FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Stalker

Jump to newest
 

By *lackHardDick OP   Man
over a year ago

London

Ok i know am putting myself out there for stick lol

But

I use to have this FuckBuddy We always have crazy wild untamed Sex.

We both see other people.

One day she told me she was falling inlove with me she then went on to say we can't continue we have to stop seeing each other i agreed even though i didnt like what i was hearing i respected her choice no arguments etc.

Fast forward to 3months later.

I get a message on my phone "What You Up To". I kindly replied nothing she then went on to curse me out.........so i blocked her.

2Weeks later am heading to work getting off my last bus infront work she getting on the bus. Then later that evening she was at the bus stop i had to use again didnt really think much of it so i went to the stop she at first said hi i replied hi then she instantly went on a rant "how could i do her like this she gave me her body fell inlove with me now am treating her like shit" etc.......the bus came we went on it i went upstairs she stayed downstairs.

Following day i saw her in the morning same thing coming off she going on. But at lunch time there is a cafe we go to have lunch i went there guess who? its her again ordering giving me the look off hate....

Am getting frustrated now

What should i say or do

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•

tell her you'll chat to her if she stops ranting at you, if you even wanna talk to her?

other wise ask her to leave you alone.

she might be ok after just getting things off her chest and you explaining to her you don't want to see her again could give her some closure.

but only do what you want to do, don't feel obliged to sort out anything, it's just it might help her sort her head out.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

What happened in the fast forwarded three months? No contact at all?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lackHardDick OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"tell her you'll chat to her if she stops ranting at you, if you even wanna talk to her?

other wise ask her to leave you alone.

she might be ok after just getting things off her chest and you explaining to her you don't want to see her again could give her some closure.

but only do what you want to do, don't feel obliged to sort out anything, it's just it might help her sort her head out."

Thanks

After she messaged 3months later and asked what I was up to that's what i told her that we can't go back to having sex thats when she flipped on me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lackHardDick OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"What happened in the fast forwarded three months? No contact at all? "

No Contact at all

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"tell her you'll chat to her if she stops ranting at you, if you even wanna talk to her?

other wise ask her to leave you alone.

she might be ok after just getting things off her chest and you explaining to her you don't want to see her again could give her some closure.

but only do what you want to do, don't feel obliged to sort out anything, it's just it might help her sort her head out.

Thanks

After she messaged 3months later and asked what I was up to that's what i told her that we can't go back to having sex thats when she flipped on me"

her feelings won't have stopped when she ended it, feelings don't die like that.

i'm not blaming you for that or anything she does either.

i think she held off contact for as long as she could but for some reason she contacted you by phone.

she didn't get the reply she was hoping for and so flipped. i'm not making excuses for that but she had feelings, they haven't gone. the flipping out is understandable.

what happened next though isn't, seeing as in her head she hasn't ended anything it's almost understandable, but is also totally unreasonable. and i suppose the next thought is, is this person rational?

she knows you don't want to see her, maybe she didn't get to vent everything out when you blocked her but even a rational person would understand that block means leave me alone and you should handle your feelings yourself. she hasn't handled her feelings, it's not down to you to handle them for her. maybe a one off chat with her explaining how you feel might give her closure. it will hurt her but it'll be for her own good.

letting her vent everything will be hard for you but you could look at it as doing one last favour for someone who cares for you and that when the conversation is finished that everything is over from your side and that'll be it.

i'm presuming she's rational, her stalking is not rational though so this might not even work. she might just want to control you, which isn't love at all so her feelings were wrong about you. it's possible she just wants to control you because you fulfil something in her that she needs.

if you have to bring the police into it then do that as well. i;d go for the sort it yourself first if you can but sometimes you aren't dealing with a rational person so won't be able to sort it yourself.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

This is a tough one. If it gets any worse contact one of the anti-stalking charities for advice on how to deal with it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Talk to the police if it doesn't stop.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lackHardDick OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"tell her you'll chat to her if she stops ranting at you, if you even wanna talk to her?

other wise ask her to leave you alone.

she might be ok after just getting things off her chest and you explaining to her you don't want to see her again could give her some closure.

but only do what you want to do, don't feel obliged to sort out anything, it's just it might help her sort her head out.

Thanks

After she messaged 3months later and asked what I was up to that's what i told her that we can't go back to having sex thats when she flipped on me

her feelings won't have stopped when she ended it, feelings don't die like that.

i'm not blaming you for that or anything she does either.

i think she held off contact for as long as she could but for some reason she contacted you by phone.

she didn't get the reply she was hoping for and so flipped. i'm not making excuses for that but she had feelings, they haven't gone. the flipping out is understandable.

what happened next though isn't, seeing as in her head she hasn't ended anything it's almost understandable, but is also totally unreasonable. and i suppose the next thought is, is this person rational?

she knows you don't want to see her, maybe she didn't get to vent everything out when you blocked her but even a rational person would understand that block means leave me alone and you should handle your feelings yourself. she hasn't handled her feelings, it's not down to you to handle them for her. maybe a one off chat with her explaining how you feel might give her closure. it will hurt her but it'll be for her own good.

letting her vent everything will be hard for you but you could look at it as doing one last favour for someone who cares for you and that when the conversation is finished that everything is over from your side and that'll be it.

i'm presuming she's rational, her stalking is not rational though so this might not even work. she might just want to control you, which isn't love at all so her feelings were wrong about you. it's possible she just wants to control you because you fulfil something in her that she needs.

if you have to bring the police into it then do that as well. i;d go for the sort it yourself first if you can but sometimes you aren't dealing with a rational person so won't be able to sort it yourself."

Thanks alot for your advice will try to calm her down and try talking to her again

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"This is a tough one. If it gets any worse contact one of the anti-stalking charities for advice on how to deal with it."

this might be better advice though.

but hopefully it gets sorted. after 3 months you'd think things would've settled down and some things accepted.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *emi2017Woman
over a year ago

Nottingham

I'm assuming she has no reason to be in that area to catch the same buses?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you're being too nice OP - just tell her to fuck off following you around or you'll involve the police. If the tables were turned and it was a guy stalking a woman there would be no hesitation, so why try to reason with her?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lackHardDick OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"This is a tough one. If it gets any worse contact one of the anti-stalking charities for advice on how to deal with it."

To be honest i dont want to have go through all that if am honest.

Thanks though

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lackHardDick OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"I'm assuming she has no reason to be in that area to catch the same buses? "

Thats the thing not saying your wrong for asking but its a free world so am trying to not assume she had no other business around my work area

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think you're being too nice OP - just tell her to fuck off following you around or you'll involve the police. If the tables were turned and it was a guy stalking a woman there would be no hesitation, so why try to reason with her? "

The voice of reason

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *emi2017Woman
over a year ago

Nottingham


"I'm assuming she has no reason to be in that area to catch the same buses?

Thats the thing not saying your wrong for asking but its a free world so am trying to not assume she had no other business around my work area"

I understand that, I was only trying to see if she couldn't help it. For example if she was just as frustrated at see you as you were to see her. Still doesn't excuse the behaviour when you two came into contact though as you were civil and polite and she was... Well, not.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lackHardDick OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"I think you're being too nice OP - just tell her to fuck off following you around or you'll involve the police. If the tables were turned and it was a guy stalking a woman there would be no hesitation, so why try to reason with her? "

My first initial reaction was to tell her fuck off too but tried to be the bigger person

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be firm with her. Tell her to stop harassing you or you'll have to get the police involved.

I had a stalker, and it got very intimidating.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top