FabSwingers.com forum: GUYS: what women do to try to impress us.. but fail

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just to even up the balance of the other thread started....

I'll kick off....

POUTING in photos!!! Aaaaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh!!

STOP!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Sticking fake dog noses and ears on their pics (filters)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sticking fake dog noses and ears on their pics (filters)"

Unfortunately mate, lots of them look better with dog ears & big floppy tongues hanging out

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just show a beautiful smile! It's much sexier than a duck face

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wear heels that they cant even walk in

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Put a sky remote up their minge.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Read

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Wear heels that they cant even walk in

But I thought the 'Whoopi Goldberg in Ghost' walk was sexy!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mooth shaftMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Close up pics of stretched open pussy. Uuggg!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Wear heels that they cant even walk in

But I thought the 'Whoopi Goldberg in Ghost' walk was sexy!

Every days a school day

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Are we allowed to post on here, too?

If so, I guess if we (women) are not ourselves that might be a tad irritating?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Wear heels that they cant even walk in

But I thought the 'Whoopi Goldberg in Ghost' walk was sexy!

Every days a school day

Piling all my heels onto a big bonfire as we speak!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Wear heels that they cant even walk in

But I thought the 'Whoopi Goldberg in Ghost' walk was sexy!

Every days a school day

Piling all my heels onto a big bonfire as we speak!

lol I'll bring some marshmallows

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"Just to even up the balance of the other thread started....

I'll kick off....

POUTING in photos!!! Aaaaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh!!

STOP!"

oh my god the list is endless on fab

look look i have tits

look look i have a fanny

look look i have a arse

look at my conquests

look at what i let them do to me

need i go on

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women apologising for their body type.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha!!

Totes agree guys

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

Post verifications from other guys who wax lyrical about her cock-sucking prowess

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wear heels that they cant even walk in

Haha who says we walk in them

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Heels are for wearing in bed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Makeup/cakeup! A little decoration like shadow, glitter etc. is fine but the heavy facecake.. not needed. Too much perfume.

Complaining about your body! A beluga whale that's splashing water all about, breaching the surface of the water and doing tricks and flips is sexier than a beached dolphin saying

I need to lose weeeight.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"Put a sky remote up their minge. "

Lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Put a sky remote up their minge.

Lol"

Pmsl

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

About time you lads grew some balls & said your piece , you go for it lads let it all out get it off your lovely chests

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *tressfreeMan
over a year ago

Northampton

There are lots ways to attract the opposite sex aren't there? Chances are that if you don't like how someone comes across it's working. You're not their type?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *unkydesignCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

Status updates about how they have 100+ messages in their inbox. Nobody is interested

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ungbantaMan
over a year ago

Near

Describing that their type or after is 6ft plus totally ripped drive a flash car on 100k a year looking like tom hardy 12 inch plud cock only...when infact the woman is the shape of a tesco bag full of sand on benefits out every weekend #yolo selfys.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Referring to their breasts as "boobies" and having nothing more than a closeup "boobie" selfie. Oh yeah me sooo horny

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Close up pics of stretched open pussy. Uuggg!"

Yeah, as though that's what we're going to greet at the door. Not to mention the pics with dildos and butt plugs.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always have a good selection of buscuits when men folk come round, that seems to go down well.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hahahahahahahahahah

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Buscuits? Biscuits!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Close up pics of stretched open pussy. Uuggg!

Yeah, as though that's what we're going to greet at the door. Not to mention the pics with dildos and butt plugs. "

Methinks you're taking this a little to seriously

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Describing that their type or after is 6ft plus totally ripped drive a flash car on 100k a year looking like tom hardy 12 inch plud cock only...when infact the woman is the shape of a tesco bag full of sand on benefits out every weekend #yolo selfys."

do you think that's to much to ask for then ?!?! Haha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hate the close up, wide open fanny pics... it I wanted to see that I’d bring a speculum!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I also second the ‘inundated with messages’ / ‘1,000,000 messages in inbox’ posts.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aptain VMan
over a year ago

Birstall, Leicester

"Sticking fake dog noses and ears on their pics (filters)"

That's so annoying and sad

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not just women. But those ‘legal disclaimers’ which mean nothing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not just women. But those ‘legal disclaimers’ which mean nothing

"
haha yeah that's a funny one, has anyone even got the university's number haha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate the close up, wide open fanny pics... it I wanted to see that I’d bring a speculum! "

I've had guys say they hate wide open fanny pictures blah blah blah, get to messaging them on kik and they're wanking over a video of me inserting a tampax or having a pee, very contradicting.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate the close up, wide open fanny pics... it I wanted to see that I’d bring a speculum!

I've had guys say they hate wide open fanny pictures blah blah blah, get to messaging them on kik and they're wanking over a video of me inserting a tampax or having a pee, very contradicting. "

Did they wank over a close-up, wide open fanny pic?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate the close up, wide open fanny pics... it I wanted to see that I’d bring a speculum!

I've had guys say they hate wide open fanny pictures blah blah blah, get to messaging them on kik and they're wanking over a video of me inserting a tampax or having a pee, very contradicting. "
not all men are the same, that sounds pretty strange if you ask me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sticking fake dog noses and ears on their pics (filters)

Unfortunately mate, lots of them look better with dog ears & big floppy tongues hanging out

Hahaha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Close up pics of stretched open pussy. Uuggg!

Yeah, as though that's what we're going to greet at the door. Not to mention the pics with dildos and butt plugs.

Methinks you're taking this a little to seriously

Hah, what makes you think that?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate the close up, wide open fanny pics... it I wanted to see that I’d bring a speculum!

I've had guys say they hate wide open fanny pictures blah blah blah, get to messaging them on kik and they're wanking over a video of me inserting a tampax or having a pee, very contradicting. "

Hmmm yes that is contradictory

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Heels are for wearing in bed

and posing for pics

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aranelloMan
over a year ago

Sittingbourne

It does depend on the biscuits ! I mean if you are serving up plain old Digestives, then on your bike lady, but it we are talking jammy dodgers, or a custard cream, then count me in

"Buscuits? Biscuits!"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pouting

Photo filters

Sydney university warnings

And any bio that says "if you like sticks then walk on by" makes me automatically think they are a cunt

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sticking fake dog noses and ears on their pics (filters)

Unfortunately mate, lots of them look better with dog ears & big floppy tongues hanging out

It's preferable to naked men pretending to do the ironing, we all know men can't iron XXX

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hechapMan
over a year ago

Derry

What gets on my tits is when a woman is after a real man yet she has

hair extensions,

mouthful of implants / crowns,

boob job,

botox lips & arse,

fake nails,

fake tan,

fake eye brows,

caked in make up etc etc etc

A "real mans" type for sure!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

"What gets on my tits is when a woman is after a real man yet she has

hair extensions,

mouthful of implants / crowns,

boob job,

botox lips & arse,

fake nails,

fake tan,

fake eye brows,

caked in make up etc etc etc

A "real mans" type for sure!!

I haven't got any of those things

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wear heels that they cant even walk in

But I thought the 'Whoopi Goldberg in Ghost' walk was sexy!

Every days a school day

Piling all my heels onto a big bonfire as we speak!

lol I'll bring some marshmallows

Ha ha ha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *J RHEAMan
over a year ago

S West

Pouting

Fake eyelashes

snapchat filters

I'm not stck thin so if you don't like real curves jog on

1 line profile, yet they want a first message like the works of Shakespeare

Open pussy shots, or just pussy pics, especially if it's not a nice one

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *J RHEAMan
over a year ago

S West

"Sticking fake dog noses and ears on their pics (filters)

Unfortunately mate, lots of them look better with dog ears & big floppy tongues hanging out

It's preferable to naked men pretending to do the ironing, we all know men can't iron XXX"

I can iron, and use a washing machine

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

A lass I spoke to at cupids last, smiled and had a bit of a joke and piss take out of each other didn't play but will keep in contact

TBH if a lass has got a sense of humour that's a massive tick. Some lasses are amazingly good looking but like talking to a dead dodo

A smile, banter a cute bum, is a winner, I don't mind the odd big boobs from time to time

But not many have a cute bum and huge boobs so it's normally one or the other

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What gets on my tits is when a woman is after a real man yet she has

hair extensions,

mouthful of implants / crowns,

boob job,

botox lips & arse,

fake nails,

fake tan,

fake eye brows,

caked in make up etc etc etc

A "real mans" type for sure!!

I haven't got any of those things

me neither

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

me neither"

You REALLY don’t need them! X

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate the close up, wide open fanny pics... it I wanted to see that I’d bring a speculum! "

Totally agree, it's not as if we don't know what one looks like..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate the close up, wide open fanny pics... it I wanted to see that I’d bring a speculum!

Totally agree, it's not as if we don't know what one looks like..

Haha I know. Same as the gaping open ass pics. I ant help thinking they must crap themselves haha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Things women do that annoy men enough to stop them emailing:

1) Ermmmm....

2) Give me a minute....

3) Oh, I know....nope, it's gone.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wear lingerie, they look best naked anyway

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to even up the balance of the other thread started....

I'll kick off....

POUTING in photos!!! Aaaaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh!!

STOP!

oh my god the list is endless on fab

look look i have tits

look look i have a fanny

look look i have a arse

look at my conquests

look at what i let them do to me

need i go on

Laughing out loud here!!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to even up the balance of the other thread started....

I'll kick off....

POUTING in photos!!! Aaaaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh!!

STOP!

oh my god the list is endless on fab

look look i have tits

look look i have a fanny

look look i have a arse

look at my conquests

look at what i let them do to me

need i go on

That might appeal to single men on here

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"Put a sky remote up their minge. "

I wondered why the football kept switching channels when the bar lady moved around

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Moan about cock pics the post one with legs akimbo, fanny stretched, showing off breakfast.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wear lingerie, they look best naked anyway

Ooh but it hides my squidgy bits

Actually I agree its far nicer to be naked!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ucyfur77Woman
over a year ago

Pleasuretown

"Sticking fake dog noses and ears on their pics (filters)"

On here?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There are lots ways to attract the opposite sex aren't there? Chances are that if you don't like how someone comes across it's working. You're not their type? "

....and you probably won't recongmise them unless they have a remote up their minge anyway... am i right?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sticking fake dog noses and ears on their pics (filters)

That's so annoying and sad"

Agree!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tom Hardy is 5'8" ... Just saying

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

A woman in my local is all fake hair,tits,eyelashes a bit like a barbie doll with such a shit attitude that guys still fall over to chat to her.

Me, I prefer to talk to the tom boy nurse who is funny and friendly

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate the close up, wide open fanny pics... it I wanted to see that I’d bring a speculum!

I've had guys say they hate wide open fanny pictures blah blah blah, get to messaging them on kik and they're wanking over a video of me inserting a tampax or having a pee, very contradicting. "

you have video's like that???

Asking for a "friend"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate the close up, wide open fanny pics... it I wanted to see that I’d bring a speculum!

I've had guys say they hate wide open fanny pictures blah blah blah, get to messaging them on kik and they're wanking over a video of me inserting a tampax or having a pee, very contradicting.

you have video's like that???

Asking for a "friend"

I do!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"A woman in my local is all fake hair,tits,eyelashes a bit like a barbie doll with such a shit attitude that guys still fall over to chat to her.

Me, I prefer to talk to the tom boy nurse who is funny and friendly"

I usually go for the quiet one, at the back of the group, they're usually the vixens in the bedroom

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tom Hardy is 5'8" ... Just saying

Sorry I am guilty of the Tom Hardy crush

But I seriously don't find the ripped body, flash car etc etc a thing, infact a total turn off for me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm more of a Sainsbury's bag

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm more of a Sainsbury's bag "

Poundland. What can I say I'm a cheap date!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm more of a Sainsbury's bag

Poundland. What can I say I'm a cheap date!"

Nah the bags are 5p wherever you shop . I was just trying to big myself up

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Make up, less is more ladies.

First date we're going for swims!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wanders in...

Looks around...

Not getting involved in this one..

Disappears quietly back into the man xave...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm more of a Sainsbury's bag

Poundland. What can I say I'm a cheap date!

Nah the bags are 5p wherever you shop . I was just trying to big myself up

Good point well presented but in that case isn't waitrose posher? X

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Makeup/cakeup! A little decoration like shadow, glitter etc. is fine but the heavy facecake.. not needed. Too much perfume.

Complaining about your body! A beluga whale that's splashing water all about, breaching the surface of the water and doing tricks and flips is sexier than a beached dolphin saying

I need to lose weeeight. "

Awww we're just paranoid !!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm more of a Sainsbury's bag

Poundland. What can I say I'm a cheap date!

Nah the bags are 5p wherever you shop . I was just trying to big myself up

Good point well presented but in that case isn't waitrose posher? X"

Didn't want to push my luck

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Fake tan.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks for starting this thread OP, it's been very funny, entertaining and rather refreshing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread