FabSwingers.com forum: People on sex/ swinging sites

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve never wanted sex 24/7

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I don't think so. There are only certain people I'll talk to outside of fab that has sex as the topic of conversation. There are people who I know from the outside world who have seen me on here though, and even though we have worked together in the past, they now only seem to think I'm worthy of sex talk, which is quite annoying.

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By *horltzMan
over a year ago

heysham

I keep the two separate

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By *uckOfTheBayMan
over a year ago

Mold

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour? "

Can you define normal and decent behaviour?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't think so. There are only certain people I'll talk to outside of fab that has sex as the topic of conversation.

**There are people who I know from the outside world who have seen me on here though, and even though we have worked together in the past, they now only seem to think I'm worthy of sex talk, which is quite annoying."

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

We both work with the public and certainly never mix this world and that one. Same with our vanilla friends ... we never behave as if we are swingers.

No one outside the lifestyle knows we are swingers and that's how we like it .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have to be very careful when I’m in the fruit and veg aisle at Tesco’s.

Checking out which aubergine or marrow would be suitable for my next pic on here isn’t the done thing apparently

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

Yup. This is not normal lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one outside of fab knows I'm a swinger. I don't discuss this with anyone. If me and my friends talk about sex then it's just a general girls talk thing. I certainly don't want sex 24/7 x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour? "

i was thinking about this last night funnily enough and then i though about dating after/during swinging too

is that ever the same

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 25/10/17 11:27:34]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've got one friend who knows everything and I talk very openly about this with. Other than that I do try and be 'normal'

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour? "

Yes, it does. I started typing out the examples of attitudes that illustrate this but there were too many.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Even on Fab there is a degree of normality compared to some.

Non conformists have character which has what built this colourful world of ours.

If nobody stepped outside the box, pushed themselves, explored their boundaries, normal would be very bland.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Even on Fab there is a degree of normality compared to some.

Non conformists have character which has what built this colourful world of ours.

If nobody stepped outside the box, pushed themselves, explored their boundaries, normal would be very bland. "

I think this is more about the people who mistake the fantasy element of fab for reality. For example the number of threads from men who assume that friendliness from a woman means she's interested in sex or the guy who because his partner enjoys variety in their sex life assumes she wants a gang bang. I'm sorry to use men in both my examples but in my experience it usually is the guys who think because they read a fantasy about flashing think it's ok to openly wank in their front room window.

We've found that since being on Fab we've become inured to lots of things that our friends find shocking.

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By *rNaughtyNickMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"No one outside of fab knows I'm a swinger. I don't discuss this with anyone. If me and my friends talk about sex then it's just a general girls talk thing. I certainly don't want sex 24/7 x "

This ^^^

Society is quick to be very judgmental of peoples behaviour and being on a sex site is no different.

On the forums there are plenty of nonsex chat topics and people can engage in variety on conversations.

Yes we can be flirty but who isn't ?

With fab its good that you can communicate with people who are on a similar level and have the same open attitude towards sex as each other.

Even tho some people are filthier than others

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour? "

We think it helps free some people from the controlling motivated or religious based limitations 'normality' attempts to enforce on your sex life.

Is that a warped view? Only if it is deemed acceptable to limit consensual sexual liberation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fab is a swinging site, id be surprised not to find a subject/topic of sex, even if in the lounge.

If I wanted to talk about what tv I should get, id be in a gadget forum (politics the politics forum) if I wanted to talk about football or what food your eating, I'd log onto Facebook.

I don't need to talk about sex 24hrs a day, but there is a theme on Here.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour?

i was thinking about this last night funnily enough and then i though about dating after/during swinging too

is that ever the same"

I don't think so. I'm used to being able to talk openly with my friend about sex. But it would feel strange having to be 'reserved' and avoid appearing too keen on sex with someone new, as I know that many men would feel that is slutty behaviour. I also know this means that we wouldn't be compatible, but how can you assess compatibility without first talking?

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"Fab is a swinging site, id be surprised not to find a subject/topic of sex, even if in the lounge.

If I wanted to talk about what tv I should get, id be in a gadget forum (politics the politics forum) if I wanted to talk about football or what food your eating, I'd log onto Facebook.

I don't need to talk about sex 24hrs a day, but there is a theme on Here.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Even on Fab there is a degree of normality compared to some.

Non conformists have character which has what built this colourful world of ours.

If nobody stepped outside the box, pushed themselves, explored their boundaries, normal would be very bland.

We've found that since being on Fab we've become inured to lots of things that our friends find shocking."

Yes exactly this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Even on Fab there is a degree of normality compared to some.

Non conformists have character which has what built this colourful world of ours.

If nobody stepped outside the box, pushed themselves, explored their boundaries, normal would be very bland.

We've found that since being on Fab we've become inured to lots of things that our friends find shocking."

Totally agree. This is morphing very similar into another thread in the Lounge.

Fab is not normal. Then neither are swinging clubs. Both sexes are culpable of behaving differently to what they would do in the local pub. A lot of women suffer from Fabitis where a lot of men thInk every women is fair game.

I was mainly referring to normality in general. Even in my vanilla life I have pushed boundaries in non sexual areas.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Even on Fab there is a degree of normality compared to some.

Non conformists have character which has what built this colourful world of ours.

If nobody stepped outside the box, pushed themselves, explored their boundaries, normal would be very bland.

We've found that since being on Fab we've become inured to lots of things that our friends find shocking.

Totally agree. This is morphing very similar into another thread in the Lounge.

I was mainly referring to normality in general. Even in my vanilla life I have pushed boundaries in non sexual areas. "

Which thread?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour? "

I don't think this is true in any way.

For one thing do you think people who are not on this site think any less about sex?

As for swingers in particular I think a significant number actually feel they need to compensate for their debauchery by demonstrating their high morals in other ways.

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

I'm on here, and whilst I may have sex with people, I rarely choose to talk about it, either with other people from her or my aquaintances who aren't here.

It's rather a dull topic of conversation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm on here, and whilst I may have sex with people, I rarely choose to talk about it, either with other people from her or my aquaintances who aren't here.

It's rather a dull topic of conversation. "

Same. Never discussed sex life before swinging. Even less likely to discuss it since!

I think those people who like to talk about it will do so regardless of whether they are on sites like this.

One of the things I like most is listening to people talk shit about sex while thinking 'if only they knew'.

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

"I'm on here, and whilst I may have sex with people, I rarely choose to talk about it, either with other people from her or my aquaintances who aren't here.

It's rather a dull topic of conversation.

Same. Never discussed sex life before swinging. Even less likely to discuss it since!

I think those people who like to talk about it will do so regardless of whether they are on sites like this.

One of the things I like most is listening to people talk shit about sex while thinking 'if only they knew'."

Quite.

My sex life (or lack therof

) is my business, and hence why I dislike verifications and now refuse to display mine.

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

This part of my life is no different to my ‘nilla life except there is less sex here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only one person currently outside of fab who knows about me and this lifestyle is the guy who introduced me to the site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Even on Fab there is a degree of normality compared to some.

Non conformists have character which has what built this colourful world of ours.

If nobody stepped outside the box, pushed themselves, explored their boundaries, normal would be very bland.

We've found that since being on Fab we've become inured to lots of things that our friends find shocking."

I agree with you. But I also think that many people learn things by being on this site (forums predominantly) too, that maybe outside of Fab they may not get "gently hammered" into learning -- topics that may include safe sex, consent or being called out on unacceptable behaviour etc. Or that they're not alone when upset or distressed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

easy to get blase about fab stuff but still keep separate from life off it - not a lot shocks me anymore i might add

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour? "

It’s because the site and users got it wrong when it comes to swingers.

They don’t know what swinging actually is!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour?

It’s because the site and users got it wrong when it comes to swingers.

They don’t know what swinging actually is!

What is it?

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

It’s the difference

There are dating sites, then sex sites then swinging sites.

They are all completely different.

That’s the mistake that is leading to The confusion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s the difference

There are dating sites, then sex sites then swinging sites.

They are all completely different.

That’s the mistake that is leading to The confusion."

And yet this site neatly covers all of the above

(like it or not)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that sometimes they try to tell others how to do it properly. Their proper way.

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

"It’s the difference

There are dating sites, then sex sites then swinging sites.

They are all completely different.

That’s the mistake that is leading to The confusion.

And yet this site neatly covers all of the above

(like it or not)"

I think they all do.

What people repeatedly fail to realise on here (and elsewhere) is that the internet is a communication medium, nothing more. Certainly websites can try and impose a theme, but people will still discuss whatever they please.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think my OP has been misunderstood.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I think my OP has been misunderstood. "

I understood.

Being on Fab skews some people's view of reality. They think that the unreal world of a site where one of the primary purposes is to hook up for sex and people happily post photos of themselves naked is "normal".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think my OP has been misunderstood. "

Went off track a bit.

I do believe that some think because I'm logged on here I'm horny and open to sexual conversation. Even when I keep it to non-sexual replies they try to steer the conversation towards sexual. I have to explain that I'm not on here because my fanny is telling me to look for something to fill it right now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't do sex chat on here and don't want crude pics and don't send them. I'm not here very often and don't give this site a second thought when not on or looking for a meet. I think going by some of the posts that people are on here 24/7 and it's their life. Thats fine but not for me x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think my OP has been misunderstood.

I understood.

Then new people join, see all the nakedness and think we are all depraved and need to fuck now.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I think my OP has been misunderstood.

Went off track a bit.

I think it's more about the guys (sorry again but it usually) who start thinking that everyone is like fab people. So if a female colleague is friendly to them for instance it must mean she wants to have sex with him and all he needs to do is find the right words to ask.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I think my OP has been misunderstood.

I understood.

Then new people join, see all the nakedness and think we are all depraved and need to fuck now. "

Not just the new ones. They think that everyone is like that even off fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think my OP has been misunderstood.

Went off track a bit.

One track mind syndrome.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

LOL. I have to laugh at anyone who thinks Fab is deviant central. You could maybe make that suggestion for those who attend swingers parties but even then I have noticed that many people I have run into on the scene seem to be just as routine as the people outside it.

TBH I actually think that at least 80% of this site is all talk. People here for chatting, fantasizing and socializing. When they do meet its with a single partner or, at best, in a threesome scenario.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I think my OP has been misunderstood.

Went off track a bit.

One track mind syndrome."

Sort of. More inability to differentiate between real life and fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"LOL. I have to laugh at anyone who thinks Fab is deviant central. You could maybe make that suggestion for those who attend swingers parties but even then I have noticed that many people I have run into on the scene seem to be just as routine as the people outside it.

Should we be having orgies?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think my OP has been misunderstood.

Went off track a bit.

One track mind syndrome.

Sort of. More inability to differentiate between real life and fab."

I get you now.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Should we be having orgies? "

It's late and I have to be up in a few hours can we have an orgy another time?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Should we be having orgies?

It's late and I have to be up in a few hours can we have an orgy another time?

Rain check

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Should we be having orgies?

It's late and I have to be up in a few hours can we have an orgy another time?

Rain check

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By *otgirl32Woman
over a year ago

Ashton Under Lyne

Slightly dissenting view here (I think).

Swinging DOES alter your reality a bit.

Since I've started swinging now 8 years, I find myself regarding sex between 2 persons as nothing different from sharing a drink or a movie. I find myself associating with people who share similar views and sex is no longer "taboo" or exclusive. Certainly this is not normal for the majority non-swingers.

A lot of my vanilla social interactions are with men and women who at some point I've also slept with but 80% of the time when we meet it's just social banter, drinks and food not sex. Yet we are so open about sex that recently at a social gathering I was talking to a fella (about a movie if you must ask) and a girl interrupted us said "Sorry Gail" and grabbed him by the arm saying "Steven, I need a fuck come on" and off they went to the bedroom. I just laughed and shoo'd him away in her direction. The rest of us were (and remained) clothed and chit chatted most of the evening. Steven and J came out an hour later and continued the convo where they left off. No one blinked an eye. Of course we've all known each other for several years but for most people this won't be normal.

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By *eady and Willing 9Man
over a year ago

Wherever the party is @

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour?

Can you define normal and decent behaviour?

No such thing in this day and age lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Slightly dissenting view here (I think).

Swinging DOES alter your reality a bit.

I think you're agreeing with my point.

I probably worded it badly by saying warped.

Everyone has their own version of what's normal.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think my OP has been misunderstood.

Went off track a bit.

One track mind syndrome.

Sort of. More inability to differentiate between real life and fab."

You explain it better than I did. Thank you.

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By *azielMan
over a year ago

Midlands

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour? "

I think thats true for a select few. I can only comment on myself. Personally I enjoy sex alot but that's doesn't mean I want it every five minutes. However I do enjoy talking about it and the "chase" so to speak. But I know that I am speaking to a person, a stranger and therefore should become acquainted and chat a little bit first at least. We are all adults and therefore should know what is decent behaviour but i see alot of men especially constantly forcing or pressuring others into sex or play and it annoys me. Im then tainted with the same brush. However i believe most are decent and check there behaviour especially if it's pointed out that there actions are unacceptable. At the same time, this is a sex site. As always in life it's a simple matter of balance.

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By *heIcebreakersCouple
over a year ago

Cramlington

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour? "
24/7 is my idea of hell, both in the general sex sense and the BDSM sense.

This site doesn't breed anyone though - it may attract them, and they may feel legitimized by what they see here, but they come here fully formed, so to speak.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's a generalization to say people on these sites are, but there's certainly a fair share.

I'd say 80% of my time on here is interacting with the forums and that usually means avoiding crass topics.

I think a lot of us are drawn here out of curiosity and maybe sexdrive, but very few continuously sustain a constant level of heightened sexual arousal/activity. Personally I think it could dampen ones experience.

We're living in a world of quick fixes. I enjoy sex but it's not my focal point in life. I'd rather sit somewhere picturesque and enjoy the ambiance than relentlessly chase the next fix.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find when my gaggle of girlfriend's get together towards the end of the night the topic always turns blue.

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By *heIcebreakersCouple
over a year ago

Cramlington

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour?

Can you define normal and decent behaviour?

Normal and decent, for us, is safe, sane and consensual.

Other normalities are also available.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 26/10/17 08:23:01]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Even on Fab there is a degree of normality compared to some.

Non conformists have character which has what built this colourful world of ours.

If nobody stepped outside the box, pushed themselves, explored their boundaries, normal would be very bland.

We've found that since being on Fab we've become inured to lots of things that our friends find shocking.

Totally agree. This is morphing very similar into another thread in the Lounge.

I was mainly referring to normality in general. Even in my vanilla life I have pushed boundaries in non sexual areas.

Which thread?"

Headless pictures vs discreet censorship.

It went off on a tangent and Fabists have tried to normalise fab as a widely accepted social way of life.

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

"Do you think that people on sex/ swinging sites have a warped view of what is acceptable?

It seems like people get so used to talking about sex and looking at sexual pictures that they think everyone is the same and wants sex 24/7.

Does this environment breed certain types of people who forget what is normal and decent behaviour? "

Not in my vue. Yes i want sex 24/7 but I'm also a 30 year old virgin

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I find when my gaggle of girlfriend's get together towards the end of the night the topic always turns blue. "

Builders and tradesmen have a tendency to use sex as the subject for banter with each other. It's like a sport sometimes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This site doesn't breed anyone though - it may attract them, and they may feel legitimized by what they see here, but they come here fully formed, so to speak."

This is my view, I think people of questionable opinions/morals are the same as they were before they joined, if anything it feels more acceptable to share those with people on here which I think is a widespread issue with anonymity on the internet in general.

I don't think fab has changed my view of what's "normal", if anything it's opened my eyes to what people fetishize and made me a lot less shockable!

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