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How selfish are you on Fab?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I'm here for my own purposes but away from meets and filtering, I'm a giving person

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m very unselfish on here and in person, being selfish is a negative trait and not very attractive.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm here for my own purposes but away from meets and filtering, I'm a giving person "

I'll take your word for it.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

I'm no different when it comes to selfishness on here than I am in real life, which is mostly pretty unselfish, I think it's a pretty ugly trait to be honest and always brings out the worst in people.

There of course will always be those, in any situation, who are in it for themselves and no-one else and I try and avoid them as much as possible.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try to be inclusive on the forums, like to talk to everyone and anyone!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I try to be inclusive on the forums, like to talk to everyone and anyone!

"

Same here ... even if I get made to feel invisible by some which, actually, is a big compliment because a 5'11" big 'un like me rarely gets the chance to be invisible

I'm not at all selfish in "real life" either ... I have actually been told that I'm "too nice" for my own good ... didn't realise you could be

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

I'm completely selfish when it comes to the forums these days... But that's how I protect myself. I used to be more open, considerate, thoughtful... But just got walked on for it.

I'll save my giving nature for those who have earned it

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By *oxic1998Woman
over a year ago

Belfast

I think i give more than i receive. Even in my own life away from here and at times it becomes very apparent

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm completely selfish when it comes to the forums these days... But that's how I protect myself. I used to be more open, considerate, thoughtful... But just got walked on for it.

I'll save my giving nature for those who have earned it "

But that's then going to be part of the problem on Fab isn't it? Selfish is negative for something that's set up for everyone to be social.

This is the social side, meeting is the sex side.

How would I know your going to be unselfish when we meet? Who's paying for coffee?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I think i give more than i receive. Even in my own life away from here and at times it becomes very apparent "

Do you send more mail than you get in Fab?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not selfish at all, and I'm hopefully completely inclusive. I often get told I'm too nice, and often get taken advantage of because I am. But that's my nature and I'm too old to change.

But there are aspects of me that I'm totally selfish with, people only get to see the bits of me that I'm willing to share. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In the forums I like to address the room rather than quote individual replies, unless I really have to say something specific to one person.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"In the forums I like to address the room rather than quote individual replies, unless I really have to say something specific to one person. "

Addressing the forum....

That's a good example for good threads that include all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I talk to anyone especially on the forums.

I do have filters on but I do that to stop people wasting their time (and mine)

I have noticed that some people will only talk to certain people in the forum.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's one or two people on the forum's who seem to enjoy having little digs for no particular reason. Rolling eyes emoji's strategically placed and feigning ignorance to play innocent when they offend ect, you know the type. Those people I would say act selfishly, trying to undermine others often motivated by their own jealousy is a pretty selfish act on a public platform which is for everyone's enjoyment.

As for me, no I'm never ever selfish

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I talk to anyone especially on the forums.

I do have filters on but I do that to stop people wasting their time (and mine)

I have noticed that some people will only talk to certain people in the forum. "

I do understand that not everyone can or will be able to talk to everyone, but I agree, I've seen people get completely ignored Intentionally. Makes me wonder if I'd get ignored in a club with them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"There's one or two people on the forum's who seem to enjoy having little digs for no particular reason. Rolling eyes emoji's strategically placed and feigning ignorance to play innocent when they offend ect, you know the type. Those people I would say act selfishly, trying to undermine others often motivated by their own jealousy is a pretty selfish act on a public platform which is for everyone's enjoyment.

As for me, no I'm never ever selfish "

Oh gosh, the eyebroll . Used at the end of every f'kin post they display. Makes me wonder why they're not enjoying anything the read.

I hate watching anyone thinking they're more special than others, and I'd say most would agree with that.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"There's one or two people on the forum's who seem to enjoy having little digs for no particular reason. Rolling eyes emoji's strategically placed and feigning ignorance to play innocent when they offend ect, you know the type. Those people I would say act selfishly, trying to undermine others often motivated by their own jealousy is a pretty selfish act on a public platform which is for everyone's enjoyment.

As for me, no I'm never ever selfish "

Yep that's exactly the kind of behaviour that I dislike on the forums, especially when the whole sweetness and light "who me?" innocent act is rolled out if ever they're called out in it - as I said up thread I tend to try and avoid the perpetrators once I spot it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t lack consideration for others intentionally, in fact at times I’m mostly interested in how included people feel or trying to not negatively impact but.... I do use the forums for my personal pleasure and I’m sure that there are frequent occasions when I must impact negatively on someone — missed a reply post or my comment upset or similar. It’s hard to know how you’re being received all of the time, in fact someone called me paranoid for trying to check in if I had clipped them, so sometimes whatever you do it isn’t right. Then there are those that I do tend to think, ugh about — I’m human.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think i give more than i receive. Even in my own life away from here and at times it becomes very apparent "

Same. But ridiculously small things make me happy. So it kind of evens itself out.

I don't know if I'm selfish on here. It's a good question. I reply if people mail me. I don't waste people's time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that's probably for others to decide.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I talk to anyone especially on the forums.

I do have filters on but I do that to stop people wasting their time (and mine)

I have noticed that some people will only talk to certain people in the forum. "

I mostly reply to the words, not the people - if that makes sense. I do try to reply to/ quote other people that I don't usually. I need to work on this again. Good reminder, thanks. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not at all selfish.

I'll even give then two minutes to get their clothes back on before I kick them out

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By *ilent.KnightMan
over a year ago

Swindon


"In the forums I like to address the room rather than quote individual replies, unless I really have to say something specific to one person. "
Me too

Jk.. I’m the opposite (obvs) but that’s because I like to address specific points.

(Or more likely because I’m *trying* to be funny. Source: the above)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't say I was very selfish at all.

I try to include and encourage everyone on the forums and in chat. I hate to think of people feeling ignored.

I try to reply to people who have taken time to message me properly and I have very high tolerance so my block list is low.

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By *otSoNewWalesCoupleCouple
over a year ago

South Wales


"I have noticed that some people will only talk to certain people in the forum.

I do understand that not everyone can or will be able to talk to everyone, but I agree, I've seen people get completely ignored Intentionally. Makes me wonder if I'd get ignored in a club with them. "

Yup. The silly and snobby little cliques are the most amusing and pathetic aspect of Fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

"

I think it’s good practice to be kind to yourself and others.

If I know I won’t meet with someone I wish him happy adventures and then block. It saves us both time. Rejection isn’t nice for anyone. He might accidentally message again, only to get another rejection. And I don’t like having to explain why I’m not interested. It’s never going to be nice to hear is it?

What if it’s your face I’m not attracted to?! How do you say that to someone?! They can’t possibly change it.

Just kinder to block.

And I don’t care about anyone fabbing my pics.. I don’t look, and I don’t Fab anyone’s either. I’m here to meet.

Chat in the forums.. cause it’s good to hear differing points of view

The selfishness I’ve encountered from here has been more to do with meeting. Like when a guy cancels an hour/half hour before you’re due to meet...

Or if he only cares about his pleasure...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does it matter? If a person is selfish or not? As long as everyone is a having a good time, why should it matter?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do like to get involved in the forums and join in with my thoughts. I don't like thinking I havnt replied back to someone when I've been quoted but I do sometimes miss .

I will occasionally drop in a silly comment depending on my mood but it's usually ignored so doesn't impact much

I quite like to pick up on an old zero reply thread and then see it get lots more replies. I'm helpful like that

That's a lot of paragraphs starting with 'I' No I'm not selfish at all

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By *igerlilycubWoman
over a year ago

Lancashire

I don't think I'm selfish. I try to be nice to everyone until they aren't nice to me.

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination


"I'm completely selfish when it comes to the forums these days... But that's how I protect myself. I used to be more open, considerate, thoughtful... But just got walked on for it.

I'll save my giving nature for those who have earned it

But that's then going to be part of the problem on Fab isn't it? Selfish is negative for something that's set up for everyone to be social.

This is the social side, meeting is the sex side.

How would I know your going to be unselfish when we meet? Who's paying for coffee? "

I think its my turn... You bullied me into letting you pay last time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have noticed that some people will only talk to certain people in the forum.

I do understand that not everyone can or will be able to talk to everyone, but I agree, I've seen people get completely ignored Intentionally. Makes me wonder if I'd get ignored in a club with them.

Yup. The silly and snobby little cliques are the most amusing and pathetic aspect of Fab."

There’s a real clique of clique-accusers too. Have you noticed?

For every group accused of being a clique there’s a group accusing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't think I'm selfish. I try to be nice to everyone until they aren't nice to me.

"

This is the best way to live life, really - though on occasion kindness can overcome negativity within people as well if they're not used to being shown kindness and respect. I try to be kind to anyone I talk to, because I'd want them to be the same with me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have noticed that some people will only talk to certain people in the forum.

I do understand that not everyone can or will be able to talk to everyone, but I agree, I've seen people get completely ignored Intentionally. Makes me wonder if I'd get ignored in a club with them.

Yup. The silly and snobby little cliques are the most amusing and pathetic aspect of Fab.

There’s a real clique of clique-accusers too. Have you noticed?

For every group accused of being a clique there’s a group accusing. "

Bob Geldof says every time someone mentions a clique, a child in Africa dies.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have noticed that some people will only talk to certain people in the forum.

I do understand that not everyone can or will be able to talk to everyone, but I agree, I've seen people get completely ignored Intentionally. Makes me wonder if I'd get ignored in a club with them.

Yup. The silly and snobby little cliques are the most amusing and pathetic aspect of Fab.

There’s a real clique of clique-accusers too. Have you noticed?

For every group accused of being a clique there’s a group accusing.

Bob Geldof says every time someone mentions a clique, a child in Africa dies. "

I don’t find that funny.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would sooner put my neck on the line when the wolf pack comes out on here.

As I feel it's not a pleasant site to see.

That said I am guilty off plenty tongue in cheek replies that I know maybe taken as offensive.

Note to self:Must engage brain before fingers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't think I'm selfish. I try to be nice to everyone until they aren't nice to me.

This is the best way to live life, really - though on occasion kindness can overcome negativity within people as well if they're not used to being shown kindness and respect. I try to be kind to anyone I talk to, because I'd want them to be the same with me. "

I've been nice to people that were rude and many have apologised. People are often rude because someone else was rude to them. It's a cycle.

Everyone can have a bad day. A smile can be infectious.

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination


"I have noticed that some people will only talk to certain people in the forum.

I do understand that not everyone can or will be able to talk to everyone, but I agree, I've seen people get completely ignored Intentionally. Makes me wonder if I'd get ignored in a club with them.

Yup. The silly and snobby little cliques are the most amusing and pathetic aspect of Fab."

Cliques are often a matter of perception. Everyone has their lives to live outside of Fab, so when you do have a little time to spend on the forums, how do you prioritize how you spend it? Do you completely ignore people you've met and are friends with in order to make strangers feel more included? That hardly seems right... As with any situation, people who know each other are going to have more to say to each other, that doesn't mean they're excluding everyone else... Just acknowledging a prior friendship. I admit it can seem difficult to thrust yourself into the middle of that and be noticed when its all in full flow... but its not impossible

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In real life im not selfish but i no longer let people walk all over me and take advantage of my generally good nature. The only people that truly matter to me are my very close family and for them i would (and do) do anything.

On Fab and also on other swinger sites im selfish to a certain degree. Im not here to make friends or impress people, i/we are here for sex so if someone messeges that we aren't interested in then we will often reply no thanks then block them, i don't think that's selfish, just saves time. On the forums i'm not selfish but i don't try to gain friends with the way i post, however i do notice that various people on the forums respond very differently to me depending on which profile i'm using even if i post identical opinions !

I have a couple of people that i chat to via messeges (guys we have met and will meet again) and i'm definetly not selfish towards them and have infinate time for them.

If someone does wrong to me or my family anyway, ever, i never forget or forgive, maybe that's selfish but i prefer to think of it as self presevervation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have noticed that some people will only talk to certain people in the forum.

I do understand that not everyone can or will be able to talk to everyone, but I agree, I've seen people get completely ignored Intentionally. Makes me wonder if I'd get ignored in a club with them.

Yup. The silly and snobby little cliques are the most amusing and pathetic aspect of Fab.

There’s a real clique of clique-accusers too. Have you noticed?

For every group accused of being a clique there’s a group accusing.

Bob Geldof says every time someone mentions a clique, a child in Africa dies.

I don’t find that funny. "

Sorry

Not every joke I try is going to work - will scrub that one from Bob Monkhouse's book!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't think I'm selfish. I try to be nice to everyone until they aren't nice to me.

This is the best way to live life, really - though on occasion kindness can overcome negativity within people as well if they're not used to being shown kindness and respect. I try to be kind to anyone I talk to, because I'd want them to be the same with me.

I've been nice to people that were rude and many have apologised. People are often rude because someone else was rude to them. It's a cycle.

Everyone can have a bad day. A smile can be infectious. "

This is exactly it - I work in a high-pressure department so I try to keep spirits up by being the office joker, sometimes a good chuckle can make everyone's day that little bit better ^_^

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes "

Nice post pink

I'll make you a latte...put your feet up

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

Nice post pink

I'll make you a latte...put your feet up"

Could I have a chocolate instead?

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

In fab life as well as home life I don't believe I'm selfish at all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

Nice post pink

I'll make you a latte...put your feet up

Could I have a chocolate instead? "

Nah you can feck off yer cliquey fecker

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

Nice post pink

I'll make you a latte...put your feet up

Could I have a chocolate instead?

Nah you can feck off yer cliquey fecker "

Shit...in gage brain before fingers

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By *itmanAndHerrCouple
over a year ago

st helens


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

"

The only reason we have sex with people on this site is because we decide we want to have sex with them. No one is going to do anyone a favour so everyone joined this site for selfish reasons. The only time we become unselfish is with the people who we meet in person.

We have no interest in our pictures being fabbed. Fabbing pics is a pointless ego stroking exercise although we do fab pics which are artistic.

We use the forums for various reasons. Entertainment, information and sometimes boredom. We do get involved in the threads but alot of them are repetitive and childish.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes "

There are people that post identical comments to other "popular" forum posters that get ignored completely wheres the "popular" people get endless replies. That makes the forum and some forum users seem selfish. It also means that the pool of people posting never really improves because people feel dispirated and don't bother to post if they get ignored all the time. They have probably made a fair amount of effort to no avail too. As i have already said, i find i get a hugely different reaction to what i post depending on which profile i use, even if i've posted the same response and made the same effort.

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By *ilent.KnightMan
over a year ago

Swindon

I suspect the popular kids get many replies directed at them, and would spend all their time replying to them, so choose which. Kinda like the whole “no one replies to my messages” thread.

The joy of the forum is you can, as MissWilkes says, reply to the room. While the cliques may not engage the noncliques can .... and then everyone is a winner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

There are people that post identical comments to other "popular" forum posters that get ignored completely wheres the "popular" people get endless replies. That makes the forum and some forum users seem selfish. It also means that the pool of people posting never really improves because people feel dispirated and don't bother to post if they get ignored all the time. They have probably made a fair amount of effort to no avail too. As i have already said, i find i get a hugely different reaction to what i post depending on which profile i use, even if i've posted the same response and made the same effort."

Ok here it is.

I have a kodi thread as you know. And it doesn't matter who posts on it..I will always take the time to reply if I can be of any help

This often involves more then a quick random reply...depending on the question

But on a lot of the threads on the forum are fast paced and to keep up it means at times some will get overlooked.

This on my part is not intentional as I sometimes struggling to keep up.

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

Nice post pink

I'll make you a latte...put your feet up

Could I have a chocolate instead?

Nah you can feck off yer cliquey fecker

Shit...in gage brain before fingers "

Stop eye rolling I get in trouble if I join in

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I think that's probably for others to decide.

"

What do you think they'd say?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What you mean selfish ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m not selfish in anything I do

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

The only reason we have sex with people on this site is because we decide we want to have sex with them. No one is going to do anyone a favour so everyone joined this site for selfish reasons. The only time we become unselfish is with the people who we meet in person.

We have no interest in our pictures being fabbed. Fabbing pics is a pointless ego stroking exercise although we do fab pics which are artistic.

We use the forums for various reasons. Entertainment, information and sometimes boredom. We do get involved in the threads but alot of them are repetitive and childish. "

Is this the male?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What you mean selfish ?? "

I read a lot people say 'I'm here only for me and no-one else' etc, and my question is specifically how we act around Fab.

How can you appear aproachable when it sounds like your a selfish git?

That's what I mean. Are you selfish the way you use Fab?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m not selfish in anything I do"

Neither am I.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

Nice post pink

I'll make you a latte...put your feet up

Could I have a chocolate instead?

Nah you can feck off yer cliquey fecker

Shit...in gage brain before fingers

Stop eye rolling I get in trouble if I join in "

Ok

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

There are people that post identical comments to other "popular" forum posters that get ignored completely wheres the "popular" people get endless replies. That makes the forum and some forum users seem selfish. It also means that the pool of people posting never really improves because people feel dispirated and don't bother to post if they get ignored all the time. They have probably made a fair amount of effort to no avail too. As i have already said, i find i get a hugely different reaction to what i post depending on which profile i use, even if i've posted the same response and made the same effort."

I was a newbie, didn’t show verifications, wasn’t photo verified and a silhouette. On paper forum suicide. Yes I had posts that were ignored but probably because it was of no interest to anyone. I didn’t think it was anything other than that, I don’t find every post of interest either. So I just posted/post where I wanted/want. If I want something that isn’t there I start a thread, ppl either join in or they don’t. Rise above it and keep going, however the forum isn’t for everyone. This is what ppl seem to forget, I feel uncomfortable in certain places in the real word, that is no different in the cyber world. Is that down to others or me? Certain personalities work well on the forum some don’t, just like in real world environments

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By *itmanAndHerrCouple
over a year ago

st helens


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

The only reason we have sex with people on this site is because we decide we want to have sex with them. No one is going to do anyone a favour so everyone joined this site for selfish reasons. The only time we become unselfish is with the people who we meet in person.

We have no interest in our pictures being fabbed. Fabbing pics is a pointless ego stroking exercise although we do fab pics which are artistic.

We use the forums for various reasons. Entertainment, information and sometimes boredom. We do get involved in the threads but alot of them are repetitive and childish.

Is this the male? "

Yes. Tis i

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m not selfish in anything I do

Neither am I. "

I can tell

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I suspect the popular kids get many replies directed at them, and would spend all their time replying to them, so choose which. Kinda like the whole “no one replies to my messages” thread.

The joy of the forum is you can, as MissWilkes says, reply to the room. While the cliques may not engage the noncliques can .... and then everyone is a winner. "

Did you mention clique?

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By *ilent.KnightMan
over a year ago

Swindon


"I suspect the popular kids get many replies directed at them, and would spend all their time replying to them, so choose which. Kinda like the whole “no one replies to my messages” thread.

The joy of the forum is you can, as MissWilkes says, reply to the room. While the cliques may not engage the noncliques can .... and then everyone is a winner.

Did you mention clique?

"

. Spellchecker. I meant cliques.

But it’s okay. I’m clapping my hands Peter Pan style.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it selfish or just the nature of fast moving internet environment?

I use Fabs as to how it suits me best, that might not suit the next person but it's dawned on me over time expectations of interaction message or forum wise isn't as high as I intially thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

"

What a very weird concept. We are all on here for our own self-interest. If any of us were completely unselfish/selfless, then we wouldn't have preferences, and we'd all be content to give out sympathy shags.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

What a very weird concept. We are all on here for our own self-interest. If any of us were completely unselfish/selfless, then we wouldn't have preferences, and we'd all be content to give out sympathy shags."

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

What a very weird concept. We are all on here for our own self-interest. If any of us were completely unselfish/selfless, then we wouldn't have preferences, and we'd all be content to give out sympathy shags."

Post of the day right there

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

I'm selfish with food

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By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

I try really hard not to come across as selfish on the forums. Sometimes too hard because in my efforts to compose a firm but fair response I often find the conversation's moved on too far for my contribution to make any sense (and that eye roll was directed at myself!). One thing I would say though is that I struggle hugely with social interaction in the real world and often get things wrong because I've misread cues, missed when someone's upset and misjudged what someone does or doesn't want to hear - and that's led to me being accused of selfishness on occasion though that's never been my intention. I've no reason to believe that couldn't also happen here on Fab because I don't try to alter my character online ... and I'm sure there must be others here too with similar traits to me who don't want to be 'selfish' but who genuinely don't always recognise when they are being, if that makes sense?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I try really hard not to come across as selfish on the forums. Sometimes too hard because in my efforts to compose a firm but fair response I often find the conversation's moved on too far for my contribution to make any sense (and that eye roll was directed at myself!). One thing I would say though is that I struggle hugely with social interaction in the real world and often get things wrong because I've misread cues, missed when someone's upset and misjudged what someone does or doesn't want to hear - and that's led to me being accused of selfishness on occasion though that's never been my intention. I've no reason to believe that couldn't also happen here on Fab because I don't try to alter my character online ... and I'm sure there must be others here too with similar traits to me who don't want to be 'selfish' but who genuinely don't always recognise when they are being, if that makes sense? "

Makes sense to me

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"I'm selfish with food "

Just food you don’t like sharing?

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"I'm selfish with food

Just food you don’t like sharing? "

What are you implying?

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"I'm selfish with food

Just food you don’t like sharing?

What are you implying?"

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"I'm selfish with food

Just food you don’t like sharing?

What are you implying?

"

hilarious so you are.

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"I'm selfish with food

Just food you don’t like sharing?

What are you implying?

hilarious so you are."

Uh oh that’s you on MisterBee’s naughty list, you did an eye roll

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

What a very weird concept. We are all on here for our own self-interest. If any of us were completely unselfish/selfless, then we wouldn't have preferences, and we'd all be content to give out sympathy shags.

Post of the day right there "

Awww thank you.

I'll continue

If someone sacrifices something to please another, it is a very unselfish/selfless act. If someone gets pleasure from pleasing someone, it is NOT a selfless act and selfishness doesn't come into the equation. If someone doesn't give a shit about another then it is, of course selfish.

When communicating on the forum, it's a high probability selfishness doesn't come into it. I can categorically say i have never seen sacrifices made in this virtual world. There might be elements of nastiness or kindness, shit-stirring or protectiveness. We might see elements of empathy or narcissism or even sociopathy but ultimately we are only seeing a snapshot of that person.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"I'm selfish with food

Just food you don’t like sharing?

What are you implying?

hilarious so you are.

Uh oh that’s you on MisterBee’s naughty list, you did an eye roll "

I was there already. Wait I think I know what you are referring to my sharing. Depends if you are sharing yours which I very much doubt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I try really hard not to come across as selfish on the forums. Sometimes too hard because in my efforts to compose a firm but fair response I often find the conversation's moved on too far for my contribution to make any sense (and that eye roll was directed at myself!). One thing I would say though is that I struggle hugely with social interaction in the real world and often get things wrong because I've misread cues, missed when someone's upset and misjudged what someone does or doesn't want to hear - and that's led to me being accused of selfishness on occasion though that's never been my intention. I've no reason to believe that couldn't also happen here on Fab because I don't try to alter my character online ... and I'm sure there must be others here too with similar traits to me who don't want to be 'selfish' but who genuinely don't always recognise when they are being, if that makes sense? "

Yes that makes sense to me too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

What a very weird concept. We are all on here for our own self-interest. If any of us were completely unselfish/selfless, then we wouldn't have preferences, and we'd all be content to give out sympathy shags.

Post of the day right there

Awww thank you.

I'll continue

If someone sacrifices something to please another, it is a very unselfish/selfless act. If someone gets pleasure from pleasing someone, it is NOT a selfless act and selfishness doesn't come into the equation. If someone doesn't give a shit about another then it is, of course selfish.

When communicating on the forum, it's a high probability selfishness doesn't come into it. I can categorically say i have never seen sacrifices made in this virtual world. There might be elements of nastiness or kindness, shit-stirring or protectiveness. We might see elements of empathy or narcissism or even sociopathy but ultimately we are only seeing a snapshot of that person.

"

I guess what I'm saying is that the title of the thread is simply a poor choice of words. Perhaps it would be better to ask how kind you are on Fab.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

What a very weird concept. We are all on here for our own self-interest. If any of us were completely unselfish/selfless, then we wouldn't have preferences, and we'd all be content to give out sympathy shags.

Post of the day right there

Awww thank you.

I'll continue

If someone sacrifices something to please another, it is a very unselfish/selfless act. If someone gets pleasure from pleasing someone, it is NOT a selfless act and selfishness doesn't come into the equation. If someone doesn't give a shit about another then it is, of course selfish.

When communicating on the forum, it's a high probability selfishness doesn't come into it. I can categorically say i have never seen sacrifices made in this virtual world. There might be elements of nastiness or kindness, shit-stirring or protectiveness. We might see elements of empathy or narcissism or even sociopathy but ultimately we are only seeing a snapshot of that person.

I guess what I'm saying is that the title of the thread is simply a poor choice of words. Perhaps it would be better to ask how kind you are on Fab."

With that title, everyone would boast how good they are. I wanted to make it clear, I think we are all a little selfish.

I point you to my thread yesterday when people were pointing out how much they enjoy giving during sex.

Again, why would I approach someone for sex, when I think your selfish?

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"I'm selfish with food

Just food you don’t like sharing?

What are you implying?

hilarious so you are.

Uh oh that’s you on MisterBee’s naughty list, you did an eye roll

I was there already. Wait I think I know what you are referring to my sharing. Depends if you are sharing yours which I very much doubt "

Nope I’m definitely not sharing, I’m very selfish in that respect but it’s reciprocal so maybe not selfish?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

What a very weird concept. We are all on here for our own self-interest. If any of us were completely unselfish/selfless, then we wouldn't have preferences, and we'd all be content to give out sympathy shags.

Post of the day right there

Awww thank you.

I'll continue

If someone sacrifices something to please another, it is a very unselfish/selfless act. If someone gets pleasure from pleasing someone, it is NOT a selfless act and selfishness doesn't come into the equation. If someone doesn't give a shit about another then it is, of course selfish.

When communicating on the forum, it's a high probability selfishness doesn't come into it. I can categorically say i have never seen sacrifices made in this virtual world. There might be elements of nastiness or kindness, shit-stirring or protectiveness. We might see elements of empathy or narcissism or even sociopathy but ultimately we are only seeing a snapshot of that person.

I guess what I'm saying is that the title of the thread is simply a poor choice of words. Perhaps it would be better to ask how kind you are on Fab.

With that title, everyone would boast how good they are. I wanted to make it clear, I think we are all a little selfish.

I point you to my thread yesterday when people were pointing out how much they enjoy giving during sex.

Again, why would I approach someone for sex, when I think your selfish? "

Well that clearly worked cos everybody is replying in the same vein, " I'm unselfish" .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think that's probably for others to decide.

What do you think they'd say? "

Truth I don't know. And maybe it's too scary to ask.

I do try not to offend others but probably fail dismally. And I'm not really what some call the popular people or the infamous "clique" or none clique...not that I see that as anything more than a group that probably know each other better than they know me. Geography doesn't help with that I know.

Much of what I post is tongue in cheek or related to some of the occasional more interesting threads to me than the daily look at me stuff.

I think that maybe most people don't like to think of themselves as having negative traits even though we all do.

So I hope I'm not selfish but I would say that wouldn't I and perhaps that's why it's other people's judgement of me is more important than mine... after all it's their judgement of me that in some ways decides if I'm accepted here or anywhere else and something I have little control over other than just being me...and hoping I'm not a complete twunt.

Maybe I should have done what I often do... type this out then just delete rather than posting it.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"I'm selfish with food

Just food you don’t like sharing?

What are you implying?

hilarious so you are.

Uh oh that’s you on MisterBee’s naughty list, you did an eye roll

I was there already. Wait I think I know what you are referring to my sharing. Depends if you are sharing yours which I very much doubt

Nope I’m definitely not sharing, I’m very selfish in that respect but it’s reciprocal so maybe not selfish? "

I was talking about chocolate.

Cute though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm generally talking about how you use Fab and the forums.

So after most admit that when we meet for sex were very unselfish and like to please the other person, sometimes there pleasure is what gets us off. I think that's true within myself.

Do we go out of our way to be unselfish on Fab? How Inclusive are we?

When you block someone, 'to save time in the future' or delete unread messages, maybe join a 'Fab pictures Thursday thread' with no intention of fabbing anyone else's. Begging for fabs on statuses etc,

Are there any other examples when you think selfishness does creep in?

"

I'm

Here for my own gratification not others!

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"I'm selfish with food

Just food you don’t like sharing?

What are you implying?

hilarious so you are.

Uh oh that’s you on MisterBee’s naughty list, you did an eye roll

I was there already. Wait I think I know what you are referring to my sharing. Depends if you are sharing yours which I very much doubt

Nope I’m definitely not sharing, I’m very selfish in that respect but it’s reciprocal so maybe not selfish?

I was talking about chocolate.

Cute though."

I was talking about cake, it said it doesn’t want to be shared

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"I'm selfish with food

Just food you don’t like sharing?

What are you implying?

hilarious so you are.

Uh oh that’s you on MisterBee’s naughty list, you did an eye roll

I was there already. Wait I think I know what you are referring to my sharing. Depends if you are sharing yours which I very much doubt

Nope I’m definitely not sharing, I’m very selfish in that respect but it’s reciprocal so maybe not selfish?

I was talking about chocolate.

Cute though.

I was talking about cake, it said it doesn’t want to be shared "

Yeah. Neither does my chocolate. It just pretends to make people feel good about themselves. Full of endorphins

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"I'm selfish with food

Just food you don’t like sharing?

What are you implying?

hilarious so you are.

Uh oh that’s you on MisterBee’s naughty list, you did an eye roll

I was there already. Wait I think I know what you are referring to my sharing. Depends if you are sharing yours which I very much doubt

Nope I’m definitely not sharing, I’m very selfish in that respect but it’s reciprocal so maybe not selfish?

I was talking about chocolate.

Cute though.

I was talking about cake, it said it doesn’t want to be shared

Yeah. Neither does my chocolate. It just pretends to make people feel good about themselves. Full of endorphins "

How selfless

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"I'm selfish with food

Just food you don’t like sharing?

What are you implying?

hilarious so you are.

Uh oh that’s you on MisterBee’s naughty list, you did an eye roll

I was there already. Wait I think I know what you are referring to my sharing. Depends if you are sharing yours which I very much doubt

Nope I’m definitely not sharing, I’m very selfish in that respect but it’s reciprocal so maybe not selfish?

I was talking about chocolate.

Cute though.

I was talking about cake, it said it doesn’t want to be shared

Yeah. Neither does my chocolate. It just pretends to make people feel good about themselves. Full of endorphins

How selfless "

Good old galaxy

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By *oward1978Man
over a year ago

Rotherham

Well, firstly I must say that my personality is the same whether I'm online or in everyday life. And it's certainly never my intention to come across as selfish. I think in truth I'm the most unselfish person you could imagine. But my personality is such that I can definitely come across as quite stand-offish or aloof. That'll just my natural quietness and lack of confidence showing through though. I don't really do chit-chatty stuff and have always found it near impossible to join in with others in social activities, and that tends to be the case whether I'm on Fab or in my everyday life. And on the forums that means there's some threads I'll simply avoid because of this. So whilst I'm not trying to come across as selfish or self-centred I could understand why someone may see me as such. They'd be wrong though. They simply don't know me. In fact one of my problems is probably that I don't put myself first enough of the time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

There are people that post identical comments to other "popular" forum posters that get ignored completely wheres the "popular" people get endless replies. That makes the forum and some forum users seem selfish. It also means that the pool of people posting never really improves because people feel dispirated and don't bother to post if they get ignored all the time. They have probably made a fair amount of effort to no avail too. As i have already said, i find i get a hugely different reaction to what i post depending on which profile i use, even if i've posted the same response and made the same effort.

Ok here it is.

I have a kodi thread as you know. And it doesn't matter who posts on it..I will always take the time to reply if I can be of any help

This often involves more then a quick random reply...depending on the question

But on a lot of the threads on the forum are fast paced and to keep up it means at times some will get overlooked.

This on my part is not intentional as I sometimes struggling to keep up."

My comment wasn't aimed at you at all. You are very inclusive

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

There are people that post identical comments to other "popular" forum posters that get ignored completely wheres the "popular" people get endless replies. That makes the forum and some forum users seem selfish. It also means that the pool of people posting never really improves because people feel dispirated and don't bother to post if they get ignored all the time. They have probably made a fair amount of effort to no avail too. As i have already said, i find i get a hugely different reaction to what i post depending on which profile i use, even if i've posted the same response and made the same effort.

Ok here it is.

I have a kodi thread as you know. And it doesn't matter who posts on it..I will always take the time to reply if I can be of any help

This often involves more then a quick random reply...depending on the question

But on a lot of the threads on the forum are fast paced and to keep up it means at times some will get overlooked.

This on my part is not intentional as I sometimes struggling to keep up.

My comment wasn't aimed at you at all. You are very inclusive "

Yeah eye rolling for everyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

There are people that post identical comments to other "popular" forum posters that get ignored completely wheres the "popular" people get endless replies. That makes the forum and some forum users seem selfish. It also means that the pool of people posting never really improves because people feel dispirated and don't bother to post if they get ignored all the time. They have probably made a fair amount of effort to no avail too. As i have already said, i find i get a hugely different reaction to what i post depending on which profile i use, even if i've posted the same response and made the same effort.

I was a newbie, didn’t show verifications, wasn’t photo verified and a silhouette. On paper forum suicide. Yes I had posts that were ignored but probably because it was of no interest to anyone. I didn’t think it was anything other than that, I don’t find every post of interest either. So I just posted/post where I wanted/want. If I want something that isn’t there I start a thread, ppl either join in or they don’t. Rise above it and keep going, however the forum isn’t for everyone. This is what ppl seem to forget, I feel uncomfortable in certain places in the real word, that is no different in the cyber world. Is that down to others or me? Certain personalities work well on the forum some don’t, just like in real world environments "

Oh yes i get that but others are often put off if they feel they are always ignored and some feel that the forum is unfriendly at times hence they don't post. My comments are what people have said to me when i've suggested they use the forums as a way of getting to know people. My own use of the forums is fine as we not interested in anything other than being here to meet guys for sex lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Aw ffs we can all be selfish feckers whether you think your in a clique or not.

Yes on a good day in real life as well as here...I'll go out of my way to help people..but I can have a bad day and think feck em all!

Am I selfish for this?

Am I unique?

I think not...more in the 99.9% of the populous.

So my point as we all moan and you don't fecking need to be in any club to do it!

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

I think how a person views their own behaviour can be incredibly different to those on the outside - especially going by some of the posts and the posters on this thread! Perception is a wonderful thing.

I'd actually say most forum users are selfish to a certain extent - they will only interact with those they feel comfortable with, interact in set ways with certain people etc. I don't think forums are a place for 'selfless' acts in all honesty and I've only seen a couple of posters do these in my years on here. Consideration only tends to be shown in as much as it favours the poster if that makes sense?

Am I selfish? Yes, to an extent. If I start a thread I want to read as many different responses as possible, if I'm replying to one I will tend to interact with those I like.

I am trying to be more aware of others and check in to make sure that I've not been misconstrued or caused offence by framing an incorrect narractive upon others and I guess that's not selfish.

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"Yes, I eye roll and yes MisterBee has pulled me up on it. For the most part my eye rolls are aimed at those I have a Fab friendship with and they know I’m joking. However, I know I use them in a negative way on occasions. Is that selfish? No more selfish than the person that has made a negative comment that I’m responding to, invariably ‘clique’ related. To me that is one of the most selfish posts on the forum. Why? Because it’s negative and divisive and there becomes a them and us. When I joined the forum I saw friendships not a clique. Watching their banter and interaction was hilarious. Yes those friendships at times were toxic to the forum. That’s the selfish part. I feel that’s changed considerably over the time I’ve been on the forum. The dynamics have changed, friendships have shifted. I won’t apologise for having friends or accept that it’s selfish. I put the effort in because I wanted to be part of the forum. I love the interaction and banter, I try not to be selfish and it makes me sad when others are. Yesterday the lounge chat was accused of being for the ‘popular’ people. What’s actually happened is it’s become populated by the frequent users of the forum who are responded to regularly on threads. Why are they ‘popular’? Because they’re frequent users and have made friends. So there we have it, it’s not a clique, it’s those who value the forum and the people in it. They’ve made an effort to belong and interact without whining, just as I did not so long ago. Those people work hard to keep the forum alive, that’s not selfish in my eyes

There are people that post identical comments to other "popular" forum posters that get ignored completely wheres the "popular" people get endless replies. That makes the forum and some forum users seem selfish. It also means that the pool of people posting never really improves because people feel dispirated and don't bother to post if they get ignored all the time. They have probably made a fair amount of effort to no avail too. As i have already said, i find i get a hugely different reaction to what i post depending on which profile i use, even if i've posted the same response and made the same effort.

I was a newbie, didn’t show verifications, wasn’t photo verified and a silhouette. On paper forum suicide. Yes I had posts that were ignored but probably because it was of no interest to anyone. I didn’t think it was anything other than that, I don’t find every post of interest either. So I just posted/post where I wanted/want. If I want something that isn’t there I start a thread, ppl either join in or they don’t. Rise above it and keep going, however the forum isn’t for everyone. This is what ppl seem to forget, I feel uncomfortable in certain places in the real word, that is no different in the cyber world. Is that down to others or me? Certain personalities work well on the forum some don’t, just like in real world environments

Oh yes i get that but others are often put off if they feel they are always ignored and some feel that the forum is unfriendly at times hence they don't post. My comments are what people have said to me when i've suggested they use the forums as a way of getting to know people. My own use of the forums is fine as we not interested in anything other than being here to meet guys for sex lol"

I think you’ve hit on another problem, anyone expecting/wanting meets from the forum and being ignored is going to be even more frustrating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Aw ffs we can all be selfish feckers whether you think your in a clique or not.

Yes on a good day in real life as well as here...I'll go out of my way to help people..but I can have a bad day and think feck em all!

Am I selfish for this?

Am I unique?

I think not...more in the 99.9% of the populous.

So my point as we all moan and you don't fecking need to be in any club to do it!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally, I think I'm generous to a fault, haven't had chance to prove it though, but generous nevertheless!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm as selfish as it gets

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