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nasty comments and judgementals

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Can we please not have the nasty, snide, bullying or judgemental holier than though comments on the forums please. There are new people coming in all the time and would like to welcome them in not scare them away.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *hagginhaggisCouple
over a year ago

aberdeen

well said!

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

yeah - lull them into thinking this is a nice place then hit them once they have settled in

only joking lol i do think some ofus regulars forget that there are new posters about, its one of the reasons i try not to let repea threads get on my nerves

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I think there has been too much lately and it needs reigning in a bit please.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I personally think it goes too far at times... but I also think the sweeping statements made in these forums also contributes... e g the site is full of time wasters, single guys are all the same etc etc..

and on occasion made by people who either take this all too seriously, themselves too seriously, have started to believe their own hype..... or just plain needy.

however, it does go too far at times.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

been saying it for ages, hell...Ive been promoting the forums to those bored of chat...imagine my embarrassment when they get here and realise theres fuds here too! hehehe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As much as I agree with you, it's not gonna stop. It's not matter of being rude or judgemental, it's more to do with some people being very arrogant.

Confidence is good but there is a very fine line...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tis schadenfreude...like a boy entertaining his "shadow"..picking the wings of a fly, and getting excited...and keyboard warriors...all puff and ego...

There tis...it won`t change..some people don`t grow up..take what yer want, and leave the rest

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"Tis schadenfreude...like a boy entertaining his "shadow"..picking the wings of a fly, and getting excited...and keyboard warriors...all puff and ego...

There tis...it won`t change..some people don`t grow up..take what yer want, and leave the rest "
So is that why you pull my pigtails?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tis schadenfreude...like a boy entertaining his "shadow"..picking the wings of a fly, and getting excited...and keyboard warriors...all puff and ego...

There tis...it won`t change..some people don`t grow up..take what yer want, and leave the rest So is that why you pull my pigtails?"

You`re stood on my feet !

Nice hold

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"Can we please not have the nasty, snide, bullying or judgemental holier than though comments on the forums please. There are new people coming in all the time and would like to welcome them in not scare them away."

sometimes it is a 2 way street and some people don't really "help themselves" so to speak... for example... I am a great believer in first impressions... so if post no.1 on here is a whinge or a moan then you then to replicate what you see...

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"Can we please not have the nasty, snide, bullying or judgemental holier than though comments on the forums please. There are new people coming in all the time and would like to welcome them in not scare them away.

sometimes it is a 2 way street and some people don't really "help themselves" so to speak... for example... I am a great believer in first impressions... so if post no.1 on here is a whinge or a moan then you then to replicate what you see..."
I aghree Fabio but i always think that its the 1st reply that sets the mood to a thread like that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can we please not have the nasty, snide, bullying or judgemental holier than though comments on the forums please. There are new people coming in all the time and would like to welcome them in not scare them away."

+1

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By *gowcplCouple
over a year ago

glasgow

to be honest i dont think it will get any better anytime soon. far too many people on this site full of their own importance. the ones i cant understand are when someone opens a new thread in forums, for example asking if anyone fancies a drink on the saturday night with a _iew to possibly more happening, and you get members replying "no we dont" !?! what the f**k is that all about ? surely if a forum post doesnt interest you it can easily be ignored ? why go in with all the negativity ?

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"Can we please not have the nasty, snide, bullying or judgemental holier than though comments on the forums please. There are new people coming in all the time and would like to welcome them in not scare them away.

sometimes it is a 2 way street and some people don't really "help themselves" so to speak... for example... I am a great believer in first impressions... so if post no.1 on here is a whinge or a moan then you then to replicate what you see..."

So what if they are having a bad day, get pissed off with something on here, post it, but then they go back to their normal self and start joining in on the forums?

Sometimes a second chance is better than holding a grudge for one post.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can we please not have the nasty, snide, bullying or judgemental holier than though comments on the forums please. There are new people coming in all the time and would like to welcome them in not scare them away.

sometimes it is a 2 way street and some people don't really "help themselves" so to speak... for example... I am a great believer in first impressions... so if post no.1 on here is a whinge or a moan then you then to replicate what you see...

So what if they are having a bad day, get pissed off with something on here, post it, but then they go back to their normal self and start joining in on the forums?

Sometimes a second chance is better than holding a grudge for one post."

excellent point, we tend to forget that peeps sometimes have difficult things going on in their lives. Sometimes they just won't realise they are being bad tempered.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"Can we please not have the nasty, snide, bullying or judgemental holier than though comments on the forums please. There are new people coming in all the time and would like to welcome them in not scare them away."

also the judgements go both ways as well... how many times have we seen people make sweeping generalisations with regards to people who swing, or timewasters, or to not getting replies ect ect ect....

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

To be honest though, although I think Shaz had good intentions with her thread, but these types of posts normally make things worse, as people end up having sly digs at other members , those members recognise themselves and comment, and all hell breaks loose......so the OP defeats the object.

Best thing to do is...if you see someone getting a tough time on the forums, say so, peer pressure is better than any mod system.

If it carries on, let a mod know or REPORT it from the post itself and Admin or a mod can check it out.

Above all, let's have some respect for other members and their posts.

Thanks

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"Can we please not have the nasty, snide, bullying or judgemental holier than though comments on the forums please. There are new people coming in all the time and would like to welcome them in not scare them away.

sometimes it is a 2 way street and some people don't really "help themselves" so to speak... for example... I am a great believer in first impressions... so if post no.1 on here is a whinge or a moan then you then to replicate what you see...

So what if they are having a bad day, get pissed off with something on here, post it, but then they go back to their normal self and start joining in on the forums?

Sometimes a second chance is better than holding a grudge for one post."

but the problem is how do we know at that point they are having as you say "a bad day"... we only have as any evidence what is written.

sometimes you can't do right for doing wrong....

write down a frank reply you get accused of being unfriendly..

point them in the direction of a thread where a question may have been answered and you get accused of being impersonal...

answer it in a jokey fashion.. and the clique word gets thrown around....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think there has been too much lately and it needs reigning in a bit please."

are you being judgemental now

apart from the obviously contentious postings, its easy to forget the sometimes the text that is written does not match completely the message that is meant by the poster.

when talking to someone face to face, you have body language, intonation, expression to help convey meaning.... with flat text (often unpunctuated) these subtle cues can easily be lost.

as a relatively new poster it's interesting to see how quickly people can become enflamed... but (focussing on the positive) there are some posters on here who regularly have me in fits of laughter..... (and i wont even mention my secret crush for Granny Crumpet!!)

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