway one day he shouted at her in pure exasperation...all she did was scream back at him! That was the last time he did that .
I smacked her bottom once again in pure exasperation...at that point I knew I had lost control of the situation. I never did it again.
That child!  I love her really. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I've never smacked mine and I'm not comfortable when other parents smack there's, it usually lends to tears and like most humans seeing others in distress isn't enjoyable." . If we played up when we were out with me ma, she would very courteously say excuse me one minute well I deal with my children. Then drag us up an alley way, give us a dammed good slap and the smack down on what's coming next if we carry on!.  | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I've never smacked mine and I'm not comfortable when other parents smack there's, it usually lends to tears and like most humans seeing others in distress isn't enjoyable.. If we played up when we were out with me ma, she would very courteously say excuse me one minute well I deal with my children. Then drag us up an alley way, give us a dammed good slap and the smack down on what's coming next if we carry on!. "I remember my Mum full force smacking me in the face for wrecking my brand new tracksuit. It didn't hurt physically but did mentally and shocked me, I called her a C**t. So she did it again from the other side on the other cheek. Didn't hurt. What hurt was making her/leading her to do that. Her hard earned money ruined my by selfishness and then calling her an awful name. I was the cunt, not her. Cracking left followed by a solid right though fair play to her. Warmed my face up a bit. I'm sure my tears were changing to steam on impact of my skin. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Whats your views on it? Im not talking a fucking good kick in but do you think its ok to smack them when they missbehave. Maybe apply this to ypr wife or partner. And then realise how fucked up this question is. Never justifiable. It's abuse pure and simple Children are not adults
Where on earth did you get the idea you should treat children like your wife? I presume you'd fuck your wife...
Yes I know they aren't adults. That's the whole point.you wouldn't hit an adult so why on earth wold anyone think hitting a child who is physically far smaller and weaker is okay?"As adults we literally sanction the use of violence to allocated groups (i.e. police and military). If adults can't manage their affairs with eachother, without violence as an option then how can adults with children? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"It's never ok to hit a child! It is against the law . If you hit an adult in a social situation it's assault. So why do people think it's ok to hit children? I went through the school system where corporal punishment was the norm . I was just with a cane a belt a slipper and various other implements. These teachers were weak and could only control by fear . Their methods were degrading .they liked to humiliate the pupils to make up for their own inadequacy. I see parents smack their children and it makes me angry. When you shout or smack you have lost control " I remember one of my junior school teachers who was an absolute vile bitch. She smacked me in front of the whole class when I couldn't do a sum,you can't teach with fear. I remember spending that whole year thinking when I see her walking down the street with a walking stick when she's an old woman I'm going to knock the stick away so she falls  .
I hope she died a miserable death...evil bitch. Actually I remember that being painted on one of the school wall's. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I've never smacked mine and I'm not comfortable when other parents smack there's, it usually lends to tears and like most humans seeing others in distress isn't enjoyable.. If we played up when we were out with me ma, she would very courteously say excuse me one minute well I deal with my children. Then drag us up an alley way, give us a dammed good slap and the smack down on what's coming next if we carry on!.
I remember my Mum full force smacking me in the face for wrecking my brand new tracksuit.
It didn't hurt physically but did mentally and shocked me, I called her a C**t.
So she did it again from the other side on the other cheek. Didn't hurt.
What hurt was making her/leading her to do that. Her hard earned money ruined my by selfishness and then calling her an awful name.
I was the cunt, not her. Cracking left followed by a solid right though fair play to her. Warmed my face up a bit. I'm sure my tears were changing to steam on impact of my skin.". Me ma never needed face contact, she had this viscous whippy right handed slap perfectly placed just below your arse that proper stung, she could deliver it perfectly in m&s amongst the ladies fashion wear without anyone seeing . | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I've never smacked mine and I'm not comfortable when other parents smack there's, it usually lends to tears and like most humans seeing others in distress isn't enjoyable.. If we played up when we were out with me ma, she would very courteously say excuse me one minute well I deal with my children. Then drag us up an alley way, give us a dammed good slap and the smack down on what's coming next if we carry on!.
I remember my Mum full force smacking me in the face for wrecking my brand new tracksuit.
It didn't hurt physically but did mentally and shocked me, I called her a C**t.
So she did it again from the other side on the other cheek. Didn't hurt.
What hurt was making her/leading her to do that. Her hard earned money ruined my by selfishness and then calling her an awful name.
I was the cunt, not her. Cracking left followed by a solid right though fair play to her. Warmed my face up a bit. I'm sure my tears were changing to steam on impact of my skin..
Me ma never needed face contact, she had this viscous whippy right handed slap perfectly placed just below your arse that proper stung, she could deliver it perfectly in m&s amongst the ladies fashion wear without anyone seeing ."Ohhhh owch I just did that thing where you do a duck face and gasp your breath. I bet that stung like a bastard. I never had one there and Mum only hit me twice - the day I fucked my tracksuit up. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
 | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If I can't smack someone in my job or day to day life who annoys me, infuriates me or isn't listening to me then why should it be acceptable for me to hit my own children. And when I'm older and maybe losing my marbles, testing their patience and disobeying them, will it be acceptable for them to give me a slap?" Excellent point | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If I can't smack someone in my job or day to day life who annoys me, infuriates me or isn't listening to me then why should it be acceptable for me to hit my own children. If you threw a tantrumn at work, stood on your desk and chucked your computer around then you'd be removed from the office by force." Removed by force, yes. My boss wouldn't take me aside and punch me. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If I can't smack someone in my job or day to day life who annoys me, infuriates me or isn't listening to me then why should it be acceptable for me to hit my own children. If you threw a tantrumn at work, stood on your desk and chucked your computer around then you'd be removed from the office by force. Removed by force, yes. My boss wouldn't take me aside and punch me." . Punching children is illegal though. I don't think anybody is talking about that | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I have on maybe 2 occasions smacked my son. I haven’t for at least the last 5 years. I realised that when I did it, I did It from anger and that wasn’t the way it should be done. I’ve found taking away things he loves and telling him how he has disappointed me works much better. He is a teenager now and I rarely have any issues with him, we talk openly about things, we don’t have taboo subjects- he’s told me about friends smoking etc and we have discussed things in regards to smoking, sex, drugs and alcohol. I trust him and he trusts me enough to discuss these things. I would much rather have that than a child who fears me. What I do have issues with is children allowed to run havoc, although interestingly these seem to be the same children that get screamed at in the street" | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If I can't smack someone in my job or day to day life who annoys me, infuriates me or isn't listening to me then why should it be acceptable for me to hit my own children. If you threw a tantrumn at work, stood on your desk and chucked your computer around then you'd be removed from the office by force. Removed by force, yes. My boss wouldn't take me aside and punch me.. Punching children is illegal though. I don't think anybody is talking about that" OK, slap me across the face then. Point being it's not acceptable behaviour towards any child, adult or elderly person (as I suggested earlier). My kids are still pretty young, so I'm maybe tempting fate here as the difficult teenage years are still to come, but I don't think I'll have any major problems with them because I haven't smacked them. When they have done something wrong they can usually see the disappointment, frustration or even anger in my face and are quick to apologise. No through fear but because they've upset someone they love. And I'm quick to apologise to them. It's about mutual respect. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If I can't smack someone in my job or day to day life who annoys me, infuriates me or isn't listening to me then why should it be acceptable for me to hit my own children. If you threw a tantrumn at work, stood on your desk and chucked your computer around then you'd be removed from the office by force. Removed by force, yes. My boss wouldn't take me aside and punch me.. Punching children is illegal though. I don't think anybody is talking about that OK, slap me across the face then. Point being it's not acceptable behaviour towards any child, adult or elderly person (as I suggested earlier). My kids are still pretty young, so I'm maybe tempting fate here as the difficult teenage years are still to come, but I don't think I'll have any major problems with them because I haven't smacked them. When they have done something wrong they can usually see the disappointment, frustration or even anger in my face and are quick to apologise. No through fear but because they've upset someone they love. And I'm quick to apologise to them. It's about mutual respect." In my experience a slap on the hand is perfectly adequate. Face is totally unnecessary in my opinion. It's not the pain that achieves anything, it's more the act itself that achieves the goal. If you do it correctly then you'll only end up doing it once. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I never needed too .i just shouted loud I never even shouted loud. My children were raised to accept as a parent what I said goes. My eldest didn't like the trousers I bought her so cut six slashes in them. My initial thought was to hang her with them but it quickly passes. I sent her to get my sewing box. I said pick six colours that don't go with these trousers. After she picked six I threaded the needle and told her to sew the first slash. She continued until all six slashes were sewn. The next morning I told her to put the trousers on. I told her her father and I had to work to buy her things and it was rude, ungrateful and hurtful to destroy what we worked for. I usually drove her to school...we walked and I handed her over to her teacher. She cried every step of the way but she learnt for every action there's a reaction. I didn't have to bang up my gums to them either. With that regard I was my mother's daughter, children must know their place. This is just plain weird and you should be ashamed of yourself for putting a child through that because she didn’t like a pair of trousers " Yeah the more I read it the weirder it gets. Skelp on the arse and they wouldn't have slashed the trousers in the first place x | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Well opinions are like arseholes, everybody's got one, so we'll have to agree to disagree on this one. I've been in situations where I've seen Mums with a toddler and a young baby. The toddler starts acting up (as they do!) and because she's knackered and stressed dealing with two young kids, the slap on the hand soon escalates to a harder slap, then a slap on the backside, then being dragged out the soft play by the arm. It's not easy. I've been there myself." Children have different personalities. Some parents will be fortunate enough to have a kid that never needs a smack, all i really ask is that they don't extrapolate that assumption to every kid. If you think I'm an asshole now then you should have seen me as a kid, trust me - i needed a smack. I don't endorse the scenario you describe, the parent has lost control. I totally disagree with rage and uncontrolled violence. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Some of the little darlings get a shock when they join the forces after leaving school and it quickly becomes apparent they can't get away with that "you can't touch me I'll do what I like" attitude there. They can't be beaten anymore but they can certainly be physically run ragged around camp till they're blowing out of their hoops "Pain is the language of love for some people. For me as a child it was the only thing that worked, not by smacking but by the kind of methods you indirectly refer to. The smartest teacher i knew always made the oldest boys enforce the discipline at school. The punishment was always physical but non-violent (e.g. running around a field, press ups etc) but it was made clear that boys 4 years older than you were going to sock you in the mouth if you made shit for them. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Well opinions are like arseholes, everybody's got one, so we'll have to agree to disagree on this one. I've been in situations where I've seen Mums with a toddler and a young baby. The toddler starts acting up (as they do!) and because she's knackered and stressed dealing with two young kids, the slap on the hand soon escalates to a harder slap, then a slap on the backside, then being dragged out the soft play by the arm. It's not easy. I've been there myself. Children have different personalities. Some parents will be fortunate enough to have a kid that never needs a smack, all i really ask is that they don't extrapolate that assumption to every kid. If you think I'm an asshole now then you should have seen me as a kid, trust me - i needed a smack. I don't endorse the scenario you describe, the parent has lost control. I totally disagree with rage and uncontrolled violence. " No, honestly don't think you're an arsehole! Sorry if you took it that way. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you can't discipline a child without violence or shouting then I think it i you with the problem. I am older than most of you and my parents didn't smack us, they just had to give a certain look and we knew we had to stop what we were doing and behave. Punishment was grounding for various lengths when we got older. We treated our kids the same, they grew up well rounded adults who don't smack their children" This | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
 | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I don't agree with smacking kids I don't have kids tho so prob don't understand how hard it can be
"It sometimes takes a lot, A LOT of restraint not to allow your momentary anger and frustration to get the better of you. But the bottom lines has to be that the moment you need to resort to any form of violence, which in my world smacking constitutes, you have lost the control which is necessary to be fair to the child and to deliver a measured response. It can be difficult at times especially when you are under pressure and stressed about other things. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"When I want to strike terror into the hearts of my little darlings I just tell them I am going to change the wifi password. Works a treat " | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Reading over some of my posts on here and thinking that I may be trying to come across as the perfect mother. Just to balance things out, I have been known to wander into the kitchen, close the door and scream "FOR FUCKS SAKE!!!!" before returning calmly to the living room...." I can relate to this as well | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Reading over some of my posts on here and thinking that I may be trying to come across as the perfect mother. Just to balance things out, I have been known to wander into the kitchen, close the door and scream "FOR FUCKS SAKE!!!!" before returning calmly to the living room.... I can relate to this as well "Yep lol | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you can't discipline a child without violence or shouting then I think it i you with the problem. I am older than most of you and my parents didn't smack us, they just had to give a certain look and we knew we had to stop what we were doing and behave. Punishment was grounding for various lengths when we got older. We treated our kids the same, they grew up well rounded adults who don't smack their children" What of us that needed a smack? Grounding didn't work with me, taking my things didn't work, being all disappointed in me didn't work, nothing bloody worked, a smack of the old man though would have me thinking about what the hell i was playing at. I'm personally very glad my old man did when he did | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you can't discipline a child without violence or shouting then I think it i you with the problem. I am older than most of you and my parents didn't smack us, they just had to give a certain look and we knew we had to stop what we were doing and behave. Punishment was grounding for various lengths when we got older. We treated our kids the same, they grew up well rounded adults who don't smack their children What of us that needed a smack? Grounding didn't work with me, taking my things didn't work, being all disappointed in me didn't work, nothing bloody worked, a smack of the old man though would have me thinking about what the hell i was playing at. I'm personally very glad my old man did when he did" Aye, but Christos....You've just got one of those faces that you could never tire of slapping
Only kidding x | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"What happens when "the look" or a raised voice doesn't work though? One of my sisters friends used to actually punch or slap her mum when she was a teenager if she didn't get her own way, and no amount of hard stares, shouting or restricted privileges from both parents would stop her from doing it. She came from a wealthy family and both parents were nice people, she was just a spoiled princess with a bad attitude." You've already written the answer. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you can't discipline a child without violence or shouting then I think it i you with the problem. I am older than most of you and my parents didn't smack us, they just had to give a certain look and we knew we had to stop what we were doing and behave. Punishment was grounding for various lengths when we got older. We treated our kids the same, they grew up well rounded adults who don't smack their children What of us that needed a smack? Grounding didn't work with me, taking my things didn't work, being all disappointed in me didn't work, nothing bloody worked, a smack of the old man though would have me thinking about what the hell i was playing at. I'm personally very glad my old man did when he did Aye, but Christos....You've just got one of those faces that you could never tire of slapping
Only kidding x"Your so not kidding! | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you can't discipline a child without violence or shouting then I think it i you with the problem. I am older than most of you and my parents didn't smack us, they just had to give a certain look and we knew we had to stop what we were doing and behave. Punishment was grounding for various lengths when we got older. We treated our kids the same, they grew up well rounded adults who don't smack their children What of us that needed a smack? Grounding didn't work with me, taking my things didn't work, being all disappointed in me didn't work, nothing bloody worked, a smack of the old man though would have me thinking about what the hell i was playing at. I'm personally very glad my old man did when he did Aye, but Christos....You've just got one of those faces that you could never tire of slapping
Only kidding x
Your so not kidding! "(skelp) | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If I can't smack someone in my job or day to day life who annoys me, infuriates me or isn't listening to me then why should it be acceptable for me to hit my own children. If you threw a tantrumn at work, stood on your desk and chucked your computer around then you'd be removed from the office by force. Removed by force, yes. My boss wouldn't take me aside and punch me.. Punching children is illegal though. I don't think anybody is talking about that OK, slap me across the face then. Point being it's not acceptable behaviour towards any child, adult or elderly person (as I suggested earlier). My kids are still pretty young, so I'm maybe tempting fate here as the difficult teenage years are still to come, but I don't think I'll have any major problems with them because I haven't smacked them. When they have done something wrong they can usually see the disappointment, frustration or even anger in my face and are quick to apologise. No through fear but because they've upset someone they love. And I'm quick to apologise to them. It's about mutual respect." . I disagree, I know plenty of adults I think would benefit from a good slap | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I never needed too .i just shouted loud I never even shouted loud. My children were raised to accept as a parent what I said goes. My eldest didn't like the trousers I bought her so cut six slashes in them. My initial thought was to hang her with them but it quickly passes. I sent her to get my sewing box. I said pick six colours that don't go with these trousers. After she picked six I threaded the needle and told her to sew the first slash. She continued until all six slashes were sewn. The next morning I told her to put the trousers on. I told her her father and I had to work to buy her things and it was rude, ungrateful and hurtful to destroy what we worked for. I usually drove her to school...we walked and I handed her over to her teacher. She cried every step of the way but she learnt for every action there's a reaction. I didn't have to bang up my gums to them either. With that regard I was my mother's daughter, children must know their place. So you chose to show your child up in public? Made her a laughing stock at school? Is that now not etched in her memory for ever? Will she remember that when she's 40? Do you think she would remember a smack or you taking away her favourite toy or maybe even yelling at her for it? " She's 35 now and a mother of three. The fact that she and her sisters are raising their children to have "the same happy childhood they had" makes me feel I didn't do a bad job! | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Never mind the kids, some parents need a dam good slap !!" Now this I agree with. Heard a woman curse and swear at her toddler when I was out with kids a while ago. I would have happily drop kicked her into next fucking year if there had been no witnesses. Mrs D | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Whats your views on it? Im not talking a fucking good kick in but do you think its ok to smack them when they missbehave." If I wouldn't smack an adult for the transgression, then I wouldn't smack a child. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
" hit someone that cant hit back ...........why would you ." Yeah. The first time I hit my mother back, she stopped smacking me. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
" hit someone that cant hit back ...........why would you . Yeah. The first time I hit my mother back, she stopped smacking me." never hit a woman !!! | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
" hit someone that cant hit back ...........why would you . Yeah. The first time I hit my mother back, she stopped smacking me. never hit a woman !!!" Or a girl. Or a boy. Or a man. Or someone other than the above. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I am really glad its banned in Scotland There is no excuse what so ever to hit your kids if you cant talk to your kids and teach them right from wrong then there is something wrong. I dont seeing when people put i was hit as a kid when i did something wrong and it didnt do me any harm. When people say that and say it taught me not to do it again wrong!!! all it did was taught fear " It taught me not to repeat stuff that was naughty. Call it fear if you like but it worked. I wasnt beaten up or abused. Just a smack on my bum or legs. I rarely cried from it. I just sulked for a bit and thought about why it happened. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
" hit someone that cant hit back ...........why would you . Yeah. The first time I hit my mother back, she stopped smacking me. never hit a woman !!! Or a girl. Or a boy. Or a man. Or someone other than the above." | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Never mind the kids, some parents need a dam good slap !! Now this I agree with. Heard a woman curse and swear at her toddler when I was out with kids a while ago. I would have happily drop kicked her into next fucking year if there had been no witnesses. Mrs D " This definitely, I asked a woman on the bus to please stop swearing one day, it was 8:30am and everyone was on the school run, she and her friends were being very loud, rude to all passengers and swearing at the top of their lungs, to this day that woman says she going to ‘get me’ oh I can’t wait till that day when no kids are about | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"It's a fine balancing act between love and fear..... For training a dog! "the dog whisperer dosent hit the dogs to train , he teaches them to behave | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I am really glad its banned in Scotland There is no excuse what so ever to hit your kids if you cant talk to your kids and teach them right from wrong then there is something wrong. I dont seeing when people put i was hit as a kid when i did something wrong and it didnt do me any harm. When people say that and say it taught me not to do it again wrong!!! all it did was taught fear " No it didn't, who was never scared of my parents one bit, a stingy arse just made me think about whatever hell I'd done to deserve it and sure enough, the penny always dropped and realisation dawned. Fear though was never a thing however. Some kids can deal with a smack, some kids flake out and develop issues..we're all different | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I am really glad its banned in Scotland There is no excuse what so ever to hit your kids if you cant talk to your kids and teach them right from wrong then there is something wrong. I dont seeing when people put i was hit as a kid when i did something wrong and it didnt do me any harm. When people say that and say it taught me not to do it again wrong!!! all it did was taught fear " Won’t be law till next year | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
" However I do acknowledge that all kids are different and one size fits all may not work .." Thats very important. Punishment must deter but has to be weighed up and considered. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"It's a fine balancing act between love and fear..... For training a dog!
the dog whisperer dosent hit the dogs to train , he teaches them to behave". Soon as those cameras turn off I bet he gives them a right good whack | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I know I was smacked on odd occasions as a child, as my parents have told me I was but I can’t really recall it ever happening One thing I do remember is an occasion similar to one already mentioned here. I was 8 and my mum bought me a velour and tartan party dress that she loved but I hated, every time she put it in me I’d undress and throw it in the bin, once when she’s got royally pissed off with me doing it she leftbit in the bin for a few hours, then took it out and left it dirty and then took me out in it to a party, shamed me in public basically, afterwards the kids at school bullied me relentlessly for years, that’s scared me in many ways and I’ve never forgot it, But I never can remember ever being smacked Funny ain’t it? " A smack is brief and soon over. Public humiliation lasts a lifetime. There are far wore cruelties than physical pain | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I think this is fab and u should not bring any thing about kids in to it to many freaks in here " Dude, it's not all about sex ffs. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I think this is fab and u should not bring any thing about kids in to it to many freaks in here Dude, it's not all about sex ffs. "Fancy a fuck? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
 | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child. "Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child.
Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence. "Are you suggestin tbat there are reports and studies thst show hotting children to be beneficial to theor development? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child.
Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence.
Are you suggestin tbat there are reports and studies thst show hotting children to be beneficial to theor development?"I've been told there's evidence and I'd like to see it. Not sure how you could really misinterpret that post. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I find, when my kids are getting too rowdy, a swift right hook soon quietens them down. If you know of a quicker solution, then I'm all ears" If the above comment is true then you are a ####. If it is an attempt at humour then you're a shite comedian. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child.
Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence. "Try: The smacking controversy: what advice should we be giving parents? Taylor, Julie. Journal of Advanced Nursing Volume: 46 Issue 3 (2004) "Furthermore, in terms of behavioural effects, countries where smacking is banned are not overrun with sociopathic youngsters (Roberts 2000). The Swedish experience is salutary. During the 1980s, no Swedish child died as a result of physical abuse, only one was killed by parental hands in the period 1990–1996, and the number of children coming into care has decreased by 26% since 1982 (Durrant 2000). Compare this with Scotland’s figures (and make proportionate estimates for the whole UK), where 10 children died as a result of homicide in the year 2000 alone and the percentage of children subject to care and protection referrals increased by 238% between 1989 and 2000 (Scottish Executive 2000).In Britain as a whole, one to two children die every week from physical injuries inflicted by an adult (Chancellor 2000)." | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child.
Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence.
Try:
The smacking controversy: what advice should we be giving parents?
Taylor, Julie. Journal of Advanced Nursing Volume: 46 Issue 3 (2004)
"Furthermore, in terms of behavioural effects, countries where smacking is banned are not overrun with sociopathic youngsters (Roberts 2000). The Swedish experience is salutary. During the 1980s, no Swedish child died as a result of physical abuse, only one was killed by parental hands in the period 1990–1996, and the number of children coming into care has decreased by 26% since 1982 (Durrant 2000). Compare this with Scotland’s figures (and make proportionate estimates for the whole UK), where 10 children died as a result of homicide in the year 2000 alone and the percentage of children subject to care and protection referrals increased by 238% between 1989 and 2000 (Scottish Executive 2000).In Britain as a whole, one to two children die every week from physical injuries inflicted by an adult (Chancellor 2000)."
""The evidence suggests that smacking is detrimental to child health and well-being and, in some cases, may be a catalyst for progressive abuse. It can, therefore, be argued that, although health and social care professionals have personal beliefs and attitudes about the use of smacking, it is both unprofessional and perhaps even unethical to allow these personal beliefs to influence practice. The logical inference is that, by giving inconsistent advice to parents about the use of smacking, health care professionals may inadvertently be contributing to the unacceptably high level of child abuse in the UK." | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child.
Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence.
Try:
The smacking controversy: what advice should we be giving parents?
Taylor, Julie. Journal of Advanced Nursing Volume: 46 Issue 3 (2004)
"Furthermore, in terms of behavioural effects, countries where smacking is banned are not overrun with sociopathic youngsters (Roberts 2000). The Swedish experience is salutary. During the 1980s, no Swedish child died as a result of physical abuse, only one was killed by parental hands in the period 1990–1996, and the number of children coming into care has decreased by 26% since 1982 (Durrant 2000). Compare this with Scotland’s figures (and make proportionate estimates for the whole UK), where 10 children died as a result of homicide in the year 2000 alone and the percentage of children subject to care and protection referrals increased by 238% between 1989 and 2000 (Scottish Executive 2000).In Britain as a whole, one to two children die every week from physical injuries inflicted by an adult (Chancellor 2000)."
"The evidence suggests that smacking is detrimental to child health and well-being and, in some cases, may be a catalyst for progressive abuse. It can, therefore, be argued that, although health and social care professionals have personal beliefs and attitudes about the use of smacking, it is both unprofessional and perhaps even unethical to allow these personal beliefs to influence practice. The logical inference is that, by giving inconsistent advice to parents about the use of smacking, health care professionals may inadvertently be contributing to the unacceptably high level of child abuse in the UK.""Well I'm certainly not impressed with what you've cited but thanks for the effort all the same. It's just a logical fallacy to take the outcomes of the children at the extreme of the distribution and use that to justify the effect on the median. Maybe the children didn't die from homicide because they committed suicide, which is more common in sweden than here. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child.
Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence.
Are you suggestin tbat there are reports and studies thst show hotting children to be beneficial to theor development?
I've been told there's evidence and I'd like to see it. Not sure how you could really misinterpret that post. "I didn't misinterpret it. I'm just curious. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Well I'm certainly not impressed with what you've cited but thanks for the effort all the same. It's just a logical fallacy to take the outcomes of the children at the extreme of the distribution and use that to justify the effect on the median. Maybe the children didn't die from homicide because they committed suicide, which is more common in sweden than here. " I am entirely sure that you know far, far better than the peer review panel at the Journal of Advanced Nursing. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I see nothing wrong with a little smack to get the young rascals in check. Need to let these youngster know misbehaviour has consequences from a young age! Leave it late & u have no chance when they are teenagers "But what if by the time they ate teenagers they think a smack is the way to keep other people on check? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child.
Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence.
Are you suggestin tbat there are reports and studies thst show hotting children to be beneficial to theor development?
I've been told there's evidence and I'd like to see it. Not sure how you could really misinterpret that post.
I didn't misinterpret it. I'm just curious. "I would expect that uncontrolled violence has more negative effects than positive but zero controlled violence is worse than controlled violence. As I've said three times on this thread now, nobody has found a way to organise adult society without sanctioned violence so i see no reason to believe a childs world is better without it. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I see nothing wrong with a little smack to get the young rascals in check. Need to let these youngster know misbehaviour has consequences from a young age! Leave it late & u have no chance when they are teenagers
But what if by the time they ate teenagers they think a smack is the way to keep other people on check?"I feel like... Parents are allowed to hit this children if they do something they don't like. But if teenagers hit their parents because they do something they don't like, then they're likely to eventually get referred to social services for having psychological problems with violence, or perhaps even sent to youth detention. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Well I'm certainly not impressed with what you've cited but thanks for the effort all the same. It's just a logical fallacy to take the outcomes of the children at the extreme of the distribution and use that to justify the effect on the median. Maybe the children didn't die from homicide because they committed suicide, which is more common in sweden than here. I am entirely sure that you know far, far better than the peer review panel at the Journal of Advanced Nursing." None of what you've quoted makes the case you are claiming. For ease, what it would look like is: Group A - never smacked Group B - occasional light smack Group C - frequent resort to smacking "Group A children were found to do better at school, earn more as adults, form better relationships with..." | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I see nothing wrong with a little smack to get the young rascals in check. Need to let these youngster know misbehaviour has consequences from a young age! Leave it late & u have no chance when they are teenagers
But what if by the time they ate teenagers they think a smack is the way to keep other people on check?"Fair point its a double edged sword. Can only say from own experienced. Me & my siblings & cousins were all smacked if misbehaved when were young & we all turned out well. None was ever violent but well mannered & respectful | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Well I'm certainly not impressed with what you've cited but thanks for the effort all the same. It's just a logical fallacy to take the outcomes of the children at the extreme of the distribution and use that to justify the effect on the median. Maybe the children didn't die from homicide because they committed suicide, which is more common in sweden than here. I am entirely sure that you know far, far better than the peer review panel at the Journal of Advanced Nursing. None of what you've quoted makes the case you are claiming. For ease, what it would look like is: Group A - never smacked Group B - occasional light smack Group C - frequent resort to smacking "Group A children were found to do better at school, earn more as adults, form better relationships with..."" ` The rest of the article is pretty interesting. Feel free to read it. I'm not going to breech their copyright by posting the entire text here. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"The Swedish experience is salutary," Maybe if swedish people smacked their kids more they all wouldn't grow up to become the "having sex with women against their will" capital of the world. You're telling me the kids enjoy not being hit, well duh. But does it help them grow into a better person? Swedish crime rates would say no. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crime_in_Sweden#/media/File:Sweden-crime-1976-2016-robbery-sex-murder.svg the people who stopped hitting their kids (who were likely hit themselves) were far less problematic than the kids who never got hit as adults. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"Well I'm certainly not impressed with what you've cited but thanks for the effort all the same. It's just a logical fallacy to take the outcomes of the children at the extreme of the distribution and use that to justify the effect on the median. Maybe the children didn't die from homicide because they committed suicide, which is more common in sweden than here. I am entirely sure that you know far, far better than the peer review panel at the Journal of Advanced Nursing. None of what you've quoted makes the case you are claiming. For ease, what it would look like is: Group A - never smacked Group B - occasional light smack Group C - frequent resort to smacking "Group A children were found to do better at school, earn more as adults, form better relationships with..."` The rest of the article is pretty interesting. Feel free to read it. I'm not going to breech their copyright by posting the entire text here." It only makes sense if you start with the assumption aggression isn't normative. A brief reading if history will show you that it is. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"The Swedish experience is salutary, Maybe if swedish people smacked their kids more they all wouldn't grow up to become the "having sex with women against their will" capital of the world. You're telling me the kids enjoy not being hit, well duh. But does it help them grow into a better person? Swedish crime rates would say no. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crime_in_Sweden#/media/File:Sweden-crime-1976-2016-robbery-sex-murder.svg the people who stopped hitting their kids (who were likely hit themselves) were far less problematic than the kids who never got hit as adults." Or they just kill themselves as adults. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child.
Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence.
Are you suggestin tbat there are reports and studies thst show hotting children to be beneficial to theor development?
I've been told there's evidence and I'd like to see it. Not sure how you could really misinterpret that post.
I didn't misinterpret it. I'm just curious.
I would expect that uncontrolled violence has more negative effects than positive but zero controlled violence is worse than controlled violence. As I've said three times on this thread now, nobody has found a way to organise adult society without sanctioned violence so i see no reason to believe a childs world is better without it."We don't have ware sanctioned violence though. We punish them by deproviding g them of liberty or freedom. We don't give people a kicking amd say don't do it again,,. And Violence to control a situation is completely different to violence as a punishment
Violence breeds violence maybe society should look to break that cycle rather than fuel it? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child.
Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence.
Try:
The smacking controversy: what advice should we be giving parents?
Taylor, Julie. Journal of Advanced Nursing Volume: 46 Issue 3 (2004)
"Furthermore, in terms of behavioural effects, countries where smacking is banned are not overrun with sociopathic youngsters (Roberts 2000). The Swedish experience is salutary. During the 1980s, no Swedish child died as a result of physical abuse, only one was killed by parental hands in the period 1990–1996, and the number of children coming into care has decreased by 26% since 1982 (Durrant 2000). Compare this with Scotland’s figures (and make proportionate estimates for the whole UK), where 10 children died as a result of homicide in the year 2000 alone and the percentage of children subject to care and protection referrals increased by 238% between 1989 and 2000 (Scottish Executive 2000).In Britain as a whole, one to two children die every week from physical injuries inflicted by an adult (Chancellor 2000)."
"The evidence suggests that smacking is detrimental to child health and well-being and, in some cases, may be a catalyst for progressive abuse. It can, therefore, be argued that, although health and social care professionals have personal beliefs and attitudes about the use of smacking, it is both unprofessional and perhaps even unethical to allow these personal beliefs to influence practice. The logical inference is that, by giving inconsistent advice to parents about the use of smacking, health care professionals may inadvertently be contributing to the unacceptably high level of child abuse in the UK."
Well I'm certainly not impressed with what you've cited but thanks for the effort all the same. It's just a logical fallacy to take the outcomes of the children at the extreme of the distribution and use that to justify the effect on the median. Maybe the children didn't die from homicide because they committed suicide, which is more common in sweden than here. "So in short evidence that proves a point is easily dismissed if you don't agree with the poiny of view. And evidence to support your opinion isn't required as you are right? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"The Swedish experience is salutary, Maybe if swedish people smacked their kids more they all wouldn't grow up to become the "having sex with women against their will" capital of the world. " IIRC, Swedish rates of reporting are very high (because people feel safe and encouraged to report) which makes the statistics look proportionately high. They also have different categorisation of sex crimes to many other parts of the world (i.e. they categorise things as sex crimes that the UK does not) which leads to the figures looking skewed without further investigation. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I find, when my kids are getting too rowdy, a swift right hook soon quietens them down. If you know of a quicker solution, then I'm all ears If the above comment is true then you are a ####. If it is an attempt at humour then you're a shite comedian." Wow, tough crowd tonight  | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"I think this is fab and u should not bring any thing about kids in to it to many freaks in here " Here here! | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child.
Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence.
Are you suggestin tbat there are reports and studies thst show hotting children to be beneficial to theor development?
I've been told there's evidence and I'd like to see it. Not sure how you could really misinterpret that post.
I didn't misinterpret it. I'm just curious.
I would expect that uncontrolled violence has more negative effects than positive but zero controlled violence is worse than controlled violence. As I've said three times on this thread now, nobody has found a way to organise adult society without sanctioned violence so i see no reason to believe a childs world is better without it.
We don't have ware sanctioned violence though. We punish them by deproviding g them of liberty or freedom. We don't give people a kicking amd say don't do it again,,. And Violence to control a situation is completely different to violence as a punishment
Violence breeds violence maybe society should look to break that cycle rather than fuel it?"Of course we sanction violence! When we can't resolve a dispute with a country then the military goes in. In 200,000 years there has never been a non-violent human society that worked on any kind of scale. But if you want to keep trying... definition of insanity... | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
"If you hit a child your too dumb to raise a child properly. All studies have shown it does not work and only has negative affects. If you dont understand that maybe you were hit too hard as a child.
Could you recommend a study which illustrates your point and is avaialble on line? I'm always open to change my opinion in the light of good evidence.
Try:
The smacking controversy: what advice should we be giving parents?
Taylor, Julie. Journal of Advanced Nursing Volume: 46 Issue 3 (2004)
"Furthermore, in terms of behavioural effects, countries where smacking is banned are not overrun with sociopathic youngsters (Roberts 2000). The Swedish experience is salutary. During the 1980s, no Swedish child died as a result of physical abuse, only one was killed by parental hands in the period 1990–1996, and the number of children coming into care has decreased by 26% since 1982 (Durrant 2000). Compare this with Scotland’s figures (and make proportionate estimates for the whole UK), where 10 children died as a result of homicide in the year 2000 alone and the percentage of children subject to care and protection referrals increased by 238% between 1989 and 2000 (Scottish Executive 2000).In Britain as a whole, one to two children die every week from physical injuries inflicted by an adult (Chancellor 2000)."
"The evidence suggests that smacking is detrimental to child health and well-being and, in some cases, may be a catalyst for progressive abuse. It can, therefore, be argued that, although health and social care professionals have personal beliefs and attitudes about the use of smacking, it is both unprofessional and perhaps even unethical to allow these personal beliefs to influence practice. The logical inference is that, by giving inconsistent advice to parents about the use of smacking, health care professionals may inadvertently be contributing to the unacceptably high level of child abuse in the UK."
Well I'm certainly not impressed with what you've cited but thanks for the effort all the same. It's just a logical fallacy to take the outcomes of the children at the extreme of the distribution and use that to justify the effect on the median. Maybe the children didn't die from homicide because they committed suicide, which is more common in sweden than here.
So in short evidence that proves a point is easily dismissed if you don't agree with the poiny of view. And evidence to support your opinion isn't required as you are right?"I've defined exactly what evidence would prove the point being made, something ideolgues never do. That was just the rambling opinion of a left wing academic, i'll stick with the scientific method thanks. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
" I've defined exactly what evidence would prove the point being made, something ideolgues never do. That was just the rambling opinion of a left wing academic, i'll stick with the scientific method thanks." Actually she is a nurse scientist specialising in child maltreatment, according to her profile. Registered nurse, registered nurse teacher, and now a fellow of the Royal College of Nursing and the European Academy of Nursing Science. She is also "is a strong advocate of the use of theory in qualitative research". Her methodologies are listed as: - qualitative methods - RCT - systematic and other integrative reviews Pretty sure she knows more than you about 'the scientific method'. | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
" I've defined exactly what evidence would prove the point being made, something ideolgues never do. That was just the rambling opinion of a left wing academic, i'll stick with the scientific method thanks. Actually she is a nurse scientist specialising in child maltreatment, according to her profile. Registered nurse, registered nurse teacher, and now a fellow of the Royal College of Nursing and the European Academy of Nursing Science. She is also "is a strong advocate of the use of theory in qualitative research". Her methodologies are listed as: - qualitative methods - RCT - systematic and other integrative reviews Pretty sure she knows more than you about 'the scientific method'." Great, what were her statistical findings on the outcomes of the control group that wasn't smacked? | |||
(closed, thread got too big) | |||
| Reply privately |
| back to top |  |
