FabSwingers.com forum: Confused...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So there's a couples profile I have looked at few times, the wife was 100% my kind of woman and the profile stated they were looking for a guy for the woman's pleasure exclusively (I.e. No bi men thanks).

I send them a message after they've viewed my profile a few times sort of apologising and explaining why I've looked at them so much... the pics of the lady were fantastic.

I get no reply, however they view my profile a couple of times in the following 48hrs. So I send another message attempting to goad a reply saying that I've told them why I'm looking at them so why are you looking at my profile? - wink wink nudge nudge or words to that effect...

I was expecting a short reply at the very least, nope. Blocked.

Have I committed some kind of fab sin??!? I am slightly confused here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dude was probably wanking over your pictures. Doesn’t want the wife to know so blocked you

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Lol

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

What he said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They changed their mind. It's a bummer but that is how Fab is; fickle. It must be annoying/disappointing, but you just have to suck it up, think their loss and move on.

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

"So there's a couples profile I have looked at few times, the wife was 100% my kind of woman and the profile stated they were looking for a guy for the woman's pleasure exclusively (I.e. No bi men thanks).

I send them a message after they've viewed my profile a few times sort of apologising and explaining why I've looked at them so much... the pics of the lady were fantastic.

I was expecting a short reply at the very least, nope. Blocked.

Have I committed some kind of fab sin??!? I am slightly confused here

"
yes you dared to message them twice, no matter what they do.

to some they say they want something so they cant think about it, talk about it between themselves , see if anyone would, which is a turn on for them, but they dont go through with the fantasy, cos of fear...they didnt want to speak to you, that would cross the boundaries of fantasy into reality xx

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Viewing multiple times is one thing - but two messages in 48 hours without there having been a reply to the first just comes across as a little desperate and pushy to be honest - especially in the circumstances you describe.

You may have shot yourself in the foot with the follow up message too - perhaps they were viewing your profile while trying to decide whether to reply or not - then get the second message and that made the decision for them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We got a message from a guy. He was cute. I was interested. I replied with face pics and I wanted to chat more. Then I got a reminder message when I didn't reply in 24 hours. I explained that I don't always respond to messages when I sign in. The next message....got another reminder that he had messaged.

Now I'm no longer interested. I find it annoying....to be nudged constantly into giving undivided attention. It turns me off meets, if I'm honest. Maybe they felt the same?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My guess is you have paid so much attention to the female regardless of them saying they want a single fella for her and only that out of a couples profile i am guessing is not the case if it was she would have made a single female profile for just that and the fact you sent multiple messages when they never replied first time .. so they blocked you...only thing I can really think off . Female replying x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You've summed it up in one word there - fickle!

I've been on a few other sites that are similar to this over the years had I have ALWAYS sent a no thanks or not my type message when someone isn't interested.

If you need to take days to make a decision on if want to fuck someone or not the you need your head examined!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You've summed it up in one word there - fickle!

I've been on a few other sites that are similar to this over the years had I have ALWAYS sent a no thanks or not my type message when someone isn't interested.

If you need to take days to make a decision on if want to fuck someone or not the you need your head examined!!! "

Maybe they decided "no" instantly and were thinking of a polite way to let you down, then when you mailed again they decided it's just easier to block pushy men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You've summed it up in one word there - fickle!

I've been on a few other sites that are similar to this over the years had I have ALWAYS sent a no thanks or not my type message when someone isn't interested.

If you need to take days to make a decision on if want to fuck someone or not the you need your head examined!!! "

They weren't fickle...you thought you matched what they were looking for, they didn't. Then you messaged again after they'd deleted you-they didn't want any further communication from you we'd block you too...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You've summed it up in one word there - fickle!

I've been on a few other sites that are similar to this over the years had I have ALWAYS sent a no thanks or not my type message when someone isn't interested.

If you need to take days to make a decision on if want to fuck someone or not the you need your head examined!!! "

Not at all. We're interested in loads of people of Fab and simply don't have the time to meet them all. If someone we liked messaged us, we might have to think very carefully about whether we reply because we might not have time to meet them and we don't like to lead people on. So I don't think it's always realistic to expect people to make a decision quickly (we are available to play about once every 2 months, so it could well take us more than a day to make a decision if we don't want to waste people's time).

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You've summed it up in one word there - fickle!

I've been on a few other sites that are similar to this over the years had I have ALWAYS sent a no thanks or not my type message when someone isn't interested.

If you need to take days to make a decision on if want to fuck someone or not the you need your head examined!!!

Mrs"

I agree with that, plus we work different work patterns and can be total ships in the night. So we look at Fab at different times and it might be days before we get chance to actually chat about what we think about profiles who have been in touch. The chaser message would have irked me too, comes over as pushy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why are you confused OP.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why are you confused OP.

I am no longer... it appears that I am 'pushy' by sending a grand total of two messages.

Guess I need to hold back on the extremely upsetting practise of spamming someone's inbox with excessive contact

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sending another message after no reply from your first message was the problem. It's an unwritten rule that no reply means not interested. Some men just won't accept that though and that makes it hard for the rest of us

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By *aGaGagging for itCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

You've summed it up in one word there - goad!

They've appreciated what you were trying to do, found you too pushy and with them being inundated with messages from single guys couldn't be arsed to reply as they didn't want to open up an ongoing discussion about why they dont want to meet you.

Jusy because they are your ideal meet, it doesn't mean that you are theirs!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sending another message after no reply from your first message was the problem. It's an unwritten rule that no reply means not interested. Some men just won't accept that though and that makes it hard for the rest of us"

I think on this occasion the no reply did not necessarily mean not interested, as they continued to look at him. It could mean they were interested and were thinking about it, or waiting to discuss it with each other. However it's clear that there is a personality clash between the OP and the couple - the OP considers that people who take too long to decide if they want to fuck someone need their heads examined, and the couple clearly don't like being pushed to make a decision. So maybe not a good match.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just FYI it's not an unwritten rule, it's right there in the site FAQs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP I do think you would find Fab works better if you play the long game. A lot of couples and single ladies are not necessarily available to meet just because they have a profile on Fab. Many will have their regulars, so it's a big deal if they decide to meet someone new. On the rare occasion that we meet someone new we might have been watching them and thinking about it for some time before we make the first move. We often wait til we have time, so that we don't lead people on. Let people know you are interested, then leave it at that. Who knows they may come back to you in 6 months time.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The multiple views of your profile aspect of your question can easily be explained by both users logging onto the profile at different times and not exclusively together. They may have seen your profile on "who's viewed" and looked at it again. It doesn't mean they are interested, just forgetful, so it's quite plausible to rack up many views on a profile unwittingly.

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By *ampant Lion34Man
over a year ago

East Midlands

It's all just politics

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