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"It's probably because you've got a foof. And an okish arse. "haha this | |||
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"It's probably because you've got a foof. And an okish arse. "So you think I should remove them? | |||
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"Hide your photos. " This is probably the way to go.
OP, you have great pictures and you're attractive. It doesn't matter what your profile says. | |||
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"Just use your filters to prevent any undesirables,which by the sounds of it is everybody, from contacting you. Simple really. " I can't use my filters. They're set so that Mr right can still contact me if he ever stumbles across my profile. | |||
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"I changed my profile text in order to put off as many people as possible, yet I'm still getting messages! The ones that amuse me the most start "I know you won't even read this. .." so why bother? What's a girl have to do to make it stop?! Help please. I'm at my wits end. Disclaimer: no actual words from actual messages have been used in the remaking of the above sentence. All similarities to real life situations and people are purely coincidental. Serious suggestions only please. And please stick to the subject. You are not allowed to say anything that I disagree with. Any suggestions made will be disregarded and I'll come up with reasons why I can't. "Oh the pressures of being a sexy single lady in the world of fab! You have our sympathies xx | |||
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I'd say change your profile gender to male, but I still get messages from hopeful (thirsty?) guys so...  | |||
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"Hide your photos. " My Dr said I have to publicly display my arse. And boobs. And foof. | |||
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"It's probably because you've got a foof. And an okish arse. haha this "Because it sounds like you are settling them a challenge! | |||
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"I changed my profile text in order to put off as many people as possible, yet I'm still getting messages! The ones that amuse me the most start "I know you won't even read this. .." so why bother? What's a girl have to do to make it stop?! Help please. I'm at my wits end. Disclaimer: no actual words from actual messages have been used in the remaking of the above sentence. All similarities to real life situations and people are purely coincidental. Serious suggestions only please. And please stick to the subject. You are not allowed to say anything that I disagree with. Any suggestions made will be disregarded and I'll come up with reasons why I can't.
Oh the pressures of being a sexy single lady in the world of fab! You have our sympathies xx "We honestly feel that there would be no pressure or friction if everyone on here showed the good manners to read and respect profiles. | |||
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"It's probably because you've got a foof. And an okish arse.
So you think I should remove them? "How will you sit down?  | |||
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"Just read your profile... And spat my tea out laughing. Thank God it's not lunch time or it would have been gin! " Sorry for your loss of tea. I'm glad it wasn't gin. I would have felt too guilty. | |||
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"It's probably because you've got a foof. And an okish arse.
So you think I should remove them? "No, 'cause what will I perv on occasionally? I'm in two minds - hiding them will stop messages but you might miss out on someone great. | |||
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"I changed my profile text in order to put off as many people as possible, yet I'm still getting messages! The ones that amuse me the most start "I know you won't even read this. .." so why bother? What's a girl have to do to make it stop?! Help please. I'm at my wits end. Disclaimer: no actual words from actual messages have been used in the remaking of the above sentence. All similarities to real life situations and people are purely coincidental. Serious suggestions only please. And please stick to the subject. You are not allowed to say anything that I disagree with. Any suggestions made will be disregarded and I'll come up with reasons why I can't. "Hide your tits! They are like a magnet! | |||
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"Get an electric zapper on your inbox, that'll see them off " Where do I get one please? Do I need an electrician to wire it in? | |||
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"Just read your profile... And spat my tea out laughing. Thank God it's not lunch time or it would have been gin! Sorry for your loss of tea. I'm glad it wasn't gin. I would have felt too guilty. "It would have been a tragedy right!? | |||
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"It's a beautiful profile. Just tell them all to feck off" I'm no good at swears. Will you do it for me please?  | |||
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"It's probably because you've got a foof. And an okish arse.
So you think I should remove them? "Surgery is the way forward. Dibs on having your boobies once yours have been removed | |||
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"It's a beautiful profile. Just tell them all to feck off I'm no good at swears. Will you do it for me please? "I'll do anything for you when you flutter your lashes | |||
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"Hide your photos. My Dr said I have to publicly display my arse. And boobs. And foof. " well that's a nice change from a prescription for antibiotics  | |||
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"Get an electric zapper on your inbox, that'll see them off Where do I get one please? Do I need an electrician to wire it in? " You do, however; you need to sift through the ones who pretend to be a sparky just to get their dinky dunked. It's like running the gauntlet I tell thee | |||
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"Get an electric zapper on your inbox, that'll see them off " Good idea to wire up the outbox as well, just in case any men try the "ooops, wrong box" excuse | |||
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"Hide your photos. My Dr said I have to publicly display my arse. And boobs. And foof. well that's a nice change from a prescription for antibiotics "I can't understand why he's currently facing sexual harassment charges. .. | |||
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"It's a beautiful profile. Just tell them all to feck off I'm no good at swears. Will you do it for me please?
I'll do anything for you when you flutter your lashes "I've just made that note on your profile  | |||
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"I changed my profile text in order to put off as many people as possible, yet I'm still getting messages! The ones that amuse me the most start "I know you won't even read this. .." so why bother? What's a girl have to do to make it stop?! Help please. I'm at my wits end. Disclaimer: no actual words from actual messages have been used in the remaking of the above sentence. All similarities to real life situations and people are purely coincidental. Serious suggestions only please. And please stick to the subject. You are not allowed to say anything that I disagree with. Any suggestions made will be disregarded and I'll come up with reasons why I can't. "Hi, I sent you a message as your profile was so interesting and I liked the fact that you seem to be good fun and don't take yourself seriously (as well as being one sexy lady!). I see that you've read but haven't deleted my message, so hopefully no serious faux pas from me! 
Nick | |||
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Unfortunately unless the bisexual fairy gets into your consciousness we wouldn't waste your time by messaging you.
Oh.... almost forgot, happy swinging | |||
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"It's a beautiful profile. Just tell them all to feck off I'm no good at swears. Will you do it for me please?
I'll do anything for you when you flutter your lashes
I've just made that note on your profile "Oh | |||
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"It's exactly the kind of portfolio we find irresistible and those shoes
Unfortunately unless the bisexual fairy gets into your consciousness we wouldn't waste your time by messaging you.
Oh.... almost forgot, happy swinging "How do you like my new profile text? I think it's spot on. I must be honest, I've been getting less messages about my vag and more about the dentist. | |||
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"Just use your filters to prevent any undesirables,which by the sounds of it is everybody, from contacting you. Simple really. I can't use my filters. They're set so that Mr right can still contact me if he ever stumbles across my profile. " Well in that case you're fucked. Try a very off putting headline, something like "I'm here solely to live out my fantasy of biting a cock clean off" that ought to slow down your in box x | |||
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"I changed my profile text in order to put off as many people as possible, yet I'm still getting messages! The ones that amuse me the most start "I know you won't even read this. .." so why bother? What's a girl have to do to make it stop?! Help please. I'm at my wits end. Disclaimer: no actual words from actual messages have been used in the remaking of the above sentence. All similarities to real life situations and people are purely coincidental. Serious suggestions only please. And please stick to the subject. You are not allowed to say anything that I disagree with. Any suggestions made will be disregarded and I'll come up with reasons why I can't.
Hi,
I sent you a message as your profile was so interesting and I liked the fact that you seem to be good fun and don't take yourself seriously (as well as being one sexy lady!). I see that you've read but haven't deleted my message, so hopefully no serious faux pas from me!
Nick "Ah thank you for your message. ..you obviously didn't pick up on my laziness | |||
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"It's exactly the kind of portfolio we find irresistible and those shoes
Unfortunately unless the bisexual fairy gets into your consciousness we wouldn't waste your time by messaging you.
Oh.... almost forgot, happy swinging
How do you like my new profile text? I think it's spot on. I must be honest, I've been getting less messages about my vag and more about the dentist. "I'd put you down as quirky... The texts a Bit to long for my concentration levels, we'd still take a punt on you cause we only want to use you for your body which looks to be in good order and we're totally desperate | |||
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"Howsabout deliberately making your profile sound like a fella pretending to be a lady?(Admittedly, this will not put off those fab-straight gentleman that are as persistent in their pursuit of men as much as the ladies). Or maybe state that you will only ever reply to the gentleman that has fought off the other wannabe suitors in a duel to the death in the Fabberdome! (Kinda like Thunderdome, but with Shibari harnesses instead of bunjees, and ginormous oversized sex toys instead of standard weapons scattered around... Or I could possibly just be letting my sleep deprivation and excess caffeine affect my slightly overworked brain this morning... in which case, apologies and please ignore the above... "You've been giving that some thought | |||
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"Howsabout deliberately making your profile sound like a fella pretending to be a lady?(Admittedly, this will not put off those fab-straight gentleman that are as persistent in their pursuit of men as much as the ladies). Or maybe state that you will only ever reply to the gentleman that has fought off the other wannabe suitors in a duel to the death in the Fabberdome! (Kinda like Thunderdome, but with Shibari harnesses instead of bunjees, and ginormous oversized sex toys instead of standard weapons scattered around... Or I could possibly just be letting my sleep deprivation and excess caffeine affect my slightly overworked brain this morning... in which case, apologies and please ignore the above...
You've been giving that some thought "I think someone forgot this was the lounge and not the fantasy section | |||
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"Howsabout deliberately making your profile sound like a fella pretending to be a lady?(Admittedly, this will not put off those fab-straight gentleman that are as persistent in their pursuit of men as much as the ladies). Or maybe state that you will only ever reply to the gentleman that has fought off the other wannabe suitors in a duel to the death in the Fabberdome! (Kinda like Thunderdome, but with Shibari harnesses instead of bunjees, and ginormous oversized sex toys instead of standard weapons scattered around... Or I could possibly just be letting my sleep deprivation and excess caffeine affect my slightly overworked brain this morning... in which case, apologies and please ignore the above... "I like that you've put so much effort in. I'm going to carefully consider your suggestions. Thank you. | |||
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"It's exactly the kind of portfolio we find irresistible and those shoes
Unfortunately unless the bisexual fairy gets into your consciousness we wouldn't waste your time by messaging you.
Oh.... almost forgot, happy swinging
How do you like my new profile text? I think it's spot on. I must be honest, I've been getting less messages about my vag and more about the dentist. "sorry i find your tone confusing in your profile, you just describe yourself as 99% of women on earth
plus i like the dentist, i get a sticker everytime i visit | |||
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"Howsabout deliberately making your profile sound like a fella pretending to be a lady?(Admittedly, this will not put off those fab-straight gentleman that are as persistent in their pursuit of men as much as the ladies). Or maybe state that you will only ever reply to the gentleman that has fought off the other wannabe suitors in a duel to the death in the Fabberdome! (Kinda like Thunderdome, but with Shibari harnesses instead of bunjees, and ginormous oversized sex toys instead of standard weapons scattered around... Or I could possibly just be letting my sleep deprivation and excess caffeine affect my slightly overworked brain this morning... in which case, apologies and please ignore the above...
You've been giving that some thought "Ummm... alas, that all just kinda typed itself!! Says a lot about my current state of mind methinks!  | |||
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"Howsabout deliberately making your profile sound like a fella pretending to be a lady?(Admittedly, this will not put off those fab-straight gentleman that are as persistent in their pursuit of men as much as the ladies). Or maybe state that you will only ever reply to the gentleman that has fought off the other wannabe suitors in a duel to the death in the Fabberdome! (Kinda like Thunderdome, but with Shibari harnesses instead of bunjees, and ginormous oversized sex toys instead of standard weapons scattered around... Or I could possibly just be letting my sleep deprivation and excess caffeine affect my slightly overworked brain this morning... in which case, apologies and please ignore the above...
I like that you've put so much effort in. I'm going to carefully consider your suggestions. Thank you. "If a post's worth typing, it's worth typing well! My pleasure. | |||
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"Your such a conundrum OP, how will we ever figure you out...... your on a swingers site , nude pics on display and you don't want people messaging you ? This thread must be so annoying for you when someone posts to it. How will you ever cope ? Meh "I know. ..I wish you'd all just feck off really and leave me alone. I can't stand the attention. Whatever you do don't look at me! | |||
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"Delete your profile "I can't work out how to do it. I've tried clicking on delete profile but that doesn't work. | |||
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"Delete your profile
I can't work out how to do it. I've tried clicking on delete profile but that doesn't work. "Well you're just going to have to put up with receiving message's I'm afraid,so stop your moaning  | |||
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"Just frequent the forums more, people start to ignore you and then you get less mail. I'm on around 2 a day. It's bliss." I'm finding that too. I thought by joining in with the community and replying to posts and even start new threads that I'd get a lot of attention. But it seems it has the reverse effect that I was looking for. I may need to take off the filters that prevent men from winking or messaging me trying to convince me to become bi as apparently that's what I need but don't know it. Or I could just post pics of naked women on my profile | |||
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"I feel like I need to change my profile text now. One of you want to write it for me? "Sure, but obviously I'll have to meet you, to ensure I get the tone right! | |||
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"Hide your photos. " But that would stop the people messaging who she might be interested in?? | |||
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"I changed my profile text in order to put off as many people as possible, yet I'm still getting messages! The ones that amuse me the most start "I know you won't even read this. .." so why bother? What's a girl have to do to make it stop?! Help please. I'm at my wits end. Disclaimer: no actual words from actual messages have been used in the remaking of the above sentence. All similarities to real life situations and people are purely coincidental. Serious suggestions only please. And please stick to the subject. You are not allowed to say anything that I disagree with. Any suggestions made will be disregarded and I'll come up with reasons why I can't. "Why mess on like that? Hide your profile. | |||
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"I changed my profile text in order to put off as many people as possible, yet I'm still getting messages! The ones that amuse me the most start "I know you won't even read this. .." so why bother? What's a girl have to do to make it stop?! Help please. I'm at my wits end. Disclaimer: no actual words from actual messages have been used in the remaking of the above sentence. All similarities to real life situations and people are purely coincidental. Serious suggestions only please. And please stick to the subject. You are not allowed to say anything that I disagree with. Any suggestions made will be disregarded and I'll come up with reasons why I can't.
Why mess on like that? Hide your profile. "Top advice. Thanks | |||
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"Just another 'everyone look at me' thread..... . "Yep. Is that bothering you? | |||
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"Just another 'everyone look at me' thread..... .
Yep. Is that bothering you? "Only because lots have taken you seriously instead of seeing the sarcastic look at me please I need attention tone...... | |||
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"Just another 'everyone look at me' thread..... .
Yep. Is that bothering you?
Only because lots have taken you seriously instead of seeing the sarcastic look at me please I need attention tone...... "I'm not sure why that would bother you but I really don't see that it's my fault if people have taken it seriously | |||
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"Just another 'everyone look at me' thread..... .
Yep. Is that bothering you?
Only because lots have taken you seriously instead of seeing the sarcastic look at me please I need attention tone......
I'm not sure why that would bother you but I really don't see that it's my fault if people have taken it seriously "This site is a swinging site yet is being used like....book. If you open a conversation on the forum surely you expect feedback.... | |||
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"Just another 'everyone look at me' thread..... .
Yep. Is that bothering you?
Only because lots have taken you seriously instead of seeing the sarcastic look at me please I need attention tone......
I'm not sure why that would bother you but I really don't see that it's my fault if people have taken it seriously
This site is a swinging site yet is being used like....book.
If you open a conversation on the forum surely you expect feedback....
"Again,I Don't see that it's my problem. I don't recall getting any feedback from you regarding the op but thanks for your input anyway
(Ps for those of you that saw the"thumbs up" thread, that was an arrogant thumbs up ) | |||
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"Just another 'everyone look at me' thread..... .
Yep. Is that bothering you?
Only because lots have taken you seriously instead of seeing the sarcastic look at me please I need attention tone......
I'm not sure why that would bother you but I really don't see that it's my fault if people have taken it seriously
This site is a swinging site yet is being used like....book.
If you open a conversation on the forum surely you expect feedback....
Again,I Don't see that it's my problem. I don't recall getting any feedback from you regarding the op but thanks for your input anyway
(Ps for those of you that saw the"thumbs up" thread, that was an arrogant thumbs up )"Nothing more than I would expect.... | |||
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"We're all here for attention. Pictures on show etc. So fair play to op if she's getting more then normal. "
Most took it in the humour in which it was intended. | |||
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"We're all here for attention. Pictures on show etc. So fair play to op if she's getting more then normal.
Most took it in the humour in which it was intended."You installed the zapper yet? | |||
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"We're all here for attention. Pictures on show etc. So fair play to op if she's getting more then normal.
Most took it in the humour in which it was intended.
You installed the zapper yet?"There's never an electrician around when you want one | |||
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"It's probably because you've got a foof. And an okish arse.
So you think I should remove them? "Really lovely arse to be fair. Wish mine was that lovely. Yeah pics are the main thing guys look at. You could say you're riddled with STDs in your profile and still get messages. Most won't read it | |||
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