FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

That one thing that stops you hitting the message button

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

There's a few profiles I've got on my hotlist, and I can't bring myself to send a message, dunno what it is that's holding me off though, I fit within their requirements, I'm sure if we did get together we'd have a good laugh but I just don't seem to be able to message them.

Anyone else looked at a profile and thought yes yes yes yes yes...... oh hold on

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I falter where sending messages are concerned because I'm concerned they will think it's a definite fuck for them, because I've shown them interest.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't find the message button!!

Does that count?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

Yep. Had it a few times.

For me it's a lack of confidence or if I'm interested in someone else at the same time I don't wanna have to make the choice between the 2 if by some miracle they both wanted to meet me, heaven forbid on the same day. I'm crap at making decisions.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes all the time

Its just my nature not to be too pushy

If I see a profile I like the look of I'll fab the pics..add to hotlist..and keep checking for updates

If their interested then no doubt they'll notice and and hopefully get in touch

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There's a few profiles I've got on my hotlist, and I can't bring myself to send a message, dunno what it is that's holding me off though, I fit within their requirements, I'm sure if we did get together we'd have a good laugh but I just don't seem to be able to message them.

Anyone else looked at a profile and thought yes yes yes yes yes...... oh hold on "

I mean this in the nicest way

But is it a case of too many knockbacks previously do you think?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

More than one thing, I won't message if

They don't want to meet men

Won't meet smoker's

Won't meet black men

Are into bare back

No point wasting any ones time, by ignoring preferences is there

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uessWhosBackAgainMan
over a year ago

London

Any single woman's profile where some guy approves or arranges the meets

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *anny77Man
over a year ago

glasgow

I'm actually really shy. I can talk for Scotland in real face to face stuff but I never know what to write. I've met people at socials who I tried to start a conversation with in message (once I get started I'm fine but my initial message are.... lacklustre) failed and then we have a laugh about how we would never have spoken if it had been down to that.

That's why I am always telling people socials are important!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilverhaloMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

I would love some one to message me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago

Hull


"I falter where sending messages are concerned because I'm concerned they will think it's a definite fuck for them, because I've shown them interest. "

Me too

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *othrockercplCouple
over a year ago

Halloween Town

Text speak or the word "professional".

Oh and "I'm a (gender) looking to meet men, women and couples" blanket profile that's way to common.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they have loads of verifications. I think they have a massive black book to call upon and I'd have very little chance. I will look at their profile a few times in the hope they might also show an interest and give me a nod. Otherwise I just look. There's lots to look at.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *loppsyWoman
over a year ago

marlow

I never send messages lol x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest...

Nothing.

If I want to message someone, I will. If they don't message back, it's no skin off my nose and they're missing out

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"There's a few profiles I've got on my hotlist, and I can't bring myself to send a message, dunno what it is that's holding me off though, I fit within their requirements, I'm sure if we did get together we'd have a good laugh but I just don't seem to be able to message them.

Anyone else looked at a profile and thought yes yes yes yes yes...... oh hold on

I mean this in the nicest way

But is it a case of too many knockbacks previously do you think?"

Wouldn't say that, had plenty of knock backs but never let it get to me as I know I'm not for everyone, but I've not actively messaged anyone new for quite a while now.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There's a few profiles I've got on my hotlist, and I can't bring myself to send a message, dunno what it is that's holding me off though, I fit within their requirements, I'm sure if we did get together we'd have a good laugh but I just don't seem to be able to message them.

Anyone else looked at a profile and thought yes yes yes yes yes...... oh hold on

I mean this in the nicest way

But is it a case of too many knockbacks previously do you think?

Wouldn't say that, had plenty of knock backs but never let it get to me as I know I'm not for everyone, but I've not actively messaged anyone new for quite a while now. "

Same here mate....I've not been looking to send a message for ages...that may have been my own reasoning

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, very much so. I'm better speaking to people just socially x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

Thinking, 'Can I really be bothered to drive that far on a regular basis?'

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's usually if I think they're too hot. Some ladies on here could be models and it makes me think "they must get 1000 messages a day, they'll never see mine, and if they did they'd never reply".

Possibly lack of confidence on my part, or just a desire to meet someone more real.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilverhaloMan
over a year ago

Glasgow


"I falter where sending messages are concerned because I'm concerned they will think it's a definite fuck for them, because I've shown them interest.

Me too "

Having good seen your profile.I would be hoping for the fuck not necessarily thinking I was going to get it is may add

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lceeWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I'm slightly worried at all the guys on here that seem to think that looking at a girl's profile or fabbing a photo is going to be noticed. I haven't looked at the 'Who's Looked At Me' page in months - it's hard enough keeping up with messages, never mind the rest of it.

I know what is meant though - there's loads of profiles where I've ummed and ahhhhed and then just stuck 'em in my hotlist like a wuss

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll message people who don't use the forums with a view to meet them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *anny77Man
over a year ago

glasgow

I enjoy chatting. I think it's good when it gets going. You can usually tell quite quickly by replies whether someone is on same page.

It's just the initial message.

Don't want to be too laid back... to intense... too serious... too humorous... argh

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah usually cos too far so kinda pointless messaging them

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *Devil77Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

Knowing I probably won't get a reply,and if I do my lack of being able to accommodate at the moment doesn't help.

Then there's the child care to consider.

I will eventually message and arrange something with the lovely ladies locally to me.

Some,bless em meet for socials already.its the other stuff after the socials that's difficult

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ymph84Woman
over a year ago

durham

Men that constantly have the same status message on saying never any filthy slurs on here just gonna delete.

Don't say it and then not follow through.

I also won't message anyone with a cock as their profile pic

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *anny77Man
over a year ago

glasgow


"Yeah usually cos too far so kinda pointless messaging them"

Make them come to you

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

My friend Mark (who is a ninja). He's quite strong.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ


"More than one thing, I won't message if

They don't want to meet men

Won't meet smoker's

Won't meet black men

Are into bare back

No point wasting any ones time, by ignoring preferences is there"

Yeah, but what if they tick all yer boxes, but don't like fishing

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rank EinsteinMan
over a year ago

Burton upon stather


"Any single woman's profile where some guy approves or arranges the meets "

And being "owned"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just fear of rejection tbh x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

It's always been a confidence thing for me. I honestly wouldn't mind being ignored, or a 'no thanks', but don't really want to subject myself to 'ha ha ha, you're punching well above your weight love'

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Generally we never message first and don't have a hotlist, so people really have to catch our eye for us to want to message.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All the time... usually because the other person is way out of my league...

I'll even get as far a writing the message reading it ...

And instead of send I then hit delete...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *K430Man
over a year ago

Tipperary

To be honest, almost always distance related ,no point wasting both of our time if there's virtually no chance we will ever meet up , also if they say they prefer women ,that's usually a good hint

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love message ones on my hotlist but I don't as I think I'm not what they would expect.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"All the time... usually because the other person is way out of my league...

I'll even get as far a writing the message reading it ...

And instead of send I then hit delete...

"

Lmfao I do that... lots... I do it in the forum too.. probably not enough to be fair.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"All the time... usually because the other person is way out of my league...

I'll even get as far a writing the message reading it ...

And instead of send I then hit delete...

Lmfao I do that... lots... I do it in the forum too.. probably not enough to be fair."

Catch myself about to send and think... Awww Hell NO! Have a word with yourself Thrill

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's lots I would like to message just as they look good fun or to appreciate something on the profile etc But if I'm not up for meeting I just wonder if it makes me look like a timewaster? so I don't

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..

I don't really message first. I've done it on two occasions and it has worked out really well but I won't be making a habit of it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan
over a year ago

.

I hardly send messages, In most cases its not the first message but sending a second/third message,

Especially when you get a one/two word reply from your original message

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"All the time... usually because the other person is way out of my league...

I'll even get as far a writing the message reading it ...

And instead of send I then hit delete...

Lmfao I do that... lots... I do it in the forum too.. probably not enough to be fair."

Yeah I do it in the forums too...

Then wander back into the man cave and hope no one notices....

You sure we're not related

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't mind messaging anyone,but when there bio states they are looking for fit men with big cocks, I always second think it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley

Often thought about sending a first message to some forum posters, but always change my mind, usually because I might just want to applaud a post or comment on a thread or that they have some very nice pictures.

I dont send the message as I would not want some to read more into it than that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

For a few of the people that I have ended up replying to them on the forum I have met them and had really good plays

My problem is that because of football it is hard to plan more than a couple of months ahead, and also I am in Manchester every other weekend so for people not in London or Manchester it is hard.

I would rather be honest and say that it is unlikely we would get time to play - than string someone along, though a few people on friends list have been their for 2 years or more and we haven't played but then we have managed to arrange something and

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

A turn off for me can be the profile name - even if the forum posts are great.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top