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best way to dispose of

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

A body

I have several in the freezer and the local pig farm has improved its security

So feeding the pigs is not a option

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Vat of Acid!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *icassolifelikeMan
over a year ago

Luton

Eat them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Eat them. "

What about the bones hair and teeth?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Eat them. "

Ah, and my local supermarket is fresh out of fava beans and nice chianti

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fire. Just remember to scatter the ashes afterwards. I like fire. Fire is good

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Eat them. "

Last time a tried that I got indigestion followed by a bout of constipation to much of a protein diet for my sensitive stomach

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By *eather_Loves_SexWoman
over a year ago

Halfway Between London and Brighton


"Eat them.

Ah, and my local supermarket is fresh out of fava beans and nice chianti "
But that only gets rid of the livers no?

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By *icassolifelikeMan
over a year ago

Luton


"Eat them.

What about the bones hair and teeth? "

Don't eat those!!?? That'd be disgusting!

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Vat of Acid! "

What acid I thought about peroxide but I think that will such turn them blond

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Eat them.

What about the bones hair and teeth? "

Sell them as wigs and a nice set of falses

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wood chipper

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Eat them.

Ah, and my local supermarket is fresh out of fava beans and nice chianti But that only gets rid of the livers no? "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I post a meet on fab.

Nobody responds

They're all gone...pooooof.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

One of your best bets would actually be humble drain unblocker. Or, more specifically, the sodium hydroxide found in most drain unblockers.

Seeing as these cleaning products are designed to dissolve organic, specifically human, debris such as the hair and skin that gets washed down your plughole, in high enough concentration, it would make short work of the cadaver. All that would be left is a brittle "shell" of a skeleton that is easily ground up and cleared away.

Incidentally, the resulting bonemeal would make excellent plant food for your rose bed. Do with that information what you will.

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Fire. Just remember to scatter the ashes afterwards. I like fire. Fire is good "

You mean the old oil drum full of petrol submerge the body set fire and leave to burn its self out over a day or two totally destroying the body in the process good idea but I'm worried about the environmental damage of such a action

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Wood chipper "

Messy I hate messy

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"One of your best bets would actually be humble drain unblocker. Or, more specifically, the sodium hydroxide found in most drain unblockers.

Seeing as these cleaning products are designed to dissolve organic, specifically human, debris such as the hair and skin that gets washed down your plughole, in high enough concentration, it would make short work of the cadaver. All that would be left is a brittle "shell" of a skeleton that is easily ground up and cleared away.

Incidentally, the resulting bonemeal would make excellent plant food for your rose bed. Do with that information what you will."

I see you've handled this sort of problem before

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Fire. Just remember to scatter the ashes afterwards. I like fire. Fire is good

You mean the old oil drum full of petrol submerge the body set fire and leave to burn its self out over a day or two totally destroying the body in the process good idea but I'm worried about the environmental damage of such a action "
. Don't worry about it the diesel car will be no more soon. So more fires can be started.

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By *ola.Woman
over a year ago

Just where I need to be.

I find bodies make a good base for a rockery. Doesn't have to be level. I throw in a dead cat as well as I like to think the men have pussy then.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"One of your best bets would actually be humble drain unblocker. Or, more specifically, the sodium hydroxide found in most drain unblockers.

Seeing as these cleaning products are designed to dissolve organic, specifically human, debris such as the hair and skin that gets washed down your plughole, in high enough concentration, it would make short work of the cadaver. All that would be left is a brittle "shell" of a skeleton that is easily ground up and cleared away.

Incidentally, the resulting bonemeal would make excellent plant food for your rose bed. Do with that information what you will.

I see you've handled this sort of problem before "

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Fire. Just remember to scatter the ashes afterwards. I like fire. Fire is good

You mean the old oil drum full of petrol submerge the body set fire and leave to burn its self out over a day or two totally destroying the body in the process good idea but I'm worried about the environmental damage of such a action . Don't worry about it the diesel car will be no more soon. So more fires can be started. "

That's good to know it mean coal fires are back in to because a used to have a nice coal fed boiler that came in very handy for this sort of thing

Oh those where the days

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"I find bodies make a good base for a rockery. Doesn't have to be level. I throw in a dead cat as well as I like to think the men have pussy then. "

Your so caring

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not so much coal fires. I've installed a lot of wood burners though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Put it in with chickens. I've put entire carcasses in and found only a few fragments after.

Any hard bits can be ground down and flushed.

They won't eat the gallbladder, as it's bitter, but that's small enough for household waste.

Plus you'll get eggs. Chickens rock.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Burn them

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Put it in with chickens. I've put entire carcasses in and found only a few fragments after.

Any hard bits can be ground down and flushed.

They won't eat the gallbladder, as it's bitter, but that's small enough for household waste.

Plus you'll get eggs. Chickens rock."

Them little blighters there mans best friend when it comes to body disposal just like the pigs who eat everything by the way

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By *lmostthereMan
over a year ago

Southampton


"Put it in with chickens. I've put entire carcasses in and found only a few fragments after.

Any hard bits can be ground down and flushed.

They won't eat the gallbladder, as it's bitter, but that's small enough for household waste.

Plus you'll get eggs. Chickens rock."

And someone was just saying how welcoming the good people of Essex were.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Burn them

"
. Just Jo. I like you we are on the same page

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Put it in with chickens. I've put entire carcasses in and found only a few fragments after.

Any hard bits can be ground down and flushed.

They won't eat the gallbladder, as it's bitter, but that's small enough for household waste.

Plus you'll get eggs. Chickens rock.

And someone was just saying how welcoming the good people of Essex were. "

Oh we are we have lots of chickens and pigs in this neck of the woods that we just love to introduce our friends to once we have prepared them for the live stock

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bury it in a pit of lime, it destroys anything and any DNA evidence. Nothing left to dispose of then x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Bury it in a pit of lime, it destroys anything and any DNA evidence. Nothing left to dispose of then x "
. I also like this idea I have a bag of lime in my van.

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Bury it in a pit of lime, it destroys anything and any DNA evidence. Nothing left to dispose of then x "

That's good to know as I have a habit of leaving marks on my victims oops I mean special friends

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Become a funeral director have i got anything to be scared of yet. I will always be a good girl handsonJohn

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Become a funeral director have i got anything to be scared of yet. I will always be a good girl handsonJohn "

Your my partner in crime sexy you have nothing to worry about honesty I even told you before our first social the axe and the shovel in the back of my van were not for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Suddenly I feel very afraid...

Is this where the Unlos go ...

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By *lmostthereMan
over a year ago

Southampton


"Suddenly I feel very afraid...

Is this where the Unlos go ..."

Fab dead pool. The forum cabal run an odds book.

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Suddenly I feel very afraid...

Is this where the Unlos go ..."

I would just like to put it on record I no nothing about all the disappearances around here of late

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Become a funeral director have i got anything to be scared of yet. I will always be a good girl handsonJohn

Your my partner in crime sexy you have nothing to worry about honesty I even told you before our first social the axe and the shovel in the back of my van were not for you "

Is that why you keep bring me curry to eat taste good though

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Become a funeral director have i got anything to be scared of yet. I will always be a good girl handsonJohn

Your my partner in crime sexy you have nothing to worry about honesty I even told you before our first social the axe and the shovel in the back of my van were not for you

Is that why you keep bring me curry to eat taste good though "

Cheeky

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In a coffin with someone who's about to be buried.... Just remember to swipe the security camera...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Erm what have I just stumbled in on.

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"In a coffin with someone who's about to be buried.... Just remember to swipe the security camera... "

I can thing of a few comedy poses a could set up given enough time

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Erm what have I just stumbled in on."

The fabs serial killers forum are you a member if not I'm going to need your name and address please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Erm what have I just stumbled in on.

The fabs serial killers forum are you a member if not I'm going to need your name and address please "

Is this the dark Web.

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Erm what have I just stumbled in on.

The fabs serial killers forum are you a member if not I'm going to need your name and address please

Is this the dark Web.

"

All will be explained on Friday the 13th

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your going to scare them all off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Erm what have I just stumbled in on.

The fabs serial killers forum are you a member if not I'm going to need your name and address please

Is this the dark Web.

All will be explained on Friday the 13th "
well I think that's my que to leave.

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Your going to scare them all off "

No guts no play

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By *aul1973HullMan
over a year ago

East Hull

Coat in plaster of Paris then paint and sell on eBay as 'Life size garden gnomes'

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Coat in plaster of Paris then paint and sell on eBay as 'Life size garden gnomes' "

I like it as there both rather tasty maybe sell them in the adult session as stress relief life size dolls

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By *lueWonderMan
over a year ago

Preston.....ish

I have the perfect hiding place. It's working so far as its not been found

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Could sell them to the desperate people on fab who want a fuck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

whilst its still alive id fuck it within an inch of its life and until it is only a shadow of its former self - fold it up and file it

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"I have the perfect hiding place. It's working so far as its not been found "

Your a beginner always dispose of the body without a trace serial killing 1o1

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Could sell them to the desperate people on fab who want a fuck "

Ooo you naughty little minx put those claws away

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"whilst its still alive id fuck it within an inch of its life and until it is only a shadow of its former self - fold it up and file it "

How do you think they died

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"whilst its still alive id fuck it within an inch of its life and until it is only a shadow of its former self - fold it up and file it

How do you think they died "

when i fold i run a knife along the creases - that might just do it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This thread just reminded me of my favourite film

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"whilst its still alive id fuck it within an inch of its life and until it is only a shadow of its former self - fold it up and file it

How do you think they died

when i fold i run a knife along the creases - that might just do it "

All mine died curled up in a ball from exhaustion

Makes for easy storage though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This thread just reminded me of my favourite film "

What film is that. I see dead people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This thread just reminded me of my favourite film

What film is that. I see dead people "

Shallow Grave

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By *aul1973HullMan
over a year ago

East Hull

Maybe if we all put our heads together we could develop a way of converting them into energy to charge electric vehicles?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One of your best bets would actually be humble drain unblocker. Or, more specifically, the sodium hydroxide found in most drain unblockers.

Seeing as these cleaning products are designed to dissolve organic, specifically human, debris such as the hair and skin that gets washed down your plughole, in high enough concentration, it would make short work of the cadaver. All that would be left is a brittle "shell" of a skeleton that is easily ground up and cleared away.

Incidentally, the resulting bonemeal would make excellent plant food for your rose bed. Do with that information what you will."

*runs to buy rose plants*

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

Throw them overboard in shark-infested waters.

Not only are you disposing of the body in an environmentaly sensitive manner, you are also supporting the wildlife.

It's a win-win situation...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Throw them in a cave and let the rats feast on them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shave the body from head to toe, remove the teeth and grind them to dust with a pestle and mortar then whilst the body is frozen put it thru a heavy duty wood chipper and send the chippings into a river, the fish will do the rest. Job done

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville


"Shave the body from head to toe, remove the teeth and grind them to dust with a pestle and mortar then whilst the body is frozen put it thru a heavy duty wood chipper and send the chippings into a river, the fish will do the rest. Job done "

Sounds like a lot of effort, and messy, too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Shave the body from head to toe, remove the teeth and grind them to dust with a pestle and mortar then whilst the body is frozen put it thru a heavy duty wood chipper and send the chippings into a river, the fish will do the rest. Job done

Sounds like a lot of effort, and messy, too "

Nobody said it was easy

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville


"Shave the body from head to toe, remove the teeth and grind them to dust with a pestle and mortar then whilst the body is frozen put it thru a heavy duty wood chipper and send the chippings into a river, the fish will do the rest. Job done

Sounds like a lot of effort, and messy, too

Nobody said it was easy "

I did...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Eat them. "

That's exactly what a lad I went to school with did. He murdered his mother and ate her. Not only that but he invited his friends and neighbours around numerous times to join him for BBQ's. His speciality was home made burgers!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One of your best bets would actually be humble drain unblocker. Or, more specifically, the sodium hydroxide found in most drain unblockers.

Seeing as these cleaning products are designed to dissolve organic, specifically human, debris such as the hair and skin that gets washed down your plughole, in high enough concentration, it would make short work of the cadaver. All that would be left is a brittle "shell" of a skeleton that is easily ground up and cleared away.

Incidentally, the resulting bonemeal would make excellent plant food for your rose bed. Do with that information what you will."

Forget my offer to clean, I may not come back lol.

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By *rowleyMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Removal all teeth and finger prints.

Burn the body and go through the ash to catch anything that doesn't burn (metal implants, etc)

Scatter the ashes in the ocean.

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By *illnatMan
over a year ago

wherever i need to be


"One of your best bets would actually be humble drain unblocker. Or, more specifically, the sodium hydroxide found in most drain unblockers.

Seeing as these cleaning products are designed to dissolve organic, specifically human, debris such as the hair and skin that gets washed down your plughole, in high enough concentration, it would make short work of the cadaver. All that would be left is a brittle "shell" of a skeleton that is easily ground up and cleared away.

Incidentally, the resulting bonemeal would make excellent plant food for your rose bed. Do with that information what you will."

Remind me never to get you mad lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Place body in a yacht with auto "pilot" sail it just off quiet Cornish coast, set "pilot" to New York then slip over the side after first removing all bilige plugs, swim ashore.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Disguise them as Ozzy Osbourne and leave then in Madame Tussauds.

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville


"Disguise them as Ozzy Osbourne and leave then in Madame Tussauds."

...might start to smell after a while...

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

Take my boat out into the middle of the Chanel, then putting the body through the wood chopper as we head west with the tide.

Once done, dismantle chipper, dropping a piece overboard every few 100yrds.

After all small machine parts have gone, liberally douse the boat & any remaining large parts in fuel & set light.

Proceed to head back to shore in kayak.

No, I've not given this much thought at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One of your best bets would actually be humble drain unblocker. Or, more specifically, the sodium hydroxide found in most drain unblockers.

Seeing as these cleaning products are designed to dissolve organic, specifically human, debris such as the hair and skin that gets washed down your plughole, in high enough concentration, it would make short work of the cadaver. All that would be left is a brittle "shell" of a skeleton that is easily ground up and cleared away.

Incidentally, the resulting bonemeal would make excellent plant food for your rose bed. Do with that information what you will."

Sadly life isn't quite like a tv show.

The amount of sodium hydroxide youd need would put you well into the industrial quantities level.

Not to mention shit doesnt break down cleanly you end up with lots of lumps and crap where it can't penetrate.

You'd need lots of heat, agitation and mechanical mashing to effectively do it not just let it sit.

Then there's the smell and the fumes to thibk about plus the now 100+ gallons of human sludge/industrial waste you have to deal with.

I always like the idea of a quiet river somewhere and a wood chipper.

Fish/organisms will eat the flakes if you spray it into the water but then you gotta clean the damn chipper.

Perhaps a commercial blender (blend tech, will it blend anyone?)and a good butchers knife and do it slowly peice by peice before dumping it say a liter at a time in a pond or river.

Time consuming through amd yoire going to leave a shit ton of evidence where ever you do it.

Remeber though for all of you thinking of using say strong acid.

Always add the acid to the water, NEVER Add small quantities of water to strong concentrated acids. Or you'll probbaly lose your face in the resulting blast.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are all over thinking this, bung a good bribe to the person at the local cremation place and double stack them with registered customers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You are all over thinking this, bung a good bribe to the person at the local cremation place and double stack them with registered customers. "

Too risky if its more than around 8k and the idiot banks it within a year the bank will start investigating the source if the funds.

He'd roll on you in a second adding thst you threatened to kill him if he didnt help

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By *rGuyMan
over a year ago

Croydon

Couple of my mates own concrete firms or another couple work for funeral parlours.

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By *ty31Man
over a year ago

NW London

Put your taxidermy skills to good use and create an interesting centrepiece for your bachelor pad.

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

miss Sweeny has come up with a cunning disposal plan that I'm assured will make us a few quid as well as solve the problem in hand

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dump the body in the New Zealand forum.

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By *andsonjohn OP   Man
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Dump the body in the New Zealand forum."

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By *lutandhubbyCouple
over a year ago

west midlands

chop it up, cook it then feed it the dog. xx

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