FabSwingers.com forum: When you miss someone..

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

.. but you can't tell them about it

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

Why can't you tell them OP?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My advice: tell them. Even if they're unobtainable tell them in a non-stalkery or inappropriate way - it's ok to miss someone you like, such as a friend etc.

Doesn't mean you have to want sex or a relationship with them. Life's too short for regrets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My advice: tell them. Even if they're unobtainable tell them in a non-stalkery or inappropriate way - it's ok to miss someone you like, such as a friend etc.

Doesn't mean you have to want sex or a relationship with them. Life's too short for regrets.

Couldn't have put it better myself MrBerks

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

"My advice: tell them. Even if they're unobtainable tell them in a non-stalkery or inappropriate way - it's ok to miss someone you like, such as a friend etc.

Doesn't mean you have to want sex or a relationship with them. Life's too short for regrets.

Yep!

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

".. but you can't tell them about it

I understand that feeling

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

".. but you can't tell them about it

Is there a reason you can't tell them OP?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I miss my dad, very much. I can't tell him because he died over 25 years ago.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've found myself in that position this week with my ex wife as it happens. She split up with her fella and always she leans on me and in her words I go to her rescue, well this time I felt old feelings surfacing, I don't think they went away I just learned to deal with it. So I told her about it and that I think I need to distance myself from her before I got hurt again, I waffled on a bit, she read the message but didn't acknowledge it but has just been texting me normal stuff. I'm in no better position after telling her but I do feel like I've got it off my chest, it was driving me insane but now I'm feeling much better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I miss my dad, very much. I can't tell him because he died over 25 years ago.

I tell my mum I miss her when I'm having a hard time. I know she can't reply, but I like to think she can hear me. It makes me feel better

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"I miss my dad, very much. I can't tell him because he died over 25 years ago.

I miss my stepdad in the same way every christmas even more my one regret is never saying to him I love you when he was alive .

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By *s_macWoman
over a year ago

Traffic land

"I miss my dad, very much. I can't tell him because he died over 25 years ago.

I tell my mum I miss her when I'm having a hard time. I know she can't reply, but I like to think she can hear me. It makes me feel better

I do the same with my Dad and I still send emails to his acct of things I find that he'd like or would make him laugh in the way I used to. I think acknowledging those thoughts/feelings helps

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By *eerobCouple
over a year ago

solihull

"I've found myself in that position this week with my ex wife as it happens. She split up with her fella and always she leans on me and in her words I go to her rescue, well this time I felt old feelings surfacing, I don't think they went away I just learned to deal with it. So I told her about it and that I think I need to distance myself from her before I got hurt again, I waffled on a bit, she read the message but didn't acknowledge it but has just been texting me normal stuff. I'm in no better position after telling her but I do feel like I've got it off my chest, it was driving me insane but now I'm feeling much better. "

At least you know she doesn't feel the same about you anymore. Imagine if she had and you both wanted to get together again. Good you know.. Although she should have really or it would have been nice if she had replied directly to your comments

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

oh I know all that, but thankyou for the advice.

Saw someone I still love return to online dating..

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By *s_macWoman
over a year ago

Traffic land

I think you did the right thing, it's the 'what if?' that can drive us crazy. I'm sorry you didn't get the response you may have hoped for though

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By *irestorm 500Couple
over a year ago

coventry

".. but you can't tell them about it

I understand that feeling "

Yes not always easy to explain yourself so you keep quiet x Storm x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell them OP...

It works out or it doesn't that way. For you I hope it works out.

We only ever regret those things we didn't dare to do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I miss someone, but I stay away, to tell her would mean the upheaval of many lives, and uncertainty for young children, and an old lady with dementia, and as strong as my feelings are, I'm not prepared to hurt all of those people just to satisfy my own needs, I'd hate myself forever if I did, so I just bite the bullet and know that I'm doing the right thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I miss someone, but I stay away, to tell her would mean the upheaval of many lives, and uncertainty for young children, and an old lady with dementia, and as strong as my feelings are, I'm not prepared to hurt all of those people just to satisfy my own needs, I'd hate myself forever if I did, so I just bite the bullet and know that I'm doing the right thing "

Maybe you should just tell her, if her dementia is that bad she'll forget about it anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah I know, she's a stubborn cow, even if she did want me back she'd never admit it because that would be admitting she made a mistake in leaving me. When her life goes tots up I'm the one she goes to and I'm the one who constantly goes to her rescue, we hug, she calls me babe and love like she used to, she even stayed at my house last week when she split up with her fella, anyways I've told her I'm gonna distance myself now, maybe she'll miss me maybe she won't.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"oh I know all that, but thankyou for the advice.

Saw someone I still love return to online dating.. "

Say it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe you should just tell her, if her dementia is that bad she'll forget about it anyway

Yeah, I told you about it last week, never mind, the nurse has got your message

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

Tell them. Fell out with long term friend, ignored him for a few months, he apologised, said me he missed me, friends again.

I dismiss most who piss me off but he's my kryptonite

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I miss my FWB when I haven't seen him for a while, I can't tell him though XXX

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By *irestorm 500Couple
over a year ago

coventry

"I miss my FWB when I haven't seen him for a while, I can't tell him though XXX"

Why hun x Storm x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whilst i have no problem telling those from my present that i love/miss them (if they go away for a bit), i would not tell an ex that i miss them.

Reason being that you're opening yourself up to the possibility of being taken advantage of and a world of hurt if those sentiments fall on deaf ears. That's a level of vulnerability i'd not be comfortable with, personally. Look forwards, never backwards.

That's just me though and everyone is different.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I still miss someone i havent played with for 2 years, I'm sure he knows that but still hurts some days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"oh I know all that, but thankyou for the advice.

Saw someone I still love return to online dating..

Say it. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I miss 2 people I met on here annoyingly.

I miss my siblings. A sister in Canada, no contact for 5yrs. A brother who is either in India or The Phillipines, no contact for yrs and a half sister in Preston who probably wouldn't care if I was dead but I still love her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

".. but you can't tell them about it

Adjust the sights and try again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

".. but you can't tell them about it

I know that feeling OP cuts deep niggles and just won't go away even 3 yrs later it just festers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell them. There's nothing worse with coulda woulda shoulda. Worst case they don't share the same feelings but you never missed your opportunity.

Life is short. And can sometimes be snatched from us without reason or notice. Bite the bullet while you can.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I miss my my best friend that died suddenly 4 years ago.Totally changed my life and way I feel .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hear ya OP. You should tell her and if you do, we want to know the outcome

I miss only one guy I met from here. We were fwb a few years back. He was nasty to me due to crossed wires and so I ended it. Looking back I think he wanted us to be exclusive but I didnt see it at the time.

He even met my daughter (shes an adult) and we went out for walks etc with his dog.

He doesnt come on here now and I contacted him about a year ago asking if he wanted to meet up, he said yes but never ever got back to me.

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

".. but you can't tell them about it

I understand that feeling

Yes not always easy to explain yourself so you keep quiet x Storm x "

I could easily explain how I'm feeling but I'm choosing not to on a public forum.

I know exactly why I'm feeling the way I do. Today is a hard day for me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I hear ya OP. You should tell her and if you do, we want to know the outcome

He even met my daughter (shes an adult) and we went out for walks etc with his dog.

He doesnt come on here now and I contacted him about a year ago asking if he wanted to meet up, he said yes but never ever got back to me.

She asked me not to contact her again. I'm not a wierd, creepy stalker type so that felt strange in itself. It was crossed wires all the way. I can't talk to her because I promised I wouldn't.

So I vented off a random statement to a bunch of strangers to try and get it off my chest.. sometimes it helps, sometimes it's hollow as f

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hear ya OP. You should tell her and if you do, we want to know the outcome

He even met my daughter (shes an adult) and we went out for walks etc with his dog.

He doesnt come on here now and I contacted him about a year ago asking if he wanted to meet up, he said yes but never ever got back to me.

She asked me not to contact her again. I'm not a wierd, creepy stalker type so that felt strange in itself. It was crossed wires all the way. I can't talk to her because I promised I wouldn't.

So I vented off a random statement to a bunch of strangers to try and get it off my chest.. sometimes it helps, sometimes it's hollow as f"

Thats tough. Well .. get over it and move on. Shes not worth your time or energy or emotion.

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By *ticky_vikkiWoman
over a year ago

Herts

"oh I know all that, but thankyou for the advice.

Saw someone I still love return to online dating.. "

This has literally happened to me too this week

I've found it unbearable so I emailed him to tell him how I felt. Nothing ventured, nothing gained and all that. We are now meeting for a drink Tuesday

tell her, you've got nothing to lose

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hear ya OP. You should tell her and if you do, we want to know the outcome

He even met my daughter (shes an adult) and we went out for walks etc with his dog.

He doesnt come on here now and I contacted him about a year ago asking if he wanted to meet up, he said yes but never ever got back to me.

She asked me not to contact her again. I'm not a wierd, creepy stalker type so that felt strange in itself. It was crossed wires all the way. I can't talk to her because I promised I wouldn't.

So I vented off a random statement to a bunch of strangers to try and get it off my chest.. sometimes it helps, sometimes it's hollow as f"

Deep breath, onwards and upwards!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I hear ya OP. You should tell her and if you do, we want to know the outcome

He even met my daughter (shes an adult) and we went out for walks etc with his dog.

He doesnt come on here now and I contacted him about a year ago asking if he wanted to meet up, he said yes but never ever got back to me.

She asked me not to contact her again. I'm not a wierd, creepy stalker type so that felt strange in itself. It was crossed wires all the way. I can't talk to her because I promised I wouldn't.

So I vented off a random statement to a bunch of strangers to try and get it off my chest.. sometimes it helps, sometimes it's hollow as f

Deep breath, onwards and upwards!"

That's the one

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I hear ya OP. You should tell her and if you do, we want to know the outcome

He even met my daughter (shes an adult) and we went out for walks etc with his dog.

He doesnt come on here now and I contacted him about a year ago asking if he wanted to meet up, he said yes but never ever got back to me.

She asked me not to contact her again. I'm not a wierd, creepy stalker type so that felt strange in itself. It was crossed wires all the way. I can't talk to her because I promised I wouldn't.

So I vented off a random statement to a bunch of strangers to try and get it off my chest.. sometimes it helps, sometimes it's hollow as f

Thats tough. Well .. get over it and move on. Shes not worth your time or energy or emotion.

I am doing.. and yes you're right lol harsh but true.

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By *ustalittleKinkWoman
over a year ago

in the shadows

".. but you can't tell them about it

I feel your pain with this atm. Be kind to yourself and let it go

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

".. but you can't tell them about it

I feel your pain with this atm. Be kind to yourself and let it go "

I think that's good advice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Life's too short for regrets"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I miss my dad, very much. I can't tell him because he died over 25 years ago.

I tell my mum I miss her when I'm having a hard time. I know she can't reply, but I like to think she can hear me. It makes me feel better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are many whose loved ones are no longer in this world....

I understand their loss and the wish to still be able to talk with them.

For the rest if us we get one life one chance at this.

If you can't or won't speak to those who may be important to you..... then only you miss out on what the future may hold...

It's become my mantra tonight...

Follow your heart dare to trust and hope in the future...

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By *ish68Man
over a year ago

Near Chirk

When the words of a song echo inside your mind.... "you don't know what you've got til it's gone," I(Big yellow taxi) played the field, then realised I'd been playing too long and it's too late to go back and say those things that should have been said.... You don't want to upset the balance of someone else's life because once again you'd be being selfish...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"When the words of a song echo inside your mind.... "you don't know what you've got til it's gone," I(Big yellow taxi) played the field, then realised I'd been playing too long and it's too late to go back and say those things that should have been said.... You don't want to upset the balance of someone else's life because once again you'd be being selfish... "

nail head done

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By *nglishRose123Woman
over a year ago

Swindon

I hope you don't mind my opinion but to me it sounds as though she is using you. As hard as it is try to move on and find someone who will treat you right and not just to prop them up. Good luck.

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By *ensousladyWoman
over a year ago

Naughtyville

Know this feeling ! Met someone on my couples profile.... totally different for me, but can't do anything about it. Other person has let me know, they are there but not fair on all concerned, so keep my distance now!

You never know what goes on behind closed doors, so don't judge people on that basis.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Whilst i have no problem telling those from my present that i love/miss them (if they go away for a bit), i would not tell an ex that i miss them.

That's just me though and everyone is different."

Pretty much sums up how I view things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Been burnt again and I'm not running after them or telling that I miss them not playing the fool anymore

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Been burnt again and I'm not running after them or telling that I miss them not playing the fool anymore

I hear you brother, I'm the same, I run round after my ex wife every time her life falls apart only to get dropped like a hot brick when she finds someone new. I feel like a right mug.

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