FabSwingers.com forum: Insults or insulting phrases

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've found out some rather unsavoury news about a now ex playmate. Am not getting into a fight with him about it and have just blocked, deleted all photos/contact details etc and am walking away.

Please post below with your favourite insults or insulting phrases to cheer me up

I'm not going to speak to him but if I did and could really let loose, what put down could you recommend?!

Do your worst!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'I wouldn't give him the steam off my piss'

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By *elson61Man
over a year ago

WELWYN GARDEN CITY

This man has delusions of adequacy.

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By *elson61Man
over a year ago

WELWYN GARDEN CITY

"I'm jealous of all the people who have never met you"

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By *ub-seekerMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

I'm glad you came. Just a shame your dad did

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If beauty's skin deep, you must be inside out!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This is cheering me up already!

Despite my mahoooosive hangover!

Keep em coming Xx

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By *elson61Man
over a year ago

WELWYN GARDEN CITY

"The best part of you dribbled down your mums leg"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You make Joey Essex look bright

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You should stop letting your mother cut your hair.

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By *elson61Man
over a year ago

WELWYN GARDEN CITY

"With your personality you will never need birth control"

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

When I asked for a thick 8 inches, I didn't expect you to be 8 inches tall and thick as shit

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By *elson61Man
over a year ago

WELWYN GARDEN CITY

"If shit was music you would be an orchestra"

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

I hope you step on Lego...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

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By *aul1973HullMan
over a year ago

East Hull

A jobby flavoured fart lozenge!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A jobby flavoured fart lozenge!"

There's one I hadn't heard before

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your as thick as white and a cunt with a capital k

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did your parents go on to have normal kid's

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

May the flies of a thousand camels crawl up your ass and invade your innards ya bastid !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

your mouth tasted like smeg

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

May your balls turn to bicycle pedals and back pedal up your are !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your father was a hamster...and yr mother stank of elderberries!!!...gotta be a python fan to appreciate that 1!lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're a crossfitter!

Oh lord and saviour almighty forgive me for I have said such a foul word!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm cracking up

My inner childish self loves this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 27/08/17 14:48:46]

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

Tory!!!

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By *aul1973HullMan
over a year ago

East Hull

You're just like your mother!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive just come accross this post which scrolling

love these insults!!

Op. Would it be ok if i pm'd you a question about your original post? Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Did your parents go on to have normal kid's

Ooh I like this one!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Looks like 10lbs of shit in a 5lb bag.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""With your personality you will never need birth control""
lol

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By *hechapMan
over a year ago

Derry

Your mother never needed to pretend she had a migrane after you were born.

You were the cause of many a real headache.

I bet your da wished he had just pulled his wire that evening and acted to be in a real deep sleep.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tory!!!

Love it!

My favourite one was something i read in the paper where some kids described someone as "looking a bit ukip" -

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My favourite one is

Hope your next shit is a hedgehog.

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By *elson61Man
over a year ago

WELWYN GARDEN CITY

"I thought of you while I was shopping in the supermarket when I looked at a loaf of bread. Then I looked a bit closer and realised it said "thick cut"

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By *J RHEAMan
over a year ago

S West

You take life advice from the magic 8 ball

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/08/17 00:43:56]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your only chance of getting laid, is to crawl up a chicken's arse and wait....

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"Your only chance of getting laid, is to crawl up a chicken's arse and wait...."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Son of a rabid she camel's syphilitic cunt.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cancerous sore on the answer of humanity.

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By *rightonCheekyMan
over a year ago

Brighton

If brains were dynamite you wouldn't have enough to blow your nose ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Build a boat, cry me a river and sail the Fuck away!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We may have to steal a few of these lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the midwife threw the baby away and gave your mother the afterbirth.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

Come back when you've got less time

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I do love you lot, you know!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your as bright as as solar eclipse!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a cock face cake hole only good for stuffing!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"you're depriving a Village, of an idiot"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You brighten the room whenever you leave it.

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By *rjimMan
over a year ago

nr bristol

When you were born, the police arrested your dad, the doctor slapped your mom, animal control euthanized your brother, and A&E made a documentary that saved your life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'you always have the best spot in the room, because you don't have to look at yourself'!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How the fuck did you crawl out of that abortion bucket?

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

These are so good, it's bad!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cock chomping, monky spanking, hairy arse licking spunk stain

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By *rouble1110Woman
over a year ago

Cleveland

Your nothing but dirt under my feet

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By *ew sensationMan
over a year ago

widnes

Been banged more times then a shithouse door in a high wind . . .lmfao

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By *rchie300Man
over a year ago

Hamworthy

When god gave out looks .... you thought he said books ... and asked for a horror

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By *omerset tvTV/TS
over a year ago

Weston-super-Mare

I bet your mum wished she had swallowed now lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is that your face or has your neck thrown up

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By *essandpatCouple
over a year ago

chester

Your balls are like punching bags x

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

I wouldn't piss on you, if you were the last man on the planet & on fire

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A face like a bucketful of spanners.

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By *utterflyandArtificeCouple
over a year ago

Trowbridge

Cockwombling thundercunt........strangely all were on my predictive text

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The only reason your parents stayed together, was because neither of them wanted custody of you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hahahahaha omg some of these are brilliant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was your dad a weightlifter ......

He must have been to raise a dumbbell like you....

Sausage Jockey.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I borrow your face for a few days... My ass is going on holiday

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I prefer to keep things short and sweet. "Fuckwit" and "oik" are two of my favourites

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're so thick when god was handing out Brains you must have thought he said Trains and asked for a slow one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You're so thick when god was handing out Brains you must have thought he said Trains and asked for a slow one "

LOL X

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By *rightonCheekyMan
over a year ago

Brighton

Is your arse jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth?

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By *irenGuy70Man
over a year ago

Cirencester

You fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down!

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By *rightonCheekyMan
over a year ago

Brighton

If my dog had a face like yours I would shave his ass and walk him backwards.

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By *J RHEAMan
over a year ago

S West

Berk, cretin, twit and ghoul are some of my favourites, along with feckless idiot, imbecile too, dunce

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Two wrongs don't make a right.....your parents a a perfect example.

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"you're depriving a Village, of an idiot"

Yes... London

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

Well your mother never actually went to a sperm bank she was a bareback gangbang slut, though just like a sperm bank she doesn't know who your daddy is

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By *owboy BebopMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Bus Stop Cock Sucker !

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By *hechapMan
over a year ago

Derry

You must have been born at a time when milk was plentiful and the water scacre.

If i had been the midwife i would have drowned you in the bath before your 1st feed.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is your arse jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth?"

This is actually so perfect for the circumstances

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Wankstain

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

When they made you they threw away the mould... Thank God

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By *rightonCheekyMan
over a year ago

Brighton

"Is your arse jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth?

This is actually so perfect for the circumstances

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You look like a bulldog licking piss off a stinging nettle

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By *ickD38Man
over a year ago

Preston

"If brains were shite you wouldn't even stink."

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By *ickD38Man
over a year ago

Preston

"There's so much horseshit comes out of your mouth you'd think your arse ate oats"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You look like a bulldog licking piss off a stinging nettle"

Nearly spat my weetabix accross the kitchen reading that one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You hit every branch of the ugly tree you fell out of

Fuzz

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You've got a face like a bag of rusty spanners only your blind mother could love

Fuzz

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By *rightonCheekyMan
over a year ago

Brighton

I may be d*unk but in the morning I will be sober but you will still be ugly .....

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By *nsatiantCouple
over a year ago

stowmarket

If you had a beard and smoked a cigar you would look like a film star...... Lassie having a shit!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is your arse jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth?

This is actually so perfect for the circumstances

Sums it up perfecrly!!! I *almost* want to unblock long enough to send it then reblock!

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"I may be d*unk but in the morning I will be sober but you will still be ugly ....."

Churchill, I believe..

He was a master of insults

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Words can't describe how beautiful you are. But thankfully numbers can you're a 1 out 10

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I borrow your brain I'm building an idiot!!!!!

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By *anillaguyMan
over a year ago

Kingston

Fuck off and lick the sweat from a dead man's balls

Hope all is well with you OP and hope to see you again soon. Maybe hellfire again? X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I use these ones alot.

"You're kind of like Rapunzel. Except, instead of letting down your hair you just let everyone down in your life"

"Better versions of you ran down your mother's leg"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shit eating aids rat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If brains were dynamite you wouldnt have enought to blow your nose

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yo daddy should of done what the yanks did in Vietnam .....

Pulled out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you a cheese maker... because you've got a face that can curdle milk

Fuzz

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your a leech growing fat on others misfortune

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But I don't do mean... always classy... no thank you now kindly fook off ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberry

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By *inkySeeKinkyDoWoman
over a year ago

'tween PontyCarlo & CasVegas in West Yorks

Loving these lol

I've met some pricks in my time, but you sir are a cactus

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tosspot

- Mrs. J -

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are you a cheese maker... because you've got a face that can curdle milk

Fuzz"

Yeah he has!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best part of you ran down the crack of your mothers arse....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Are you a cheese maker... because you've got a face that can curdle milk

Fuzz

Yeah he has!!"

To put some context to this reply - nerd-girl seeing my original post prompted us to discover that the fella I posted about had been stringing not just us two, but at least one other, along! So he is now very much binned thanks to the power of the fab forum!

The forum has saved us both a heck of a lot of time, emotional investment, and money that we spent on this idiot!

And yes, his face is a tough one to cope with - I particularly liked the bulldog licking a stinging nettle comment above

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are you a cheese maker... because you've got a face that can curdle milk

Fuzz

Yeah he has!!

The forum has saved us both a heck of a lot of time, emotional investment, and money that we spent on this idiot!

And yes, his face is a tough one to cope with - I particularly liked the bulldog licking a stinging nettle comment above

And new girlfriends made!!

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By *ub-MasterMan
over a year ago

South Yorkshire

I once got into a little contretemps with my, not quite, ex-wife and the guy who is now her husband, a conversation her beau was stoking.

I just said to him "You'll remember this for the rest of your life with ****" He looked at me with his vacant eyes and said "Wha?"

"Every time you kiss her, just remember, my knob's been in there!"

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By *essandpatCouple
over a year ago

chester

Every time you enter a room every one else leaves x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are you a cheese maker... because you've got a face that can curdle milk

Fuzz

Yeah he has!!

The forum has saved us both a heck of a lot of time, emotional investment, and money that we spent on this idiot!

And yes, his face is a tough one to cope with - I particularly liked the bulldog licking a stinging nettle comment above

That insult goes, 'a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp whilst pissing on nettles', down our way

Fuzz

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My personal favorite come from Ukraine. "I hope a duck kicks you", or maybe France with, "your mother was born is a trolly".

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By *eeky goodnessMan
over a year ago

Worcester

I can feel my brain cells dying every second I talk to you

And don't speak you lower the whole IQ of the entire room

Or you are just an oxygen thief

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go eat a cactus

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone pass a dictionary, because I don't understand a single word you said!

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By *eliz NelsonMan
over a year ago

The Tantric Tea Shop

That statement was half witty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You give my arse toothache

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"I've found out some rather unsavoury news about a now ex playmate. Am not getting into a fight with him about it and have just blocked, deleted all photos/contact details etc and am walking away.

Please post below with your favourite insults or insulting phrases to cheer me up

I'm not going to speak to him but if I did and could really let loose, what put down could you recommend?!

Do your worst!

"
was it me?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have heels higher than your standards

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

You have the IQ of a daffodil and you give me a pain in my shit

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

You're really quite unfortunate looking

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By *eliz NelsonMan
over a year ago

The Tantric Tea Shop

Yes! You are attractive.....but unfortunately to flies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It sounds like you're chewing a brick when you speak

Fuzz

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By *is vixen at playCouple
over a year ago

Dundee

You were a waste of your dad's spunk you should of gone where the rest of it went...... down your mother's throat.

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By *eeky goodnessMan
over a year ago

Worcester

Your family tree is a cactus, because everybody on it is a prick.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've meet some real pricks in my time, but you are a fucking cactus ??

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By *ub-MasterMan
over a year ago

South Yorkshire

The best bit of you ran down your Mother's leg

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When God give you teeth....he ruined a good arsehole

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By *erdyCoupleCouple
over a year ago

telford

I'd call you a c*nt, but then I'd be calling you useful.

Apologies if I've offended anyone with the certain word.

I know everyone hates the word useful!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I didn't beleive in abortion until I met you

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Insults or insulting phrases - do your worst!!