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How many air fresheners are needed?

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By *olgate OP   Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

To get rid of the smell of a decomposing cadaver?

Asking for a friend obviously

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Just leave a window open to allow the flies in, it gets rid of the evidence er I mean cadaver much more quckly and allows some of the smell out in the meantime. I wonder if spraying the erm subject with this new fangled V. I. Poo would help.

Not that I've given this any consideration you understand...#walksawaywhistling

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd suggest asking a friend with a 4x4 to help hide, I mean relocate the cadaver to somewhere isolated where it won't be discovered, I mean the smell won't offend people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lighting a match and then blowing it out will get rid of any offending smells and replace them with a sulphar smell!

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By *al2001Man
over a year ago

kildare


"Lighting a match and then blowing it out will get rid of any offending smells and replace them with a sulphar smell! "

If you keep the match burning it will help burn off any smell as it burns oxygen

Or op could try flush it

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

burn candles as they will burn off the offending odour

also a good tip when cooking strong smelling foods

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By *hips n FursMan
over a year ago

Huddersfield

This is why everyone should have a pet pig.

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By *olgate OP   Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular


"This is why everyone should have a pet pig."

Where can I Er one get a pet pig?

Obviously still asking for a friend

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury


"This is why everyone should have a pet pig.

Where can I Er one get a pet pig?

Obviously still asking for a friend "

Farmers market

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By *horltzMan
over a year ago

heysham

Chop an onion in half and leave half in the corner of the room , worked for me .... Ahem , I mean a friend

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Bicarbonate of soda in a lemon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To get rid of the smell of a decomposing cadaver?

Asking for a friend obviously "

Just two, one up each nostril or a dab of Vic on your top lip will do the trick as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

42.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ps, happy birthday, Colgate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

After a disaster trying to pop corn on the cob yesterday and nearly setting fire to the microwave I think the burnt smell that's still lingering would mask pretty much anything!

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen


"Just leave a window open to allow the flies in, it gets rid of the evidence er I mean cadaver much more quckly and allows some of the smell out in the meantime. I wonder if spraying the erm subject with this new fangled V. I. Poo would help.

Not that I've given this any consideration you understand...#walksawaywhistling"

This tickled me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Use cloves in an orange and lavender ... or onions and fish... that will keep anyone away

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By *ungBlackTopMan
over a year ago

salford

Why does your friend have a cadaver in their home in the first place? Someone needs to call the Police I think.

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By *ohnaronMan
over a year ago

london

A friend tells me forget the patio. I, I mean he, said you will never get the slabs level again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you do bury the offensive item under the patio. make sure it is well wrapped in heavy duty plastic and buried at least 3 feet below the surface.

My patio sorry i mean my friends patio still whiffs on a warm day

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"If you do bury the offensive item under the patio. make sure it is well wrapped in heavy duty plastic and buried at least 3 feet below the surface.

My patio sorry i mean my friends patio still whiffs on a warm day"

Hope it's not near any water pipes under your friends patio?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha, you'll need to buy the entire shelf

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By *eanut Butter CupWoman
over a year ago

B & M Bargains

Seriously, a guy who lived near me died in his house. The neighbours reported it as they must have smelt something and the police said "he had been dead for a while"

The windows in the house have been open since then, about 3 months now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

2, one for each nostril

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"Seriously, a guy who lived near me died in his house. The neighbours reported it as they must have smelt something and the police said "he had been dead for a while"

The windows in the house have been open since then, about 3 months now "

Do you mind I'm trying to consume a sandwich here lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Body in a tarpaulin, cover with lime....just be careful not not get lime on your skin, lime helps with decomposition and it will hinder identification. Wrap up, seal with duct tape (other brands are available) seal then either throw it out of the window, caeful of prints or DNA contamination, you may want to wear a haz mat and nitrile gloves through the procedure. Or you can lump it into the car, and throw it off a bridge. I'm a lazy person so I just hire other people to do my killings. Expensive but efficient.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seriously, a guy who lived near me died in his house. The neighbours reported it as they must have smelt something and the police said "he had been dead for a while"

The windows in the house have been open since then, about 3 months now

Do you mind I'm trying to consume a sandwich here lol. "
Wrong thread to be in while you're eating sandwiches, hehe x

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By *hechapMan
over a year ago

Derry

The smell must be deadly.

I don't know how anyone could live in the house.

It would just kill me.

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By *hips n FursMan
over a year ago

Huddersfield

Don't worry about getting a pet pig,I'll just send my assistant Egor around to collect.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Don't worry about getting a pet pig,I'll just send my assistant Egor around to collect."

Ha ha

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"Body in a tarpaulin, cover with lime....just be careful not not get lime on your skin, lime helps with decomposition and it will hinder identification. Wrap up, seal with duct tape (other brands are available) seal then either throw it out of the window, caeful of prints or DNA contamination, you may want to wear a haz mat and nitrile gloves through the procedure. Or you can lump it into the car, and throw it off a bridge. I'm a lazy person so I just hire other people to do my killings. Expensive but efficient."

Can you please pass on those contact details as I need to recruit an assasin....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Body in a tarpaulin, cover with lime....just be careful not not get lime on your skin, lime helps with decomposition and it will hinder identification. Wrap up, seal with duct tape (other brands are available) seal then either throw it out of the window, caeful of prints or DNA contamination, you may want to wear a haz mat and nitrile gloves through the procedure. Or you can lump it into the car, and throw it off a bridge. I'm a lazy person so I just hire other people to do my killings. Expensive but efficient.

Can you please pass on those contact details as I need to recruit an assasin.... "
Who do you want taking out?

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By *olgate OP   Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular


"Body in a tarpaulin, cover with lime....just be careful not not get lime on your skin, lime helps with decomposition and it will hinder identification. Wrap up, seal with duct tape (other brands are available) seal then either throw it out of the window, caeful of prints or DNA contamination, you may want to wear a haz mat and nitrile gloves through the procedure. Or you can lump it into the car, and throw it off a bridge. I'm a lazy person so I just hire other people to do my killings. Expensive but efficient.

Can you please pass on those contact details as I need to recruit an assasin.... Who do you want taking out? "

Taken out?

I can't even get a social at the moment

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By *eanut Butter CupWoman
over a year ago

B & M Bargains


"Seriously, a guy who lived near me died in his house. The neighbours reported it as they must have smelt something and the police said "he had been dead for a while"

The windows in the house have been open since then, about 3 months now

Do you mind I'm trying to consume a sandwich here lol. Wrong thread to be in while you're eating sandwiches, hehe x "

Definitely! Imagine living next door to him and trying to eat that sandwich

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I'm rather against air fresheners - especially those electronic ones. Though if a friend bought a cadaver around I'd need a solution to it.

Fresh air and flowers work for me -alive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yankee are actually doing a sale at the moment,

I'd go for the Black Cherry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on the size of the room.

5 after 3 days, 12 after 4, and 20 after 5.

Try a freezer instead and don't ask how I know.

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By *olgate OP   Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular


"Depends on the size of the room.

5 after 3 days, 12 after 4, and 20 after 5.

Try a freezer instead and don't ask how I know."

Will I need to take the drawers out on an upright, how should I label the bags?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try an onion.

There's no wrong answers here, remember that.

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By *olgate OP   Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular


"Try an onion.

There's no wrong answers here, remember that. "

Pickled, red or spring?

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By *horltzMan
over a year ago

heysham


"Body in a tarpaulin, cover with lime....just be careful not not get lime on your skin, lime helps with decomposition and it will hinder identification. Wrap up, seal with duct tape (other brands are available) seal then either throw it out of the window, caeful of prints or DNA contamination, you may want to wear a haz mat and nitrile gloves through the procedure. Or you can lump it into the car, and throw it off a bridge. I'm a lazy person so I just hire other people to do my killings. Expensive but efficient."

All well and good but don't forget to remove teeth or the skeleton will be identifiable

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By *ohnaronMan
over a year ago

london

Oh ffs just put it in a wheelie bid outside a morturary. They will blame the work experience kid and get shot of it pdq.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Body in a tarpaulin, cover with lime....just be careful not not get lime on your skin, lime helps with decomposition and it will hinder identification. Wrap up, seal with duct tape (other brands are available) seal then either throw it out of the window, caeful of prints or DNA contamination, you may want to wear a haz mat and nitrile gloves through the procedure. Or you can lump it into the car, and throw it off a bridge. I'm a lazy person so I just hire other people to do my killings. Expensive but efficient.

All well and good but don't forget to remove teeth or the skeleton will be identifiable "

Oh goodness yes. How did I miss that. Can't we just set it on fire?

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

Tell your friend to take the cadaver out to sea...tip it over the edge of the boat. Sorted.

And a nice day out, too...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell your friend to take the cadaver out to sea...tip it over the edge of the boat. Sorted.

And a nice day out, too... "

Ooh as well as feeding the fish! It's all win win x

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By *octor DeleriumMan
over a year ago

Wellingborough


"To get rid of the smell of a decomposing cadaver?"

Once the juices of putrefaction have managed to get into absorbent material; wood, carpet, bedding etc., you are not going to shift them, and you'll need more than air fresheners to mask the odour.

The culprits are, primarily, putrescine and cadaverine which have a very low odour threshold.

Other odoriferous products of decomposition include indole, skatole and various hydrogen sulphur compounds.

Decomposition produces nearly five hundred organic and inorganic breakdown products; all this from the enzymatic breakdown of your own flesh by enzymes!

The first compounds are produced within a few minutes of death and these are responsible for the attraction of insects such as blow flies (Calliphora vicina, C vomitoria, and C cadaverina).

Trust me on the permeation and longevity; I know of one very expensive Ferrari, in which the owner, killed himself; it ended up being scrapped as it proved impossible to get the stink out.

Dr Nasty

Bristol PounddSaverLand Mortuary

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

I'd use a woodchipper myself, then scatter the pieces at sea.

Totaly avoids the rotting corpse smell

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By *olgate OP   Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular


"Oh ffs just put it in a wheelie bid outside a morturary. They will blame the work experience kid and get shot of it pdq."

Anyone have a spare wheelybin?

My friend wants to know

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