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By *ylan11 OP   Man
over a year ago

osterley

After reading so many good posts on the help topic , I just want to understand why we humans do so , is it for reward or for selflessness? Do you do it for praise or for love ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want a good life when i am reincarnated

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No such thing as selflessness, so I would say people help others to make themselves feel better.

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By *ylan11 OP   Man
over a year ago

osterley


"No such thing as selflessness, so I would say people help others to make themselves feel better."

Probably so but how about people who like sharing there knowledge, is that for the greater good or the fact that they know ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No such thing as selflessness, so I would say people help others to make themselves feel better.

Probably so but how about people who like sharing there knowledge, is that for the greater good or the fact that they know ? "

"People who LIKE sharing their knowledge"

There, you've answered your own question.

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By *ylan11 OP   Man
over a year ago

osterley


"No such thing as selflessness, so I would say people help others to make themselves feel better.

Probably so but how about people who like sharing there knowledge, is that for the greater good or the fact that they know ?

"People who LIKE sharing their knowledge"

There, you've answered your own question."

Funny enough I thought I did but I still posted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Slight feeling of superiority.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I help people because it makes me feel good. We both benefit.

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By *ylan11 OP   Man
over a year ago

osterley


"I help people because it makes me feel good. We both benefit. "

Hope you didn't mind me mentioning your post x

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

Giving others a hand.

It feels good to help. If you can make someone's life a bit easier then why wouldn't you?

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By *odkaredbull23Man
over a year ago

some where central

I help people if I can because I've had some really really low points in my life and when someone helped asking for nothing in return it made me extremely greatful and appreciative.

So now when I help it's not to make me feel anything..its purely because I know what difference a little bit of kindness can make to someone and their life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i just like to be nice

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By *elloIntrigueMan
over a year ago

North West UK


"i just like to be nice "

My view too and if some people can take some help from anything I say then all well and good for society.

It's never all about self, not for me anyway.

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By *ylan11 OP   Man
over a year ago

osterley


"I help people if I can because I've had some really really low points in my life and when someone helped asking for nothing in return it made me extremely greatful and appreciative.

So now when I help it's not to make me feel anything..its purely because I know what difference a little bit of kindness can make to someone and their life."

From what you have said makes you a legend

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By *ylan11 OP   Man
over a year ago

osterley


"i just like to be nice "

Your amazing

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By *ylan11 OP   Man
over a year ago

osterley


"i just like to be nice

My view too and if some people can take some help from anything I say then all well and good for society.

It's never all about self, not for me anyway."

Top Man

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By *ylan11 OP   Man
over a year ago

osterley


"Giving others a hand.

It feels good to help. If you can make someone's life a bit easier then why wouldn't you?

"

I would and I do , hearing so many positive posts makes ME feel good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I help people because it makes me feel good. We both benefit.

Hope you didn't mind me mentioning your post x"

Not at all. I like it when discussions grow x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I want a good life when i am reincarnated "

reincarnation? i want to come back as your boxers..

knowing my luck it will be gordon browns jockstrap

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would like to think that its more of a human nature trait to help someone than not help them in my experience anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

its nice to be nice in this world

you never know it could be you

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I don't think I've read the thread.

I've some uncertainty over whether people do anything for nothing - in so far as our behaviors are purposeful. We seek to gain something by doing thing, so the jury is out on altruism.

Obviously as someone who is saintly, I may be the exception to the rule.

Much of the payoff from our actions is a change in our state - how we get to feel. We give something, such as food to a starving person and gain relief from our discomfort, for example. Or we feel good, perhaps by reinforcing our belief in yourself as a decent person.

We often feel dissonance when something isn't right - so making amends gives us relief.

I enjoy giving to others - which likely means that what I do isn't altruistic. It's somewhat habitual, as I do it frequently - drug addicts still get their payoffs, however long they've taken drugs. But the reward can appear weaker, prompting further repetition.

Some thoughts to consider

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By *ylan11 OP   Man
over a year ago

osterley


"I want a good life when i am reincarnated

reincarnation? i want to come back as your boxers..

knowing my luck it will be gordon browns jockstrap "

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I want a good life when i am reincarnated

reincarnation? i want to come back as your boxers..

knowing my luck it will be gordon browns jockstrap "

lol

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

If helping makes a person feel good why wouldn't they do it. Isn't that how karma works? It isn't about bad things happening to bad people but more about how you feel about yourself and the energy you create around you.

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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•

a lot of people help others because they've needed help themselves and empathy makes them remember how that felt and they didn't enjoy that feeling and so don't want others to feel the same as they did. this is the main reason why it's thought why those with the least tend to be the most generous.

some help others hoping that when they need help someone will give it to them, these people are the most likely to be disappointed, especially as takers are naturally drawn to them. although when you look at carers in general and more personal relationships the consensus tends to be that people look after family, parents mainly, because they feel it's their duty as their parents looked after them at one time. so, i think when someone has helped you personally you do tend to feel some obligation to return that favour.

some people do tend to feel obligated to help those less fortunate as well, just because they can. i think it's again down to a sense of duty. on the whole all animals tend to look after their own when able to and when not able to they're kind of fucked and we understand this.

so i think when something affects someone personally they have the deepest understanding of how another person in that situation feels. it's why i often think there should be different criteria for those running the country, in that instead of choosing those who have had a privileged and possibly sheltered life we should choose those with more experience of every hardship any human can go through, or at least make it part of their training to personally experience that for several years.

karma is bullshit. you live in the here and now, and although i believe in cause and effect i do not believe some mystical force is gonna reward you for being good and punish you for being bad.

i think everything we do has incentives, because we're always searching for answers to justify ourselves.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"a lot of people help others because they've needed help themselves and empathy makes them remember how that felt and they didn't enjoy that feeling and so don't want others to feel the same as they did. this is the main reason why it's thought why those with the least tend to be the most generous.

some help others hoping that when they need help someone will give it to them, these people are the most likely to be disappointed, especially as takers are naturally drawn to them. although when you look at carers in general and more personal relationships the consensus tends to be that people look after family, parents mainly, because they feel it's their duty as their parents looked after them at one time. so, i think when someone has helped you personally you do tend to feel some obligation to return that favour.

some people do tend to feel obligated to help those less fortunate as well, just because they can. i think it's again down to a sense of duty. on the whole all animals tend to look after their own when able to and when not able to they're kind of fucked and we understand this.

so i think when something affects someone personally they have the deepest understanding of how another person in that situation feels. it's why i often think there should be different criteria for those running the country, in that instead of choosing those who have had a privileged and possibly sheltered life we should choose those with more experience of every hardship any human can go through, or at least make it part of their training to personally experience that for several years.

karma is bullshit. you live in the here and now, and although i believe in cause and effect i do not believe some mystical force is gonna reward you for being good and punish you for being bad.

i think everything we do has incentives, because we're always searching for answers to justify ourselves. "

What she said with brass knobs on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I help because I have the knowledge and empathy to understand what they're going through. Knowing someone isn't going to feel how I once did is all the thanks I need. X

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By *imandHerNottsCouple
over a year ago

North Notts

We like to help because we have a very early and very well negotiated club card point deal. Tesco completely hate the fact that we are super nice and super helpful but we take our satisfaction in bananas, aubergines and K Y jelly lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"After reading so many good posts on the help topic , I just want to understand why we humans do so , is it for reward or for selflessness? Do you do it for praise or for love ? "

It feels good to help others, especially those starting out on the scene.

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